A/N: Just answering some of your questions first...
Is Christian still with Elena? - No, their so called relationship ended when he was 21 just like in the books...
Has Ana been sexually assaulted in her past? - No, used that back story for her in two of my other stories, so this time it's something different...
How many subs did CG have and has he one currently? - He had 15 subs and no, he does not have a sub now.
Is Ana taking self-defense classes? - No...
What does OOC and AU mean - OOC stand for out of character and AU for alternative universe...
Ana
I have no idea what to do. Ever since I saw Christian and Elena together this afternoon, I keep thinking about it. Maybe I was wrong and just tried to see something that in reality isn't even there, but everything inside me tells me that it is true. Shit, if it is true I don't even want to think about when this started.
I think back to my childhood and remember how often Christian was in trouble with brawling in school and I know he was drinking, too. Mia and I used to sneak out at night to meet for sleepovers in her treehouse. One night when I climbed over the fence into the Grey's backyard I found Christian lying under a tree, unconscious and covered in vomit. He was so pale, I thought that he was dead and started to scream bloody murder. He didn't even wake up, but my screams were loud enough to alarm both his and my parents.
My mom had to sleep in my bed with me that night, because since I never saw Christian waking up I was convinced that he was dead and I wouldn't stop crying. The next day he came over to talk to me and he promised me he wouldn't drink again. That promise held for about two weeks when he stumbled into the dinning room at Grace's birthday party, drunken out of his mind and throwing up all over the place only to pass out on the floor. After that I denied to talk to him for nearly six months. I was 8 years old by that time and I adored Christian, I was seriously hero worshipping him and for him to lie to me broke my heart.
After that his parents send him to Elena Lincoln's house to work in her backyard as a punishment. Miraculously his fighting and drinking stopped after that. Thinking about it now gives me a really bad feeling. He had just turned 15 when all of that happened. Fuck, what if that old bitch made him stop fighting in exchange for letting him fuck her. Urgh, only thinking about it seriously freaks me out. Maybe I should just call him and ask him. Yeah, right Ana, and after all that happened in the last couple of days he is going to tell you the truth, sure!
Well, I guess not. I could confront Elena, but that bitch would lie anyway. I can't tell my mom or Grace, because if I am wrong I will look like an idiot. But what if I am right? Oh, this is so fucked up. I mean yes, he is an adult now and he knows what he is diong, but what if she has brainwashed him since he was a boy? Then she probably still has her claws in him and he doesn't even know that what happened between them or is still happening is wrong.
I wish I could to talk to someone about this, but I can't. Well, maybe I could talk to John about it, but he can't tell me if Christian has told him about this, so this would get me nowhere. While I try to think of something that I could do, I feel my palms getting sweaty and my breathing is getting heavier. Oh no, not again! And as I think this the dry heaves start and I barely make it into my bathroom where I throw up again. Shit, I thought I got over this. Besides one time during my trip through Europe I never had this panic attacks where I ended up vomiting and now it was twice in one day. If I keep this up I will lose all the weight I'm so proud that I gained.
I take some deep calming breaths and brush my teeth before I decide to go into the kitchen and have something to eat. I was late for dinner and not really hungry when I came home, but after throwing up twice in one day I need to eat something so I won't start to lose weight again.
In the kitchen I make myself a sandwich and put some cheese and grapes on my plate before I sit down at the table. Just when I'm finished with my dinner Anya comes in the kitchen. I'm worried about her, too. Since I'm back she hasn't spoken more than three words to me. It's like she is avoiding me at all costs.
"Hey Anya, do you want to watch a movie?" I ask her. It's only 7:30 so we have plenty of time to watch one of those teenie horror movies she loves so much.
"No" she whispers and takes a bottle of water from the fridge.
"Okay, how about I pick you up from school tomorrow and we hit the mall. My treat?" I know she loves shopping and we could need a little sister bonding time.
"No, thanks" now she sounds pissed and I frown.
"Okay, help me out here, Anya. Have I done something wrong?"
She turns around and glares at me. "Why do you even care? First you went to Europe for six months and now you are moving out. You know what? Just go, go and never look back because surely you will forget all about me the moment you leave this house again." She starts crying and runs up the stairs. I jump up and follow her, just in time for her to slam the door of her room shut before I can follow her inside.
"Anya, please. Let me in. Let's talk about this."
"Go away!" she sobs loud enough for me to hear it through the closed door. That's enough, I open the door and go inside, finding her sobbing on her bed.
"Hey, don't cry, you making me cry, too" I say gently and sit down on the edge of the bed. "Talk to me, Anya, please."
"Why, I just got you back and all you can think about is leaving me alone here again." she pouts through her tears and I try hard not to smile.
