Confident Blades
The grey clouds that loomed overhead had brought a fierce wind with them. The ocean had just come into view, its surface churning madly as the wind and incoming storm gave the waves much more power than they normally would have. The sound the water made as it crashed against the rocky shore was hypnotizing. She was walking along the edge of the cliff, jagged and ugly, gray except for the peppered green of stubborn vegetation that clung to it. It was quite a miserable day, the wind whipping around her, tugging her strands of golden starlight one way or the other about her face. As she approached the edge of the cliff, the wind seemed to redouble its efforts upon her, directing its forces to push and pull her closer until she finally tumbled over the edge and into the angry waves that lapped hungrily against the stone daggers protruding from the depths of the ocean.
Numina stopped with her toes on the line between rock and emptiness. The salty air filled her lungs as she took deep breaths, remaining calm though her thoughts swirled like the ugly blue mass of the ocean below her. Her mind kept running back to one thing though: a dagger and a note.
It had been there when she returned to her chambers in the afternoon, after her lesson with Loki. Though it had been many years, Numina recognized the blade. It served as a seal. It was a spike assassins used in interrogations. You drive it through joints and twist.
"We saw you. We will see you. Facing the Ocean. Above the stone daggers." Is what the note had said, blood red letters on beige parchment.
She stood facing the ocean above the stone daggers. Against all better judgment Numina had followed the instructions left for her. Disobeying orders given by assassins resulted in things worse than death. The only comfort she took in the fact that they had left her the note. If they had wanted her dead, she would be dead.
The metal spike was held tightly in her hand as she waited, though Numina took care enough not to let it slice open her hand. The terror that held her rigidly kept her from knowing how long she had been standing at the edge, the wind tearing itself against her. But for the first time since she arrived, she knew that she was no longer alone.
"Do not turn around."
Numina said nothing, her body tensing more than she thought possible. Her heart leapt to her throat, lodging itself there and stopping. She could only manage a very tiny nod.
"Do you know who I am?"
She shook her head.
"Do you know who WE are?"
She nodded.
"Do you know what you are?"
She shook her head.
"You are not supposed to be. You are a wild card, a troublesome insect."
She said nothing, remaining still.
"You are a pretender playing with skills that do not belong to you. You are an unknown and unknowing."
Her breath was pulled from her.
"Do not use what you do not fully grasp. And do not get in our way."
Numina was suddenly and violently pushed forward. There was not time for her mind to wrap around what was happening, let alone attempt to save herself from the fierce ocean waves waiting for her as they threw themselves against the rocks.
~~.O.~~
Numina reached down, slender fingers grasping the metal that had been lost in the stubby vegetation growing on the rocks. It was a tool of the trade, of torture. She had dropped it when she had fallen from the cliff.
The day was not as bleak as when she had been instructed to meet a member of the assassins here. They sky was a light blue, cloudless and sunny. The ocean still raged against the rocks, but Numina kept herself well away from the edge.
"Do not use what you do not fully grasp." Echoed through her thoughts though it had been months ago since she had had been threatened. Fear was the only similar thing to that day as she watched the ocean swirl before her.
What if her actions on Vanaheim would be enough for them to come back? This time with an actual attempt on her life. Being thrown into the ocean had been a warning to add to the assassin's threats. If they had truly wanted her dead, Numina would have been before she hit the water.
There was no doubt in her mind that the assassins would hear of her aid in dealing with the Marauders. She had no way of knowing what they would do. They might go after her, or after someone she knew to punish her for disobedience. It is how they worked.
Though Numina hated her mother for all that she had done, she could not help but respect her. Falare had more honor than the other assassins within the order. She did not work for money, taking on contracts that only offered her the most reward as the others did. Falare had become Mercy, the assassin that worked for the Allfather, killing those that deserved it. The assassins that had trained her, that had raised her essentially, cared only for blood and money. Strictly in that order. Spill the blood for the money. They were ruthless, effective, and selfish. Caring only that their contract was filled without anyone getting in the way.
If they viewed that Numina was or had the potential to get in their way, they would not hesitate to kill her.
Numina looked at the metal spike in her hand, fear swirling within her. This is what her mother had dragged her into. This was the life she did not want. But as the days continued, Numina could no longer tell what it was she wanted. To be a healer? She hadn't used that kind of magic in months, focusing on her lessons with Loki. To do all she could to keep herself from being a monster? A few hours ago on Vanaheim, she had taken steps closer to being one when she fought the Marauders. What did she want? To throw herself over the edge and finish the job before the assassins did?
The cold metal felt crisp against her hand, the sharp edges scraping across her palm. Numina may not know everything about what she wanted, but she knew that she wanted the chance to figure it out. To live. Without hesitation, she tossed the assassin's gift over the edge. A small act of defiance that gave her a small amount of confidence.
