A/N: Sorry this chapter took so long! It's one of my favorites so far though :) Also, Gilmore Girls fans should recognize some elements of this chapter.
Maura rubs her icy fingers together, breathing a gush of warm air onto her numb hands. Her head buzzes slightly, still whirring from hours of studying in the library. She's exhausted, and she wants to make the transition from a fully occupied mind to the bliss mindlessness of sleep with as little room for wayward thoughts as possible; it makes reality slightly less bitter.
But instead, she finds a tiny note tucked up against her pillow, written in a familiar scrawl, the letters long and angular.
Meet me by the lake?
Maura has barely had a moment to thaw, but she's already tucking her scarf more tightly around her neck as she leaves the building, buffering herself against the cold.
There's a small lake by the edge of campus, back behind the football fields. It's not a far walk, but the November wind-chill feels like knives against Maura's face, stabbing her numb once again. She finds Dell, lying flat against the grass near the edge of the lake. She's unresponsive as Maura hovers over her, her eyes glassy and stoic.
"How long have you been here?" Maura asks, crouching beside her.
Dell turns her head slowly; she doesn't answer though she pats the ground beside her. Maura arranges herself on the icy grass, nudging herself close to the dull heat that Dell's body radiates. Dell takes her hand, their skin thawing with the contact into a pleasant tangle of warmth.
"Is everything okay?" Maura asks after a long moment.
Dell squeezes her hand a bit more tightly, a sensation of warmth rippling through Maura's body. "Archie..." Dell's voice is so soft that Maura can hardly hear her. "Archie's gone."
Maura's heart drops, but in an unexpectedly delightful way.
"I thought after all the shit we've gone through...I thought just maybe things might start working out. But it looks like I was fucking wrong."
Maura doesn't say anything. She knows Dell isn't looking for advice; she just doesn't want to be alone.
The stars are gorgeous tonight, visible through the thin, cloudless air. Dell lifts her finger toward the heavens. "Look, there's a moving one. Make a wish." Dell's voice is hoarse.
Maura squints. "That's an airplane," she automatically corrects.
Dell rubs her thumb against the back of Maura's hand. "We can wish on airplanes, too."
Maura watches the airplane creep across the sky presses her back against the ground, her body aching as she dares to wish. She closes her eyes for a moment, certain that she can feel a low, primal hum emanating from the earth. It pulses through her body, her limbs tingling as she breaths in the sharp, chilly air. When she opens her eyes, the sky dances, the stars swirl, and the familiar constellations pulse and contort.
She turns to Dell, lacing their fingers together more tightly. Dell's eyes shine - soft, vulnerable, needy. Dell tucks her head against Maura's shoulder, so close to Maura that her eyelashes dance against her cheek. There's a halt, like the suspension between movements in a classical piece, and the small hush grows louder, timid at first as Maura reaches to touch Dell's icy cheek, leaving a gentle kiss against the corner of Dell's mouth. Then all at once the symphony bursts forth, a rush of sound, the entanglement of teeth and lips and fingers. She tastes salt, warm and damp from her own tears. The ache in her body diminishes as she clings desperately to the moment.
XXX
Jane's pace slows immensely as they finally reach the quaint dwelling. Maura watches her eyes dart helplessly around, as if a Holiday Inn might spring up miraculously in front of them.
"It looks cute," Maura urges, quite ineffectively. She wobbles a little on her sore ankles, and Jane begrudgingly opens the door, a small chime denoting their arrival.
It's very pink, and nearly every inch has some kind of bow, lace, or floral design. Every crevice is packed with teddy bears, and Maura has spotted as least four cats lazing amongst the excessive decor before they even approach the reception desk. The woman behind the desk nearly blends in with her surroundings, wearing vintage floor length floral dress.
"Welcome to the Cheshire Cat. How may I help you ladies?" Her smile is so large that Jane automatically recoils.
"Just a room for tonight, please," Maura answers.
"Just one night?"
"Yes. Unfortunately, we got a flat tire so we merely need a place to sleep for the night," Maura continues politely.
"What a shame." The woman's voice is too high and slightly nasally. "Let me know if you need anything at all. I'll put you two in room three." She produces a key dangling from a cat pendent.
Jane coughs. "I need to consult with my friend for a moment." Jane tugs Maura's arm, nudging her toward the entrance. She lowers her voice, "We must leave this place immediately."
"And sleep where?" Maura whispers, glancing apologetically back at the woman.
"A hollow tree, a riverbank. I don't care. All this lace is suffocating me, and I'm allergic to those demonic creatures," Jane nods toward the cat mewing at her feet, and if on cue, sneezes quite loudly.
