It was over,

It was, for the first time in Vegeta's life, things seemed to be truly and completely over.

Since he could remember there was always the promise of a fight looming in his immediate future.

As a small child it had been the fight to earn his father's respect. The original King Vegeta had no use for weaklings, especially when they were members of his family. Vegeta knew, even then that he would be useless to his father if he was not strong.

Even though that strength had not made much of a difference when Frieza came along.

Then it was a fight to survive under Frieza's rule, the fight to purge planets, and the fight to hopefully, eventually become stronger than Frieza, strong enough to kill him, strong enough to take revenge on him for taking away his planet, and his birthright.

Then there was the fight on Earth, which he supposed had been the real turning point in his fairly monotonous life. Earth was supposed to be easy, kill the natives, get the dragon balls, and become immortal. It has seemed so simple. Obviously the plans had changed, significantly.

Namek had been nothing but fights, Dodoria, Zarbon, the Ginyu Force, and finally at long last a fight with Frieza.

The fighting had only stopped when he was dead.

The news he received upon his resurrection had only strengthened his resolve and his greatest fight had begun, the fight to surpass Kakarot, to become a Super Saiyan, the fight to kill Kakarot and kill him for daring to achieve all of Vegeta's goals.

And Vegeta had achieved those goals, he had become a Super Saiyan, he had surpassed all of his limitations and become the legendary warrior he was always meant to be.

Even though that strength had not made any difference to the Androids or to Cell.

Kakarot was gone. And his brat had surpassed the both of them. And Vegeta did not feel like fighting anymore, he just felt lost.

For the first time in, well in forever there was foreseeable peace in Vegeta's future if he chose to say on earth.

Why even STAY on earth? He wondered to himself. What is there for me here now? True he had a lover, and his son was here, but such trysts had never kept him on a planet before. He had to admit, though the woman was not the first lover he had taken on an alien planet, she was the most interesting and by far the smartest. And he had never had the future of a child to think about before.

Vegeta shook his head violently, such weak thoughts where unbecoming of him, the Prince of Saiyans, his people did not mate for life and they certainly did not take their mates or offspring into account when contemplating life decision. When had he become so soft as to even entertain those ideas? Clearly the Earthlings were infecting him with their familial sentiments. He should endeavor to leave Earth as soon as possible.

But, when had leaving earth become such a painful thought?

No. The real reason he had stayed was to defect Kakarot, to regain his honour. He had only stuck around the earth so long was to face the challenges it frequently presented to a warrior of his caliber. That was all there was to it, wasn't it?

Despite the empty feeling the thought of combat roused in him Vegeta decided he needed the distraction. He had never been particularly good at addressing his feelings; instead he had pushed into the background, using them as fuel to grow stronger, to push himself farther in his training. He had no idea how to deal with what was happening now, other than to distract himself. Kakarot's brat despite the power he had shown in the fight against Cell would not be a good fight; he was too unstable, too unpredictable.

No, he knew who to seek out for a consistently challenging fight. Though their power levels were not remotely on par Vegeta supposed that he was the best option he had left.

Piccolo sensed Vegeta approaching the lookout long before his arrival. He was not particularly shocked by the impending visit, though he was surprised at the raw aggression and the confusion that was evident in Vegeta's ki. He wondered offhandedly if Vegeta knew that he was projecting his feelings so plainly, though few people could determine emotion through ki, Piccolo was unsure if Vegeta was aware that it was possible to do.

Uncrossing himself from the lotus position Piccolo crossed the rim of the lookout to the direction Vegeta was approaching from and waited. He was not entirely sure what to expect upon arrival Vegeta had been….unstable, to say the least in the week since the fight with Cell and Son's decision to stay in the afterlife. Piccolo had been busy dealing with Gohan's reaction to the news and trying to adjust Dende to the earth and to his new duties to pay much attention to Vegeta's existential crisis. Besides any overt concern from his end would have been rejected, he knew what Vegeta was going through, but any advice from him would have only served to make him angrier. Unsolicited advice to Vegeta rarely went well.

Vegeta landed on the lookout in a blaze of ki barley slowing his decent enough to avoid cracking the white tiles. Piccolo felt his eye twitch, whatever there was left of Kami in his subconscious felt VERY strongly about keeping the Lookout free of damage.

"Namek, fight me" Vegeta demanded, fists clenched and eyes blazing.

"Nice to see you too, Vegeta" Piccolo replied rolling his eyes. Vegeta looked like hell, his already messy hair was wild from the flight and he looked like he hadn't slept in a week, and if Piccolo's nose was anything to go by he also had not properly bathed in just as long. "If you'd like to spar we can, though we are not doing it here"

"Why in the hell not Namek?" Vegeta had not get unclenched his fists, raw aggression was apparent in every gesture.