"Are you going to throw yourself over the edge again?"
Numina wheeled around, but there was nothing behind her.
"You were lucky last time. You didn't hit the rocks."
She could not place where the voice was coming from, but it was the same as before.
"Impressive stunt you pulled on Vanaheim. You dealt with those men expertly."
"I had no choice." It was the first time she had spoken back.
"Of course you didn't." There was soft laughter, the most emotion the bodiless voice had shown so far. "So very much like your embarrassment of a mother."
Numina said nothing.
"I can see your fear. You disobeyed. You know that we punish."
She wanted to live. She pulled from her magic and it swirled in mass around her, just as invisible as the owner of the voice. Numina was searching for a source of either magic or a tear in the barrier.
"Do not get in our way, and we won't have a problem with you breathing."
Just as she had found a small deviation the physical world, it was gone.
All the assassins care about are blood and money, but only if they are went together. So long as you stayed out of their way when they were filling out a contract, you did not have a problem with them. The fact that after her little dual with Fandral, they had sought her out to threaten her and strike fear into her meant that they saw her as a potential threat to future contracts. They were fearful that she might intervene and prevent them from succeeding.
It meant that the assassins planned on coming to Asgard.
~~.O.~~
Boisterous laughter echoed into the hallway, and Numina was forced to push her thoughts and theories as to why the assassins were bothering with Asgard to the far corners of her mind. The order did not have peace treaties with worlds or make edicts that certain worlds were off limits, but surely they were not foolish enough to risk provoking the Allfather and starting a potential war with Asgard.
It was something that she could not solve tonight, not with so little information at present. With slight hesitation, Numina opened the door leading to the dining hall. Lively music was playing, men were singing drunkenly off key, laughter swam around the air, all while alcohol permeated every corner, smelling both sweet and sour. This was not one of the dining halls meant for noble affairs where the silverware was counted out and you had three of each utensil for specific parts of a meal. This hall was on the outskirts of the palace. It was meant for frivolous activities and drinking copious amounts that would be undignified in any other setting. It was a place to have mindless, drunken fun.
A small smile graced her lips as she saw her friends being the owners of the loudest table in the hall. Thor, Sif, Fandral, Volstagg, and Hogun were seated on the benches that surrounded the wooden table, scarred with scratches from previous drunken antics. Loki was there as well, though he was perched on stool at the furthest corner, overlooking the table and the rest of the room in the perfect vantage point. He looked agile and deadly simply sitting, a hint of sarcasm in the smirk he wore.
As she approached, Volstagg was the first to notice her, beaming smile larger than necessary due to the drink, "And there she is!" he bellowed, extending his arms in an obnoxious welcome. "Lady Numina the…the…" Volstagg paused for a moment.
"The dangerous?" Sif supplied.
"The beautiful?" Fandral attempted. When Sif glared at him he added, "What?" incredulously.
"The dauntless?" Thor tried.
"The fierce?" Hogun offered quietly.
"No…" Volstagg sighed. "Those don't sound right."
"The compassionate," Loki finally decided for him.
"Yes!" the large warrior agreed gleefully. "Lady Numina the Compassionate! It's perfect."
"One could even go so far as to say she is the beautiful Goddess of Compassion," Fandral added with a smirk. He received another glare from Sif. "If you keep doing that, your face might become permanently stuck in such an unattractive scowl." Sif rolled her eyes at him.
The smile on Numina's face grew. "What's all this about?"
"Oh, just admiring your finer qualities, my dear," Fandral purred, leaning in on his hand. He stared at her with a tawdry doe-eyed expression.
"I'm going to throw up," Sif groaned loudly.
"Our very loud friend here was insisting that we come up with a title for you," Thor finally said, answering Numina's question.
"Yes," Volstagg beamed. "There's Hogun the Grim, Fandral the Dashing, Volstagg the Valliant," with the mention of himself in the third person, he raised his hands as if to say yours truly, "Sif the Goddess of War, Loki the God of Mischief, and Thor the God of Thunder."
"Valliant?" Loki scoffed playfully. "I would have said 'Voluminous.'"
"Hey now!" Volstagg said, "There's no need to be rude."
"Loki does have a point, though," Fandral piped up, teasing his friend.
Volstagg laughed. "That may be true, but that doesn't allow him to be mean."
"But I thought I was the compassionate one," Numina said, mischief gleaming in her polar ice eyes as she pulled up a chair in the corner of the table adjacent to Loki.
"Yes, but-"
"And he is the God of Mischief, meaning that he will be mischievous," Sif piped in.
"True but-"
"And you are very large," Loki added with a smirk.