"Jane," Maura pleads. "We don't have a choice." Though tonight has panned out in a sequence of unfortunate events, Maura can't help but to feel slightly pleased at the prospect of spending the night with Jane.
Jane nods, though she's still a little snippy as she grabs the key, informing the woman quite plainly that they'll find their room themselves, which happens to be as heavily saturated in flowers as the rest of the house.
"I'm going to have a seizure," Jane moans, collapsing against the bed.
Maura leans up against the edge of the plush comforter, kicking off her heels. "You know," she says a bit timidly, "this doesn't have to be completely terrible."
Jane sighs, rolling onto her side. She props herself up on her elbow and her face softens. "Sorry. I didn't mean to take my frustration out on you." Another heavy breath. "Casey called while you were talking to the tow guy, and he's pretty pissed about what happened. Keeps texting me and telling me he wants to come up and get me. It sucks - I feel like he always cares too much or not at all. Never a nice happy medium."
Maura scoots a little farther up on the bed, chewing on her bottom lip.
"But it'd be pretty damn pointless for him to come all the way up here, especially because we have to get the car in the morning. And, despite all my incessant whining, I really do want to be here with you."
Maura tucks her knees against her body, overcome with giddiness. Jane's face melts into an easy grin, and they enjoy each other's smiles for a moment.
"I'm starving," Jane mutters after a moment. She thrums her hands against her flat stomach. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm gonna go downstairs and brave that crazy cat lady to see if I can find anything to eat."
She's gone in a moment, leaving Maura to fall back against the pillows, her own stomach flopping, but it's certainly not from hunger. The door swings open, and Jane pants a little as she slams the door behind her, making sure to lock the door before she tumbles back onto the bed.
"I see you weren't successful." Maura notes her empty hands.
"Well, I was gonna ask her if I could get some food, but she started rambling about the activity schedule for tomorrow and then proceeded to go get me one. So naturally, I emptied the candy dish on the desk and ran." Here, she spills the contents of her pockets onto the bed. "A small victory." She pops a bite sized Snickers into her mouth.
They're both a bit giggly as they feast on their sugary treats. It's as though they've grown closer in just this one evening than they have after spending weeks together. Maura wonders how each moment feels more perfect than the last.
It's late by the time Jane scoops up the empty candy wrappers from the bed. She stops by the window, peering out into the darkness. Maura stifles a yawn.
"We should probably get some sleep," Maura mutters, finally taking of her skirt. She feels just a tiny bit self-conscious as she crawls under the comforter in her blouse and panties. "Are you coming to bed?"
"Nah," Jane slumps against the chair across the room instead. "Gonna stay up for just a little longer. I'll get the light for you though."
She reaches to flick it off, and Maura breaths softly in the darkness, watching Jane fiddle with her phone for a little while before her eyelids grow too heavy to keep open and she tumbles gently into slumber.
XXX
She wakes up to a piercing scream, her ears ringing with terror as he eyes fly open.
Jane.
"Jane!"
She kicks away the covers, fumbling in the darkness for the light, her heart jumping all the way up to her throat. She squints as the lamp spills it's brightness into the room, her eyes falling on Jane, who is thrashing in the chair.
"Jane," she says again, softer this time, as she realizes Jane is still asleep, her face is contorted in agony. She steps toward Jane, touching her arm lightly, feeling the other woman tense. "Jane," she croons softly. "Jane, it's all right. Jane, I'm right here."
Jane lets out a small whimper as Maura tucks her against her body, enclosing her in her arms. "Shhh," she whispers. "You're okay." Jane lets out a tiny sob, rocking against Maura until she can breathe. "Jane, please come to bed."
Jane nods, following Maura back to the bed. "I'm sorry," Jane whispers, her voice gruff. Maura takes her hand, feeling Jane's pulse flutter rapidly against her wrist. "I was hoping that wasn't gonna happen tonight."
"There's not need to apologize," Maura assures her, then, "Does this happen often?"
Jane is silent for a minute. Maura's eyes have readjusted to the darkness as she looks at Jane's profile, her brow creasing softly. "They started after..." she chokes up just a little. "After Hoyt."
Maura's throat wells. She scoots a little closer to Jane, daring to run her fingers through her dark hair, her curls thick and soft. She doesn't know if it's her hazy sleep-induced state or some kind of protective instinct kicking in, but she's feeling much braver as presses her body closer to Jane's. Still, she clarifies, "Do you mind...that I'm touching you?"
"'Course not," Jane turns to smile at her, nudging herself even closer. "It's nice. I like having you here."
They say nothing more, and Maura continues to stroke Jane's hair until her breaths become slow and even once again. Even when Jane falls asleep, Maura says cocooned against her side, taking in a contented sigh as she falls asleep, too.