"Mrs Dennis, this is Miss Hall - you need to come and pick Sif up it's urgent. There's been an incident - message left at 10.45am) I listened to the answer message over and over as I tried to imagine what kind of incident my three and half year old could have gotten herself into on her first day of school as the floor felt like it was moving underneath me. I'd only just checked my phone after seeing out a client who came to visit me at home, looking too the top of the screen to note the current time. 11.50am. 'Shit' I thought.
I looked down to the screen of my phone, my finger hovering over the call button next to Tamsin's name. Deciding against calling her as the realisation hit me that she would probably send half of the Ontario emergency services to the school 'just in case'. No, it was better if I go first to assess the situation.
It was only when I jumped in the car did the panic begin to set in, 'If it was something as simple as a fall or a cut knee surely she would have told me in the answer message?' I thought, periodically checking my phone in case she tried to call me again. 'What if Sif's been taken?' I nearly started to hyperventilate at the idea, hitting the gas pedal as concern for road safety quickly went out the window.
. . . . . . .
I pulled into the school parking lot and jumped out of the car, my knees buckling underneath me at the sight of the two police cars as my breathing turned into hyperventilating. Immediately falling to the ground as I prayed to the many gods in faraway worlds that my baby was okay.
"Bo, Bo it's me, it's okay - it's not as bad as it looks." I heard the familiar gruff voice, looking up to see Dyson's reassuring eyes. "We're bringing her out now." he explained to me, holding me in his arms I clung to his muscular shoulders. Praying this really wasn't as bad as it looked, because from where I was sitting, it looked awful.
"I want to know what has happened." I growled, "Somebody tell me right now what's happened to my baby." I broke into a sob as Dyson pulled my flailing arms against his body in a tight embrace.
"Dyson, you have three seconds to tell me what the fuck is going on before I start tearing limbs off, and trust me - they'll be ones that you miss." I gritted my teeth.
"Mommy, Uncle Dyson's Netflix isn't working - can you fix it?" I heard my daughter's chirpy voice call to me out of the cruiser window.
"Wha-" I started to speak, confusion etched on my face.
"Everything is fine, I promise I'll explain everything but let me just get Sif for you first." he interrupted me.
I shakily got up off of my knees, trembling as Dyson opened up his car door and picked my daughter up out of the cruiser, taking his iPad back from her as she ran over to me and jumped in my arms. "I don't like school mommy, can we watch Nemo instead?" she babbled, kissing my cheek as I held her close to my body.
"What happened baby?" I asked, still in the dark about everything.
"The girl was picking on me, and then something happened and mama came and she was angry - then she got into a fight with Eva." she explained, playing with strands of my hair as her attention changed. "Mommy you have pretty hair." she smiled, running her fingers through my brown locks.
"What do you mean mama got into a fight baby?" I pressed further as she boredly sighed, rolling her eyes as if she resented having to repeat herself. Before she could explain I heard the familiar shouts of my wife herself.
"I know where you live bitch, don't you forget that." she shouted behind her as Dyson dragged her away, her face curled into a snarl "Don't forget I can fly too, there isn't a place on this earth you can hide from me motherfucker." she screamed, wrestling and jerking her body as it suddenly dawned on me her hands were handcuffed behind her back.
Sif quickly hid behind my leg. "I don't like it when mama is angry mommy." she whimpered, breaking my heart as I picked her up and held her to my chest.
"Let's get you in the car and you can watch Netflix whilst I tell mama off, how does that sound?" I bargained with her as she quietly nodded her head with watery eyes.
. . . . . . .
I got Sif buckled into her seat and set her up with an episode of Spongebob before I walked to the cruiser a few metres away where my snarling handcuffed wife was sat in the back with Dyson, cursing at him to take them off.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" I shouted at her as she thrashed against the handcuffs before stopping to turn and look at me, panting for breath whilst a look of fear washed over her at the realisation she'd been caught. "Do you have any idea how much you scared Sif today?" I growled, opening the cruiser door to climb into the vacant seat next to her.
"Bo I swear- I can explain everything if Dyson would just take these fucking cuffs off." she spat at the wolf beside her.