It was Thor's thunderous laughter that finally stopped the joking at Volstagg's expense. "Enough!" he laughed. "Enough." His own smile showed that he had been enjoying the banter amongst friends, however. "We are here to celebrate our victory! We can tear each other apart with jests once we've gotten well and plenty drunk."
As if on cue, a bar maiden came over with a new set of drinks for the victorious warriors. She placed a the new round in front of each seated at the table, handing Loki and Numina their own since they were seated on corners. Before any could take a draught of the sweet alcohol, Thor raised his glass, commanding voice gathering the attention of the others easily.
"To battles well fought and fine friends!" He boomed.
Numina raised her own cup, "May they never change us if not for the better," she added, much quieter than the God of Thunder.
"Here, here!" Volstagg roared in agreement, the other's echoing him with slightly less volume, but no less enthusiasm.
Though Numina did not enjoy drinking alcohol, for the small toast, she thought it would be less meaningful if she turned the liquor into water. She allowed the sweet and bitter taste burn her throat and tongue in a large gulp that was customary for a momentous tribute to a victory well won.
Volstagg let out an obnoxious burp as he slammed his glass onto the table. It shattered on impact. "Another!" he called out playfully, summoning a different maiden with a tray full of drinks.
And so begun the night of enjoyment. There were plenty of drinks and plenty of good conversation. Numina found it interesting how her friends acted when drunk, even Loki had a slight pink in his cheeks from the alcohol. Though she remained miraculously sober, it did not stop her from enjoying the night. They talked about random topics, multiple conversations usually going on at once. Volstagg was the quickest to become wholly drunk, followed swiftly by Thor. Sif cheeks looked rosier than usual, but the only change in her was that she smiled and laughed nonstop it seemed. Hogun was more chatty when drunk. And Fandral simply talked faster.
At one point, Numina could not stand his continued advances and quickly turned his drink to bitter vinegar as he raised it to his mouth.
"Loki!" he growled, spitting out the terrible liquid that had replaced his drink.
"It was not me," Loki said calmly, voice and expression betraying nothing.
"And who else has the ability to change my drink into…whatever that was?"
With a mischievous smirk dancing on her lips, Numina reached for her cup, turning it into a crystal wine glass with the berry color liquid flowing inside. Fandral's jaw dropped as he watched her take a sip.
"It was vinegar," she said sweetly. "And I hope it doesn't dishearten your attempts to seduce me," Numina continued, playful tone stringing her words together like beautiful white lace. "I am almost about to swoon, I promise." Her voice sounded like pure innocence, yet her eyes and the smirk she wore showed the amusement she had at playing a joke at Fandral's expense.
Loki chuckled deeply, smile gracing his lips as she shook his head, bringing his cup up for another swill of the mirth filled alcohol, the slight anger that had been building up over Fandral fawning over Numina dissipating with her roguish humor belittling the lascivious warrior.
Volstagg clasped Fandral on the back, shaking him side to side, either to draw emphasis or because of how drunk he was. "It's like I told you when we first met her:" he said, a few of his words slurring together, "I believe that means she is not interested, my friend."
Fandral shrugged him off, grumbling quietly. "Why do I never get the pretty girl?"
"Because you're too much of a pretty girl yourself," Sif answered, setting off the whole table in roaring laughter once more.
It was at this time that Numina decided it was time for her to leave the frivolities, though she much enjoyed the carefreeness she was able to feel amongst them now. She thanked them for allowing her to join in on their drunken merriment, to which Thor replied, "It was your victory as well, Lady Numina," or at least, that is what she thought she heard him say. It was a little tricky for her to make out the words.
The voices were starting to fade as she walked through the hallway. After a short time, she began to hear an echo of her footsteps. "You would make a terrible assassin," she jokingly said, turning to see Loki behind her.
He chuckled lightly, amusement pooling in his forest green eyes. "A good thing I wasn't trying to sneak up on you, but merely catch up to you then." Loki strode forward, his gate and smooth grace making it incredibly sexy. "Care for an escort, my lady?" he asked, holding out his arm to her once he stood inches away.
"Is your intent to see me safely home," she mused teasingly, "or keep your balance?"
"A little bit of both," he laughed.
Numina hummed her amusement. "I don't think I've seen you smile as much as you have tonight."
"It's the alcohol, I assure you," Loki quickly jumped to the proper excuse. "Nothing more."
"Then you should get drunk more often," she laughed.
"I am not drunk, darling," he said, moving his arm from her side in escort and placing it around her shoulders drawing her closer. "There would be a shocking difference if I were."
"Oh? I think I might want an example."
"If I were drunk," he said in a primal growl, "nothing would have been able to keep from taking you on that table in front of everyone."
