Thanks everyone for waiting for me to finish the "The Missing Rose" and to get through the holidays. Now that those are done I should be on top of updates again. So, again, I'll stick up a disclaimer – I don't own Final Fantasy VII – since I like this story enough that I don't want to see it torn down.
ALSO, an important note on the story: A few days ago I figured I should make sure all my descriptive facts were accurate for this story. To check that out I got on my copy of FFVII and ran around the Gold Saucer for a lovely little while. Gah! As I ran through the Wonder Square I realized there are only two rooms and the fortune telling machine is in the second room not the first. I'm so sorry! I decided to keep the fortune teller where I accidentally put it, but I'll go back and mesh the second and third floors into a single second floor. Anyway, now that I've revealed that, on with the fic!
"Aaagghh!"
Alarm clocks didn't have the capacity to screech as loudly as Cid did the following morning, and there was no better sound to wake up to than a screaming human being. Thankfully only the guys next door heard the sound.
Cloud threw open the door with a bang, Barret behind him and Denzel rubbing his eyes sleepily. Inside the hotel room, Vincent stood, fully dressed, by the window, a single eyebrow raised in barest amusement. Nanaki nosed his way from under the covers on his bed, looking none surprised to see them standing in the doorway ready to take out whatever had strangled an angry scream from their typically stoic pilot.
Upon seeing Vincent's placid expression, Cloud understood there was no cause for concern. So in indifference, he leaned back against the entrance wall, arms folded. Denzel yawned once and came to lean against the wall near Cloud, eyes half shut.
Not catching on, Barret forced his way past Cloud and looked around for Cid. "Wha's goin' on here?" He located the source of the sound coming from the bathroom, the shower running.
"Yuffie," Nanaki explained simply.
Sure enough, Cid's angry cussing soon burst through the closed door as the water shut off. Barret grunted and lowered his gunarm.
"How early is it?" Nanaki shuffled the tangle of covers around with his paws to see the alarm clock on the bedside table. Vincent saved him the trouble.
"5:30."
Barret frowned. "What's he doin' up so early. I thought this was a vacation."
Nanaki settled back down under the blankets, kicking out his back paws and stretching out full on the mattress. "Trying to stay one step ahead of Yuffie I suppose."
"She's made Cid her target," Vincent explained.
Barret gave a grimace. "Better him than us."
They heard some noises emerging from inside the bathroom, each sound punctuated by a distinct swear word. Cloud watched the door, faintly curious what Yuffie had done to cause such an outburst. He had no doubt that if she was awake, she was laughing her little heart out in devilish glee.
"Cloud," Nanaki alerted him.
Cloud frowned at Nanaki, not understanding, but suddenly something slumped against his side. Glancing down, Cloud saw that Denzel had slid into him, his body swaying on its feet as he teetered on the realm of unconsciousness. Hesitating only a moment, Cloud wrapped an arm around Denzel's shoulders to hold him up.
"Back to bed," Cloud spoke softly.
"Mmm," Denzel blinked awake again. "But I want to know what happened."
Barret grumbled in agreement. "I'm beat, but I want ta know too." With that he marched to the bathroom door and rapped on it hard. "Yo! You gonna tell us wha's goin' on?"
"Hold your britches!" Cid barked from inside. Moments later the door opened. Barret backed up; his face contorted as he struggled not to snort and laugh aloud. Even Cloud had a hard time staying expressionless.
Cid stood in the doorway, shirtless and red-faced. His normally blond hair stood straight up, something sticky gluing it together in little tufts while here and there, patches of pink highlights stuck out prominently.
"I'm gonna kill that brat," he swore.
Nanaki sniffed the air. "You smell like chicken."
"Chicken bouillon in the shower head," Cid's voice was tight with anger; it was a wonder he didn't explode again, "and red Jell-o mix in the sink faucet."
Cloud perceived the situation and made a decision. "To bed, Denzel. Come on."