"I don't approve of doing this, but I'm going to make an exception given the circumstances." I sighed, pressing my hand against the side of Tamsin's bare neck and using my Succubus powers to relax her as she slumped on the side of my shoulder, her eyes thick with lust as she stared up at me.
"You're so pretty." she whispered with a goofy grin.
I turned back to Dyson and nodded, giving my approval for him to take off the handcuffs as she brought her wrists around to the front of her body and stretched them, the skin rubbed off raw and bleeding from where she'd been straining so hard. "Jesus Christ, Tamsin. What the hell got into you? What even happened?" I questioned her, lifting her arms as gently as possible to look at the damage.
She quickly recovered from the effects of my power as soon as I broke physical contact from her skin, her eyes blinking at me as I stared at her like a hawk, making sure the familiar spark of rage didn't ignite back in her eyes. "Tell me, or I'll Succu-blast you until you do." I growled.
"Okay, okay-" she calmed me. "I got a phone call to say there'd been an incident, and I knew you were with a client so I thought I'd just be discreet and assess the situation before calling you - so I brought two police cruisers and the sniffer dogs in case she'd gone missing." Tamsin explained.
I went to admonish her until I remembered my own train of thought on the drive here, the panic in my chest at the thought of Sif missing or hurt. "Valid." I said, nodding my head in agreement.
"So then that Hall lady tried to tell me I was acting 'too aggressively' to enter Sif's classroom and body blocked me from the door, so I choked her out before she could Siren me into cochlear implants for the rest of my life." she sighed, clearly regretting her actions in retrospect. "So then I go into the classroom and Sif is sat on her own in the corner whilst the other kids are watching Mr Rogers, I ask her what happened and she told me that she'd started talking to that girl in Norwegian, Sif told her how her mama and Grancacia were Valkyries" Tamsin took a breath, clearly getting angrier just reliving the story. "So then, that little bitch told her that I was a monster and a doodoo head, Sif got angry and Valk'd out on her - scared the little shit half to death along with half the other kids in her class before Miss Hall could calm her down." Tamsin smirked, proud of her baby.
"W-wait, she -Valk'd- out?" I asked, my eyes wide with shock. "As in, valkyrie face and everything?" I finished.
"From what Miss Hall told me? Full valkyrie face and wings too! I've never been so proud in my life Bo." she momentarily gushed with pride.
"Well at least we know she's Fae now." I sighed, disappointed neither of us were there to witness it, we'd been there for her first words, her first steps, her first giggles - but not this. "But that doesn't explain how you ended up in handcuffs?" I raised my eyebrow.
"After Sif told me what happened, I told her to point out which one picked on her" she explained, her gaze wandering as she tried to find the best way to phrase it. "I kind of lost my temper." she admitted.
I shoved her in the arm. "Tell me you didn't put the Valkyrie on a room full of children?" I declared, putting my head in my hands as I waited for her to confirm my suspicions.
"What? God know! You think I'd let Sif see my Valkyrie face? She just thinks she used the power of her mind, she doesn't even know her face changed yet." Tamsin frowned, rubbing her head as she tucked away the information for the conversation she would need to have with our daughter about her powers later.
"Which brings us back to my question, how did you end up in handcuffs?" I pressed again, growing frustrated with the lack of answers.
"Well I-" she paused. "You see, the thing is…" she muttered, looking around the car as she attempted to find the right way to phrase it. "What had happened was-"
"Tamsin falcon punched the kid in the face." Dyson interjected, clearly as bored as I was with her attempts to skirt around the topic.
"Dude-" Tamsin gasped. "Not cool!"
"You did fucking what?" I screwed my face, trying to process that my wife punched a baby.
"She called me a doo doo head!" Tamsin exasperatedly sighed, throwing her hands in the air as if it was blasphemy.
"I can't believe you, I can't." I growled, getting ready to climb out of the car.
"Bo, she was a Troll! Literally!" she tried to defend herself. "She was 5ft 9 and had skin a blowtorch couldn't cut through, I bounced right off of her - she didn't even move." Tamsin muttered, clearly slightly embarrassed that a fight between her and a three and a half year old wasn't the easy win it sounded like it would be.