To say that Loki's words shook her would be an understatement. Numina was at a loss when it came to a response, the roses in her cheeks blooming to their full red color. "Oh!" was all she finally managed in a soft and innocent squeak.
"Indeed. It would have been against all better judgment," he continued, "and it would have been something to regret later."
Perhaps it was the drink that didn't allow Loki to realized the full extent of what he had said, and although she wanted to say the drink was affecting the words he chose to convey what he meant, Numina also knew that some of the most honest things a person will say are when they are angry or drunk.
"You would regret being with me?" she asked, the humor and lightheartedness vanishing in an instant.
It was then that Loki comprehended what he had said to her. "No!" he quickly corrected. "That is not my meaning at all." Numina pulled away slightly, giving space between their bodies though his arm remained on her shoulder. "That is not something for their eyes. I simply meant that I would not wish for them to see that we are..."
But he was burying himself a deeper grave. "Because you are afraid of what they might think if they knew about this?" she asked, her tone not of anger but quiet, fearful understanding. "Because you are ashamed to be with me?"
"No, Numina-"
She had not noticed it before, but now as she thought on why they had been so cautious, why they were always stolen kisses and quiet words when alone, she could feel it. His magic was smothering them in a gentle, pulsing blanket. He was casting an illusion around them. It only served to aid her growing fears about…whatever it was they had between them.
"You're casting an illusion around us right now," she interrupted him.
"Yes, but only because-"
"Because I'm right." It was not a question.
Numina had stopped in her tracks, shrugging his arm off her shoulder. Loki was forced to turn around and face her. "You…are right." Loki finally said before quickly adding, "but only about the illusion and that… I am afraid." Her eyes narrowed a small fraction as she wore a softly pained face. "I am afraid of what this is, and more than that, I am afraid of losing it." Loki reached for her hands, drawing Numina closer to him. "That is why I am careful. That is why I keep us hidden. It is not out of shame for you. I would like nothing more than for all of Asgard to know that you are mine." He paused for a moment. "I do not know what would happen if it became public knowledge that we were…together, even in such a small way. I worry that it would slander you, and that the ridicule would be relentless upon you."
"Loki…" Numina breathed his name, voice as intoxicating as the smell of sweet flowers on a warm and gentle breeze.
"I would want nothing more than to wear you on my arm always," he sighed, eyes no longer able to meet the melted ice that pooled in Numina's irises, "but I do not know if we- if I am ready for that. Please, allow this to remain a secret between us until I understand what this is."
"Alright," she said, a small nod drawing his emerald gems back to her.
"Alright?" he repeated.
Numina nodded again, "I don't know what this is either, but I know that I enjoy it. I enjoy spending time with you." She said it with a gentle smile and thoughtful words that spoke volumes in Loki's heart, relief that he had not unintentionally lost her by his own careless words. "Escort me the rest of the way?" she asked innocently, reaching for his arm. "There are all kinds of dangers in the palace halls, or I may get lost."
Loki smiled at the playful turn of her words and the curve in her lips. He nodded, allowing Numina to take her place at his side. And although he wanted nothing for them to continue on in blissful silence, he could not help but sense a lingering uneasiness from the beautiful woman by his side.
"You are afraid as well," he said. The way she cast her arctic eyes downwards was a sign of her agreeing with him. "Why?" Loki continued, frowning in concern, in worry that he had done something previously to make her feel so.
"You may forget from time to time," Numina started, growing tense against him ever so slightly, "but are a prince. I am but a lady-in-waiting and an apprentice that was forced upon you," echoing words he had hissed from long before. "And before that I was nothing."
"Numina…" Loki tried, though he was unable to think of something to say.
"I am also a mess," she chuckled cynically, "with a past that seems to haunt me every day. I am a patchwork piece of cloth with strips and scars that don't match up very well." Numina shook her head lightly. "I am more work than should be required."
Loki looked at the woman he had smoothed against his side. She was trying so hard to keep her gaze fixed ahead, unwavering despite her fear and self-loathing. "I only see radiance," he said, causing her eyes to meet his own. "And something worth protecting."
"Protecting from what?"
"From the past that haunts her," Loki said, drawing her in closer against him, eyes remaining on her icy orbs. "From the self-doubt that plagues her." He hesitated a moment before adding, "From myself if need be."
Numina finally found herself unable to hold his gaze. Though his words were heartfelt, they did not quell all her fears. Loki's brow's furrowed and an innocent, yet pain expression marked his features as he gazed upon her. "There is something else," he said.
"You have…" she stopped for a moment, afraid of how he might react to her words, "a lewd reputation when it comes to woman, Prince Loki." It was a faint whisper ghosting her lips.
