(A/N: Chapter Six! I can't believe it! This is only shorter than Token Of Love- and Token has 50 of the reviews Loss of Me does. I'm so grateful. Thank you! Chapter five got some great concrit. I'm not sure whether it's proper author form, but I'd like to address those issues so they don't interfere with anyone's enjoyment.

First of all- the whole Romance thing. There was some disappointment with Sawyer/Kate in Chapter 5. I'd like to say right here and now that LOM is an adventure fic. Any relationships that arise will be arbitrary. That said, I have to acknowledge relationships which already exist- and there is canon chemistry between Kate and Sawyer that I can't deny. It doesn't mean that I'll focus on romantic pairings any more than in passing. …But I'm still not telling you who Kate ends up with! (has hypocrisy up the yinyang)

Secondly, a discrepancy between the way Claire was treated as an amnesiac, and the way Sawyer is being treated, was pointed out. I can definitely see where people are coming from with that because y'all quite right- they ARE treating Sawyer differently. But the circumstances are also very different. Claire they found roaming through the jungle pathetically- Sawyer turned out to be in the Hatch! Claire whimpered and fainted- Sawyer knocked Kate out and threatened to shoot Jack and Locke. Sawyer's had opportunities to probe and ask questions- and, because he's the Sawyer we all know and love, he's shot them down. Lastly, the relationship between Jack and Sawyer and the relationship between Jack and Claire are very different. There are old grudges and animosities between Jack and Sawyer that don't exist with Claire.

Maybe this doesn't totally explain everyone's questions. I guess in the end, it all comes down to your opinion of what would happen. This is just one way to imagine things - yours might be very different. By the way, I've been checking some of the fics of the people who are signed in- y'all are very good! I'm flattered to be getting such great reviews.

-Locked Heart Ami))

Chapter 6

"You're letting him go? Are you a bunch of bloody nutters!"

Smiled in the most cocky and condescending way he knew how, hooking his thumbs in his pockets. "That's right, Chuckie, I'm on parole. An' I just can't wait to get to know you all."

"Jack- what are you playing at- this guy's a looney!" Charlie looked nearly beside himself with fury.

"Sure you're not just paranoid, hawse? I don't see no one but you here tryin' to keep me locked up." Wasn't entirely true, though. Despite the fact that only Charlie was directly confronting him, Sawyer noticed ht many others had conveniently found work nearby, and all seemed to have started their coffee breaks just as old hell-and-hurtin' Charlie had started shooting his mouth off.

"Sawyer has the right to come and go as he pleases, Charlie," Jack said firmly. "He's still a part of this camp."

"Part of the camp? Oh, I wouldn't go that far. I always say you're only as much a part of a camp as you're there by your own free will," Sawyer drawled, appreciating the fact that the line seemed to have completely bewildered Charlie. "But I appreciate the sentiments, Jackie boy. I'll be sure to make myself at home." Surveyed the beaches outside the hut. Shelters everywhere, made evidently with whatever could be found- branches, tarps, castoff clothing. "It all looks mighty… cosy."

"You better watch yourself," Charlie said fiercely, though with a little less sureness. "I've got an eye on you!"

"Well then," Sawyer replied with an ingratiating smile, "I'll be sure to conduct my lower half well."

"Watch yourself," Charlie repeated in a low voice as he walked away, casting several suspicious glances back over his shoulder.

"What's his problem?" Sawyer said, watching him go. "He afraid I'm gonna follow him?"

"He's got a… bit of a thing for Claire," Locke replied.

"Well THANK you, Dear Abby. I think I kind of noticed that without any outside help."

"He's just trying to look after her," Locke replied calmly. "Still, going around talking like that… not good for morale. Someone should probably talk to him."

"I'll go," Kate said immediately, and took off towards the forest through which Charlie had escaped. Sawyer fought the pointless urge to call her back, followed her with his eyes- and suddenly noticed Claire sitting at the forest's edge. She was nursing the baby, watching them- and when she noticed Sawyer looking back she stood up quickly, vanishing as well.

He sighed, feeling vaguely hollow- turned to listen to Jack, who had begun to speak.

"We usually eat, uh, about when it gets dark," Jack said, looking not at him but off in the direction Kate had gone. Were they?... "Locke hunts boar for food mostly, but there's fruit as well…."

"Whoa, hold on a minute." Sawyer said. "I'm not expectin' room and board here. Besides, wild pig ain't exactly my idea of fine French dining."

"Then what do you propose?" Jack snapped, turning to face him.

"Not Pumbaa au gratin," he retorted. Yeah, take your greedy eyes off Kate. "If you're going through my stuff anyway, why not rape the storeroom? I've got provisions for- two months, at least. Ain't first class cuisine but hey… beats the hell out of boar."

"Sayid's probably still in the hatch," said Locke. "If I leave now I can catch him before he starts heading back here- see what we can bring back together. Thanks, Sawyer."

"An' then there were two," Sawyer noted as Locke made his exit. "These shelters… what happened to you people? Were you all-

You all, everybody!

You all, everybody!

Actin' like you're STUPID PEOPLE wearing EXPENSIVE CLOTHES!

-At least make SENSE!" he yowled in frustration, pressing his palms hard to his temples. Jack watched him with no expression, just one significantly raised eyebrow, and Sawyer lowered his hands, finishing with as much dignity as he could, "What I was GOIN' to say was- were you all- in some kind of… accident or somethin'?"

"Yeah, you could say that," Jack replied, looking out over the huts. "We were in a plane crash… these are the survivors. It's been almost two months now."

"A plane crash?" he said skeptically. "And I've been thinkin' that you were some kind of experimental military corps or… hippie cult or something."

"Hippie cult? Why's that?"

"Well, you're recruitin', ain't ya?" Sawyer snorted, throwing his arms wide. "Guess you really thought I was your man."

Jack laughed. "Not exactly. Actually, you were a passenger on the-"

"-The hell I was, doc." Pause. "Look, as much as I'd LOVE to stand here watching the sunset with you…."

"Huh? Oh, right." Jack cleared his throat slightly. "So what are you planning to do now? If you want me to reintroduce you to people or something…."

"Thanks but no thanks, Welcome Wagon. Maybe some other time." He gave the camp another once-over. Looked mighty cramped. "Think I might just do a little exploring, if you don't object. Scope out the Gulag."

Jack didn't take the bait, and Sawyer's estimation of him went up slightly as he casually said, "Go ahead if that's what you want, but… I mean… there's not exactly much down here on the beach. A day and Rome… you know."

Critically speaking, Jack was right. 'Bout the camp that is- wasn't much to it. But… this wasn't ALL there was… was it? He just had this- weird feeling-… "Yeah, I guess." He said slowly. "I dunno. It's just-

I'm not the only one wondering

where you're going to weigh in

on this whole moving-off-the-beach thing.

Are you going?

We all pack up stakes for the caves and next day a plane passes by,

they're gonna go on their merry way none the wiser.

"Are there more of you somewhere? Maybe in caves?" he asked sharply, all in a rush. He had meant to sound casual but the rush of false memories made him a little dizzy and he was embarrassed to ask Jack at all. The doc had said if he wanted these to go away he had to ignore them….

"Y-yes! Yeah!" Jack replied. He looked very surprised- and a little- hopeful? Somehow? "Yeah there are! Do you-"

"-No!" Sawyer said without even knowing what Jack was going to say- began shaking his head vigorously, then stopped as he realized it made the post-flash vertigo hundreds of times worse. "No. Definitely not."

"But I mean-" Jack said. "If you remember the caves-"

"Don't remember nothing, doctor," He said firmly, in what he hoped was either finality or an air of rampant condescension. "Okay?"

"Then how did you know about the caves?"

"There's like ten of you here!" He exclaimed, trying to act like it was obvious, turn away his own unsureness. "Pretty damn small plane, I'd say."

"But the caves-"

"There are always caves on uninhabited jungle islands. Hell, Jackie, don't you watch TV?"

"Haven't really gotten around to it recently," Jack said wryly. "We haven't attempted building anything more sophisticated than a golf course."

"A golf course?" Sawyer laughed in spite of himself. "A doctor playing-

-Golf? Now I've heard everything.
What's next?

A cop eating a donut?

FLASH

You trying to be funny?

You bet.

FLASH

You're sensitive to the light?

Ya know what, I'm sensitive to YOU.

FLASH!

"Sawyer? Are you OK!"

Color to black and back to color and suddenly he was inches from the ground, on all fours, dizzied, disoriented. He blinked in confusion and no little amount of worry. What the hell? He had actually blacked out for a couple of seconds. That had never happened before. The phantom memories were annoying but that- that was kind of dangerous.

"Sawyer? You- you can hear me- right?"

"Too damn right," he grunted. Slowly standing up. "Y'ever think people don't answer you because maybe they don't like you?"

"Always a possibility. But shunning people doesn't usually involve a state of nervous collapse. Are you-"

"YES." He snapped. "I'm okay, I'm fine, and even if I wasn't, doc, I wouldn't go to YOU because-

My insurance ran out a long time ago.

He grabbed a tree in preparation, but nothing happened except the usual wave of nausea, leaving him feeling a little foolish and a lot confused.

"Uh, on second thought…." he said slowly, feeling very unsettled, "Maybe I won't go explorin' til later. Think I'll just… go find myself somewhere to take a rest or somethin'. Get some ice for that punch."

"I think that's probably a good idea," Jack said. "Are you sure you don't want-"

"YES. No. I'm sure. I'm sure. See ya round, Doc."

And he began to walk slowly away from Jack, lightheaded, leaning on trees for support and feeling about as far from sure as a man could.