Even after all this time, it's hard to comprehend that my good looks are gone, truly gone, and will never be coming back. I sighed wearily, finally putting my brush down in resignation. Women will never turn their heads again when I pass by. That was the basis of my identity and self-worth for my entire life. And since it's gone, what is my identity now? Who am I? If the sight of my rotting, decaying flesh doesn't send them running, then surely the associated smells will.

I felt a playful blow of breath in my ear. I offered a tight lipped smile and waved in the mirror. "Thanks, girlie," I whispered, knowing who it is even though she's invisible when not in her bodily form. Annabel and I share an acute understanding of each other's pain, as vanity was our undoing both in life and in death. She is more deserving of sympathy, however, as she died in her attempts to please only the man she loved. My death occurred when the wrong woman discovered that she had never been the only one.

I rose from my mirror, restless for a distraction, and shifted into my spirit form as I went downstairs. I should do a walk around the park. Fortunately, watching happy families tends to cheer me up, not make me jealous. The park tends to run pretty smoothly by itself, but we all like to do our own safety checks on the rides, and also use whatever influence we have to make the Six Flags experience more enjoyable for our guests. I smiled inwardly as I remembered sending that gust of wind to knock off a security guard's hat at just the right time and in just the right direction to finally get his attention. An especially obnoxious group of teenagers was finally ejected from the park without a refund for line cutting.

I was about to pass through the wall to the outside when Johnny came running toward me, grabbing my arm and doubling over in laughter. Hiding my annoyance, I waited for him to catch his breath, although the corners of my mouth began to turn upward despite myself. "What is it, man?"

Johnny attempted to take deep breaths and held his side, eventually managing, "Billasty, someone—or a group of people—turned all the direction signs every which way in the park. People are standing there with their maps, trying desperately to figure out where they're going, while staff members are drawing it out for them. But whoever did that must have also done the other prank—they put up five Free Parking Today signs all along the driveway to the park!" He wheezed again, overcome with mirth, oblivious to my tense body language. "The Board will only be mildly annoyed and embarrassed about the directional signs, but they can't false advertise, so now they've just lost $25 per car all day long! Thousands and thousands of dollars! They must be seething with wrath!"

I glanced behind me and, as bad luck would have it, saw Ghoulmaster sitting in a far corner, working on one of his undisclosed projects. He sat rigidly, absorbing this news, a muscle jerking angrily in his jaw. "We'll assess the situation, Ghoulmaster," I said, a bit too confidently, and pulled Johnny out of the house with me and into the sunny, slightly chilly New Jersey September air.

"Walk with me," I hissed, almost dragging him past Batman the Ride. "In a few minutes, I will also see the humor in this situation, but right now I have to enlighten you about why you should never, ever, ever joke about a subject matter like this in Ghoulmaster's presence again."

"What? Why? What did I do now?" he almost whined. I still instinctively walked around the mortals, but he carelessly passed through them without even turning his head, which is what he must have done when he came to his jaywalking demise. He ran his hand through his hair in exasperation at my words. I softened toward him, stopping in front of Skull Mountain and putting a hand on each of his arms briefly to turn him to face me. Johnny would never admit his vulnerability, but despite his tough talk and aloof exterior, I could tell that he didn't want to seriously offend any of us. Or our unspoken house culture.

"Sorry, I'll start over," I began, not wanting Johnny on the defensive. "Ghoulmaster has just a few subjects that we've found tend to make him a little touchy. If you're brave, you can mention them in all seriousness and at the right time, but the rest of us tread very softly or not at all. Really, though-Ghoulmaster loves this park. It's the meaning that he's created out of this…wandering existence that we're all in." I squeezed my eyes shut briefly.

When I opened them, Johnny stood in front of me, an understanding look on his face. Now this was a subject that we all discussed only on very good or very bad days. The fact was, there was an awful lot about this strange afterlife existence that we all didn't know. Most people who die are no longer walking on this earth, but those of us who do, have no idea why. We can't fly and we don't have many special powers. Those of us who are foolish enough to attract the attention of mortals, also attract the attention of the mortal hunters, who know how to swiftly and easily send us into the "next" realm…but, as we have no idea exactly what kind of world that might be, we all do the same thing we did during life: wander.

I continued. "All I'm saying is, don't joke about the safety of this park. You've only been with us a couple of months now, so I guess nothing like this has ever come up. Speak about the park respectfully, be very careful what you say about the guests, things like that."

Johnny eyed me suspiciously, then decided to bring up what was on his mind. "What does Ghoulmaster think of me?"

"He likes you fine. I'm sure you've noticed that he tends to only speak when he really has something to say. He's not much for pep talks, but trust me, he's fiercely loyal, and…he's someone I'm proud to be in this kind of arrangement with."

Johnny shifted uncomfortably, probably not used to serious conversations. "This is a very strange arrangement. I can't believe I signed a contract, acknowledging to obey without question or hesitation, even agreeing to submit to whatever punishment he deems necessary if I slip up. I'm just trying this out for a while, seeing if you guys really have something special going on here or not."

"Obviously, I think we do. But we've had plenty of people come and go over the years as well, and it's your choice. The second you opt out, Ghoulmaster will give you your...collateral…back, and you'll be free to go." I shudder involuntarily at the thought of that collateral getting into the wrong hands. I would only ever trust Ghoulmaster with mine. It was a condition getting into this house that he take each of ours and put it in a secret location, as a symbol of our trust and commitment. "Anyway…" a smile played at the corner of my lips…"You may be the jokester of the house now, but you're still a breath of fresh air to Ghoulmaster after the twenty-one years we spent with Raven Stone."