"I do," he sighed in agreement.
"Am I to be another pawn in your games?" she asked. "One that you sacrifice for ulterior motives when you no longer find use for me?"
"No!" Loki all but blurted out, appalled at the notion of using her like that. "I would never use you, Numina."
Fearfully, she responded, "I very much wish I could believe that."
It hurt. Loki would not deny the pain he felt that she would say that of all people. Numina was one of very few that knew him well enough to know when he was lying or attempting to trick them with some form of illusion. Yet she could not discern at that moment if he was lying or telling the truth. It hurt, but it was what being the God of Mischief and Lies had wrought upon his reputation.
Loki stopped and turned Numina to face him. "Then believe this," he pleaded, placing his hands on either side of her arms. "Every time I see Fandral draw near to you, or wrap his arms around you, I desire nothing less but to rip him off of you and replace him. Rage burns within me when I see his relentless pursuit of your affection with lustful comments and looks." His emerald eyes were searching her face from some response. "It is not merely out of jealousy that I do this though. I…hate the way he makes you uncomfortable and nervous, how his presence makes you shrink away physically and socially, how your bright and marvelous spirit recedes within you at his touch and words."
There was surprise, but also relief at what Loki said. Jealousy may not be the best of emotions felt, but that his jealousy was only a fraction of what he felt when he thought to protect her brought her more relief than he could know. Numina smiled at him, warm and soothing, before she took a small step forward and buried her head into his chest.
Loki's arms wrapped around her, pulling her closer into the embrace, bringing her warmth to his center. As Numina nuzzled her head into the space between his shoulder and chest, he rested his chin lightly atop her moonlight blond hair, breathing in her sweet, intoxicating scent.
"I believe you," she said.
Numina felt the inaudible sigh of relief Loki gave at her words, and after a time of simply enjoying the feel of one another, he finally pulled away slightly, hands trailing faintly across her arms. "At this rate we will never get you back to your rooms," Loki said, a playful smirk curving his lips.
"How horrible," Numina hummed in amusement before allowing him to take her by the arm once more and resume escorting her back.
As they reached her chamber doors, Numina turned to face him, her back placed against the threshold. "You would like nothing more than for all of Asgard to know I am yours?" she asked, echoing previous words from his confession; her voice dripping with sweet music.
"It was… a figure of speech," Loki quickly scrambled. Numina was the only one that could reduce him to such a state where he was grasping for an answer, straining to string a sentence together. "One that sounded better in my-"
A slender finger placed itself tenderly upon Loki's lips, silencing the silver tongue that was failing to spin straw in to gold. "I am yours," Numina repeated, the music of her voice still light and playful, though with the reassuring sound of conviction.
Loki could not help but grin at what she said and the depth of it. Without words, he reached for the hand that lingered by his lips, planting a tender kiss upon her hand. It was more intimate in that moment than any kiss they shared could have been. It was his goodbye and goodnight, filled with an endless amount of passion. It was also seductive and provocative enough to send shivers down Numina's spine.
~~.O.~~
Most of Numina's lessons with Loki began with testing what was learned from the previous day. Loki would summon the same enemies and Numina would wield the magic as she had managed to satisfactorily accomplish understanding from the previous day. From their Loki would either continue on to something of a similar nature or continue with instruction if Numina did not quite have the complete understanding of the skill. Today, however, Loki had something different planned. He was fearful of what she was hiding from the others and himself, of what she was hiding from herself.
Numina hadn't said a word about what had happened on Vanaheim, and though she had not suffered any physical injuries, Loki was worried that the wounds were hidden within her mind, her soul even. If she swallowed the darkness of self-doubt, self-loathing she may feel at her actions it could chip away at her until she was no longer able to stand-
"Good morning, your highness," Numina's musical voice sang from the doorway, drawing Loki's eyes to her from the doorway. He could not help but let out a small huff in amusement. Every day, the first time she saw him, Numina would always use the proper title for him in a formal greeting. And although he found her sound of her voice more pleasing the greatest of instruments, he unconsciously rubbed his temples, the words reverberating painfully within his skull. Though he had not consumed nearly as much alcohol as the others, he had enough, evidently, to cause a great deal of discomfort similar to a hangover.
Numina realized that there was something wrong when she entered the training area to find that the lighting was unnaturally dim. It became even more apparent when Loki did not chastise her right away after calling him by something other than his name. Numina could not help but smirk when she saw him massaging his forehead, making it apparent what the issue was.
"Here," she whispered, voice soothing. Numina brushed Loki's hand away, placing hers on either side of his temples. Blue light began to glow in her palms as she quickly began to heal the discomfort last night's antics had brought about for him. It was a simple matter of smoothing out the dopamine levels on a neurological aspect.
