Two updates in a half hour, wheee!

Warnings: Slashy if you want to read it like that, but could easily just be the consequences of drunk!Screamer.

Continuity: G1

Enjoy~

-9- Drinking ~If I /ever/ suggest this again, do just shoot me instead; it would hurt less.~

"Eighty-nine bottles of beer on the wall, eighty-nine bottles of beeeeeeeeeeeer..." Skywarp sang, his fifth cube of high grade slightly tilted in his right hand. Starscream looked up at his trinemate and scowled.

"If you don't stop singing that inane fleshbag drinking song, that cube is going straight where you won't want it."

"Who says I don't want it, Scree?" Skywarp said, giggling. Starscream facepalmed. 'Cons were /not/ supposed to giggle, no matter /how/ overcharged they got. He reached up and plucked the cube from Skywarp's only slightly resisting grasp and set it on his desk, ignoring the kicked turbopuppy look his youngest trinemate was giving him.

"Stars, you really ought to try getting overcharged every now an' then." Skywarp said with only a hint of slur to his tone. "Might get that pole out of your aft, or something."

"I don't have a pole in my aft. I have a sense of responsibility, a sense of propriety, and a thousand things that need doing." Starscream snapped, unaccountably irritated for some reason. "Not to mention it's a waste of fuel."

"Not when I stole it from those fragging Twins' hidden still in that cave." Skywarp said with a blinding grin on his face.

"You did /what/?"

"Stole it. VOIP! In, grabbed the goods, and VOIP back out. They'll never even know who took it, an' I got more." Skywarp gestured behind him, where sixteen cubes of the Terror Twins' best brew sat, glowing softly in the dim light of the trine's shared quarters. "Waitin' on TeeCee to get offshift, then I'm gonna get him 'charged too." The grin on Skywarp's face was almost cute.

Starscream sighed inwardly. 'Cons were not supposed to be cute, either. Skywarp tended to break all those rules, though, simply because he was Skywarp. He glanced at the teleporter, who gave him a Look that practically begged Starscream to do it, just this once.

The SIC groaned and held out a hand. "Fine. But only one."

Skywarp beamed. "It's good stuff, those twins may be aftheads but they sure do know their brewing..." Skywarp handed Starscream a cube and nearly bounced on his thrusters, waiting for his trineleader's assessment of its quality.

Starscream sipped...and then took a much bigger drink. "This is...really good. Smooth. I haven't had anything like this in awhile." Most of the fuel onboard was strictly midgrade, and barely that. Energon obtained from coal power tasted like slag, and that from hydroelectric sources was almost as bad. It was a lot better than nothing, though, so most 'Cons just drank up and didn't complain about where their fuel came from.

By the time that Thundercracker got offshift, both of his trinemates had depleted the stack of sixteen cubes down to seven. The Air Commander was sitting on Skywarp's lap, legs slung to the side, a cube of glowing violet liquid in his hand and a huge grin on his lips.

"Heya, TeeCee." Starscream said, gesturing with his cube. Some sloshed over the side onto Skywarp's face, and he dragged a finger through it as if it were some strange substance he'd never seen before.

"Didn't need a bath, Screamer!" Skywarp said.

"Don' call me that, Warpy." Starscream said, almost giggling.

Thundercracker just stared. The world was coming to an end, he just knew it.