Hello everybody! Yes! I am updating! I told you I would! Anyways lets get down to the nitty-gritty. This chapter has made me change the rating to M due to SUICIDAL CONTENT! If you're offended in anyway I'm sorry, but I'm telling you this now, so don't say I didn't warn you! Now on with the show...
Chapter 21: Dwelling
For many hours Raven had sat in the warehouse, now the single occupant. Her cloak rested upon her folded legs as she harvested the thick crop of debris that had sewn itself into a series of frayed threads. Normally, she had no interest in participating in such a meaningless task, for she had an endless count of cloaks back at the tower. However, she had found that these small tasks required no emotional attachments and that she had a new found respect, and rather liked them. Her fingers were slightly splintered all the celestial warmth had long since been overtaken by the revolting coldness that had inhabited her body since birth.
Though each move she made ignited the burning wound on her left side, she welcomed the pain, knowing the reasons for doing so were just. The numbness, that she had often self inflicted, had created a will of its own and had dispersed itself in every way possible. Her mind, her thoughts, her senses. She could not feel the slightest tingle of life, not that she longed to. Her body temperature shrunk into shadows, the deadliness felt by few other living souls. Each breath she unwillingly took felt like a painful expanse in her lungs. It was intense, giving her the paranoia that her breathing would rip her tightening flesh from her chest, a feeling that seemed increasingly comforting to her. She would prefer it to drawing another nauseating inhalation.
Her eyes, once a vast ocean of intensity were shielded by an ominous cloud of sorrow. The brightness had died and the hue had turned a cold shade of gray. Anyone who would look upon this poor creature would feel the pain of each unbearable beat of her frigid heart.
She rose her head, parting the sea of violet hair. The early rising sun could barely be seen on the horizon, yet another reminder of the warmth and happiness that she would never feel.
Internally she was attacking herself. Picking each flaw in her character, whether physical or emotional, and letting her anger and hatred of herself ravage her mind.
It's all my fault.
Yes, yes it is all your fault. You saw this moment coming, yet you still chose to see him. You deserve what he did. He left you because of you, you know? He could never be with someone like you. You have too many problems, you have no control whatsoever and he doesn't want to waste his time with someone as pathetic as you.
...Yes, I am a waste of time.
Yes. And what are you going to do about it?
Something that should've been done years ago.
Phasing through the water stained window, she landed soundlessly on her bed, crumpling the sheets and spraying them with the remains of the debris from her cloak.
It would appear that she was gazing, emotionless, at her intricately painted wall, but to Raven, it was as if her eyes were closed. She could see nothing but a blatant black sheet of darkness. She knew that random sounds echoed naturally throughout the tower, yet her hearing was muffled and it seemed like the sharp sound of a pin dropping could be heard, reverberating for hours. Each breath became slow, like it was difficult, and her head swam. And for the first time in a long time, a single tear beaded up in the corner of her right eye and spilled down onto her soft cheeks. She sniffled, not hearing the weak sound, and shut her eyes, letting another wall of darkness overtake her.
Her chin began to quiver, a result of the reflex, to will away any emotional flare, her body accustomed itself to. A few nerves still held strong throughout her struggle, and her stale fingers shriveled up, clutching the satin sheets in an unbreakable grip. Each transpired breath forced out a pitiful sob, even more painful due to the fact of her resistance.
I know what must be done... The words echoed through the vacancy. The thought of letting go had frequently haunted her thoughts, even as a naive child, so naturally, the idea wasn't new to her. But could she really do what was simply unthinkable to most? Though she had been toying with the idea for some time she, honestly, didn't know if she possessed that amount of courage, super hero or not. But does bravery determine the capability, or is it desperation? That, she, and probably no one else knew the answer to. Only those lost who had committed the act could determine.
The more she thought about it, the deeper she fell within herself. The pain was less so, as anything remotely attached to the physical world faded away. However, a low pitched humming noise had rang out and had become so distracting that even Raven, whose spirit had nearly left her body, could no longer ignore.
Willing herself to return she blinked rapidly, thinking it would help the process. The darkness slowly lifted itself from her vision and her hearing cleared, amplifying the obnoxious hum.
Raven bolted from her bed, suddenly fully aware that red lights were flashing and a blaring tone played over the speakers.
Adjusting her cloak and pulling the hood ever her expressionless face, she exited her room hurriedly, not entirely sure how long the alarms had been going off.