"Look, I don't want to leave you alone, it's just that if I get accepted for my master studies then it is much easier for me to live close to the campus."
"But you stayed here while you went to college the first time." she says sounding like a three-year old and this time I do smile.
"I know and I ended up sleeping at my friends houses or Christian's most of the time, because I had to learn so long that I was too tired to drive back home. Besides if I have a two bedroom apartment in the city and you decide to study in Seattle after you graduate you could move in with me and you can stay at my place at the weekends. I'm not trying to get away from you Anya, you are my baby sister and I love you. I'm just trying to be a grown up and living at home at 22 is not really grown up."
"Dad wouldn't mind." she says making me laugh. "Come Anya, if it was up to Daddy we would live here until we are 60. Have you never thought about moving out?"
"Well, yes I have, but I ... I ... nevermind" she looks at her hands and again huge tears start to fall down her face.
"Hey, what is wrong?"
"I feel so ashamed about myself Ana, I wanted to be grown up like Cooper and you so bad and I have made all the wrong choices and ... and Mom and Dad are going to kill me." Oh boy this does not sound good.
"Anya, what do you mean Mom and Dad are going to kill you?"
"I ... I think I'm pregnant." Holy fucking shit. Did my sister who just turned 16 two months ago really just tell me that she is pregnant?
"What do you mean you think you are pregnant?"
"He promised me he would use a condom and he knew I'm not on birth control and I trusted him and it was dark in the room and I only noticed afterwards that he didn't use the condom on the nightstand. I'm scared Ana, I can't have a baby." she sobs and I hold her in my arms while she cries.
"Okay, look at me. Have you done a test?"
"No, but I'm late. I have bought some tests, but I'm too scared to use them and look at the result."
"Good, look, you have to do the test now. I'll stay with you and I look at the results if you want me to, but you have to do this now."
Five minutes later we are in her bathroom and wait for the results. Oh my god, she can't be pregnant. She is 16 for crying out loud, this will ruin her life. When the alarm I set up on my phone goes off, I look at Anya who is still crying and look at the results.
Oh thank god for that. "You are not pregnant." I show her the three test results and hug her.
"Now, you and I will have talk, come on." I lead her back into her room and we sit down on her bed.
"Tomorrow afternoon I'm going to pick you up after school and you will see a doctor. We need to get you checked for any possible STD's. After that you will start birth control. I also want to know the name of that boyfriend of yours and Anya, you will not see him again. We can keep this between us, but if you continue to see a guy who has no respect for you or your safety I will tell mom and dad and they will probably ground you until you are thirty."
"I'm not going to see him again, I promise, but please don't make me tell you his name."
She looks desperate, but I can't let this go. "Anya, I'm serious. I know this sounds mean to you, but either you tell me or I will ask mom and dad to come in here right now."
"Okay, okay, please don't tell mom and dad. It ... it was Ethan."
"What? I mean you are not talking about Kate's brother, right? Anya did you have sex with Ethan Kavanagh?"
"He told me how pretty I am and that I remind him of you and he would take me to clubs where I wouldn't get in normally and it was so cool to feel like a grown up and not to be treated like a child all the time and one night he took me to his apartment. Kate was out with Mia and we had some beers and he kissed me and I wasn't sure if that's what I want, but he told me I would like it and so I thought... you know, if I want to be treated like a grown up ... I trusted him, but it only hurt and I didn't like it and he was so mean afterwards. He told me he only started to hang out with me because I reminded him of you, but after fucking me he realised that I just didn't do it for him. He just kicked me out and told me if I would tell someone you all would hate me because he was still with Mia when it happened, please don't hate me." she cries and in this moment I want to kill Ethan. How dare he seduce my 16-year-old sister and use her like this.
I cup her face in my hands, so she has to look at me. "Listen, I would never hate you, nor is anyone else going to hate you. Ethan crossed a line and I will make him pay for it. He seduced you, he knew you are young and naïve and he took advantage of that. This is not your fault, you knew him almost all your life, of course you trusted him. But don't ever believe this is your fault."
"But I let him do this ... maybe if I had said no..."
"No, please Anya, this is not your fault. Ethan is almost 8 years older than you are, he should have known better. Instead he got you drunk and seduced you."
"Have you ever done things you regret, like having sex with the wrong guy."
"I did some things I'm not proud of, like lying to our parents when I was a teen, but umm ... I'm still a virgin, so no to the sleeping with the wrong guy."
"I wish I would have waited, too. And actually I don't want to try it again for a long while."
"I think that's a good choice, wait for someone who is special to you, someone who makes you feel safe and doesn't try to pressure you into having sex."
"Maybe, Ana can you stay with me until I'm asleep?" she asks and when I nod she changes into her pj's and slips under the covers. I lie next to her and stroke her hair until I'm sure that she is asleep. I quietly leave her room and just get my purse to leave.
