"So you're saying it was a mouse that started it all?" said Daria.
"Yes. Definitely a mouse," said Sandi, now reduced to only one person. "I remember Tiffany and me meeting Fluffy on the back porch. Fluffy had killed a blue mouse and brought it to us. Then Fluffy sneezed all over us! It was really gross and then Tiffany started sneezing because she was allergic and – "
"A blue mouse?" said Daria. It was starting to come together.
"Tiffany." It was Jane speaking. "Where's Tiffany now?"
"Gee, I don't know," said Sandi. "I think she's been a bit under the weather, like, she's allergic to cats and stuff…."
"Great! All this weird stuff happened to you, a blue mouse coming from God knows where? Do you even know what happened to the mouse?"
"Huh?" said Sandi. "I had Dad throw it away!"
Daria interrupted. "And Tiffany. You and Tiffany were exposed to the same stimulus and you never even bothered to compare notes or anything?"
Sandi shrank. "Well…I…uh…."
Moron! "Well, Quinn, I hope you're happy with the addition of brainpower to the Legion. I'm getting tired of doing the heavy lifting around here."
"Ohmigod!" Quinn looked as if she'd been slapped. "Tiffany hasn't been in school for days!"
AHHHHHHH oh my GOD oh my GOD SHE'S DEAD Tiffany oh my GOD !!!
Daria clenched her teeth. Then an audible "ahhHHH!!" escaped her lips in panic as she pointed behind the seated Quinn and Sandi.
Each of the girls turned. The sight behind them caused Sandi to swoon. Quinn, quite brave during the fight with Bellard, dived away from the table, stumbling to her feet in the cramped trailer.
"Helloooo…." It was Tiffany. "Can someone…help…?"
Tiffany was semi-material. Daria and Jane could look right through her, looking to the other side.
Daria grabbed Sandi, and spun her around, almost hiding behind her. "THAT'S what I'm talking about!!"
"Oh shit…" mumbled Sandi.
Tiffany reached out, as if trying to find something solid. She walked right through the table where the four had been sitting.
"Is she going to kill us?" moaned Quinn.
Daria tried desperately to read Tiffany's mind.
…so tired no food can't walk can't call help me fading away will die too tired Daria help me….
Daria tried to cast her thoughts, holding her fear at bay. The wrist monitor pinged into action. The Ping of Death.
-- Tiffany. Tiffany, are you alive? --
…can't get solid…can't feel anything….
-- Tiffany! You have to trust us! --
…must sl-eeeeeepppp…. Tiffany was starting to fade further and further away. Daria didn't know what she would do if Tiffany completely faded into nothingness.
--Tiffany, you have to try! Come back!--
…can't try…. Even the mental voice was getting weaker.
I'm going to disappear…helllllp meeeeee
-- Tiffany, if you can't hang on I can't help you -- !! -
…Goddddd….g-g-goinggggg…tooooo…d-dieeeee…
-- STOP IT TIFFANY DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE STOP IT RIGHT NOW GET SOLID RIGHT NOW!!! --
Something snapped on in Tiffany's hind brain. She obeyed. She immediately materialized into solidity. Tired, and exhausted, Tiffany's brain gave out and she collapsed unconsciously to the trailer floor.
Daria fell backwards, landing on the floor rear-end first. The three other frightened girls retreated from the safety on the other room and ran forward to see what was happening.
184/102. Dammit, Trent…where are you…I could use you…. Daria pulled herself to her feet.
"Daria, your monitor's still pinging!" said Jane.
"Never mind that, Jane. Tiffany might run out of pings sooner that I do!"
Quinn and Sandi had both run to help Tiffany. Sandi was desperately trying to wipe the make-up off Tiffany's face with her bare hands. Quinn was watching carefully for any signs of life.
"I think…she's alive!!"
"Good!" said Daria. "Get her some water. Get Dr. Burchell down here right away, Jane…because if Tiffany starts fading out again, I'm going to have to stay here and bring her back until we can figure this out…and I don't figure I have the strength for that."
"Anything else I can get you?" said Jane.
"Mountain Dew…and lots of it!!"
(la la LA la la)
Each of the trailers had a bedroom. The four carried Tiffany to one of the beds and quickly put her under the covers. The two other Fashion Club members wiped Tiffany's makeup away and cleaned the grime off Tiffany that she had been unable to wash away.
"Gee, what a mess," muttered Jane, watching Quinn and Sandi work from the door.
