A/N:Hey guys it snowing where I am! how is it where you are? I am at the library so that means they are about to close for inclement weather. I am thinking this chapter... is soooooooooo awesome even though is short as all others. but you will love it or throw your laptop or tablet across the room when you read it. I didn't see this coming. I didn't and it is far from over so there is more to come. Enjoy this and Happy thanksgiving to my US Peeps-S.K.

8

This make out session lasted for a full five minutes before I pulled back. She took a breath and looked at me, she was still fascinated, turned on at that. but there was this thing in her eyes. she was freaking out. "What are you thinking?" I asked.

"How bad I want this to continue," she said.

"Leave him." I commanded boldly.

"And do what? I love him Jade." Tori stated flatly.

I pushed my chair back and knocked her hand off my thigh. I walked off toward the door and nearly plowed into some girls as they were coming in. I caught one of their eye and she waved her friends off. "I'll be right in there."

"Sorry about that," I said and took a deep breath. "It's okay, I ah just wanted to give this to you. I'm Carla by the way."

I took the paper from her hand and said. "Jade."

"I know… I watched the Play you produced last semester. Didn't know you were gay."

"Neither did I." I answered.

She smiled at me genuinely then leaned in and kissed my cheek. "Give me a call sometime." she said pointing at the paper, then headed into the club just as Tori was stepping out.

"I had to pay the tab." Tori said.

"You don't love him." I said.

"I do… I just… what if I'm not gay?" Tori said out loud.

"No one said you were… but you seem to be screaming out that you don't want to be getting married to that douche." I said.

"I feel like I'm in love."

"Yet you kissed me." I sighed. "Look I love Beck… but I will never sleep with him again. He isn't for me."

"You don't seem to be falling for any of the parade of women that you are sleeping with." Tori said

"That's because I am already in lo… I'm just getting to know how much I enjoy sex. I'm not married or committed to someone." Jade said.

"You are in love with someone." Tori whispered.

I groaned and walked toward the car. "Lets just go."

"Can't you just pretend I'm everyone else?" She insisted following me.

"You're not everyone else. You are my best friend. You don't see my hanging out with Michelle do you?" I got into the car. she knows. I'm sure she knows but I can't admit it to her. Not ever. Not unless she were mine.

She sat in the car with me and buckled up. "You slept with Beck… your friendship is intact."

"I'm also gay." I answered.

"You slept with Regine, your friendship is fine." folding her arms stubbornly across her chest.

I sighed. "Regine was my first. My teacher… I was so confused when she met me. It's different."

"So? you were confused when you met me too."

"I didn't know that." I answered.

"I need to know that I'm not missing out on something with you." She said and bit her lip.

"Leave him." I repeated as I drove toward my apartment.

"I Love him." she said

"I love Beck." I said to her. "Leave him."

"I'm…"

"Fuck, don't tell me I don't want to know please." I said and stopped the car in the middle of the street and walked off a ways. I couldn't be in there with her. I was close enough to home that I could get there in twenty minutes.

"Jade." She said pulling up next to me. "Get in the car."

"Just drive the car to the apartment and get in your car and drive home Tori." I said continuing to walk.

"What about your Keys?"

"Leave them in the apartment."

Cars started to speed around her now that she was creeping along next to me. "I need to talk to you."

"I can't right now... " I said my heart was heavy in my chest.

"If you love me you will get in this car." she said and I stopped and turned to look at her through the window.

"If you are my friend you will drive away right now." She stopped the car.

"I'm your friend, and I will drive away. If you tell me. Tell me."

"You already know." I said with a sob. "Just go…"

"Tell me." Tori said.

"I LOVE…" I said and I couldn't finish. "Go." was all I could say after I caught my breath.

She stayed for a few more seconds, and she drove away. I leaned against the wall of the shop. I was on Sunset, and the way I was dressed I looked like a freaking hooker. But I didn't want to go home. I couldn't go there. I reached in my jacket pocket and pulled out the paper Carla gave me. I reached for my phone in the other pocket and dialed the number. "Hello?" I could hear the club music in the background.

"Hey, it's Jade… Can you come get me?"

I didn't sleep with Carla. I never would. Carla really only wanted to hang out. She didn't ask for what I couldn't give, and I just wasn't willing to. I meant what I had said to Tori, and now that she knew for sure, I couldn't let her think it wasn't true.