I am so mad, I think I have never been this mad in my life. I know I shouldn't confront Ethan in this state of mine, but I can't help it. I drive into town and storm into the building where he shares an apartment with Kate. Once I have reached their door I start to bang my fists against it.
"Open the fucking door Ethan, I know that you are home!" I yell and ten seconds later Kate opens the door, but I just walk past her into the apartment.
"Jesus Ana! What is wrong?"
"Where is your fucking brother? Ethan get your ass in here now" I scream and when he comes out of his room and has the audacity to smile at me, I lose it.
"What the fuck is wrong with you. Anya is a child! Do you hear me, she is a child! How dare you to touch my sister and use her?" By now I am screaming so loud I am pretty sure the entire building can hear me and I couldn't care less.
"Calm down Ana, she wanted it. I didn't force her."
"You got her drunk and then talked her into having sex and you didn't even use any protection you bastard."
"Oh my god, Ana are you saying that Ethan had sex with Anya, with your baby sister?" Kate looks sick as she asks me that question.
"Yes, he brought her here, gave her beer to drink and talked her into having sex with him. He told her he would use a condom and he didn't and afterwards he kicked her out." I tell her in a rush and focus on Ethan again.
"Listen to me you asshole, I'm going to ruin you and if it is the last thing I do, you will pay for what you did to my sister!"
I am so angry I think I'm going to lose my mind and he starts to laugh. "Calm down Ana, we live in Washington, in this state it is not a crime if I have sex with a girl who is 16, that's why I waited until after her birthday. See, I guess now you wish you would have said yes to me in france" he hisses and I see red. I let out a scream and tackle him to the floor where I start to punch his face and every part of him I can reach with my fists over and over again.
"Police! Get off the floor, hands above your head!" I hear someone scream and sure enough when I turn around there are two cops next to a completely shocked Kate. They have their guns pointing at me and I slowly get off of Ethan who is bleeding from his nose, mouth and a cut on his eyebrow.
Before I know what is really going on, I find myself in handcuffs on the backseat of a police car.
At the police station I have to give them a blood sample, my finger prints are taken, I have to do those stupid mug shots and they interview me for more than two hours. I have declined to call a lawyer for now. I know that is the wrong move, but I did assault Ethan, so there is no denying it and the only lawyer I know is Carrick and I don't want to call him. So after I have given them my statement I am told that I can leave if someone comes to post my bail. I could have done that myself, but in my rush to get to Ethan's I forget my wallet.
I don't want to call my parents, so I decide to call Cooper. Great he is never going to let me hear the end of this, but I don't want to spend the night here, so I dial his number.
"Cooper Steele"
"Hi Cooper, umm where are you?"
"Hey Ana, I'm at Christian's he has bought a new company here in Seattle and wants Elliot and I to do the remodeling of the building."
"I see, so ... umm... I kind of got arrested for assault and I'm at the police station in downtown, could you please come and bail me out?"
"WHAT? Are you fucking kidding me Ana? You got arrested, what the fuck have you done?"
"I tell you later, please just get me out of here" I beg him.
"I'm on my way, but you better have one hell of an explanation for this Anastasia, I can not fucking believe it." he snaps and hangs up.
One of the officers locks me into a holding cell and I sit down on the cot and look at my bloody knuckles. Oh my god, this is so fucked up. My parents will be so mad at me, I will probably never get accepted into any college for my masters and the Kavanaghs will probably get the best lawyers money can buy to make sure I end up in jail. I'm only back in Seattle for four days and I already wish I would have stayed in Europe.
"Well look at you, isn't that how every brother wants to see his sister." I hear Cooper's angry voice and look up. Oh joy, it's not just him, but Elliot and Christian, too. They are all glaring at me and I can tell that they are fucking pissed. Great, it's like I have three older brothers all of a sudden.
None of us says a word until we are out of the station. "Can you just drop me off at Kate's my car is there?" I mutter not daring to look at Cooper, Elliot or Christian.
"Nice try Anastasia, get into the fucking car, you have some explaining to do. We are going to my place."
"But..."
"GET INTO MY GOD DAMN FUCKING CAR OR ELSE I WILL SPANK YOUR ASS RIGHT HERE AND PUT YOU IN THERE MYSELF AFTERWARDS" he screams at me and I stare at him wide-eyed. My brother has never yelled at me and actually he looks really scary right now.
"Okay, okay" I mutter and quickly get into the backseat of his car. Cooper gets behind the wheel while Elliot gets in the passenger seat and Christian gets into the backseat with me.
"Cooper, take her to the hospital first, looks like she has a broken knuckle or two." Christian says and I roll my eyes.