"Because it is three in the god damned morning, and the lookout is not a battle ground, people live here and two of them are asleep." Piccolo doubted Vegeta would listen to reason, but he was not willing to deal with Mr. Popo learning he or Vegeta had destroyed the Lookout's gardens with a stray ki blast. "If you want to fight we can do it in the desert."

"The desert is freezing this time of night there is no way you are dragging me out there" Vegeta stared at Piccolo like he was insane for even proposing the location change. Piccolo was shocked Vegeta had the forethought to argue against the desert based on the temperature. Being Namekian prevented Piccolo from feeling cold; he had forgotten how inconvenient other races could be.

"Fine then we can wait for dawn; if you want to spar with me so badly you can hold off for a few hours." Piccolo returned Vegeta's stare. They continued their silent battle of will for several seconds before Vegeta snapped his head away.

"Have it your way Namek, if you want to stall and get your ass handed to you at dawn that is your prerogative. I will wait." Vegeta sat down on the tile roughly.

Piccolo was shocked at the acquiesce from Vegeta of all people. Piccolo figured he must be truly conflicted if immediate reaction had not been to lash out physically for the disagreement. Piccolo shook his head; he remembered those feelings after Son's first death. The confusion, the emptiness, the anger. How the anger had differed from the anger he had used to motivate his entire life. The eventual realization that finally killing Son had done nothing to improve his life, had done nothing to ease his crushing loneliness. He lacked an appropriate outlet for these feelings he had taken them out on Gohan during their training. Eventually Gohan in his own kindness had helped him come to terms with the fact that he did not want to kill Son anymore, with the reality that having a friend was worth more than garnering the fear of millions of people. Gohan had continued to change him for the better as well as help him accept the idea that he had in some way fundamentally changed.

Piccolo had no idea how to help Vegeta. Even though they were so alike, even though Piccolo knew what he was feeling, there was no way to reach out to him emotionally. Having him an arm's reach away drove this point home the idiot monkey was completely guarded mentally and physically. Piccolo sighed as he sat down in his usual louts position. Piccolo wondered to himself why he even felt the need to reach out to him? Perhaps this need to play therapist/ father figure was some undesired side effect of his fusion with Kami, he would have to look into that. Perhaps with Son gone he was subconsciously trying to find another friend? In any case he could wait, strategy was his strong suit. Vegeta would crack before he did. Whether he cracked and asked for advice or cracked and blew up the Lookout remained to be seen. Though Piccolo had a feeling that Vegeta even coming to the Lookout had been a big step.

Vegeta was fuming. It had been an hour and the idiot Namekian had not moved or acknowledged his presence once since their initial conversation on his arrival. He had come for a spar, the only thing Piccolo was remotely decent for, and had been completely rebuffed. Vegeta had come here to punch things until his head was clear, to loose himself in battle, not sit in silence and continue to dwell. Being ignored was not something Vegeta could handle on a good day, let alone right now.

'I should destroy this stupid floating palace' he thought. Though he knew it would not bring him any satisfaction. This knowledge threw him even further into confusion. When had destruction failed to cheer him up? Even the thought of it usually brought him joy. How had that idiot's death confused everything so significantly? How did Kakarot have such a hold on him?

Vegeta once again focused on staring at Piccolo. He knew the Namek could feel his stare, yet he continued to sit with his eyes closed and his head bowed. Years ago, he recalled Piccolo telling him about how he used to desire Kakarot's death, how he had also fought to defeat him and to surpass him. At the time he had thought the Namek was playing some grand joke on him, pretending to understand him. Later he had consulted with the woman, asking her outright who the fuck the Demon King Piccolo had been. She looked shocked that he would ask but had dug up her scrapbooks from that time. He remembered seeing the newspapers and reports confirming what Piccolo had said. Including one particularly gruesome photo of a younger Kakarot punching through the chest of who he could only assume was the Namek's father.

'How did you do it?' Vegeta thought staring at Piccolo, 'how did you let go of a lifetime of anger and just accept that you would never kill Kakarot. never reclaim your honour' On some level Vegeta admitted if anyone could help him puzzle through his feelings it was the Namek, but he would rather die than ask for his help.

"It wasn't easy you know" Piccolo said suddenly opening one eye "getting over wanting to kill Son, giving up on being angry."

"WHAT THE HELL NAMEK!" Vegeta yelled jumping to his feet "ARE YOU READING MY MIND?"

