So I made it out of pools just like I planned. Besides Amsa , no other player scratched me. Maybe they were all practicing for Smash 4 or something. I made it to Top 8 without facing any of the "gods "even once. Oh right , I actually have a match today. That Salty Suite thing with that chillindude guy. I woke up and got my GameCube controller. Sigh , did I really have to face this has been? Even facing Ken would be more of a challenge. Only reason why he is even remotely popular is because of that documentary. I went to the TV to see a large crowd gathered around. My opponent was there was a large smirk on his face.
Obviously something was up. What did he switch the gamecube with a hidden Wii U or something? No one smiles when they are about to get JV5'd. Chillindude held out his hand for a handshake for about a minute. Why would I handshake this loser? I might get his loser germs or something. He saltily withdrew his hand. Scar came up to mic and asked me about the match. He should probably lay off the cologne. I responded with "5-0. That's all that needs to be said". Chillindude then smirked and started laughing. He grabbed the mic from Scar and stood up.
"Fine then , let's make it a little interesting if you think it'll be that easy. How about a duct tape death match? If you win then I'll give up playing fox for good and give you $500." Chillindude smirked, "However, if I win… you'll have to be my dog. Arf Arf." As I suspected, he's high. He pointed the mic at the crowd and it roared in approval. "So you're awfully silent. Don't chicken out on me now , Leffen. You said you were going to 5-0 me, right?" The crowd started chanting Chillindude and duct tape death match. There was no way out. I took the mic from him , " I'll beat you , anytime , anywhere , any game. Delaying the match with your trash-talk isn't going to help your chances." Scar came back on the stage with a roll of duct tape.
Scar announced, "Now for the rules of the match. It's going to be a best of 5 and the first ever duct tape death match in salty suite history. Each player will have their left hand duct taped to their back. Now why is it called a death match? Because when this was done in League , the player lost the ability to use his left hand efficiently. The stakes are high for this already unprecedented match!" The crowd roared in approval and started their deafening chants of "chillindude!".
Scar put the tape on both of us and tested it to make sure it held our hands in place. He then gave a thumbs up to signal the start of the match. We had already decided to skip handwarmers and we went straight into the match. Shit! I could barely move my character. Chillindude was waveshining like a pro with only one hand. How is that even possible?!
Damnit. It was a trap , he knew he couldn't win so that's why he suggested this matchup. He had practiced for maybe 2 months or more. He got an upthrow-upair combo and my stock was gone. I only managed to get a few lasers on him. If the crowd was uproarious before , it went absolutely bezerk when that happened. I need to find a way to practice my techs with this new control method. Usually , there is a seamless transition between attacking and movement. In this match , however , the transition between attacking and movement takes roughly 4 seconds. This means that I can't just rush in like I usually do. I stayed back for a while and camped him. Lazer , shine , run to the other side. The Mew2King special. He was at kill percentage now and visibly pissed. I faked an upthrow upair and he panick-airdodged into my uptilt.
The crowd faltered as their hero lost his first stock. You could hear chillindude's heavy breathing now. The more I played the match , the faster the transition went. The time was reduced to 1 second now. My mind had just adjusted to the new variable in play. As soon as I adjusted , It was over for chillindude. I finished up the match with a 5-0 , just like I predicted. Scar got up on stage and gave the mic to me. I said to chillindude , "You couldn't beat me , even if you tied both my hands up." I got up and walked out of the room. The crowd went crazy with chants of "Leffen" and some boos from the chillin-boyz.