"The stack keeps getting higher and higher," said Daria, turning away. Jane followed her.
"Do you have any ideas?" said Jane.
"I'm going to stay here with Tiffany, I suppose. Quinn can make up something to tell Mom and Dad."
"Why you?"
Daria sighed. "I doubt we'll be talking computers and public policy. All I know if that if Tiffany starts to fade away, I might be able to calm her down to the point where she can be solid again."
"Or maybe she can learn how to control it, somehow."
"Right. And you know that Tiffany has the perfect teacher. I'm still afraid that I'm going to have a stroke."
A thought crossed Daria's mind. "Trent. Do you think that Trent could come over here?"
"Hmmm," smiled Jane, "you, Trent, a fully stocked trailer, maybe some sweet music…."
"Not if Trent brings his guitar. Seriously. What is Trent doing right now?"
"Let's see. It's after 2PM. So he's probably asleep."
"We need Trent over here. Because right now, we've got too much going on and we can't keep our fingers on all the buttons."
"Well," said Jane, "Dawn Hall didn't seem to mind. I need to order three more trailers."
"That's one of the problems. We need a lot more space until they finish the building. There are dangerous radioactive skunks and mice patrolling Lawndale. The Bellard guy managed to fly away from us – "
"—you won't see him again – "
"—tell me about it. So catching him is out of the question now. He's gone back to his bosses. We're supposed to be the spokespersons for a youth organization which has a billion dollar budget. And somehow, with all this mess, AND Tiffany's weirdness, my parents believe that Quinn and I are somehow no different than before and expect us to live normal lives around the edges. And my edges are starting to fray."
Jane walked over to the refrigerator. "So how many cans of Dew do you want?"
"Enough to sink a kidney. That's why we need Trent. We're short on manpower."
"Uh…Trent isn't exactly manpower. He just occupies space."
He occupies exactly the space I need occupied… oh crap! I didn't mean to think it that way! Oh hell…!
"Uh…" said Daria, "do you think he's capable of watching Tiffany?"
"Well, he couldn't do a worse job than Penny or Summer did with me. Penny let me squirt Reddi Whip into my nose. Snorted white stuff out of my nose for a week."
"Okay…do you think that Trent can watch things without letting the area burn down? And without any Reddi Whip accidents?"
"That he can do. Nothing's burned yet. By the way…I need to show you some stuff. It might be important."
(la la LA la la)
In the other room, Quinn and Sandi watched Tiffany sleep.
"She looks really peaceful," said Quinn.
"Unfashionable…but she's sleeping."
"Sorry about…uh…my cousin."
"Don't worry about it." Sandi knew all about annoying siblings, but would never dare tell Quinn that she knew that Daria and Quinn were more than 'cousins'. How does a fashionable person like Quinn have such a dork for a sister?
"Uh…Quinn…? Do you think that Tiffany's going to be all right?"
"Well…Dr. Burchell helped Daria out with her powers, so she could help Tiffany."
"Yeah." Sandi was feeling very guilty. She had been so worried about her own poor health, and then worried about Quinn's new popularity boost that she had left Tiffany by the wayside. You're a rotten friend.
Sandi looked at Quinn. "I have to make a phone call. I don't want to bother Daria or Jane. They don't look happy." The muffled voices of conversation between Daria and Jane could be heard elsewhere in the trailer.
"There's a back door! But there aren't any stairs. It's like a five foot drop or something."
"I can make it. I just want to be alone for a while."
(la la LA la la)
Sandi carefully let herself out the back door. Outside the trailer, there was nothing but dust that covered a rock surface. In the distance, Sandi could watch the line of trucks bring steel, pipe, and materials to this excavated and forgotten part of Lawndale. I can't believe you can build anything out here. The dust would get in your hair!!
Fumbling inside her purse, she reached for her cellphone. She dialed a number on speed dial.
"Hello?"
"Mom? Sandi. I'm calling from where they're going to build the skyscraper."
"Well? What happened?"
"I'm in the Legion."
"Wonderful. Listen, Sandi…I want you to get to know everyone first, have them feel comfortable. Be nice to the dowdy girls, butter up Quinn…then, you'll bring me in as a consultant! This is the biggest opportunity of your life. Don't blow it! Stay as long as you have to, but I want you to get home at the first opportunity. I've already started making plans for you!"
"Okay. Listen…I gotta go."
