Chapter 22

Strong Enough

Shaking her head disapprovingly at him,

"Look everything I do in my life is not some giant conspiracy against you."

She calmly, but curtly revealed to him.

Wagging her finger as she rebuked his criticism,

"And if you recall, it was your decision not to know every little sorted detail about my life…"

Surrendering, he slapped his hand against his thigh,

"Fine."

Shane brushed past her and headed for the door.

Watching him go, Kimberly hurled another defiant blow at him.

"You know it's funny because in the past,

there are a lot of little things that you didn't want to know."

Shane abandoned his retreat to the front door of the guesthouse and marched back towards her.

"What exactly is that supposed to mean?"

~ April 10th, 1986

Location: Donovan Manor

Stumbling out of bed in a hurry, Shane groped around for his black velvet robe as Peachy quickly filled him in.

"I rang Dr. Wellington, who is going to meet us at the hospital here in town." She explained breathlessly. "The Lassie," The old woman almost choked up. "Shane, I could hear her coughing on the other side of the wall." Peachy gestured with her right hand pointing down the hall. Shane hadn't thought of something for his bare feet until he stepped off the Victorian area rug that lay beneath the bed. "Then I heard her cry out in pain…" Shane's eyes widened with concern. "That's when I ran to see what was wrong."

Shane patted Peachy's left shoulder approvingly and lunged for the door to their room across the hall. The older woman threw up her hand halting his entrance. "Laddie, she's a mess." Peachy warned him; her usually neutral eyes betraying the gravity of the situation. A ragged cough and intermittent wincing cries greeted him through the closed wooden door. Shane clinched his teeth to harness his emotions before charging through it. Slumped over to her right side in almost fetal position with her arms wrapped tightly around her body at a futile attempt to generate warmth, Kimberly shook uncontrollably as beads of sweat danced across her forehead. With each rattling cough, she whimpered in pain.

"My god! Kimberly!" Shane rushed over kneeling next to the bed taking her face into his hands. She felt clammy to the touch; heavy dark circles hung relentlessly under her lifeless blue eyes. Shane's eyes surveyed Kim's appearance briefly. Doubled over on her side, Kimberly cried out in pain each time a labored cough ravaged her body. Peachy approached with her coat, but Shane waved his hand to halt the process while he examined what was causing such excruciating discomfort.

"Darling, let me have a look." He requested soothingly as he slid his left arm around her. Cradling her head and upper torso against him, Shane removed the heavy blankets from her body. Kimberly's head tossed to and fro as she began to mutter a protest against the action. Too focused on discovering the source of her pain, he mistook the resistance as her trademark stubbornness considering how things progressed earlier between them. Eyes squeezed tightly shut; Kimberly began vehemently shaking her head 'no' using her hands to push him away.

"Just go away." She pleaded quietly in child-like fashion. "Just go away." She whimpered in defeat.

"Shhhh, Kim, this will only take a minute. Don't fight me now." He insisted with a low, relaxing voice.

Her whole body tensed up at his request.

Then, she began to tremble uncontrollably as Shane lifted her blue silk pajama shirt. A horrifying shrill like that of a wounded animal echoed throughout the room as his hand lightly pressed against her bare stomach.

"I said, 'NNNO!" She wailed triggering another wretched cough. Her eyes flew open, yet Kimberly still pushed against a bewildered Shane who attempted to calm her down without incorporating physical restraint. There was no light in her eyes; blank and terrified, she looked straight through him. With a clinched jaw, Kimberly spewed: "Don't you force me!"

There was that word again, 'force.' And instantly he knew where her mind was and it wasn't at Donovan Manor. Shane let go completely and stepped back aghast by the realization of what he had witnessed. Kimberly collapsed back onto the bed gulping great big desperate sobs as the full weight of what all had just witnessed crashed down before them. For a split second, Shane felt paralyzed as to what to do for fear he would make things worse. Peachy stood motionless a few feet from him with her hands still covering her gaping mouth. Tears streamed down the older woman's cheek. Resolutely, Shane regained his composure.

Kneeling gingerly next to Kimberly who wept quietly on the bed, Shane reached for her shoulders to maneuver her face back to his line of vision. At first, she flinched in fear.

"Kimberly, it's me Shane…Shane." He emphasized tenderly refusing to give up. Sliding his left arm up underneath her right arm and around her back to steady her in a protective embrace, Shane used his right hand to cradle her face whose wide translucent eyes betrayed a healthy amount of skepticism aimed in his direction. Still blinded by the force of her memory, Kimberly's whole body remained tense before relaxing ever so slightly at his assurances. "You're here safe at Donovan Manor." Shane whispered her confidently; his nose almost touched hers as his eyes locked into her eyes. But under his breath, he fervently prayed for recognition. In a calm, steady voice he added out loud, "No one can hurt you now."

Kimberly stopped fighting him, but remained silent staring blankly into his compassionate eyes. Almost wondering if he could ever reach her as the seconds ticked slowly by, Shane slightly panicked. His thumb stroked at her tear-stained cheek with his eyes begging for her to say something, anything that would convey that the unspeakable moment had past.

And just as quickly as the memory was triggered, Kimberly's eyes blinked with recognition. A faint, but grateful smile formed along her lips.

"You?" She whispered hoarsely reaching up frantically to cling to his shirt. "Thank god, it's you." Kimberly acknowledged through a flow of weary tears still shaking from the experience.

It was the sweetest answer to a prayer the spy had ever known.

"Yes, it's me, darling." Shane gushed in relief. Pulling her protectively into his arms, he hugged her generously burying his head into her hair as he stroked it.

"Please don't leave me." She pleaded weakly—clearly still terrorized from the grim memory before another cough rippled through her body.

"Shhhh, of course I won't. I'm here…"

Consoling her gently and then assuring Kimberly emphatically, "And I'm not going anywhere."

Behind the fogginess of her high fever, Kimberly trusted in his promise. Her head fell into him as Shane rocked her slowly back and forth. Once he felt secure that the chaos had past, he left Kimberly with Peachy, who began dressing her for the ride, so he could rush back to throw some clothes on.

Returning quickly, not a word was uttered between Peachy and Shane as they wrapped the heavy woolen coat around her. Kimberly moaned miserably as she was being maneuvered around. Doting over her, Shane carried her to the car. The drive was eerily silent except for the intermittent wheezing and coughing emanating from Kimberly followed by a low whimpering expression of pain. Peachy drove with Shane in the backseat of the Bentley cradling a half-dozing Kimberly securely in his arms. Though he methodically stroked her hair and held her in his arms with such confidence and calm manner, Shane looked straight ahead dumbstruck from the experience.

Location: Hospital, near Cheltenham

Peachy entered the sparsely decorated hospital lounge with two paper cups filled with what the hospital deemed coffee. She found her partner in the far corner of the expansive room facing out the prison-like window into the cold, desolate winter night. He had not bothered to remove his grey trench coat since their arrival, more consumed with when he could get answers from hospital staff regarding Kim's condition. His arms crossed firmly across his chest and his jaw clinched; Shane wore a stern expression on his face.

"Here, take this." Peachy instructed handing him the cup. "Any word on the Lass, yet?"

His expression softened a bit at the sight of a familiar face but he shook his head negatively before turning his attention back towards the window that reflected his threatening demeanor back towards the only two occupants in the room. Taking a healthy sip of the hot liquid, Shane's face contorted in a most grotesque fashion.

"Dear god, Peachy! That is most dreadful!" He proclaimed almost spitting out the black watery imitation. The sight amused the elder spy, who couldn't restrain a boisterous laugh.

"I'm afraid they strained only one coffee bean through the filter for this brew." She mused dryly as Shane drifted back into his turbulent thoughts. Peachy wrapped her arm around his left and motioned for them to take a seat on the faded teal-colored couch centered oddly in the middle of the room. "Come sit with me Laddie. If you stare at that pane of glass much longer, the penetration will vaporize it." She quipped light-heartedly. "It's drafty enough as it is."

Peachy's eyes scanned the room lit up by garish fluorescent lights. Tightening her black woolen coat sash around her waist, she attempted recline comfortably into the well-worn couch. Discarding his heavy coat, Shane sat to Peachy's right. After several minutes of allowing him to stare at the square speckled tiles of the floor, she swatted his right knee,

"Alright." She demanded authoritatively. "Out with it!"

Shane lifted his eyes to his right to see her chin lifted resolutely, lips pressed tightly into a thin line, and her beady eyes relentlessly interrogating him. He wasn't getting out of this confrontation. Not tonight.

Brushing off tiny specks of lint from his black trousers, Shane leaned forward propping his elbows on his knees so he could rest his weary head into his hands. The drive to the hospital allowed certain uncomfortable truths to reveal themselves unfettered by his ability to hold them at bay. The usually composed spy felt completely at loss as to what to say. This was much harder than he had ever anticipated. Crestfallen, he observed quietly,

"I really thought that she was getting better."

Peachy's eyes widen in surprise as she studied him. "Ah, Bah!" She scolded as she swatted him on the right shoulder. "This is perfectly normal under the circumstances." Though Peachy's voice grew grave as she added, "But nonetheless disconcerting to witness, isn't it?" She noted astutely.

Slowly Shane nodded affirmatively but retained a rather confused expression across his face in regards to Peachy's assertion.

Exhaling heavily, "The abject terror in her eyes…"

"Yes?"

"I caused that." He sighed in defeat.

"Don't do that." Peachy admonished sensibly with her eyes trained squarely on him. Shane turned his head to the right making eye contact as she continued. "You've caused a lot of things in your life, but that…that is the fault of the one who did those wretched things to the poor girl all those years ago."

Shane exhaled once more and clasping his hands together, he turned his attention towards the mundane landscape print hanging on the wall directly in front of them. It's muted colors served to highlight the depressing atmosphere of the stark waiting room.

"Point taken." He acknowledge soberly. "But it sure feels as though I played a role in hurting her all over again tonight." He explained solemnly. "Something I have tended to do here lately…" Shane shook his head in disbelief as his words drifted off. Peachy sighed sympathetically, but narrowed her brow at him in partial disagreement.

"Laddie, these things are perfectly normal for survivors and necessary if they are going to get through it, so I'm afraid Kimberly experiences this whether you're present or not."

Shane's eyes widened at the thought of Kimberly enduring such traumatic episodes alone. She had always been plagued with nightmares throughout their relationship, but tonight it began to dawn on him just how threatening the darkness could be for her. It was reminiscent to what agents in the field faced on assignment. When cases went south, agents frequently faced capture, torture, and sometimes death. Depending on the situation, loved ones could be brought in to facilitate the process…something Shane had fought in vain to prevent in his own life. And from Shane's perspective, death might have been the most merciful thing for some of the poor souls. It was an aspect of the job that was never openly discussed among spies, but the effects of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder rippled throughout the field. Only, for Kimberly these battle scars were inflicted, not by an avowed enemy on a mission or battlefield, but in the place where one should always feel safe and loved: home.

"You know, she liked to throw her past in my face from time to time and I always assumed she was referring to her time in Europe…" A belabored sigh wrestled free from between his clenched jaw. "Using it as a means to push me away."

Peachy remained silent listening sympathetically to his lamentation.

"The prostitute and the spy." He chuckled bitterly. "We're quite adept in keeping secrets…" Still looking into the individual brush strokes of the landscape before them, he was completely lost in his thoughts. His voice dropped to just above a whisper, "Yet, able to reach one another in a way that no other would or could..."

"And it never occurred to you the significance of her line of work?" Peachy interjected pointedly. Her tone was reminiscent of the early days of instruction when Shane was still an underling in the ISA.

"Yes, of course…" He replied somewhat defensively as Shane understood where the conversation was heading. He was wise enough to make the connection between Kim's victimization throughout her childhood and her choice to seduce men in her adulthood. It was simply easier to focus on Kim's ability to manipulate men as an adult since as a spy; he employed similar tactics from time to time. To address the former opened a Pandora's box unearthing things that the spy instinctively knew his love couldn't easily erase. Venturing too far into that abyss made the spy feel weak and it wasn't a pleasant place to be. Somewhere deep in his soul though, he knew better and Shane clung to the hope that the matter would resolve on its own.

"But it…I…" He stumbled over his words and finally fell silent feeling incredibly stupid and harsh all at the same time. Slowly, Shane's expression softened into an eager pupil. His pain-stricken eyes betrayed a need to understand encouraging Peachy to enlighten the spy on the matter. She had given both of them reasonable length of time to arrive at this place, so there was no harm in giving fate a little push under the extreme circumstances. "Are you aware of exactly what you saw in that room tonight?"

"Yes," He answered slowly and with a bit of apprehension. Peachy leaned forward knowingly,

"What's your earliest memory, Laddie?"

Shane glanced her way puzzled by the seemingly unrelated question.

"Just answer it." She insisted and while Shane pondered a moment, Peachy offered hers. "I think mid-summer walks along the bloomin' bell heather with meh Pop." Peachy revealed poignantly. "Wasn't more than a little lass myself, maybe two or three. But I remember the firm grip of his hand as we scurried through the faint dirt trails along the Scottish Highlands." Smiling faintly, but rather sweetly due to the joy of the memory, "The vibrant purple of those flowers against the backdrop of a crystal blue sky is still etched in my mind."

Shane smiled empathetically at Peachy and easily became absorbed in the nostalgia from tales of their mutual childhoods. There was something quite intoxicating and carefree about taking short trips back through time.

"The smell of pipe tobacco always takes me right back into the study sitting at Father's knee as he worked at that old mahogany desk." He offered nostalgically. "Or Mother's humming as she sewed by the fireplace."

Peachy allowed the sweet memories to linger around them for a bit before continuing.

"And what about Kimberly's?" She questioned soberly. "What do you suppose fills her mind?" Her eyes were bright with revelation.

'I don't recall." He admitted with trepidation realizing that he did not know the answer. Shane wasn't sure what bothered him more: that he could possibly not know something so important about the woman he loved, or that the answer was so damaging that he might not be able to handle its ramifications.

"The Lassie, you see…" Her eyes filled with tears as the maternal drive to protect her child threatened Peachy's ability to properly instruct the son she had unofficially taken as her own. "Remembers her uncle whispering into her ear in the darkness of her bedroom…"

Shane leaned back in horror.

"That poor baby lay perfectly still and prayed that he would just go away..." Peachy was absorbed in the memory now—piecing it together her gaze fell to the side. "And when she attempted to fight back, he had a way of reminding her of the crib nearby." Her old gray eyes searched Shane to see if he caught the meaning.

"Kayla's…" Shane interjected squeezing his eyes shut as the realization sunk in. Through the years, he had learned rather devastatingly how far Kimberly would go to protect those she loved from pain…

"I need you to try and understand…" She pleaded as he rejected her explanation.

"I said, 'I didn't want him'. I despise the man!" She cried wretchedly. Her eyes burning bright in despair as the betrayal's effects on the couple cruelly ripped them apart.

"Don't you remember? In Miami, you were locked in the study." She whimpered. ~ March, 1986

Peachy nodded as he rubbed his temples in disgust. The old woman choked back tears at the horror of the situation. "And that's what you witnessed back there."

"I didn't realize," He stumbled over his words as the emotion filtered to the surface. "I mean I…" Faltering, he searched his partner for help. "And she told you this?" His eyes dripped with anguish.

"Yes." Peachy replied poignantly. "A long time ago…once when she couldn't sleep."

Though the notion wasn't foreign to him, the impact of how close the two women were hit him hard suddenly. God knows what lessons were learned within the walls of that guesthouse. Lessons he had failed to heed…

"What's that supposed to mean?" He stormed towards her.

"That we ALL make mistakes and you just made a big one: You thought I was somebody else."

Shane scoffed, "What are you talking about? Who do I think you were?"

"I don't know." She motioned helplessly with her hands. "Somebody you just dreamed up without flaws, without a past."

"Oh Kimberly, for Heaven's sakes! Don't drag your past into this!" He deflected in exasperation. "I'm talking about your bloody little secrets!"

"Well my bloody little secrets are a part of my past." She corrected sternly following behind as he walked away. ~April 10, 1986

At the time, Shane had no idea that Kimberly carried the burden of her mother's secrets on her shoulders as well as her own. With his anger focused squarely on her lies and more specifically her liaison with Victor in Miami, it had been impossible for him to see the bigger picture at how his competitiveness had yielded a blind spot in regards to his personal life.

"These things just sort of drip out of her, you know?" Peachy was saying as his mind replayed the argument from their past.

But Shane didn't know. His mind was lost in a maze of past conversations, connecting the dots to events that seemed unrelated at first, but became more focused as he began to peel away at the layers of the woman that he professed to love. He prided himself on being the one person who knew Kimberly better than anyone else on the planet, so it bothered him that there were pieces of her—even if they were hideously ugly, that she kept hidden from him. And as he sat uncomfortably on the hospital couch, it occurred to Shane that she did so at his unspoken request.

Abruptly rising into standing position, he felt the urge to punch something, anything to release the anger that surged within his soul.

"I never knew.' He confessed monotonously pacing back and forth. "Why couldn't she…"

"Because I listen." Peachy interrupted matter-of-factly sniffling and wiping her tears away. Her posture stiffening, "A lady shouldn't blubber in public," Peachy rationed to herself. Her answer smacked him in the face.

"Why, I…" Shane started to protest, but Peachy's knowing expression cut through the spy's righteous indignation. Kimberly's words rippled back through the spy's psyche to a time when she had attempted to do so…

"Listen. I grew up…I tried so hard not to rock the boat." She explained emphatically. There was a look in her eyes desperate for him to show her some compassion over the matter. "And I really believed that was the way to keep my family together," And instantly her tone grew bitter, "With these BLOODY LITTLE SECRETS."

Shane's impatient sighed only intensified her bitterness, which in turn caused Kimberly to abandon any appeal to his humanity. Instead, she leveled a scathing indictment against him,

"You act like the first secret I ever had was in Miami," Her voice grew melancholy as she rejected the implied assertion of his recent charges against her. "And we both know that isn't true…"

"It isn't meant to be harsh, my son." Peachy added compassionately watching Shane closely and sensing the weight of his folly overtake him. It was rare for his partner to abandon all protocol and address him maternally. The thickness of her voice punctuated the deep affection the woman had for her protégé who had eventually become her boss.

The old woman had been privy to at least a few battles between the two lovers over the years and the one thing she knew about Shane was his resistance to diving in too deeply when it pertained to emotional quagmires. She had witnessed the pattern before when Emma died as well as his parents. The behavior was a common thread within the agency. The simple fact was that emotional ties were detrimental to the job and more so, when the object of a spy's affections carried a whole other set of emotional baggage. Thus, most agents tended to be loners riddled with lives mired in broken hearts, marriages, and families. The rare agent who managed to escape the desolate life and maintain a family were the ones whose significant other had the patience of Job and a kept a serene household that offered a brief solace from the harsh realities of the job. Obviously, becoming involved with a woman like Kimberly created certain roadblocks for creating that sort of home-life…but definitely not unattainable in the old woman's mind. Peachy's eyes met Shane's eyes with an understanding and recognition of the problem.

"Oh Laddie," The wise woman cooed. "I'm afraid you've been very good at most every other aspect of Kimberly's needs, but son, you still don't see the big picture here."

"Which is?" Shane's benevolent eyes tore through Peachy.

"Uncle Eric." Peachy replied sharply. "How did you reconcile that?" She asked narrowing her brow skeptically.

Shane abruptly stood and stepped away from Peachy. His mind had tied him to conversations from the past. Past indictments echoed throughout the room.

"And maybe the reason I didn't tell you about this one is because you never really wanted to listen to the others." She confessed in a hushed voice. ~ April 10,1986

Kimberly had detected something about the limits of his love that even Shane wasn't prepared to admit: an unwillingness to learn and understand what precipitated those days in Europe even after she blurted out the repulsive truth inside the safety of his apartment on that winter day.

"I know because he did the same thing to me!"

Though not completely surprising, the explosive revelation still hit the normally stoic spy pretty hard.

"Oh,… dear god." Shane managed to force out.

Shane wasn't quite sure how to take the information. Thus, he quickly shifted the focus on something he deemed productive and more pressing: Kimberly notifying the police so that the monster would not continue to molest other little girls.

"I can tell you this: you're no longer a victim anymore." He had proclaimed magnanimously." You can put that behind you now." ~December 29, 1984

Although his observation had come from a sincere and heartfelt place, in hindsight, he shuddered at how flippant it sounded to him now.

"I never did." Shane finally admitted as he slowly turned his head back towards his partner. "I just assumed it was…" He choked on the last words, " In the past."

After that, it seemed to dissipate into this little detail tucked away in the basement of Kim's soul…and his psyche. Why ruin a good thing? Except by Shane repeatedly avoiding the issue of Uncle Eric, the problem simply festered before exploding into their relationship in the most destructive ways.

And he shuddered at how flimsy his logic had been—especially with what he knew now and had experienced with Kimberly regarding the effects of sexual abuse. Her subsequent accusation in the guesthouse that Shane had dreamed up some sort of fairytale explanation surrounding her past possessed some merit.

"Then, how can you hold Kimberly to a standard that you can't meet because of your own discomfort over the matter?" Peachy questioned astutely. Shane's eyes lifted abruptly to meet hers. "The Lassie has locked away so many things..." She added carefully. "I imagine that has to be quite terrifying to experience again." And then zeroing in on the heart of the matter, Peachy's voice grew grave. " But knowing Kimberly as we do, I suspect she's more terrified at how others will perceive them."

Peachy's razor-sharp observation reached its intended target perfectly for the weight of what the old woman was asking of him settled onto the spy like the heavy London fog.

Rising, Shane sought refuge again at the dark hollow window that he had stood at earlier. Frost crept sinisterly across the pane of glass as the nighttime temperatures continued to plummet blocking Shane's reflection from blackened window. Peachy silently approached from behind placing her hand encouragingly on her partner's back for support. He crossed his arms across his chest contemplatively for a moment, but when it appeared to him that his partner's penetrating stare wasn't about to let up, he quipped softly:

"Peachy, ole' girl. I think you'd have made an excellent therapist." He teased light-heartedly to break the tension.

"Hush up boy!" She nudged him playfully and tilting her head towards him shrewdly, "You're not the only one who picks Dr. Evan's ear from time to time."

"And I'm forever grateful that you do." He replied softly. Shane's trademark dimple appeared briefly as a lopsided half grin fleetingly crossed over his face. The levity of the remark was short-lived as the melancholy seeped back into the room while waiting for word regarding Kimberly's condition. The two spies stood side by side for a moment in the barren stillness of the room before Dr. Wellington entered and interrupted their meditative stance.

"I have news." He proclaimed clapping his hands together. The two brooding spies gave him their undivided attention as Edward announced, "We've eliminated the leukemia possibility definitively…"

"Definitively?" Shane repeated as he cocked his head slightly.

Edward nodded exposing a proud smile but raised his finger to punctuate the next caveat. "But I would like for her to remain here for the remainder of the night to see how she progresses on the round of antibiotics that we have administered."