"It's nothing I'm fine."
"Shut up!" they all yell at me in unison and I stare out of the window as we are driving to the hospital. After getting checked the doctor in the ER tells them that my knuckles are only badly bruised, but not broken. So Cooper takes me to his place and as if it wasn't bad enough to have him going to lecture me, Christian and Elliot are coming with us to his place.
Once there Cooper gives me some ice for my hands and all three of them sit down facing me.
"So do tell, what on earth has gotten into you? Did you get into a bar brawl? Are you doing drugs now?"
I stare at Cooper in horror, is that what he thinks has happened?
"I did not get into a bar fight and I am sure as hell not doing drugs. I umm ... I lost it and beat Ethan to a pulp."
"You did what?"
"I have beaten up Ethan. And you know what, after what he has done, I would do it again. He deserves what happened."
"Okay, then tell me what has he done?"
"He weaseled his way into our sister's life, waited until she turned 16, then he took her to his apartment got her to drink too much beer, then he talked her into letting him fuck her only to kick her out afterwards telling her she was a bad lay. He also told her he would use a condom and he didn't so I have spent my evening trying to console our baby sister who thought she was pregnant, which luckily she isn't and when I got to his apartment to confront him with what he has done he had the audacity to laugh in my face and tell me that he only did this because I told him that he would never have a chance with me."
"Where is he?" Cooper's word are spoken so calmly that it scares me.
"I don't know. I guess he is at the hospital."
"Wait, you beat him into the hospital?" Elliot asks and he looks clearly amused.
"From what I could see while I was put in handcuffs his nose is broken, he lost a teeth or two and he has bad cut on his eyebrow."
I look at my hands completely embarrassed and suddenly I hear them all laugh and my head shoots up.
"You think this is funny?"
"No, it's not funny ... what he did to our sister, he deserved it, but I don't think he is going to press charges against you, Ana. Hell, what guy wants to confess publicly that he got beaten up by a girl half his size. Fuck, now I wish I would have been there to watch it, but Ana we have to tell it Mom and Dad."
"I know, I promised Anya I wouldn't tell them, but yeah, I guess that's not an option anymore. Oh, and since I'm going to have to find a lawyer tomorrow to get out of this mess, would you mind picking Anya up after school so she can get a check up, you know STD's and everything since Ethan didn't use a condom."
"Sure, but don't you think it would be better if mom takes her to see that kind of doctor?" I look at Cooper and he really does look uncomfortable.
"Cooper, do not ask me for any details, because it took me months to push these memories into a deep, dark corner of my mind where I'm sure that they will never come up again. But as much as I love our mom, I would rather ask Dad to accompany me to a doctor's appointment than mom. I did it once and I do not want to traumatize our sister any further."
"Okay, I'm not going to ask, but there is one other thing that I need to know." he looks at me all serious and that alone tells me I am not going to like his question, but I gesture for to go on.
"Did you have sex with Ethan, too?" he asks and I have to take a deep breath as I feel the anger rising inside of me.
"No, okay? I did not fuck Ethan, I didn't fuck anyone, but obviously you already chose to believe him" I hiss and point at Christian.
"I saw the pictures Ana, pictures of you letting all those guys into your hotel room. And that you refuse to tell me why you had them there makes it hard to believe you that nothing happened!" Cooper snaps back and suddenly I'm sick of it. With my panic attacks back I won't be able to follow through anyway. I get up and grab my purse.
"Fine, you want to know who those guys were? They were vocal coaches and piano teachers. I took lessons and booked them online before I even left Seattle. You know how mom and dad always complain that none of us shares their love for music, well it was supposed to be my surprise for their anniversary next month. There, now you know."
He stares at me and shakes his head sadly. "Honestly Ana, you could have come up with many lies I would have believed, but this one is not even a good lie. Well, you are 22, if you want to fuck around its none of my business, but don't ever lie to me again."
For a moment I'm shocked. He thinks I am lying, my brother never accused me of lying and it hurts.
"Good, I guess then it will be best you just forget that you have a sister at all, because clearly you have already decided who is worth your trust and who is not. I'm not going to try to convince you otherwise." With that I turn around and head for the door, but as I reach for the doorknob all the anger and hurt inside me needs an outlet and though I know it is wrong I turn back around and face Christian.
"Oh before I forget about it Christian, what do you think will Grace say if she finds out that all those years when she worried about you being gay or that you will never find a girlfriend, you were fucking Elena Lincoln?"
His eyes widen in horror and all the color drains from his face and in this moment I know that my suspicions were right.
"You have a week to tell her or I'll do it. I guess now you wished you would have kept your mouth shut!" and with that I turn around and leave Cooper's apartment. But as the anger slowly subsides I realise that I have just made a really big mistake...