A/N: You can thank the White Stripes' Martyr For My Love For You for this unexpected chapter. Oh, and the lovely reviewers. You guys make me so happy. Seriously, they were some of the most thoughtful I've ever gotten.
Caroline rolled over in bed and yawned. It felt like she'd been asleep for days. She sat up in bed and the increased elevation did nothing to clear the hazy feeling still running rampant in her head. She caught scent of something foul and grimaced. Time to hit the shower.
She stayed under the spray for a good half-hour. It was amazing how wonderful the hot water felt pouring over her body. It cleared her head a little, too. When she finally got out—because the water was getting cold, not because she wanted to—she realized she had nothing to change into. She picked up a light blue button up shirt from a stack of clothes near the towel rack and sniffed it. It smelled fine so she put it on and only bothered to get a few buttons.
She stumbled into the kitchen with purpose. "Foodfoodfood," she chanted as she danced a small victory dance when she found cereal that was hardly stale at all. She poured the colorful shapes into the biggest bowl she could find and then drenched it with milk. She was halfway through her first bite when she saw Stefan staring at her.
His face was inscrutable. Caroline wondered if the kid ever smiled and made it her mission to see if she could be the one to make such an expression cross his face. She offered him a second spoon and he took it. He sat opposite her at the kitchen counter and they both started to devour the cereal.
"So," Caroline started slowly when there was only slightly off-color milk left, "What did you think of last night?" She grinned.
"Where'd you get that stuff? I was out like a light." He shook his head as if he still felt the effects.
"But you remember before, right? Wasn't that good?" Caroline's voice was tinged with the slightest bit of worry. This felt too much like rejection.
Stefan covered his eyes. "It shouldn't have happened." He seemed to feel the need to look at her again. "But yeah, it felt—I've never felt that much."
Caroline smiled contentedly and swirled around the milk with her spoon. It was clear he wasn't going to drink it, and neither was she, so she got up to dump it in the sink. She heard him grunt in surprise behind her and turned around. She caught him staring at the bottom of her ass where it had peeked out from the tail of the shirt. "See something you like?" She teased.
"You're wearing my shirt," he said accusingly. "Only my shirt."
"Is it?" She asked innocently. "Do you want it back?" She undid one of the buttons and the shirt gaped open to reveal more flesh.
Stefan, ever the gentlemen, looked away. "We can't do what we did last night." Flashes of how soft her skin felt raced through his head. He could still hear her loud giggling and how he'd desperately tried to shush her. If Damon and Elena walked in they'd have been done for.
He walked back to the living room and collapsed back onto the couch. He flipped the channels to some colorful cartoons.
Caroline sat next to him. "Why not?" She challenged.
His head fell back and his eyes closed. "Because it was wrong."
Caroline slipped onto his lap and straddled him. She put her hands on his shoulders and reveled in how strong he was. "Why? Am I too old?" She pouted as she grinded into him.
"No. Damon. Elena." Stefan sounded resigned.
At her sister's name Caroline froze and her teeth clenched.
She was still on his lap and Stefan could feel her reaction. "Why do you do that?"
"What?" Caroline said angrily.
"You act like you hate her." Caroline shook her head but Stefan continued, "And she can tell, too, you know. It hurts her."
"Poor baby Elena," Caroline said bitterly. She sighed at Stefan's shocked look. "Hey, Elena is all I have, okay? I love her so much." She sounded sincere, but Stefan knew she was holding back.
"But-?" He prompted.
"But she—I just can't…forgive her." She hung her head in shame. Before he could say anything Caroline continued with a quick explanation. "I know it's not her fault and I try so hard not to blame her, but I'm just so mad all the time." Tears started to fall down her cheeks. Stefan put his arms up to hold her. Caroline continued, sobbing. "She was supposed to be at a sleepover. But she called mom because she wanted to go home. If it wasn't for her—then we wouldn't have been on the road. I know she was only five and it was an accident! I know it, I know, but I can't-can't stop hating her for it. And she knows and I'm a terrible sister." Caroline buried her head against his strong shoulder. She'd never told anyone this and the thought terrified her.
"Caroline—" Stefan's voice was filled with pain for her.