I stayed with Carla that night. Then when I got home in the morning. I knocked on the door and a frantic Tori kept into my arms. "Oh My god Jade. I thought you were dead."

I looked beyond her shoulders and all of our friends were there. I looked at Beck and he signaled that I should go over to him. I did. He always made me feel better. I let him hold me. "Where were you?"

"I spent the night with a new friend." I said to him. "She let me cry and snot all over her. I mean I couldn't let you all see that."

He chuckled and walked with me to my room. "What happened?"

"She made me tell her." I answered. "I just...I couldn't be with her in that car."

"Well when twenty minutes passed and you didn't come home, she called me to see if you had called me. Then every twenty minutes she called the rest and we just waited to hear. She called you about every ten minutes till she fell asleep an hour ago." Beck said.

I reached into my pocket. "Phone's dead." I shrugged and headed to my closet to get my I don't want to deal with life clothes. "I was fine. I'm a big girl." Beck picked up my phone where I had dropped it on my bed and plugged it into the charger.

"We worry anyway." He said. Then he walked out of my bedroom. Can I tell you that I am thrilled that she stayed. That asshole didn't get her back that night.

As I showered, there was a knock on the bathroom door. "Come in but don't look." I said

"I was worried sick, and I didn't even get a hello." Tori said.

"Tori I love you, but if you are here, you either get to the point or get in the shower."

"Where were you?" She asked.

"At a friend's house."

"You sleep with your friend?"

"Not that it is any of your business, but no I didn't. I needed a safe place to cry okay." I answered truthfully.

She breathed a sigh of relief. then I heard the toilet lid lift and she was throwing up and I knew what she had been trying to tell me without her having to do so. I sighed and turned off the shower and sat on the side of the tub Pulling her hair back so that she could finish her bout of morning sickness. I rubbed her back soothingly. "See that's what happens when you sleep with boys."

Tori laughed then turned to face me. She came face to face with my breasts and was transfixed. I remembered then how much she loved to look at them so I reached for my towel and covered up. I was still mad at her for making me say it. Now I was doomed for a long sexless existence for as long as I stayed in love with her. "It's why I said yes. He doesn't know about it yet."

"But you drank last week." I said startled.

"I didn't really care last week." She continued. "I was so pissed at him, and then you, as you went off to make out with some girl and I was sitting there." she said as she flushed the toilet.

I sighed as she got up to wash her mouth. "You didn't tell me you were gay until you had to. You made out with me, and you fucked Teresa at the church." Tori said and registering my look of shock and shame. "She told me."

"Oh my god." I said covering my face.

"She told me to tell you that you tasted GRRREAT." she exaggerated the great. "So I just had to see what was so great about you that a woman would leave her fiance over. See I know you have no problem being with anyone willing. Except me, and then it hit me, You're in love… With me! I already loved you. Never thought you'd love me too."

Wait, did she just say she loved me? "So leave him."

"No." Tori said, "Because I know he will stay with me. and I can't trust you to stay."

"What?" I said incredulously. "That's not fair to the douche bag."

"I love him." Tori repeated, "and our baby."

I shook my head. "Well Tori, I can't trust you with my heart. you have it, and now that you are aware that you do, don't break it. Cause right now you are squeezing it so tight it might explode. I need time. Forget Fridays till I can see you again okay?"

"I just thought I could be honest with you." She said softly.

"Did you think I wouldn't get hurt by your truth? Who has done the most damage here?" I opened the door to the bathroom and there were four ears glued to the door. I shoved through the wall of friends and into my room where I dressed in the most comfortable clothes I could find and wrapped myself in my cocoon of misery.

A/N: Oh my god in heaven! I cannot believe it! it was a scandalous "Her" Wednesday. I cannot believe how this turned out! I certainly didn't see it coming I just let Jade talk for me. I could feel how heavy this was and how guilty she felt for having kissed Tori. then her panic when she had to get out of the car. That was when I knew what Tori needed from her and it was weird how everything happened. Thanks for riding this Roller Coaster with me. Remember I post these on Wednesdays. My boyfriend's mother its one of those that I update on Thursdays, but of course... it is the Thursday for eating so I may never get to it. Anyway have a wonderful Holiday those of you celebrating and the rest of you bear with me. Till next time, Much Love!-S.K.