"No." Piccolo said completely deadpan "your facial expressions and ki are doing a fantastic job of letting me know what you're thinking."

Vegeta's eyes bored into Piccolo's as he turned a fantastic shade of maroon. He could see Piccolo bracing for impact; the Namek was fairly certain he was going to regret trying to relate to Vegeta. He felt the familiar rage rushing up inside him, the rage that accompanied anyone questioning his pride, or his utter superiority. Vegeta felt comforted at its presence, rage he could understand, sympathy was a foreign concept. Surprisingly, he felt the rage rush out of him as suddenly as it had appeared his head spinning. What would punishing the Namek prove? What good was any of the anger, what use was his pride when the only man he had wanted to defeat was beyond his reach? Would killing the Namek mean killing one of the few people on this mud ball he respected, even minutely?

'When the hell did I start considering the Namek someone I respected, shit, since when do I respect anyone who isn't me? Vegeta sat down heavily once again on the tiles of the Lookout. He looked at the Namek and was amused to see a look of genuine shock on his face. Normally Piccolo's emotions were impossible to determine from his facial expression. Such blatant surprise was hilarious.

He watched the Namek's expression return to normal. "If you tell anyone about what you think I thought I will end you." Vegeta said offhandedly.

"Noted,"

"So how did you do it then," Vegeta continued, "how did you go on knowing that you would never be able to kill him knowing you would never reclaim the honour you lost, the honour he took from you, God, how do you continue to go on when everyone around you surpasses you in strength?"

Piccolo again was completely shocked; he was not entirely prepared to hear Vegeta speak so candidly. Though he supposed exhaustion and grief had a fair bit to do with this conversation. Appreciating the point that Vegeta must have been pushed to that he was willing to open up, even a little. He chose to ignore the rather pointed comment at the end regarding his own power level and ineffectiveness. Piccolo's instincts told him to respond sarcastically, to make light of the question. He knew this was a terrible idea, Vegeta had been forthright, and he owed him the same courtesy.

"You start by realizing that there is more to life then fighting to win and prove yourself. You continue by realizing that finding something to protect and fighting for that is much more valuable. And you realize being an evil asshole didn't make you very happy in the first place. As for honour, Son when I lost that fight with Son I had no real honour, I was a desperate, violent child back then. Interacting with Son and Gohan, fighting for the Earth and my home world, dying for my best friend, those are the things that gave me honour. Or as close to it as someone like me came to it anyway. "

"Sentimental crap," Vegeta said quietly, though it made him think back to the fight with Cell, when Trunks had been killed. How his power had meant nothing in the face of being unable to prevent or avenge his death. "You'll never hear me spouting such drivel," Vegeta continued thinking of his infant son and how one day the same thing may happen if he was not strong enough.

"Perhaps not" Piccolo looked out at the sunrise coming up over the edge of the lookout. "I thought the same thing once. I eventually figured out it was better to work with Son then against him. Being friends with him was much more rewarding than wanting to kill him. Take it from me, even when you kill him it backfires on you in the end."

"How so?"

"Well in my experience killing him only prevented him from killing you and Nappa before you could kill me." Piccolo smirked at Vegeta.

Vegeta shook his head; remembering Kakarot showing up seconds after Nappa had finished off Piccolo. Vegeta wondered how the Namek could joke about his death in such a way. He wondered how he could even speak to him. Perhaps as a fellow former earth conquering bad-guy Piccolo could appreciate giving people a second chance? Perhaps dying knowing you were eventually being brought back cheapened the whole experience? Likely he was mildly insane.

"I can't imagine being friends with that idiot being particularly rewarding" Vegeta raised an eyebrow at Piccolo daring him to disagree.

"It wasn't always, easy," Piccolo admitted "I imagine it made me a better person in the end, or something."

"Besides," Vegeta went on "all this high and mighty talk about finding something to fight for and protect, I saw what happened with Cell, you couldn't protect Gohan any more then I could protect Trunks. What good is letting go of your anger if it makes no difference in the end."

Vegeta watched Piccolo's expression darken. He had hit a nerve bringing up Gohan, it was a surefire way to make the Namek upset. Vegeta would never admit to him that he had, in some small way, admired how he had entered the fight with Cell, fully knowing he was going to die to protect Gohan. He wanted to hear his answer.

"I suppose in the end I couldn't do much directly to protect him, no," Piccolo's expression was pained as he admitted this, "though considering I was the one who trained him in the first place, I imagine I am allowed to take partial credit for that victory. Besides if I hadn't stopped wanting to kill Son long enough to train Gohan none of that would have been possible."

"Hmph" was Vegeta's only response.