"That's not all." Caroline whispered quietly. "That's not the only reason why." Stefan stayed silent and waited to see if she would continue. She did. "The only homes that would take us together were shit homes. But Elena cried and cried. No matter how much I tried to tell her it would be okay, she begged for me to stay with her. So I did. I had to." Her voice was eerily emotionless as she spoke. "They were bad people. They did things to me." Her voice broke and she lost the will to continue.
"Why didn't you tell?" Stefan asked, shocked.
"They threatened that they would hurt her if I didn't let them—and I was young and stupid and—" Caroline looked down in shame.
Stefan's arms dropped from her shoulders and Caroline's heart dropped. "Why did you stop holding me?" She asked. Her worst fears had come. She finally told someone and they'd been so disgusted with her that they didn't even want to touch her.
She tried to slide off him, but he stopped her. "I didn't know if you wanted me to touch you."
"I don't ever want you to stop." Caroline admitted. Her blue eyes sparkled as she looked at him, but not with tears.
His hands slid down to her waist and he pulled her closer. His voice was tight as he spoke, "Then I won't."
Their lips slid together in the closest thing to a fairy tale kiss that Caroline had ever had. This time when they kissed there were no drugs. No doubts or guilt. Only the feel of each other. It was slow and almost like love. Were people like Caroline capable of love? She wasn't sure, but this seemed damn close. She liked that it wasn't the lust she had for Damon. It was something different, more acute. Almost like comfort, or feeling whole.
They were lying on the couch after, naked and sated. They were watching Looney Toons like lost little children. "Do you think they suspect?" Caroline asked softly.
Stefan knew what she meant right away. "That it's not just weed? No. I know Damon. He'll be in denial until it's right under his nose."
Caroline snuggled her head into his chest, comforted. She gave a delighted laugh when Bugs somehow managed to turn Daffy's own scheme against him yet again. She heard him laugh, too, and her stomach fluttered. She'd made him laugh…
A few minutes later, it was his turn to ask a question. "Where do you think they went, anyway?"
"Probably to drop her off at school." Caroline said carelessly.
Stefan groaned. "Where I should be."
"No use going now," Caroline purred as her fingers reflexively tightened on his muscles. "You've already missed half the day."
Stefan relaxed. "You're right. But Damon doesn't have work today. He could come home at any minute." Stefan sounded worried.
Caroline crawled until her face was level with his. "So let's live every second like it's our last." Her mouth dropped to his and he kissed her back immediately.
His hands went to her blonde hair to hold her in place as he gave back as good as he got.
Elena yawned and stretched before she even opened her eyes. On of her hands curled around something feathery while the other came to rest on something warm and firm. Slowly, the sense of where she was started to return. She opened her eyes to see one hand was around the base of Damon's neck, the feathery substance his soft black hair.
Her eyes snapped open when she realized that her other hand was nestled innocently in his lap. She felt something move underneath her palm and hastily withdrew her hand. Cheeks ablaze, she looked at Damon for any sign of waking. With a sigh of relief, she started to ease away from him on the couch.
She looked at the TV. The screen was dark. He must have watched the movie until the end, and then gotten up to turn it off. And then he'd returned to her on the couch… She felt her insides grow fuzzy. Her eyes slowly drifted across the room. She finally found the clock.
Fuck! She all but ran to the bathroom as her second adrenaline rush of the day kicked her in the face. She was going to be late for school.
After the world's quickest humanly possible shower she stepped out and realized she had no clothes and no towel. She spared only a glance for the dirty pile on the floor. No way was she putting those on again. She bit her lip and decided to make a run for it. Damon was probably still asleep anyway.
Damon waited until she was in the shower to open his eyes. He sighed deeply and adjusted himself. He'd felt her stir when she started to wake, and he definitely felt where her hand had landed. Being the sick, sick pervert he was, he didn't even try to move it. And he sure as hell didn't try to not feel it, as a gentleman would've. He just let himself respond and feigned sleep.
He was stuck somewhere between amusement and apprehension.