Limbs numb and spirit dwindling she trudged down the hall into the main room, the cloud of darkness still playing around the edges of her vision. She could hear an eruption of speech, several feet from the door. Taking another painful breath she took one step forward, awakening the sensors that opened the doors. They rushed open, spilling the tension-filled air onto her face. She walked in, leaving her presence unknown, and observed the events unfolding.
"I don't know how these guys keep escaping! I need to head over to the cells afterwards and up their security measures." Cyborg gasped in annoyed disbelief.
A portrait of Plasmus hung on the screen of their giant monitor, his face twisted into unbound rage.
"He's near the mall, but he's moving fast," Replied Robin, reading the coordinates from the screen.
"Well let us go kick the butt!" Starfire exclaimed, the adrenaline clearly pumping through her veins.
"Yeah, let's go show this guy why he shouldn't mess with the Teen Titans!" replied Beastboy, changing into a bat and heading out the door behind Starfire. Cyborg soon followed, but not before swiping his keys to the T-car.
Raven turned awkwardly, semi-used to having her presence ignored. She walked to the door, not having the strength to levitate herself just yet.
"Raven?" Her eyes widened at the concerned tone her name was spoken with. She turned slowly, double-checking to see that her hood was steady atop her head.
It was Robin who had spoke her name, his eyes a sheer vessel of anxiousness. "Is everything all right?"
"Yes, Why wouldn't it be?" She spoke, her voice sounding a little too rushed, yet it was still missing the musical tone of liveliness.
Robin hesitated for a moment, slightly angered at the fact that he could not view Raven's face for any emotion. "Well, it's just this morning I came to your room and I knocked and there was no answer." He waited patiently for a response, but Raven was a stone wall of silence. "I didn't take you as a heavy sleeper." He smiled, decided to pipe up at the last moment.
Raven, seeing her way out at the last statement thought fast, though her thoughts continued to weigh her down. "Yeah? Well I am." She replied a little to harshly, still her voice had no emotion.
"Hey you guys coming or what?" Cyborg yelled, his voice slowly fading away as he distanced himself from the pair.
Without another word, Raven turned away from Robin's hurt expression and ran through the door. As soon as she was in the hall she jumped into the air, activating her powers of levitation. Yet she was alarmed and dumbfounded when she felt her feet hit the floor again.
What the...? Eyes widening in realization she knew the illness that had befallen her. Her powers, exhausted from the force and weight of each sudden emotion, transgressed from the black aura that was Raven.
"Cyborg!" She called out, surprised at how quickly the idea had come to her.
Cyborg, his titanic body crowding the hallway slowed to a jog. "Yeah?"
"Um, can I ride in the T-car with you?" She inquired, still embarrassed by her weakness.
Cyborg shot her a puzzled glance. "Yeah, sure, I guess."
Raven released a bulky breath that she had not known to be lingering in her lungs. They hopped into the T-car fluidly, knowing fully well that their other teammates were already half way to their destination.
Cyborg revved the engine and without a word, sped off, the heinous hip hop music pumping through the speakers.
They arrived shortly afterwards, surveying the scene and checking for weak spots around their enemy.
Cyborg ran, head first, into the action, sonic cannon blasting stunningly. Beastboy was dodging acidic sludge being spewed from the pungent mouth of Plasmus while Starfire hurled an industrial sized garbage trough into his side. Robin, cape waving wildly behind him, had thrown a series of disc bombs and was in the process of extending his bo staff into the gut of their foe.
Raven stood, protected by the T-car, unsure of how she should handle the situation. She had to try! Otherwise the whole team would find out, especially Robin, who seemed like the most important of the team, to her, at the moment.
But what can I do? I'm just like a defenseless human! But...what's the point? Her momentarily forgotten depression crashing into her ferociously. This could be the way...This is the way.
Striding near Plasmus she straightened her cloak, not fully understanding her purpose for doing so. Plasmus caught sight of her not soon afterwards and grinned mischieviously.
This is it. She thought, not feeling happy, not feeling anything. The numbness spread throughout her body, forcing her to halt her steps. It didn't matter, her sweet escape already had her in his views and was now winding up for a tremendous strike.
He opened his mouth, spitting a wave of toxic sludge at her. This was it. The end. A smile tugged at her lips as she saw the beautiful sight of her demise.
THE END OF CHAPTER 21!!
and no! It doesn't end there! God you would all hate me if it ended there right?! haha wow, anyways I know it was major depressing but the next chapter has some robin/raven...well you know what...till next time friends!!