Chapter 2: Broken Wings

Standin' in the doorway, Daryl felt like the outsider he'd always been. The grave was dug...the cold earth waiting to take her from him forever. He'd killed her...it was his punishment...his penance. Beth was layin' on a narrow couch, Maggie sittin' beside her, holdin' her hand, everyone else around her. Even people she'd never met were payin' respects. Glenn was the one who noticed him standin' back by himself, nodding to Rick who looked over his shoulder.

"Come on...let's give Daryl a minute," Rick's voice was somber.

Almost everyone listened, filing past Daryl through the door, not makin' eye contact or even acknowledging he was there. It was like he didn't exist. Daryl wished that was the case. Maggie was the only one who refused to go, even when Glenn took her by the arm, trying to pull her away.

"No...no...she's my sister...my baby sister...she's mine..." Maggie pleaded, Rick goin' to a knee in front of her, tryin' to calm her...reason with her.

"Maggie, let Daryl have a minute with Beth."

"No...Beth..." Maggie was all tears, grasping Beth's lifeless hand tighter...more desperately.

"Maggie...listen to me...let him..." Rick's voice cracked. "You've had her all your life...just let Daryl have this..." She stopped fighting, stopped sobbing, just looking at Rick like she didn't understand. How could she?

"Why?"

"Because..." Rick looked back over his shoulder at Daryl like he was asking permission for something he was about to say. "Because he..."

Rick wasn't gonna be the one who said it.

"Because I love Beth."

Maggie looked at him, letting go of her sister, letting Glenn help her stand, her tears comin' again. Before Glenn could get her out the door, Maggie latched onto Daryl, hugging him, pressing her cheek against his chest. He stood still as stone. He didn't have anything to give. It wasn't Beth. Then it was just Rick standin' in front of him, reaching out, laying a heavy hand on Daryl's shoulder.

"I love her..." Daryl looked down, knowing there were gonna be tears. He wasn't strong enough. Never had been.

"I know..." Rick squeezed his shoulder before leaving Daryl alone.

He knelt beside Beth, head bowed, not able to look at her for the longest time...he'd failed...there was no way he'd ever get past this...didn't want to. Beth was gone. He was done. Staring down at his hands...his finger...his left ring finger...there was something missing. Wings? Nothing was making any sense. He was losing his grip on reality. He knew that now. Daryl ran his thumb over the bare ring finger feeling empty, until he worked up the courage to take her hand in his, steadying himself...allowed himself to look at her. She was so beautiful. He'd always known she was a pretty girl, but their time together, all the threats, tryin' to keep her alive, figuring out what he was feelin'...he'd never really had time to appreciate her beauty. Even now, in death, the inner light...that faith that had made him believe, hope...love...it was still there. It was his light that'd been extinguished. And worst of all...Beth...she'd had faith in him.

After we burned the cabin...the second cabin...and I stopped in the woods to look back, you told me to follow you, that you wouldn't lead me astray. When you turned away, all I could see were the wings on your back. I knew in that moment...I didn't really know why yet, but I realized I would follow you anywhere...I was taking it on faith. I would follow you into the dark...

Daryl heard it...Beth's voice...so clearly in his head, sayin' those words...he'd never forget...but that...it had never happened. Still, in their time together, she had faith in him...he knew that...and her faith, it'd been misplaced. Beth believed in him, trusted him, and he couldn't keep his word. He'd lead her wrong. Beth followed him into the dark...to her death. And she hadn't just died...the bullet through her head...it hadn't been enough. She'd suffered...Daryl's finger gently traced over the stitched gashes on her forehead and cheek. She was scarred.

"I'm sorry Beth...I'm so sorry..." Daryl roughly swiped his cheeks with the back of his hand. He didn't deserve to cry...

...all I could see were the wings on your back.

Daryl let Beth's hand go, shrugged off the damned vest...fucking wings...he wasn't no angel, and Beth died 'cause of it. He held it together long enough to put the vest on Beth, careful not to hurt her. It was the only thing of value...of meaning he had to give her. Buttoning every button, he realized just how tiny Beth was. He was sitting beside her now...it was the only time it could ever happen...the only chance he would ever have. Daryl leaned down, letting his lips touch Beth's. She was supposed to kiss back. He was supposed to take her breath away...but her lips were cold, and she had no breath left. Their first kiss...it was their last...his last...

"Take 'em...take 'em...They're broken, but they're mine..." It was his tears staining her cheeks now as he hunched over her lifeless body. He wasn't even tryin' not to cry anymore. "Take these broken wings. They're all I got Beth...all I got..."