Denzel stared half-believingly at Cid's wild mess of hair. Cloud urged him along with a hand on his back, forcing him out of the room before things really got somewhere.
In the hallway they released a few soft chuckles although Cloud cautioned Denzel not to mention it to the others. A bit more awake now, Denzel dared ask, "Can we go around the Gold Saucer?"
"This early?" Cloud looked skeptically at Denzel's soft brown hair sticking out on one side, flat on the other, and the tired expression on his face.
"Please?" Denzel rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and begged again, his eyes brighter than before.
Cloud thought for a moment while he looked down at himself. He wanted to get into his normal clothes if he were to walk in public. And Denzel needed a mini makeover too.
"Comb your hair and get dressed," Cloud consented.
"Yay!" Denzel cheered.
Cloud pulled out the key to their room. "And be quiet about it."
Denzel nodded and bounded into the room with vigor.
Cloud started by showing Denzel the different squares one by one before asking where he wanted to start. Naturally, Denzel requested the Speed Square. The announcement surprised Cloud. Since Denzel looked up to him so much, Cloud had expected him to want to attend the Battle Square or even the Chocobo Square first; but it seemed Denzel was smarter than he sometimes acted. At the Battle Square, he was legally too young to participate, so he would only watch – and that only if he had an adult with him – and again at the Chocobo Square he was too young legally to either bet or ride. If Denzel were two years older then maybe he could count as an amateur jockey, but that was considering he even wantedto race chocobos. That left the final adrenaline pumping attraction: the Speed Square.
Six in the morning – Cloud was not very eager to ride a high speed rollercoaster that he had no control over. Motorcycles, no problem. Snowboards, not too bad. Crowded and over-heated trucks, manageable. Rollercoaster rides? To be honest, he had never been on one.
But he wasn't about to admit that.
Cloud paid for the ride with his nearly unlimited supply of GP and the two of them clambered into the seats.
The mechanics gave a lurch like the gears hadn't been oiled for centuries. That's when Cloud felt his stomach fly away. After that, he couldn't really remember anything. Denzel screaming and laughing. Random "targets" appearing in front of them to shoot for points. A sharp turn, a sudden plunge. Too much to take in all at once.
At least Denzel had fun.
Cloud swayed off the ride feeling as though he had lost twenty years of his life, and that was saying something considering all the time he had lost already. Denzel didn't seem to notice, and away they went to trade in their score for a fake masamune. It was only then that Cloud threw up, and, in light of that, Denzel kindly didn't accept the replica sword.
As soon as the others in their group woke up, they took turns showing the kids around. Yuffie and Tifa pulled shift late in the afternoon, and on Yuffie's insistence they spent most of the time in the Chocobo Square. In the main center of the busy room, Yuffie showed Denzel and Marlene how to place bets and the best way of knowing who would win. Of course her methods only worked fifty percent of the time, but she claimed she hadn't tried to pick the winner half the time.
Fifteen minutes into their tutorial of betting, Tifa received a call and stepped onto the front steps to have a clearer conversation. Taking advantage of Tifa's absence, Yuffie gathered Denzel and Marlene close.
"Your turn." She laid out the information pamphlets on each of the top jockeys for the upcoming S class race. "Who are we betting on?"
Marlene squinted at the pictures of the riders and their chocobos. Most of the proud birds were colored black or gold. One picture in particular caught her eye. Denzel beat her to it, however.
"That's Cloud!"
"WHAT?!" Yuffie squawked, pressing her nose against the picture. "That jerk! Why didn't he tell us he was racing today?"
"Didn't want a crowd?" Denzel shrugged.
Yuffie dropped the papers and marched over to one of the registration ladies standing to the side of the dimmed room. The woman certainly wasn't the average worker. Her crazy hair and make-up caused her to stand out even in the room filled with oddly dressed people.
"Ester?" Yuffie stopped a step short of mashing the woman's toes. "Has Cloud been here today?"
Ester smiled. "In fact, he was here a half hour ago. He's in for the next S class race."
Yuffie immediately turned on the children and pointed a finger the air. "Well, that proves it! Lesson's over. All you have to know is this: whenever Cloud races, always bet all you have on him."
They stared back at her.
"What are you waiting for?!" Yuffie grabbed each of their wrists and pulled them behind her like tugboats. "The race is gonna start soon. We have to hurry!"
Twenty minutes later, Tifa walked in to find Yuffie dancing around and cheering that this was her best jackpot win yet. She had not only bet through the system, but with a little predictive insight she had swept the betters clean with a guess that Cloud would beat the previous record for fastest time.
But even with her friend and the kids so happy, Tifa could not manage a sincere smile. Covertly, she slipped her PHS into her pocket and forced a smile as she dragged her steps toward her happy friends.
The evening came suddenly, taking them by surprise. Denzel found his energy waning, but Marlene could hardly stay awake. They had played hard in the Wonder Square after the Chocobo races:
Denzel stopped, looking at the basketball mini-court and wondering why he hadn't noticed it when first walking in yesterday. Yuffie caught his look and refuted, "Don't bother. That one's rigged."
"How do you know that it's rigged," Denzel asked.
Yuffie stood importantly, "Because I would have beaten it by now!"
Denzel stared at the backboard and hoop before glancing at Tifa. "Can I?" His money spent, Denzel had resorted to begging with his eyes.
Tifa gave in and within three throws Denzel had mastered the game.
Marlene, exhausted, fell asleep on her father's chest and Barret declared it an early night for them both. However the Gold Saucer was hosting a play at the Event Square that night and the group in general agreed to end the day with that. Denzel in particular opposed to the idea, claiming plays were for girls; but when Tifa mentioned Cloud's experience…
"You acted in a play?" Denzel stared. "For real?"
Cloud tensed up immediately.
Tifa gave a light smirk. "The handsome prince – the lead character of the play."
Cloud turned to her warily. "How do you even know that?"
Tifa shrugged innocently, playing off the moment with a bit of lighthearted honesty. "Aerith confided in me about you."
In times past, Denzel had acquired a sixth sense for understanding his hero. The slight downward cast of the eyes and the guarded way Cloud stood affirmed that there would either be a confrontation or a slip of trust. Denzel watched them. Tifa stood with her eyes frozen in a rueful stare. "When is the play starting?" Denzel interrupted before Cloud could verbally react. Denzel stood nervously, anxious at the tense feeling that had suddenly penetrated the atmosphere.
Finally Cloud broke the silence, stepping away with the murmured words, "I'm going to find Vincent."
Denzel's eyes dropped to the floor. They hardly fought, Tifa and Cloud. The only times they let any problems fabricate into words was when it involved some painful part of Cloud's past. Cloud barely ever talked about his childhood or teenage years. In fact, the more Denzel thought about it, the more he realized he hardly knew his guardian. It seemed like every piece of Cloud's past was shrouded in pain and grief. Surely misery was not all Cloud had known. He had to have at least been happy at some time…right?
Tifa sniffed.
"Huh?" Denzel looked up to see tears dripping from Tifa's eyes to the floor. "Tifa?"
Again, Tifa sniffled, this time a bit louder.
They stood near the entrance to the Event Square and people passed them periodically. In a moment of insight and sensible compassion Denzel grabbed Tifa's hand and led her out through the Station to a quieter corner: the Round Square.
Using the GP Yuffie helped him earn in the Chocobo Square, Denzel paid for the gondola and tugged along his martial artist mother. Seated opposite each other, they waited for the ride to begin. Once the wheels above them began moving the gondola, Tifa whispered a thank you.
Denzel released a nervous sigh. "Are you okay?" Tifa offered a shaky smile. Denzel frowned and Tifa dropped the act, shaking her head once.
She gazed out the window sorrowfully. After a drawn out moment she whispered, "Oh, Denzel, what am I doing?"
Denzel quirked his head and suddenly got the feeling he had made a decision he would regret, at least to some degree. He had willingly locked himself in a box with a crying female. He felt helpless and more than a little under-qualified to deal with the situation. He glanced out the window to see the station far behind them. Well, too late to go back.
"I- I want to help him, but I always end up saying something wrong." Tifa choked on a quiet sob. "I just want things to be normal for once."
Denzel nodded in agreement although Tifa missed it. His life rode the awkward line between childhood and adulthood. Most of the time he could live happily as a child of the household, but there were times, dark moments in his life, when he was forced to understand things no one should. Things like death. Street living. Moving on. Abandonment. And yes, a distraught mother.
"I've tried so hard to help him, but–" Tifa drew in a shuddering breath. "I don't think I can. I'm too close to the problems he's dealing with." She looked at Denzel for the first time since they had entered the dinky cable car. For a moment she just looked outright scared. Denzel held his breath as she sat frozen like that for a second before her expression collapsed in tears again. "Denzel, I'm part of the things he's trying to move past."
Denzel released his breath, quirking his head slightly. What?
Tifa used a finger to wipe the wetness from her cheeks and under her eyes. "I'm afraid, Denzel," she looked at him squarely, "I am so afraid that Cloud will leave one day, and it won't be because he's sick or depressed like when he had Geostigma."
Denzel nodded knowingly to usher her on.
"It won't even be because he feels guilty or afraid." Tifa breathed in slow and deep. "I'm scared that one day Cloud will leave because he won't want to see me anymore. He won't be able to stand it. He won't–" She choked on her words. She tried again, but her voice had softened to a whisper. "He won't want to remember me."
"Wh–" Denzel paused to consider whether interrupting was a good idea or not. Shrugging mentally, he pushed on with his question. "Why would Cloud want to forget you? He cares about you, right?"
Tifa conceded, but insisted, "He does, but I'm just a walking memory. You see, Denzel. Cloud has…He's confronted his past enough that he can move on and get past it. The problem is, I'm always around to slip up and stick a needle in his throat. I remind him of things he probably wishes he could forget… I think I make him feel guilty." She paused, sniffing a bit and glancing out the window at the stars and fireworks display. "Sometimes I think I'm the only reason he keeps coming back to Seventh Heaven. If I didn't guilt him into making the bar his home base, he might never return."
Denzel stopped her. "You're not making sense."
"Hm?" Tifa looked genuinely confused.
"You said that you're afraid Cloud will leave because of you, but then you just told me that you're the only reason he comes home. Which is it?"
Tifa sighed. "Both."
The cart swayed to a momentary halt and they both glanced out the open windows to see why. On Denzel's side the chocobo race track flashed hideous fluorescent colors. A second later a herd of chocobos scampered past their window. Presently the wheels on top of their car turned and they moved on down the path around the Gold Saucer.
The air was quiet then. Tifa sniffed once more, her tears gone. Sighing, she admitted quietly, "I'm thinking of going out with someone."
Denzel started like someone had given him a shock. "Like a date?" He shouldn't have acted so surprised. After all Tifa was a popular, single woman in Edge. Perhaps Denzel had just made it his preconception that Tifa and Cloud would continue to act as his parents for the rest of his life. Instantly his security felt threatened.
To Tifa, however, Denzel's outward reaction brought a light laugh from her. "Yes, Denzel. I'm thinking of dating someone. I met him a little while before we left." She gave a strange sort of half-laugh that told Denzel she didn't really think anything was funny. "He called me today. He explained that he wanted to ask me out earlier, but–" She cut off abruptly, sealing away the rest of her words while she reflected on a memory. "But anyway. He asked me out. Officially. Said that as soon as I got back he'd like to take me out somewhere."
"What's his name?" Denzel asked slyly, wondering if he needed to worry about both of his guardians jumping up suddenly one day and leaving him.
"Johnny."
Oh great. The subject of interest was someone Denzel knew! Johnny the charmer. Johnny the clumsy gentleman. Johnny the honest-hearted, decent guy that probably had more than just a chance at stealing Tifa's heart. Things just got better and better. But this was Tifa's happiness they were discussing. Denzel had no right to compromise her decisions even if it ended in him wandering the ruins of Midgar again. Dimly he realized Tifa was talking again, but her topic had inexplicably drifted toward Cloud once more.
"…about Cloud. I don't know if my presence is helping or hurting him anymore. If I fall in love and get married, that will leave him by himself. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, and because I'm not married, you and Marlene and Cloud are my top priorities. Right now I have to focus on helping you three. If I have to let Cloud go," she stopped short but forced herself to finish the thought, "then so be it." She swallowed dryly. "But I won't abandon you and Marlene. You've already had enough of that in your life."
Tifa paused for a moment, studying Denzel. "I'm sorry. I've just been going in circles."
Denzel shrugged. "More like triangles," he quipped.
Tifa shook her head and released a smile. "I feel better. Thank you."
Denzel nodded politely. He could feel the ride slowing to a stop. "In all that did you figure out what you are going to do about Cloud? …Or Johnny?"
With a sigh, Tifa smiled again. "Cloud? No. But I'm going to keep trying. If I'm not what he needs…then I suppose we'll know that the day he leaves and never returns. But Johnny?" Her smile brightened just slightly. "I think I could use the break. Even if it doesn't go anywhere, everyone needs friends, right?"
The doors opened up to where they had started and Tifa led the way out. Denzel dragged his feet a bit, glad he helped Tifa but not so happy he now had a reason to worry about Cloud abandoning him.
"Are we going to see the end of the play?" Denzel asked.
Tifa frowned. "I think I'm going to get some sleep. I can take you to the Event Square if you want to see it though. Cid, Yuffie, and Nanaki should all be in there."
Denzel smiled. "No thanks. I'm alright not seeing it. Besides, knowing those guys, Yuffie probably got in an argument with a vendor and people are probably complaining about Cid snoring while Nanaki is likely trying to get Yuffie calmed down enough so that she doesn't start a fight."
Tifa laughed in agreement. "Alright. I guess we'll skip the drama and head to the hotel." As Tifa led the way to the Ghost Square she uttered a resolution. "I'll talk to him tomorrow."
"Johnny?"
"No, Cloud." She looked down to meet his eyes. "Maybe I can make up with him. Then things will be okay again."
"Mm," Denzel nodded. After a minute he released the question jumping around his thoughts. "Cloud said he was going to find Vincent. Where's Vincent?" Denzel asked. At least then he might know where Cloud had gone.
"Vincent?" Tifa sounded infinitely better than twenty minutes ago. "I think he's in the Battle Square. Ever since Deep Ground he's been trying to develop new limit breaks. You know what I'm talking about?"
"Yeah."
"Cloud probably went to fight out his frustration or to just sit with Vincent."
"Yeah."
Tifa stopped. "Denzel, are you okay?"
"Yeah."
She gave him a doubtful look. "Well, thank you again for what you did back there." She gave him that fond motherly smile he knew so well on her. "I know you've got my back."
Denzel shrugged. "Sure."
Tifa placed a hand on his back and led him forward. "Why don't you get some sleep. Barret wants to take you and Marlene to North Corel tomorrow so you can get all the information you need for your paper."
Denzel nodded and let her walk him straight to his and Barret's and Cloud's room. He wasn't thinking about the paper. His mind had even managed to shrug off most of Tifa's worried ranting. All that he could think of was Cloud and how one day he might get tired of living with them and leave them forever.
Well, I don't think there are any more important notes to add down here. So…see ya'll, and I hope you had a good holiday month!
-Dante