Authors Note- Haven't updated in forever, I just threw this chapter together, I hope it isn't TOO bad...)
Jude stared at the ground beneath his feet, trying to comprehend what Max had just said. Lucy had already been sick, and now Max; his best friend.
"I..uh--" Jude responded running his hand through the messy hair on his head.
"You don't have to say anything, I just needed to tell somebody, you know-- get it off my chest." Max walked over to the kitchen and reached into the wooden cupboard, pulling out a half full bottle of vodka.
"Do you really need that right now mate?" Jude covered the top of the bottle with his palm and looked at Max sympathetically. "This stuff is not going to help anything." He added screwing the lid back on.
Max sighed heavily and rubbed the temples of his forehead, anxiously tapping the heel of his foot against the tiled floor.
"I know you're just trying to help Jude, but don't be a fucking hypocrite." Max replied angrily.
"What are you talking about Max, I'm a fucking hypocrite? How?"
"When Lucy and you weren't on good terms you used to drink yourself into oblivion, somebody would have to carry you into your fucking bed at night!" Max snickered, he swiftly grabbed the bottle of vodka once again and plopped down on the couch.
"That's not fair Max! I wasn't drinking and taking pills! That mix could do you in anyday, I just don't want my best mate to die, alright!" Jude shouted defensively.
"Yeah, whatever." Max sighed not wanting to listen any longer.
"I'll be back later." Jude stated before walking out the door, slamming it behind him.
Listening to the rain slowly trickle down the window, Max thought about things, all sorts of things about his life. Leaning over, he reached underneath the couch, pulling out a torn up, thick journal. This journal was where Max kept all his secrets and thoughts. Lucy had gotten him started on it, he never liked talking about his problems, so she told him to get it out on paper. At first Max thought the idea was fucking idiotic, it seemed like something only a girl would do. Of course that wasn't true, and he realized that, he figured if he were to die at a random moment, somebody could read his journal and solve the mystery of his death or something. Underneath Max knew that wasn't really the reason he wrote, the truth was, he really did like to document his life, go back and read about a moment in the past which he had forgotten.
Max was feeling shitty, and if he couldn't pass out to forget about it, he would write about how shitty he felt.
December 12, 1967
Sometimes I think about how my life would have been without the drugs, would have it been slower, faster, or just as fucking painful. Either way, there's nothing I can do now, I'm hooked. Lucy and Jude are worried about me, I know that, but how I am supposed to explain to them that every time I slip the sharp tip of the syringe into my skin, I get fucking relief. I can feel the morphine run through my veins, up, down and all around my body, until I don't feel anything anymore. There is nothing like it, no other substitute, not even sex, and wow, that is hard to say.
"I know what you do." Max caught glimpse of Lucy standing by the kitchen door, he closed the notebook and sunk further into the couch.
"Excuse me, and what is that I do?" Max replied in a sarcastic tone, even though he was really nervous about what Lucy was thinking.
"The drugs Max, the fucking drugs. I heard everything, the conversation between Jude and you, why couldn't you just tell me? I'm your sister. We always tell each other everything." Lucy replied, tears slowing falling down her cheeks.
"I'm sorry Luce, I just..." Max slowly replied, trying to think of a clear answer. "I didn't want to burden you with all my shit. You have enough problems of your own."
"You never burden me, you're my older brother, and my best friend. I love you, and I'm going to help you get through this." Lucy wrapped her arms around Max's thin body, he was getting weaker by the day. Lucy had never seen Max like this, so vulnerable and fragile, it wasn't like him at all, she wanted the old Max back, her brother.
(Yeah, it sucked guys, I'm sorry ( )