A.N. Again, short chapter, for which I apologise. But at least it's quick. Hmm. Short and quick. I could make a really dirty joke out of that.
Disclaimer: The goddess apparently only gives happy endings to heroes, not the characters who work their arses off every day of their miserable lives to be good. Sometimes, as much as it pains me to admit, you just have to say 'Screw canon!'.
Lily was very anxious not to be late. If Potter thought she had stood him up he'd probably accidentally kill Severus. Or maybe not. Not accidentally, that is. She picked out a nice black skirt and white top. After hesitating, she stowed Severus' shirt under her pillow. Then she grabbed a pair of sliver wedges, brushed her hair and did her makeup. She glanced at herself in the mirror as she left. She looked like a porcelain doll. The thought made her want to vomit.
She set off for the village, holding herself back from kicking rocks due to the fact she was in sandals. Potter was waiting just where he had said he would. She was disturbed to see he was holding a red rose in his teeth. When she approached, he held it out of her. She took it, then stared at it. 'What do I do with it now?' she asked. Potter frowned. 'How the hell should I know? It's a flower, you're a girl. My part's done'. She shrugged and put it in her handbag. Potter looked disconcerted by this, but carried on 'Shall we go in?' he asked charmingly, offering his arm. Lily took it and was led into the restaurant. It was, as she had feared, extremely upmarket. They were seated by the maitre'd at a table which overlooked the village through a large window. Lily groaned, counting four different forks.
Potter was already ordering the wine. Lily frowned when the bottle was bought. 'I don't like red' she stated as Potter poured her a glass. 'Of course you do' he insisted 'It's the same colour as your hair'. Lily supposed that explained the rose too. 'Shall I order?' he asked and had sent the waiter away before she could object. She shook her head. 'What just happened?' she asked, bemused. 'I ordered for you' he told her proudly 'It's romantic'. Lily took a deep, calming breath. 'And just what did you order for me?' she asked. 'Escargot' he smiled 'House speciality'.
Lily stared at him blankly. 'Snails. You want me to eat snails'. His smile faltered 'Um, why? Don't you like snails? They have garlic butter'. Lily said in a very restrained voice 'No. I don't like eating garden pests. Garlic butter or not. And I don't like things just because they're the colour of my hair. I don't like frogs, and they're the colour of my eyes'. Potter bit his lip. 'So do I take it to mean you won't want the starter?' he asked, as a plate of frogs' legs was placed with a flourish in front of them. Lily closed her eyes, counted to ten, then snapped her fingers for a waiter. 'Oui, Mademoiselle?' one asked, stepping forwards. Lily turned to Potter. 'Potter…' he cut her off. 'No, no, Evans, we're on a date. It's James'. Lily frowned. 'Right…James, you want this to be a good date for me, yes?' he nodded sincerely 'Of course'.
'Great. Ok, garcon, clear this crap away. I'm not eating anything that lives on the bottom of a pond. Go out and bring us a takeaway pizza' she demanded. James gaped at her. 'These are the most expensive things on the menu! You can't eat pizza here!' he fumed. Lily raised an eyebrow. 'I can and will, James. You want a good dinner companion, you date a Pureblood girl, not a Muggleborn. I'm not like them; you can't just throw money at me and expect me to fall at your feet'. James spluttered indignantly at her, insisting he would never think such a thing, but still looked a little green as the waiter reapperated with a large cardboard box.
Lily happily tore a piece from the circle of pizza and swallowed it in barely four bites. 'God, I was starving, aren't you?' she reached for another. James shook his head mutely, glancing at the other diners who looked discreetly scandalised. 'So, Potter' said Lily with her mouth full 'Tell me about yourself'. James looked relieved. 'Well, I'm the only son of the Potter family, sole heir to a rather sizeable fortune' he halted when he saw her look 'Ok, ok, I'm Gryffindor seeker, no brothers or sisters, brilliant at everything, and remember, it's James, you'll be screaming it later. You?'. Lily rolled her eyes at his arrogance. 'One older sister, hate flying, pretty good at potions and charms. I've only known I was a witch since I was ten; that was when I met Sev'.
