Thank you for all the lovely comments so far! Sorry it took a while with this chapter, will try and be quicker with the next one.

Kensi was vaguely aware of a commotion going on around her. God it was irritating. All she wanted was to drift off to sleep. She was so comfortable. If only the noise would stop, she could just fade away. As the noise continued she began to feel a dull ache throb though her body. She couldn't place the pain, radiating from her shoulder and head, and reverberating around her chest. It seemed to be everywhere. Why did she hurt so much? What was happening?

The noise around her was becoming clearer. As the pain escalated with each passing second, so did the clarity with which she could hear the voices. She recognised those voices. It was Deeks, Deeks and Callen. As she listened, she heard the agony in their words. Deeks' soft whispers, his desperate pleads, tearing into her as she tried to work out what was happening.

Her senses were coming back to her one by one, first the pain, and then the hearing. Now she was aware of the burning cold. She couldn't cope with the pain of it all, the pull of the darkness was so comforting, just to escape her agony.

But she wasn't the only one suffering. She could hear it in Deeks' every syllable. He was being torn apart, and she wasn't going to be responsible for that.

Her body took a sudden gasp of air.

She felt the shift in the atmosphere around her, the hope that sparked in Deeks' heart, felt some of his pain fade.

She took another breath, and suddenly her body reacted, expelling the water from her lungs.

Finally she opened her eyes.

"Kensi?" Deeks whispered her name, hardly believing she was awake.

Kensi opened her mouth to speak but began to cough instead. Each cough sent waves of pain through her body. She felt Deeks' gentle hands pull her into sitting, and she fell back against him, impossibly exhausted.

She tried to speak again. "Deeks, I'm sorry Deeks."

…

Deeks was grinning at his indestructable girl, his heart pounding with happiness at the life that now ran through her. Despite his happiness, he was still terrified for her as she struggled to take a breath through her coughing. Her pain cut him so deeply. He gently placed his hands under her back and raised her to sitting, positioning himself behind her so that she could lean on him. Quickly her coughing abated and to his surprise she whispered an apology.

"No Kensi. You're alive, never be sorry for that." Then he looked to Sam, who was helping Callen get to his feet. The large man's face was still creased with concern, and who could blame him. He was the only able bodied member of the team left. Callen had been in the river, Deeks was definitely concussed, and Kensi had just been brought back from the brink of death.

Sam knelt down beside Deeks and Kensi, sliding his hands under her and lifting her from the ground. Despite the thick layer of clothing between him and her, he could feel the coldness of her body seeping through the material. Deeks and Callen were immediately behind, supporting each other to the chopper.

Sam carefully placed his precious load on the hard base of the helicopter, trying to ease the pain she must be in. She had not spoken since he had picked her up, and her eyes were dangerously close to closing. "Hey, Kensi, you stay awake for a bit longer okay?" He gave her a gentle nudge.

Kensi gave the softest hint of a smile. "I know Sam."

Before Callen had even pulled his legs into the chopper they were taking off, and finally Sam could slam the door on the cold wind and they could begin the patch up process as best as possible with the supplies they had.

Deeks sat beside Kensi, clutching the hand of the arm that had not been shot. Callen had tried to examine his head but he had refused, demanding that Kensi got the help first. Kensi needed the help. She was icy cold, her breathing ragged and her shoulder still bleeding heavily. Deeks could do nothing. His initial elation at her consciousness had lapsed into a terrible fear. No matter how strong Kensi was, there were always injuries that could be stronger. He leant to kiss her on the head, willing his actions to remove some of the pain she must be in. She was so quiet, and only when he was looking into her eyes and seeing her look back was he sure that she was still conscious.

….

She couldn't believe that pain could ever be this bad. She must be feeling the agony of every person in the world. Everything burned as she began to thaw, her entire body blazing. Each breath hurt so much that it demanded a mountain of willpower and determination in order to convince herself that it was worth it. At least her shoulder wasn't so bad. She had been shot before, she was used to that kind of pain. But it was too much. She couldn't bear it for much longer. With each second it was harder to stay awake. She was barely aware of Sam pushing hard on her shoulder, or of Callen's gentle touch as he dried her off. She couldn't let go yet though, she had to talk to him first.

With an immense amount of effort she turned to look at Deeks, suddenly becoming aware of his hand in hers. She squeezed in gratefully.

"I'm sorry." She said it again. Deeks tried to interrupt her, but she stopped him. "I'm sorry about us Deeks. I…" she hesitated and he squeezed her hand again, giving her the confidence to carry on, "… I care about you so much Deeks. When I thought you were dead I couldn't think of life in a way that made sense anymore. You've changed me Deeks. I'm so much better with you. I'm sorry it took me so long to see that." She slumped back exhausted, unable to say any more.

"I'm sorry too." Deeks' spoke with nothing more than a whisper, but she heard him. It was the last thing she heard before the darkness closed in.