"To be fair Bo, the kid charged at Tamsin and knocked her out of a pane glass window. She gave as good as she got." Dyson laughed.
"This isn't funny, I can't believe either of you." I shook my head as Dyson fought back giggles.
"That kid tore her ass apart." Dyson burst into laughter.
"Oh real funny Jackass, what was I supposed to do? Use my powers in front of my kid?" Tamsin growled, not amused.
"I couldn't drag Tamsin out of the classroom by myself, the boys in the other car had to help me get her in a supply closet to calm down whilst she was getting ready to Valk out. I knew if we didn't get the cuffs on her there was no way we were getting her out of the school without her wearing that kid's face like a mask." he explained, finishing the tale of how she ended up in handcuffs.
"You frightened her today Tamsin, she said you scare her when you're angry." I admitted, crossing my arms disapprovingly as the older blonde sulked.
"I'm sorry." she whispered, her big blue eyes looking up to mine as she melted my heart. "I promise, I'll let you take care of things next time the school call." she conceded, frowning as she thought on today's events.
"You think we're going to be able to send Sif back to this school?" I asked incredulously "We're going to have to send her to St Vladimir's now." I groaned, rubbing away a headache at the thought of driving across town every morning.
. . . . . . . . .
"Mommy tells my night night story." Sif wondered aloud as I sat at the side of her bed, stroking her head as we looked at the pictures in her storybook. The soft glare from her night light casting the room in an ambient glow.
"I know baby, but mama did a bad thing today and even when adults do a bad thing they have to say sorry." I explained, frowning as I kissed her head. "I'm sorry I scared you baby, mama got angry and she shouldn't have." I admitted.
"Mama, are you a monster?" Sif frowned, throwing me a curveball as I searched my soul for the answer.
"What do you think baby?" I asked her, curious to how this approach would go.
"I don't know." she sighed, pulling my hand, signalling for me to climb in bed which I gladly obliged. I climbed into the single bed as my body curled around hers protectively, pulling her into my arms as she petted my cheek with her hand.
"Am I a monster mama?" Sif asked with the most heartbreaking frown.
"What? Are you kidding? You're not a monster little one, what made you think that?" I asked, mindful to keep myself calm for fear of scaring her again.
"What am I then mama?" Sif asked with curiosity, as if she'd believed all this time she was a monster.
"You're a very, very little valkyrie, just like a little version of Grancacia and me." I smiled, punctuating my words with kisses to the white blonde crown of her head.
It was only when I pulled back that I saw her bottom lip trembling and her eyes filling with tears as the most heartbreaking whimper broke free from her chest.
"Baby what's wrong?" I panicked, tears threatening to prick my own eyes as four years of paranoia that my daughter would think I was a thing of nightmares came bubbling to the surface. I heard the door creak, knowing Bo was stood watching but I couldn't bring myself to turn around and look - knowing that I'd crack if I looked into her eyes.
"I'm not Mama. I'm a monster." she whimpered as I pulled her tight against my body.
"Don't you ever say that word baby." I hushed her, rocking her against my body. "You must never say the M word again, it's the worst word." I explained to her.
"But I am mama, I am a 'M' word." she skirted around my rule.
"Why on Earth would you think that Sif?" I questioned her, softening my voice as I brushed the hair from her cheeks and stared into her big blue eyes.
"Because you and mommy are pretty and I'm not." she cried.
"What do you mean you're not baby? You're beautiful!" I pressed her again, my voice taking a serious tone as I grew ready to explode out of the bedroom and hunt down whoever it was who'd filled my daughter with these thoughts.
"I turn into a m-m-monster" she stuttered "when I angry and you and mommy won't love me if you see it." she whimpered, her heart breaking into a million pieces.
And then it hit me, how this was my fault. By treating it like my face was something to be ashamed of - I'd filled my daughter with the same fear. I'd failed her as a mother in that regard and the knowledge brought me to tears.
"See mama, you don't love me." she sobbed even harder as she pointed to my own tears.
"No! No baby, mama loves you more than anything. Okay?" I promised her.
"Then why you cry?" she hiccuped.
