"Justin, I know you, you're a smart, reasonable and compassionate man... Surely you understand my needs. I have to be on my own with my family. I'm sure my mother will agree with me and you should offer to leave instead of having her tell you so." "Sami, I hear what you are saying, but considering the circumstances, I am not sure Marlena thinks that removing us and leaving Will without the support our family can give him is such a good idea. I'd rather talk about this with her." "So, you will listen to her opinion before mine?" "This is her home, Sami and..." Justin is looking in Will's direction. He looks torn between helping him against his own mother and saying something unkind that might hurt Sami but also Will. I get up and pull Will's hand. "Hello, Sami, we'll leave you and dad to talk. Where are the kids?" "On the beach with EJ... No, Will, I want to talk to you! I'm sure Sonny can go on his own."
I feel a sharp pain in my chest, as if my heart was aching. I don't want to let him alone with her, not this time. She might be back but she's still on the defensive. The sirens of the sea are still howling for him somewhere. He looks at me and he turns to her "Mom, I'm breathing again now you're back, but our relationship need to heal in a healthy way. Since I'm the one who was wounded, I'll call the shots." "Will, I am your mother!" "And you failed me..." He turns again and I see he's about to cry. I gesture a signal to my dad. Sami sees our pantomime, but before she can react, Justin has taken her elbow and is leading her to the living-room.
I go open the window, to let him space to compose himself. The air is cold with the wind blowing hard and I see the ribbons pass by me. "Look Will, they're flying their kite again."
Sydney holds a shell in her hand. It's a little broken but she looks at it as if it's a rare opal. Will helps her find others. They look so much alike, both spontaneous spirits, both fragile and precious.
Sonny is there, not far. He's helping Johnny pilot the kite against the gust of wind. If the kite is shredded, he'll be so sad. It's not important, and yet it is to this little boy. I look at the dragon, fierce and fiery, flapping noisily. It is an inch away from being torn but it's resisting. Like me.
Syd lays down her treasure on the sand. We compose a drawing for mom to see later. She has her eyes, exactly. Sonny kneels next to us and starts gushing. Sydney is a fountain of joy. "Your brother and you make a great team, honey." She smiles at him like I can't, a smile only the sun could rival. But it's my hands he takes and my fingers he grazes. And his smile is almost as bright as her, if it weren't for the worry I can feel in it.
EJ walks back to us. He looks happy "So, William, you should go talk to your mother now." "I will EJ, but later." He pinches his lip "I'd rather you go now." I feel Sony's hand clamp mine, but I'm the one who answers, I have to regain control "Thanks for your concern EJ, I'd rather she cools off first." "I talked to her a lot, yesterday. She'll make the effort, I'm sure." I look away, at the sea and its invisible depths "I don't want it to be an effort. I just want her to love me like before." EJ stops talking.
The moment is over, we let EJ and the children behind. We walk on the shore till we can't see the house anymore. The rocks are slippery, like cold marble. Our legs mingle, our breathings are short. He falls into a puddle and I start laughing. I can't stop.
To see him laughing, I would conquer mountains. I would learn how to play the piano and play it badly. I would fall a thousand times. As long as he doesn't fall. I want this laugh, I want him. I get up and hold him tight. We kiss with an urgency, an ugliness, even, that frightens me. Will he survive it? Will I?
My self-control is in pieces, while his is fully back. His hands are nervous and alert, moving in a spiral around my jacket. I might fall again. He pauses, to take a breath, but doesn't let me go and I feel as light and free as I did before we met. I have found my dreams in his embrace, my world to roam into in his eyes. Even now as they have dark blue waves of passion tainting them, they are pure and wonderful. I start kissing his nose, his eyelids, his chin. I drink his beauty to make it mine.
My cell rings. Our bodies jerk and separate as I wriggle on my legs to keep standing. It's my mom. Lunch is ready and she can't find us. I tell him and we walk back to the road to stop slipping. He races me. I don't let him win. He bumps into me, hard, the vibrations reverberating inside of me. We have one last look before we go inside the house and it's as simple as a scribble on a notebook. It says 'Tonight.'