Loki had forgotten how wonderful the touch of her gentle healing magic was, the last time he used it months ago on the night she told him of her greatest fear. It was as if he were being caressed by soothing warm waters of a bath or hot spring. The dull ache and throbbing he felt radiating from his head was eased away by the blue glow of Numina's magic.
"There," Numina said, her voice no longer needing to remain at a whisper.
Presently, Loki began to raise the intensity of the lighting. "Thank you, my lady."
"It was my pleasure," she hummed, smile gracing her lips. "Though one would assume that the Master of Magic would know how to cure the ill effects of a night gone drunk."
"Healing is not a strong skill of mine," Loki admitted to her. "I can seal a wound, but that is the full extent of what I know. And," he added, placing emphasis on the word, "I wasn't drunk."
"No, your highness, of course you were not. Drunkenness is not a princely quality after all," she teased him, laughter dancing in her musical tone. "Perhaps I can teach you a few things on healing at a later date."
"My thoughts exactly," he said with a smile. "Walk with me?"
"What of the lesson for today?" she asked, not really caring either way so long as she got to spend a good portion of the day with him as always.
"It can wait," he shrugged. "I thought you might enjoy a walk in the gardens. This is one of the last few days before the winter chill starts to creep in." Loki pulled open the door she had just come through, holding it for her to walk through. "And you could use a bit of a break," he added.
Numina turned to him as they began to make their way to the gardens. "I remember I once asked you for a break," she commented, an amused gleam flickering in her eyes. "Saying that you turned your nose at the idea would be an understatement."
"If you can ask for a break, then you clearly don't need one," he replied with a smirk.
"That's the nice version of what you told me, yes," she teased.
"I apologize."
Her arctic blue eyes focused on him, before she began her own mischief, "Please stop apologizing for everything."
Loki could not stop himself from laughing at how beautifully she was able to replicate his words and inflection. "I did say that, didn't I?" Numina nodded, but she was grinning at the humor of it all. "Well, I deeply regret the harsh words I have said to you."
"That almost sounded like an apology," she smirked.
"It was not. Just a statement of a fact."
Numina left it at that allowing their conversation to fade, a simple hum of enjoyment coming from her as they continued to walk towards the gardens. Loki walked beside her, his hands clasped behind his back as he went, the leather coat he wore rustling softly with his long and graceful strides. He looked regal, walking with the grace of royalty. Numina could not stop herself from comparing him to her. Next to him, she looked very dull, common even. She had not even realized that she had been staring until Loki spoke.
"Is there something wrong?"
"Oh, no," she stumbled quickly, a blush tinting the color of her cheeks. "I was simply admiring…the way you walk." Now that she said the words, it sounded silly. She shook her head lightly, chastising herself for her foolishness.
"And what is about the way I walk that has you so…transfixed?"
"You're making fun of me," Numina said, embarrassment enhancing the red on her cheeks.
"I would never dream of making fun of you, my dear," Loki said, jokingly sounding as if he were appalled by the accusation. "I was serious with my question."
"You walk…with meticulous elegance like you have control over everything that happens. You walk like royalty, and you look like royalty." She stammered, nervousness making her words fluttery. "You look proud and confident. And you radiate with…something that says you deserve respect," she ducked her head, hoping that the movement would toss her pale blond hair across her face to hide the growing blush. "It's…intoxicating"
Loki's smile was not one of insult or amusement at the words she thought were silly, but honest. "I am a prince."
"So is Thor," Numina pointed out, "but he doesn't walk with the same…regality as you do."
He chuckled faintly. "I never thought I would have the way I walked analyzed." Loki's emerald eyes drew her in, "But I get that there's a little more to it than that."
"The confidence and self-assuredness that you have and display," Numina said softly. "I'm more than a little jealous of it."
Loki's eyebrows were tugged into a small frown. "I mean no offense with what I say, but you are shy and timid in what you do, Numina. It's reflected in your posture and the way you act," he said. "Having confidence in yourself is obvious because confidence gives you power, which in turn can affect every aspect of yourself. And I think it is power that you fear above all else, and that is what you see, what others see when they look at you."
Numina nodded. "I fear what power brings," she admitted.
"You did not seem fearful when you were healing Thor," Loki acknowledged, "and that took immense power on your behalf."
"That's different," she argued. "I was using that power to save a life…not take it."
"But did you not save lives on Vanaheim?"
"I… yes, but that was…" Numina hesitated. She had pushed the thoughts of her actions on Vanaheim far away, hiding what she felt quite well from herself and others. "I only saw death and carnage. It may have saved lives, but the blood on me was caused by my hand."
"And the lives spared from their own blood spilling were also caused by you hand." Loki argued with soft and gentle words.