James glowered at his name. When Lily had finished the pizza, throwing her crusts back, he smiled. 'I haven't screwed up with dessert, trust me' he said confidently, gesturing to a waiter. He came bearing a gigantic sundae of strawberry ice-cream with two spoons. 'Like your hair' he beamed. Lily scowled, stood and left. James stared at the mound of ice-cream, wondering what he had done wrong now.
Lily was waiting for him outside. 'What was that?' he demanded 'Why did you storm out?'. Lily glared at him. 'This is no fun' she frowned. James threw his hands up. 'Fine! We'll do what you want to do. What do you normally do on dates?'. Lily looked confused. 'Normally? What do you mean?'. James sighed. 'Normally. What is your most common course of action on a date?'. Lily appeared to think. 'I don't go on a lot of dates' she admitted 'They're boring'. 'Right' said James determinedly 'Then what's fun?'. Lily shrugged 'Whatever I feel like doing'. James clenched his teeth 'And what do you feel like doing?' he asked. Lily's eyes lit up. 'I want to go swimming in the lake' she decided.
James shook his head. 'Don't be bloody ridiculous. It's cold, it's dark, and it's dangerous. I tell you what, I'll show you the shrieking shack' he grabbed her hand and dragged her towards the rickety building. They walked in silence in the darkness along the rough road, James repeatedly trying to pull her closer and Lily squirming from his grasp as far as he would let her until they reached the squat wooden building.
'Are you scared?' he asked in what he thought was a kindly voice 'Don't worry, I'll protect you'. Lily pushed his arms off her. 'I'm not scared' she said angrily 'And I certainly don't need protecting. You're acting like a Jane Austin hero. I'm not going to faint, I'm not going to flutter my eyelashes, and I'm not impressed. I've seen the real you, and this isn't it'. James looked put out. 'I don't know what to do with you' he shouted. 'I did everything right. You should be smitten by now'. Lily replied coldly 'Well, maybe I'm just not your type. I hear Narcissa Black's free'.
James rolled his eyes. 'Look, you're attracted to me, right? Of course you are, you're female. So just shut the hell up and kiss me'. Lily jerked her head back as he leaned in. 'Evans' he growled 'It's not a proper date unless there's at the very least a goodnight kiss. Or do you want me to keep playing with Snivellus? I can be a bit of an animal sometimes' he chuckled at a joke Lily didn't understand. He was pressing her against the fence that surrounded the shack, his arms either side of her waist. With no choice, great reluctance, and a touch of fear, Lily met his lips, intending on only a brief peck. Unfortunately for her, James grasped the back of her head and kept her pressed to him as he explored her mouth, his other hand roaming dangerously low.
Eventually James pulled away, slightly disappointed. 'You're not as good a kisser as I expected' he said rudely. Lily was wiping her mouth disgustedly, gasping for breath. 'That was my first kiss' she explained, scowling up at him. James looked startled. 'That can't have been your first kiss, you're gorgeous'. Lily glared at him 'It was. I'm just not like you or Black'. To her surprise, he broke into a wide grin. 'I was your first kiss!' he crowed 'Wow. So you liked that? Anything you're curious about trying?' he waggled his eyebrows. Lily kept her dignity. 'No, thank you, James. I'd quite like to go back to the castle now'.
James nodded 'Of course, of course. Got to take it slowly with someone like you. We'll arrange a second date tomorrow, ok? Day of the big match! You can come and support me'. Lily rolled her eyes 'Great. Lucky me'. James missed the sarcasm. 'Yeah, there's loads of girls who'd kill to be my official girlfriend. You'll have to watch your back, some of them can get a bit jealous'. Lily wasn't sure about either of those statements, but played along. If he wanted to think it was worth not pressuring her because she was going to be there for the long term, that was fine by her. James escorted her back to her dormitory like a perfect gentlemen, kissing her lightly on the cheek at the stairs. Lily was slightly mollified until she realised he was staring pretty blatantly down her top.
A.N. I seem to be churning out really shit endings. It's probably because I wrote the story first, then started hacking it up into chapters. Anyway, next chapter is one of those it's M rated for. I don't think I made James bad enough, though. I have enough personal experience of rude arrogant bastards to write him, I just didn't want to subject Lily to it.