She certainly wasn't helping matters. He'd just been about to get something to eat when Elena came rushing out of the shower and slammed into him. They fell backwards with her on top. And she was naked. And wet. His eyes almost rolled into the back of his head when his pants grew wet from where she landed on him and the hard-on he'd been fighting since last night roared to life.
He pretended to cough so he wouldn't have to say anything. Unsure what to do, he just put his hand over his eyes and stayed there sprawled out on the floor. But that didn't do anything to rid him of the glistening, full-body view he'd just gotten.
A few minutes later, he heard Elena approach him. His hand was still covering his eyes and he was still lying where she'd knocked him. She laughed nervously and he smiled. "I'm, uh, decent."
Damon scissored his fingers to peer up at her, as if he didn't quite trust her. He couldn't rid himself of the smile that had been on his face since the most fortuitous event had happened. It grew broader when he saw she was still blushing madly. He removed his hand altogether and sat up. "I'm going to take a shower, too. Don't worry, I'll be quick."
He grabbed his set of spare clothes from Caroline's room and showered even faster than she had. Nothing was ever said of the incident and for that Elena was truly appreciative.
Even though they were running late, Damon made very sure to drive carefully and calmly. Elena noticed and was absurdly grateful. How did he always know the exact perfect thing to do? Whether it was making her feel better or saving her from embarrassment. She still blushed as she remembered her stupidity. And he'd just stayed there with a silly little smile on his face, not saying anything. She smiled shyly at him as he drove because she knew he wouldn't see.
Students were lined up in front of the school to get on a bus. "Didn't school just start?" Damon asked.
"Field trip to the zoo. Which I just happen to be signed up for. Thanks, Damon, I got here right on time!" Elena hurried out of the car and towards her science teacher.
Damon followed at a slower pace.
"What are you doing, Damon?" Elena glanced back at him in confusion.
"I just want to talk to your teacher to make sure she knows it's not your fault we were late." Damon explained.
"You don't have to do that," Elena said, but she was touched that he'd care to.
"What happened to that government homework?" Damon asked suspiciously.
"The bus gets back before last hour so we still have to go, and gov's my last class." Elena turned to her teacher.
Before she could even get a word in, her frantic bio teacher was upon her. "Elena! Where have you been? We almost left without you, but Ms. Curie hasn't even come yet. That flake of a Home Ec teacher! We were supposed to be gone ten minutes ago! I don't even know why I invited her to be a chaperone in the first place! Interdepartmental Cooperation my ass! Oh, sorry dear, pardon my language," Mrs. Somers was about to continue her rant when she caught sight of Damon. "You must be Elena's brother! How old are you?"
Damon looked taken aback. He glanced at Elena for guidance, but the young girl shrugged. Mrs. Somers was like a force of nature. You just stepped back and let her wreak her havoc. "Twenty-three, Mrs.—"
Elena's teacher ignored the invitation to an introduction. "Oh, could I ask you an enormous favor? We are short one chaperone, and I simply can't take the kids with just myself. Would you consider joining us at the zoo?"
Elena's mouth dropped open as her teacher got right to it. "He might have work—" Elena tried to save Damon before he got roped into something.
"No, it's fine. I'm off on Thursdays. What would I have to do?" Damon seemed determined to take on this responsibility and Elena was nonplussed.
"Absolutely nothing!" Mrs. Somers assured. "They're all over 16, they shouldn't be any problem at all. It's just a legal issue that I can't leave if I have a certain chaperone to student ratio."
"All right." Damon agreed and just like that he was on the bus next to Elena as they started the bumpy journey to the zoo.
It felt wrong to her to have him next to her. He'd graciously allowed her the window seat, but Elena couldn't get passed the weirdness factor. He was an adult. He didn't belong in trivial high school world. And her brother? Really? Elena shook her head.
Damon sat there the whole time with a smile on his face. He remembered how much he'd enjoyed field trips when he was young. His mom would pack him a lunch with an extra cookie and his dad would sign the slip and pat him on the shoulder. He couldn't remember one trip after they'd died, though he was sure he didn't go through high school without taking one. He made himself a promise that he'd remember this one.
After a while he looked at Elena. It seemed odd that she would be so quiet. Maybe she was mad at him for inviting himself along. "I haven't been on a bus since…" Damon smiled.