"Because mama is sad that you think you're a monster." I answered earnestly, kissing her head. "What makes you think your face isn't beautiful?" I asked her, trying to get to the bottom of her anxiety.
"W-when mommy said I couldn't have a cookie, I got angry and my face change in the mirror." she explained, recovering from her crying fit. "It wasn't like mama's face anymore." she finished.
"Is that why you think you're a monster, because your face wasn't like my face anymore baby?" I asked her, hoping she wouldn't break down into floods of tears again.
"Y-yes." she replied.
"Mama has a scary face too sometimes, so does Grancacia, all valkyries do." I explained to her, stroking her face.
"Y-you're lying mama, you never have a monster face." she shouted at me, angry that I would deceive her.
"I'll show you mine, if you show me yours." I tempted her as she rubbed her eyes with her fists.
She strained her face, gritting her baby teeth as she tried to force it to happen, until her eyes began to sink into her face and her cheekbones became more prominent, her skin growing frighteningly pale in the ambient glow of the light as I stared at her brimming with pride.
I closed my eyes and let my valkyrie come to the surface as I grew scared to open them again, for fear that I'd petrify my daughter, forcing myself to when I heard her gasp at my face.
"See, mama didn't lie." I told her, her little jaw slack with shock, I began to worry that she was frightened - until her little hand came up to stroke my face as I reciprocated. "Grancacia can do it too, it's like our special magic trick baby." I explained to her.
"Can mommy do it?" Sif asked with uncertainty, as if she was coming round to the idea of it not being ugly but only if mommy was down with it too.
"No, it's a special trick only we can do. Mommy has a special trick of her own, she can make her eyes bright, bright blue and make people feel super loved." I divulged as if I was telling her a secret. "Mommy will show you tomorrow." I grinned, our faces still sullen and pale as she momentarily giggled back, before taking a serious stare again.
"So mama's a monster too?" she asked, her voice laced with hope.
"If you're a monster, I'm a monster." I beamed, tickling her sides.
"When I grow up I wanna be just like mama." Sif giggled, crawling up on my chest to cuddle me as I remained aware of Bo's presence behind the crack of the door, watching from a safe distance as our daughter blossomed. "Will mommy still love us if we're monsters mama?" she quietly puzzled.
Bo pushed the door open with a creak, the sound startling Sif as she shifted her stare to the opposite side of the door, not letting Bo see her face.
"I can't make my face go away mama." Sif whispered with panic, tears brimming in her eyes as it occurred to me she hadn't learned how to turn it off on command yet.
"It's okay, we don't have too. Mommy loves us just the way we are." I explained, looking at my wife with a smile as I sat for the first time in her presence comfortably in my own skin.
"Mommy don't look, I'll scare you." Sif frowned, her back still faced to Bo.
"...You don't have to show me till you're ready, but mommy loves you no matter what face you wear. Mommy can make her face do something special as well." Bo tempted her, which clearly worked as Sif hesitantly turned around.
"There's my beautiful girl." Bo grinned, a wave of relief crashing over our daughter as her little legs practically flew off of the bed and into her arms.
"I was scared mommy." Sif admitted, nestling her face into Bo's neck whilst she sucked her thumb.
"I was scared when I first knew I was special too, so was mama." Bo comforted her, climbing into the single bed alongside of me with our daughter in her arms.
I couldn't help but take a moment to enjoy the scene before me, my daughter pressed up against Bo's chest, sucking her thumb contently with her special face. I moved a long strand of dark hair from Bo's face and pushed it behind her ear, kissing her jaw line until she turned to kiss me back, her lips crashing against mine in a way that told me she was as happy as I.
"Mommy, will you show me your special trick?" Sif quietly requested, her voice heavy with sleep, looking up at Bo's face expectantly.
Sure enough Bo's eyes turned into that magical shade of blue as Sif's mouth widened in awe, her eyes filled with love as she stared into her mother's gaze.
"I want eyes like Mommy's when I grow up." she whispered, before sucking her thumb again, nestling back into Bo's chest as my wife curled up closer to me, kissing my collarbone as I closed my eyes along with Sif's, content in the knowledge that monsters can be beautiful too. Especially mine.