Author's Note: The dialogue in this chapter is from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Chapter 2, "Spinner's End."
Severus knew about the task that Draco had been given, but it was still a surprise to him when he opened his door to Narcissa in the middle of the night.
For a brief moment, Severus looked around for Lucius, as he had never before saw Narcissa without her being with her husband.
But then Severus remembered, Lucius was in Azkaban, so there was no way he could be with Narcissa.
Severus tried not to think about why Lucius was in Azkaban in the first place. Lily's son was safe, and that should have been enough to console him.
But the sight of Narcissa reminded Severus that Lily was not the only person he cared about that had come to harm because of his actions.
Severus, however, quickly composed himself (just like any decent, self-respecting former Slytherin would do) and invited Narcissa inside.
Bellatrix followed her sister into the house.
Why couldn't Bellatrix have been caught instead of Lucius? Severus couldn't help but think.
But what had happened could not be undone. All Severus could do was to try his best to live with the consequences.
Severus then attempted to focus his attention on Narcissa, only to be distracted by Bellatrix's accusations that he was not to be trusted.
For once in your life, Bellatrix, you are right, Severus thought with some degree of amusement.
His amusement, however, was quickly replaced by annoyance. Bellatrix had always had that effect on him.
Finally, though, Severus was able to silence Bellatrix long enough for him to speak with Narcissa. He already had a good guess of why she was here. Even though Narcissa had always treated him with respect, she had never came to him just for the sake of talking.
"'I—I think you are the only one who can help me,'" Narcissa said to him. "'I have nowhere else to turn. Lucius is in jail and…'"
Severus had to resist the temptation to grab Narcissa in his arms and hold her close.
I'm so sorry, Narcissa, he thought to himself. This is all my fault. I wasn't fully thinking. I just wanted to keep Lily's son safe. I wasn't even thinking about something possibly happening to Lucius.
Severus, however, managed to keep his face impassive. He had a role to play, and he had never before allowed his emotions to get in the way of that role. And with the Dark Lord being back and rapidly regaining power, Severus really could not afford to reveal his true loyalties. More now than ever, he had to be careful with what he said or did.
"'The Dark Lord has forbidden me to speak of it,'" Narcissa continued. "'He wishes none to know of the plan. It is…very secret. But—'"
"'If he has forbidden it, you ought not to speak,'" Severus said sharply, even though he wished he could comfort her instead. "'The Dark Lord's word is law.'"
Narcissa looked so broken by Severus's words that he really had to struggle to maintain his cold demeanor. But even though Severus wanted to help both Narcissa and Draco, he couldn't state it so directly. He did not want to give the Dark Lord any reason to suspect him. It was enough that he had to deal with Bellatrix's accusations. But if the Dark Lord was to start to become suspicious, then Severus really would be in trouble.
And then what would happen to Narcissa and Draco? Severus knew that he was a poor protector compared to Lucius, but he still had to do his best.
Besides, it's the least that you can do for Lucius, especially after what you did to him, a voice spoke inside Severus's head.
Severus then began to do a dance of words with Narcissa. He made sure to sound reluctant to help her, for if he was truly loyal to the Dark Lord, then he wouldn't want to go against him in any way.
Severus also wanted to make sure that Narcissa understood just how dangerous this situation was. Draco wasn't the only one in danger. Narcissa's actions could potentially place her in danger as well, and Severus was determined to make sure that she stayed as safe as possible.
A part of Severus truly hated himself for his cowardice. He wished he could be like Narcissa, who was not afraid to make it clear just who her loyalty lied with.
But Severus also realized that it was dangerous to be too open with your true loyalty. It could get you killed.
Narcissa, however, clearly didn't care about her own safety. Severus knew it had nothing to do with her being stupid or naïve. Most people tended to underestimate Narcissa and saw her as being nothing more than just another silly Pureblood wife, but Severus knew better. He knew that Narcissa was Lucius's equal in more ways than one.
No, Narcissa knew with perfect clarity just how dangerous all of this was. She just didn't care. As long as Draco was safe, she could care less what happened to her.
Severus really wished that he could be more like Narcissa.
At the same time, though, Severus knew that he had to do whatever it took to keep her safe.
The Dark Lord was eventually going to find out about this. Severus had to make sure that the Dark Lord did not see Narcissa as anything but loyal. A little hysterical perhaps, but loyal.
For Lucius's sake, Severus had to make sure that Narcissa did not earn the Dark Lord's wrath.
It was bad enough that Draco had already being targeted. The same could not be allowed to happen to Narcissa.
Especially considering that none of this was truly Lucius's fault.