Her eyes drifted in the opposite direction Loki walked on. Numina had to admit that he was right, but no matter how many lives she saved, using any of the skills she had been taught by her mother seemed wrong. It was a grotesque art, in her mind, and no matter how many times you tried to paint over it or interpret it, you could not change the ugly truth that it reflected.
"I had never taken someone's life before yesterday, Loki…" It was a pained whisper, childish innocence seemingly wrapped in her voice. "I can't help but think that it was the first step in becoming Falare."
Loki stopped her, a tender hand tugging at her arm. Numina's icy eyes seemed to be melting with conflict as they met his. "I had no idea…" he whispered. Someone so well versed in combat as she, Loki had not come to even wonder if Numina had ever used her skills on someone. It was assumed. "I thought… It doesn't matter what I thought," Loki continued, shaking his head slightly, "what you did…" He stopped. That didn't sound like the right thing to say.
Numina did not look away from him, not when his eyes glanced to the side as he searched for something to say, emerald gems shining with a desire to help. When they met hers once more, their intensity on her showed how honest his net words would be. "Never let your actions define who you are. Only you can choose who you are and what you will become."
There was fleeting turn of her lips, a faint smile that disappeared as quickly as it appeared. "That is beautiful sentiment, your highness," she said frail words tainted with disbelieving despair. "But I find it hard to believe since they are words coming from a prince who knows exactly who he is."
"Yes," Loki said darkly, "I am the son of Odin, the brother of Thor. I am the trickster up to no good, a manipulator. I am the Dark Prince, the shadow compared to the Golden Heir. I am untrustworthy and cruel; and above all else, I am heartless."
"I didn't mean-" Numina started in apology, flinching at the coldness of his words.
"No you didn't," Loki agreed. "But I know my reputation. You said that I know exactly who I am. You couldn't be further from the truth." He paused, thinking over his next words as he resumed walking towards the garden. "I don't know who I am. It is like I am dancing on a fence between light and dark, constantly swaying from one side to the other. I am not certain on which side I will fall."
"Then why not choose?" Numina asked meekly, continuing to walk beside him.
Loki laughed cynically. "Can I though? You find it hard to believe that it is possible, after all. Perhaps choosing who we are is but the grandest of masks we wear and allow others to see, and deep down, we are always the monsters or heroes we were born to be."
Numina swallowed hard. Her small quip in argument to his kind words was turning against her, and she regretting pressing the issue rather than letting the matter drop. "I choose light," she said suddenly, having left Loki's rhetorical question unanswered. He gave her a puzzled look. "I choose to step off of the fence and into the light," Numina said, confidence growing in her as the words rolled off her tongue. Her posture straightened, and for a moment she carried herself with regality of a princess, a queen.
The smile that grew on his lips was a surprise. A moment ago he had been all but blaming the world for his woes, and now he wore a tender smile. Numina lips pursed to form a question, but Loki interrupted her before she could.
"I am glad to hear it," Loki said, the conflicted expression evaporating into something warmer that radiated from his smile.
"I don't…" she was about to add understand at the end, but it was easy for her to figure out. "You played me," Numina said, a small smirk tugging at the corners. "And I fell for it."
Loki's eyebrows pulled together in a fashion that was equal parts apologetic and saying you totally did. "I was not lying to you Numina. I understand the wars that rage within you. Though I may have added a bit of theatricality in my words for you benefit."
"My benefit?"
Numina felt his warm magic envelope them in an illusion as he closed the distance they had kept as while walking. Loki pulled her close to him, fingers trailing to her cheek, caressing it with a feather light touch. "You are far too afraid yourself, my dear. Every now and then, you'll show this glimmer of the confidence you have hidden; and it's absolutely beautiful." Numina leaned into hand, savoring the shivers his cold touch brought. "I wish I could see it more often. I wish I could show you how stunning the difference is, how stunning you are."
"Then be my light," she whispered, her words tugging at Loki's heart. The eyes she had closed as she leaned into his touch opened slowly, icy orbs penetrating his own. "And I'll be yours."
"Alright."
"Alright," she breathed, a ghost of a smile brightening her expression.
"At this rate we will never make it to the gardens." Loki's mischievous grin was intoxicating.
"A common occurrence with us, it seems," Numina replied, allowing the God of Mischief's silver words to draw them into lighter conversation.
"I do not necessarily mind, however," he continued, dissipating his magic as he regretfully released the tender hold he had on her. "It allows us more time together." Loki held out an arm to Numina, which she gladly accepted as they resumed walking. Hopefully they would in fact make it to the gardens on this attempt to continue onwards-
A scream rang out, earsplitting, a high pitch that grated on the ears as loudly as metal being dragged across a chalkboard. Numina and Loki froze, the terror slicing through the air on the shriek of a woman all around them. All light and humor they had just regained vanished as they quickly abandoned their post on each other's arms and ran towards the source of the scream.