Shane briefly turned his attention to Peachy. "See if Walker has obtained Collier's location. I'd like to give him a call."

Peachy nodded affirmatively and retreated leaving the two men alone.

"Follow me." Edward instructed as the two left the sterile waiting area and walked briskly down the hall. "Kimberly was dehydrated," Raising his hand in assurance, "Even with the best care, it can escalate rapidly in these particular cases…"

"She's stubborn." Shane interjected wryly causing a smirk to escape Edward's otherwise even expression.

"So we've placed an IV in to go along with treatment…"

"Pneumonia?" Shane interjected.

"Yes." Edward paused eyeing his old friend intently. "And a pretty nasty case as you're about to see." Dr. Wellington guided Shane into a small room for viewing x-rays. Flipping two sets onto the screen, he flipped on the light. Gesturing to his left, " Her lungs…" Which revealed the fluid build-up, "And this here…" Edward pointed with a pen to the fractures from two of Kim's ribs. Shane studied the x-rays intently as the doctor continued, "Clearly, this is an old injury that has been re-fractured…"

"Kim was hit by a car no more than eighteen months ago." He revealed.

"That would do it." Edward noted dryly and reading Shane's incredulous expression as to how she could re-fracture the ribs, "The force of her coughing." He admitted. "It happens. I've seen pregnant patients arrive with cracked ribs due to the fetus kicking…."

Shane smiled knowingly as Dr. Wellington continued to explain that Kimberly had been given a sedative to help her rest. It was a wonder Andrew hadn't caused that with Kimberly given his robust kicking motions during her pregnancy. It was no accident that the boy was his league's best kicker.

Edward escorted Shane to the elevator and to Kim's room on the floor above. The hope was that combining the fluids, antibiotics and rest would aid in eliminating the persistent fever that had plagued the woman for over a week now. Propping his arm against the doorframe, Shane rested his weary head against it as the spy peered into the tranquil room debating whether he should enter. Observing her closely, he watched as Kim's chest rhythmically rose and fell with each shallow breath. Her arms rested by her sides above the heavy pale blue hospital linens. Her head fallen to her right side and away from him, Kimberly's disheveled wavy locks barely masked the serious expression she wore despite her sedated state. Shane's mind spun with mangled thoughts and feelings induced from the night's events and his previous conversation with Peachy. Coming to grips with Kimberly's past meant more than simply helping her through the recovery process…if she would allow him. Feelings of frustration and anger melted away as he traced the outline of her face with his eyes. It sent his mind to a much more tranquil and inviting evening after a playful night of lovemaking…

"I never want to be apart from you again." She whispered breathlessly. "For the first time I feel so safe, so protected with you…" Her eyes were bright with adoration, "And I have never felt so completely loved."

And he responded with a kiss so tender that she felt as light as a feather. Continuing to seal his undying commitment to his ladylove…

"I love you…" And his lips graced hers once more to punctuate his sincerity, "Protect you forever," He stroked her hair with his left hand amorously as their intimate declarations continued…

"Will you?" She replied eagerly.

"As long as you let me." He proclaimed earnestly. "And beyond."

"Well that's a looong time." She replied dreamily with an enraptured expression that perfectly matched his.

"Not long enough." He assured her before slipping his hands around her bare shoulders to pull her into another all-consuming kiss.~ September 1985

It was absolutely astonishing that he could cause that exquisite creature to feel so alive and free when it was she that had renewed his life. Then, a haunting realization struck the beleaguered spy: he couldn't recall the last time Kimberly's face had worn such a bright and carefree expression?

"Laddie?" Peachy tapped his shoulder breaking his concentration. Shane whirled around to see her holding a slip of paper in her hand.

"Thanks, Peach." He replied graciously still dazed by the insight. His eyes briefly darted longingly back at Kimberly.

"I'll stay here until you get back." The old woman assured him. Shane turned his attention back to Peachy as his sad eyes smiled appreciatively at her. Reluctantly, Shane headed down the hall to the nurse's station to place the call…