Elena looked at him for the first time since the ride had started. "You seem like you're enjoying it." His enjoyment made her smile.
"Nostalgia." He said with a twist of his eyebrows. "The good kind."
"I'm glad," Elena said genuinely.
"So, you aren't upset I invited myself along?" Damon questioned tentatively.
"Are you kidding?" Elena laughed. "My teacher all but held you at gunpoint."
He was shocked into silence for a moment.
She went pale and her whole face transformed with guilt. "Oh, my God, Damon, I am so sorry. I didn't even think. God, I am so stupid!" Her throat constricted and her eyes started to feel wet.
Damon just sat there with his mouth open. He started to laugh.
Elena was perplexed. Had she caused some sort of mental breakdown? "Damon?"
"It's-it's funny." He tried to contain his laughter and succeeded, somewhat. "I mean, it's not funny, but it is. You know?"
She shook her head. "I'm really sorry." She said it again for good measure. She needed him to know she meant it.
"I think that's the first time I've thought about what happened to her and felt okay, Elena." Damon sounded confused. The notion was mind-boggling. Acceptance, he thought, this is what that feels like. He looked at Elena. It was because of her.
"I'm sor—" she started.
Damon put a finger to her lips. "Say it again and I may decide to throw you in the alligator pit when we get there."
Elena smiled and bit his finger lightly. She held it in her mouth for a moment and ran her tongue across it as she remembered he had. His mouth parted and his eyes darkened. She almost sucked it deeper into her mouth before she remembered where she was and let go instead. She looked away and blushed.
"Inappropriate behavior for a brother and sister." Damon agreed.
Elena couldn't believe her ears and was shocked speechless.
He threw a careless arm over her shoulder and tugged her close. "As siblings, I'd say we're closer than some."
She went willingly enough, but all the while she wondered what she was doing. In no way was this right. But then she had a strange thought. Nothing they'd done had felt wrong. It had just felt…good.
She let herself smile. "Can we see the leopards, first, big brother?" She blinked innocent eyes up at him and made her voice soft.
He instantly got hard and looked away. He grimaced for just a second at his own depravity before replying. "Of course, babygirl." He looked down at her and winked. The game was on.
They did see the leopards, then the monkeys, and then the penguins. She liked the way they slipped in and swam and the way they waddled when they walked.
But her favorite was the African exhibit. They got to the crocodiles and Damon picked her up around her waist and pretended to throw her in until she reminded through her laughter that he'd said alligator, not crocodile. He set her down to see some kids from their school staring strangely at them, but she could care less.
The elephants always seemed so sad to her. Maybe it was the slow way they moved. She told Damon she planned on going to Africa someday. And she'd ride an elephant. He listened with interest and didn't laugh.
He seemed to like the giraffes a lot. "Look at those tongues," he said with a smile. He moved behind her and put an arm around her waist to point out where one was grabbing leaves from the topmost branches of the tree nearest to it.
Elena didn't have eyes for the creature, though. Instead, she looked at the arm around her and wished she had the courage to place her hand over his where it rested at her stomach.
Later, she'd dragged him to the hippos by the elbow. He seemed surprised that she was so interested in them. "They're very territorial." She told Damon with excitement. "They're the number one cause of death by animal attack in Africa." She watched one swim through the clear glass tank. "Look how it dives," she breathed. "Would you ever have guessed an animal that looked like that would be so graceful in the water?" She smiled.
Damon wasn't much into hippos, but he loved the way her eyes lit up when she watched them.
They were walking towards the nocturnal exhibit when Elena stumbled over a hose that led to a sprinkler. She almost fell flat on her face, but Damon caught her. They shared a moment where they looked into each other's eyes. Then she smiled and looked down and they'd started walking again.
But somehow his hand found hers and neither let go until it was time to meet back up with the group.
On the bus ride back, they didn't sit close. Maybe it was paranoia that the others could see how they looked at each other. Maybe it was guilt for the stolen intimacy they'd shared while in the wild confines of the zoo.
But that didn't stop her from putting her hand flat on the seat next to her thigh. And it didn't stop Damon from putting his hand next to his thigh. Their pinkies slowly found each other until they overlapped.