"I imagine I won't be a particularly good teacher anymore though," Piccolo admitted sadly "I imagine you'd have more luck trying to help him control his transformations, to be honest. "

"Me?" Vegeta was slightly disbelieving the Namek would let him near Kakarot's brat, let alone seriously spar with him. Vegeta realized, even though the brat was stronger than the both of them, letting anyone fight with Gohan was a big deal to Piccolo. "If you think I am going to become some kind of glorified babysitter you are sorely mistaken!"

"I suppose not, besides eventually you'll have you own son to train, I was merely saying that you could train Gohan, eventually once he can control his power he will be an amazing sparring partner and you won't have to come annoy me whenever you need to work out your anger." Piccolo smirked.

Vegeta narrowed his eyes, he knew the Namek was pandering to his pride, but he did have a point. Training the brat now may prove a good investment in the future. "I may, eventually, entertain the idea."

They sat in silence together for a few moments. Vegeta glanced at Piccolo every few seconds trying to decipher what he was thinking. "What the hell do you do when all the fighting stops anyway? I have never had to think particularly far beyond my next battle, I always assumed I would be dead before any kind of a break in the fighting."

"I actually have no idea" Piccolo laughed, shaking his head, "I don't think there has ever been a time where there has been a promise of an extended period of peace like this. I'm with you on the assuming you'd never have to stop fighting. I'm sure some intergalactic freak show will come by and ruin things before very long."

Vegeta nodded in agreement. He wasn't used to the Namek and himself speaking so freely. Usually any limited conversation they had was concealed in sarcasm. Speaking so candidly was unsettling, but also slightly comforting. He respected the Namek, even if he would not ever admit it, he was sure Piccolo knew.

"Enough of this emotional crap, its dawn Namek, you owe me a fight." Vegeta stood up starching his legs after the extended period of sitting.

"Mhm, hold that though" Piccolo raised a hand pointing to the West, "Gohan will be here soon he may want to join."

Vegeta turned to the West beginning to sense the brat's ki coming toward them. "Fine, the two of you may put up a decent challenge for a Saiyan elite such as myself."

They both stood in silence as Gohan neared the Lookout and landed close to Piccolo.

"Good morning Mr. Piccolo!" Gohan ran toward his teacher smiling. Vegeta saw Piccolo give Gohan a small smile before his face resumed its normal, neutral state. "And good morning to you Mr. Vegeta," Gohan said bowing to him before turning his full attention back to Piccolo.

"What brings you here so early Gohan?" Piccolo turned his attention fully to the child as he spoke to him. Vegeta noticed how different the Namek's stature was with Gohan present, how at ease he seemed around him. He also noted the way Gohan looked at Piccolo with such obvious reverence. Vegeta wondered briefly if one day his own son would look at him like that.

"So about that spar Vegeta," Piccolo said turning back to Vegeta, "Gohan and I are ready when you are." Piccolo smiled threateningly, making sure to show every fang, and Gohan beamed at him genuinely excited at the chance at a friendly spar with Vegeta.

"Unlike you weaklings," Vegeta relied haughtily, "I am always ready for a fight"

As he flew home he smirked to himself. Vegeta would never admit it, but the Namek had helped him. The hollow feeling was still there but it had lessened. Though, he admitted to himself he would never fully let it go, the need to kill Kakarot, to settle their score. It seemed his vow to never fight again was a short lived one; he had been fooling himself when he had said that, fighting was in his blood, it was the last and perhaps the most important legacy of his race.

For now, for now he would help the Namek train Kakarot's brat, to teach him to control his anger. The spar that earlier proved to Vegeta that Gohan would in time become a worthy opponent. But he would continue to train himself as well.

As the Namek himself had once said, no one on Earth stayed dead for very long. He would see Kakarot again one day, and he would settle the score and in the end when he was victorious, he may chose not to return him to the afterlife. Maybe.

A/N:

Big thank you to everyone who has reviewed/followed/faved thus far! Especially to my reviewers Chikyu and bigblukrew. Coming out of fanfiction retirement was a little bit scary and I'm glad people are at least curious to see where this thing is going!

I tried to write from Vegeta's perspective more here, which was not easy since I am not used to writing Vegeta, let alone introspective Vegeta. I hope I did an okay job capturing him, or at least how he would behave in this part of the series.

For anyone reading the first chapter, when you read it on mobile the website italicizes the last 1/5th of the fic. I have no idea why it does this and it appears completely normal on the desktop site. I have no idea how to fix it to be quite honest.

Anyway thank you for sticking with me/ joining me. There will for sure be one more chapter. Possibly two more if my last idea sounds decent on paper and not just in my head!

See you then!

-V