CHAPTER 15
They, Edith and the rest of the people at the front of the group, say that we're drawing closer to the gate. I don't think Tobias and I can express our relief enough. Tobias and I walked side by side in silence, something that happened easily for us. I glanced down at the sleeping bundle in my arms and then brought my gaze up to look at Tobias.
"Do you want to hold Mason for a little while?" I asked him, offering my arms towards him. He handed me the bags full of our belongings and rocked Mason in the crook of his elbow.
"He's grown so big already, Tris." Tobias remarked, smiling down at me. I nodded, feeling tears spring to my eyes. It had only been about a week since he had been born and already I felt like my son was growing too fast. The boy beside me chuckled and supporting Mason with one arm, he looped his other around me, pulling me close as we walked behind the rest of the group. "Aw, Tris, it's ok. It's a good thing."
I nodded against him. "I know but it's too fast."
A shout from up ahead brought our conversation to a stop and drew our attention to the rest of the group that were a few metres ahead. Tobias let his arm drop from around me but I clutched his hand in mine tightly. He looked down at our joined hands and then back up at my face, reading my expression which must have been a mixture of relief but a little bit of fear. He smiled and squeezed my hand while we continued to travel towards the group.
As we drew closer to the group, they were pointing to something off into the distance. I peered past them and saw the old, familiar rusty gate that led into the old factions that I had grown up in. I could have slumped to the ground with relief at that moment. There was only about another one hundred metres until we were back in the safety of our old home.
Hand in hand, Tobias and I followed the rest of the group towards home.
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As soon as I stepped foot into Abnegation, my mind was whirling with all of the possibilities that I could have be doing, now that I was back in civilisation. A hot shower seemed like the best idea or maybe just taking a nap in an actual bed.
The bags were dumped in the kitchen and Mason was gently placed in his crib for the first time. I stared contently at the small bundle that was fast asleep in the crib. Strong, warm arms wrapped around my waist from behind and I leaned back into them.
"He looks so peaceful." I murmured to Tobias as his lips brushed the spot just behind my ear, causing me to shiver. "I don't think I'll be able to leave this room to sleep in another… I've grown so used to sleeping with him beside me."
Once we had gotten back to Abnegation, Tobias and I had slipped away from everyone, avoiding anyone who might welcome us back, to go back to Tobias' old house where we could get a decent sleep.
Tobias' voice brought me back to the present. "We could bring the crib into our room, place it beside the bed." My face lit up at this idea and Tobias chuckled. I gently scooped Mason up into my arms, careful so as not to wake him up and watched as Tobias carried the crib to our room.
Once Mason was once again settled in his cot beside our bed, Tobias headed off to get changed. I stood by the crib and watched as he wandered in to the ensuite and shut the door. He caught my eye at the last minute and offered a small smile to me. I tried for one back but it was only a small twitch of my lips. Something flickered in my eyes at the small attempt of a smile but he promised he would be back soon.
I slumped onto the bed, looking through the rails at my baby boy who was already beginning to grow blonde curls. I heard the shower run and then the shower door close. Glancing down at Mason who was still asleep, I quietly wandered into the bathroom after Tobias. He had his back to me so he hadn't realised I had come in. Slowly, I let my clothes fall to the ground and I stepped into the shower. Tobias whirled around, his eyes wide.
"Tris?" he asked, warily. I wrapped my arms around his torso and rested my head on his bare chest, his arms automatically wound around me, holding me tightly against him. "Just hold me." I whispered simply. "I've been beside you for the past several months, now I don't know if I can bare being away from you, not being able to see you in front of me, not being able to touch you."
"But what about Mason?" He rested his cheek against the top of my head and breathed a sigh.
"He's asleep in his crib." Was all that needed to be said. We stood like that for what seemed like hours, until we thought we should get out. Mason was still asleep in his crib when we returned to the bedroom. Collapsing onto the mattress, we curled up against each other: our legs tangled up, my head on his shoulder, tucked into the crook of his neck and his arms around me. Like that, we fell asleep.
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I woke to the familiar sounds of my baby's cries. When I glanced up at Tobias, I saw him already awake and staring down at me intently.
"Hey," I murmured sleepily, stifling a yawn. I heard him mumble good morning to me too as I leaned over to peer into the crib, where my crying baby lay. "Morning, Mason." I cooed and picked him up. I pressed my lips to his face before pecking him with kisses all over his face, hearing him giggle in delight. "Are you hungry, baby?" I offered him my right breast and felt him latch on and begin sucking.
Tobias placed his arm around my shoulders and pressed his lips to my temple. Gratefully, I shrank into his embrace, savouring his warmth.
Unfortunately someone had to knock on the front door at that time. With a sigh I went to get up but Tobias placed a hand on my knee. "You stay here, I'll get it."
I nodded and a few moments later, Tobias appeared in the doorway with a glint of excitement in his eyes, just as I was beginning to change Mason. "It's for you…"