The maid was young and curled up in one of the corners of a doorway in the hall. Blood stained the flawless marble floors, pooling around the guard that lay dead. Loki and Numina were not the first ones there. The girl's scream had summoned other guards. Looks of shock and panic were on their faces as the kneeled beside their comrade, trying to stir him for the wintery cold that gripped his body in vain.
He was dead. It was obvious to Numina simply by the amount of blood that covered the floor. Had she been there a few minutes earlier, she might have saved this man. But she would have only had a few seconds to do so. The wound that had killed him was grievous.
The healer has the bloodiest hands. You cannot treat a wound without knowing how deep it goes… The weapon that had been used to kill the guard had started from that soft spot on the side of the neck between it and the shoulder. It required only one hand on the hilt to begin, and it usually started with the enemy coming from beside you, as if he were walking with you as a friend. From there, a second hand was required on the hilt as the weapon was dragged from the side of the neck to the front, slicing through tendons, arteries, and other major blood vessels until it hit the clavicle located on the collar bone. Often times, the attacker would swing themselves to the front of their victim, using their weight to drag the blade over and downward. It would only take a few seconds for the guard to bleed out.
It was an assassin's technique.
The realization had Numina frozen in place, as she watched the guards running about frantically, unsure of what to do. Though they reflected the color of ice, her eyes did not stay frozen in place. They surveyed the area, noting that there was no blood trail from the attacker- assassins are not sloppy- there was no hesitation marks in the gaping wound- an assassin did not doubt- there was a drop of blood by a nearby door in the hall- assassins should not make leave any kind of footprint. It was a single drop of blood. There was no tail on it, meaning that whatever it had fallen from had not moved. The assassin had stood in the doorway, blade still wet with blood, and watched his victim bleed to death from a wound that nearly severed his neck from his shoulders.
Numina was brought back from her thoughts as someone was tugging on her arm, pulling her away. "There's nothing we can do," Loki said grimly, attempting to steer her away from the carnage. When he noticed that she was all but locked in place concern crept forth. "Numina?"
"His wound…" Numina said, "Do you see it?"
Loki straightened up beside her. "Yes," he answered, all emotion drained away like the blood had from the guard.
"It's a technique my mother taught me," she said.
"That would mean that…" Loki trailed off. The end of that sentence, that knowledge, being something far worse than a random murder.
Numina nodded slowly. "What's behind that door?' she asked, motioning towards the one with the blood drop in front of it. "The one he was guarding?"
"It's a vault for old and obsolete weapons."
Why would the assassins be interested in an old weapons? Numina wondered before turning to Loki. "I don't think we were meant to go to the gardens today," she said, small notes of sorrow in her tone.
"It would appear that way, yes," he agreed quietly.
"Then I shall take my leave, your highness," Numina said with a small bow, returning to formality since there were many onlookers now as the guards struggled to grasp what had happened and how to proceed. "But Loki…" she added. "Promise me that you won't look into this. Please."
Loki looked at her curiously. She sounded as if she were begging him not to. "Why?"
"Please promise me, Loki. The assassins…" her voice became dire, "they kill anyone that interferes or gets to close. You must promise me that you won't look into this."
"I promise," he said sincerely.
"Thank you," Numina breathed, a small smile gracing her lips. "Farewell, my prince." And with a final nod, she departed for her chambers, unsure of what to do next.
All Numina knew was that her guess had been right. The assassins were planning something involving Asgard. They had killed that guard most likely because he got in the way of whatever their goal was. The weapons vault? There had to be something else going on. Assassins cared not for weapons other than the daggers and other tools of the trade.
When she finally opened the doors to her chambers, all thoughts set to the task of figuring out the puzzle were completely wiped from her mind as her heart nearly stopped. On the table just like the last time, there was a metal spike, a tool of the trade that held a piece of parchment to the wood. Tentatively, Numina approached, slow movements caused out of fear and caution. Her hand wrapped around the metal spike and pulled it from the table. The parchment was once more written in red letters.
"You saw him. He got in the way. A lesson to be learned." That was all the note said, though Numina did not doubt that it had been written in the guard's blood.
~~.O.~~
Author's Note:
Well, this one is a bit shorter than the other ones I write. I honestly had a bit of difficulty because only one day has passed from the last chapter. Hopefully the next one will be a bit better.
Anyways, please let me know what you guys think! I love getting feedback. It lets me know how I am doing and also supplies me with several awesome ideas I had considered, but did not think were good.
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter.