Chapter 8

D made his way out of the school not aware that Asher had not followed him just needing to escape. what had happened in the locker room just kept repeating itself in his mind over and over again;

Previously;

I felt a yank on my arm and looked up to see Kevin looking at me with a deep blush on his face, If i was still Double D I would probably have the same blush as him, It was hard to keep the blood from rushing to my face. while everyone was looking at Ed as he tried to figure out why Eddy was laughing and Rolph was giving him an indulgent smile and saying something to bring what had happened to attention Kevin started to drag me away and towards the locker room. I thought about resisting but my body refused to listen to me, and it wouldn't let me have my arm back.

We made it into the locker room unnoticed, lucky for Kevin, my boys would surely attack if they saw me being forcibly yanked away. the clang of the locker room door closing brought me out of my musings to face a no longer blushing but determined, calm, and (for most people but not D) intimidating Kevin. If D had been a lesser man that stare would have withered him on the spot, No No NO! I feel weak! I am starting to feel powerless! Not again, Never again, I can't go back. I WON'T go back! he should not be effecting me this way, I am a rock! Why do I feel like his eyes are melting me and sending butterflies through me!? I need my sensei. I slowly started to back away from those burning eyes but they followed me until I was pressed to the wall...trapped...this only increased the panic I was feeling. I felt short of breath and claustrophobic my mind was in complete turmoil, however I don't blame Kevin for not noticing because just like sensei taught me, 'No matter if an entire hurricane is going off inside of you, you must always remain a rock on the surface.' I never even gave him a chance to back up and give me some space not that I am thinking about it I feel kinda sorry for him.

The panic refused to abate and what he said next made me go to the breaking point, "Double D I have to tell you something...I have been waiting seven years for the right time to tell you this...heck I don't think now is the right time but I have to tell you now I can't hold it back anymore now that you are here….Double D, no Edward Vincent I love you." All of this was said in a nervous wavering voice like he wasn't even sure what he was talking about and I snapped the monster that was created by four years of torment, two years of merciless training, and three years of being a merciless tormenter all compiled into seven years of bottled up loneliness and depression refused to stay dormant in the face of both my wildest dreams and nightmares coming to life. I love him I have always loved him….but he doesn't love me he loves that good for nothing little wimp Double D but he doesn't exist anymore I killed him and took over I am now strong and as much as I love him I could never go back to that weakling that I used to be I need to make him understand that I am not the one he loves. "listen to me Kevin I know this may be hard to believe this but try to understand Double D doesn't exist anymore he is gone, forever he won't come back. You don't love-"

"That isn't true! You are Double D. You may have changed but so have I and from what I can see i like your changes just as much as I did who you used to be" he cut me off making the blood and a tiny bit of hope(not that I would ever admit that) before I let myself come back into perspective.

" How can you say that when you don't even know the half of me!"

"What don't I know Double D!? I know you love science and math. I know you have OCD. I know that you are one of the fastest and most graceful swimmers of this generation. I know you make straight A's. I know you have countless awards and medals. I know that you were hurt bad enough to change your personality. I know that you have some sort of power and that you had to have worked hard for it. I know-"

"Enough! You don't know me! you do not know the thoughts that are in my head they are too complex for someone as simple as you to possibly comprehend!" thats it D hurt him, throw it in his face make him understand that something between the two of us is impossible...no matter the pain. not giving him the chance to respond I turn around and march out of the room not paying attention to how much strength he put into opening the door causing it to bang open.

"Wait Double-"

"NO!"

"But, i was telling the truth-"

"No Kevin, you were not! you do NOT love me!"

"Yes I do"

"NO Kevin you DON'T! You love Double D, and he is gone, he died three years ago, I am all that is left of him, but i assure you he is gone he has been gone for a long time, and he is not coming back, EVER! you don't love me, you love the scrawny wimp that I used to be, and I am not ever going back to that not even for you," I stopped still breathing heavily and turned to my friends

"Come on David, Asher, we are going home! lets go!" the four of them came and surrounded me and started to leave and as they left I gave one last parting comment one that crushed my heart as much as i'm sure it crushed Kevin's

"It would be better for you to move on I am not Double D, I am just D, I am sorry but the one that you love is gone, Double D is dead. "