"No problem. I'll see you when you get home, Sugar. Bye."
Sandi clicked the phone shut. By rights, she should have been happy that all of her plans worked out. And what for? Tiffany was sick. Daria and Jane were mad at her. She was tempted to split and have a conversation with herself, but that was no good. It would have been like talking to a mirror.
The fact that she hadn't even tried to call Tiffany bothered her. Were you in pain, Tiffany? Did you suffer like I did? Why didn't I try to help you?
Looking into the horizon, Sandi knew what her mother would say. "Tiffany is not your problem. Focus on yourself." There had to be something extra that Sandi could do for Tiffany.
Suddenly, Sandi knew what she could do. Maybe it wasn't something she could do herself. But it was something someone else could do. And her number was on speed dial. It was time for Sandi to make things right.
(la la LA la la)
The four other Legionnaires met around Tiffany's bed. While Tiffany slept, none of them felt secure enough to leave the room.
"Okay," said Jane. "First things first. The trailers belong to Quest Corporation. They're pretty cool, and if anyone needs to crash here, we can. When they get the new digs built, we'll move out of them and they'll be rolled away. A dude comes out here once a day to see if we need anything. There's a list attached to the refrigerator door, leave it there. He has the key, he'll knock.
"Next. These bracelets are for all of us." Jane handed out three bracelets. "Sandi, yours will come in the mail."
"They look clunky and unfashionable," sniffed Sandi.
"Tough titty. Each of them has a global positioning system hookup. Since I can fly, I need it so I know where the hell I am up there. Daria's has her blood pressure monitor built into it. Quinn, I don't know if that thing is going to fry off of you when you blast something, so don't get attached.
"Next…cellphones." Jane handed everyone a belt.
"Cool!" said Quinn. "This will go with my outfit!" Quinn's cellphone was pink, Jane's was red and Daria's was blue.
"You put the elastic belt around your waist, and snap the cellphone in here. Kind of like Batman, but without any Bat Anti-Shark Spray. We need cellphones to keep in touch in case we get divided. There's a number we can call at Quest which is encrypted."
"Excuse me…Jane?" said Sandi. "These aren't the same…clothes I saw you wearing during the commercial?"
Daria smiled. "Gasp. The very same. We have a bright orange one picked out just for you!!"
Sandi looked ill.
"Like, how many cell phone minutes do you get?" said Quinn.
"Uh…I don't think it matters. Quest is paying for it!" said Jane.
"Fantastic! I have to cancel my dates for tonight! This will be great, Sandi! We can call each other without running up a bill!!"
"'Bright orange?'" asked Sandi.
"Hey," smirked Daria. "Everyone gets a different color."
"And we picked orange," said Jane, joining in. "Non-negotiable."
"Nothing goes with orange!" Sandi mumbled something incomprehensible after the outburst.
"And no complaining," said Daria, "because I can read your mind whenever I want to. Not that I would ever want to."
"Dah-RIAA!!" said Quinn, now embarrassed. "We are not going to make Sandi wear orange!"
"Not until she proves herself in trial by combat," said Daria.
Sandi blanched. "Combat?"
(la la LA la la)
"It's going to be a few hours before Stacy can get here," said Sandi. "Her parents are making her do yard work. She'll be here as fast as she can."
Quinn tried to reassure Sandi. "Sandi, Daria and Jane were just teasing! There's no trial by combat!" I think.
"All I can say is, I now know why you were so desperate to have a sane person be a part of the Legion!. I just want to you know that I am here for you, in the capacity of both friend and Fashion Club President."
"Thanks, Sandi! This is going to be great! No more being pushed around anymore!"
"Yeah."
"You know," said Quinn. "If we can get Tiffany in the Legion…then there would be more of us than there would of them…."
"Hmmm…Quinn, you are absolutely right!"
"And I was thinking that I – "
" – would nominate me as President of the Legion? Quinn, that is a brilliant idea!! I am touched and honored that you would put me ahead of yourself. With your help as Vice-President, the Legion will be on its way to greatness and popularity! I accept this heavy burden. But not so quickly!"
" – well, Sandi, I was really thinking that – "
" – okay, the first thing to go are these 'uniforms', or whatever! No member of the Fashion Club can be seen on a permanent basis in those unsized clothes!"
"Yeah, they are kind of geeky…although I still want pink!"
"And Jane and Daria can keep red and blue." But I'll be dead before I'm seen wearing anything orange…!!