Everything In Its Right Place 9/?
Title: Once Things Look Up
Pairings: Callie/Mark, Meredith/ Derek implied
Rating: R (for language)
Disclaimer: Not mine
Summary: ….hmmm……look at the title
I put a wager on uncertainty
It's funny when you wager how you feel
I hit the breaking point
Then broke on through
I'm never certain when it comes to you
Once things look up
I come falling down
Too deep to take a step
And look around
Once things look up
I come falling down
Stand back and marvel at what we have made
It's hard to notice when you run away
Wouldn't it nice
If we could both be right
So we could go to bed each day
Without a single fight
And we would be alright
And you could say goodnight
Instead of just
Goodbye
Once I look up
All comes falling down
Callie winced against her pillow at the sound of Mark emptying out the contents of his stomach in the bathroom. There was a cold--or the flu--or--something that was attacking half of the hospital and they had both been sick for the past couple of days.
She sat up in their bed and adjusted the white comforter over her legs before reaching for a clean tissue from the nightstand and blowing her nose. She sniffled and rested her back against the pillows piled up behind her. The television was on and Oprah was giving away things.
The toilet flushed and she turned her head as mark stepped out of the bathroom, holding his stomach and looking miserable. His face pale, his wrinkled white tee-shirt looking sadly baggy as he hunched his shoulders. She pouted empathetically at him, then patted the mattress, motioning for him to join her.
He sighed, but dragged his feet towards the bed anyway, crawling under the sheets, then laying his head on her lap. He looked at the TV screen, but his eyes closed automatically.
She cleared her raspy throat as she gently massaged his scalp with her fingers, "How are you feeling?" He groaned in response and she frowned. They'd both been sick, but he had taken it the worst. She had gotten rid of the virus rather quickly and now was only mildly suffering of the occasional upset stomach and dizziness, but he was still pretty dead, "Is your stomach still hurting?" he nodded to the best of his abilities as she reached own to rub his belly affectionately, "Poor baby." She cooed.
"How about you? Did you stop throwing up?" He asked, turning his head to look up at her.
"Yeah." She nodded, "My throat's a little sore and I've got a runny nose, but I'm okay." She said, and wrinkled her nose.
He smiled drowsily, "I love your nose."
She chuckled, "You're just high on all those antibiotics." She leaned forwards and pressed her forehead to his.
He flinched away suddenly, coughing his lungs out into the blanket. She looked up at the ceiling and tried not to laugh at the anti-romanticism, "Oh, honey--" She rubbed his back as he convulsed for a few seconds, then finally stopped, his face still buried in the blankets, "I'll get you some tea." She said, starting to scoot off the bed.
"No." He said, wrapping an arm around her waist, "It won't stay in there anyway. Just--cuddle with me."
"Are you sure?" She asked as he moved to lie down beside her and she scooted down the bed, letting him spoon her.
"Yeah. Just--nap with me. Turn off Oprah."
She shut the TV off and they slept for an hour.
Callie tripped over her own feet and she stumbled in the living room, "Shit." She cursed and jumped when Mark appeared behind her, kissing her shoulder as he passed her.
"What's wrong with you?" He laughed, then paused, looking at her, "You going out?"
"Um--" She stammered, flustered, "--no--yes. I'm just--going to get you a refill from the hospital--"
"Already?"
"Yeah--you went through that thing like---fast."
"Oh. Well, give me a minute. I'll go with you."
"No! No. You know, I have to stop by Meredith's to--drop off some--cough---drops. Cause you know, Derek's all--sick too."
"Okay." He said, wearily.
"Okay." She said and kissed his cheek before she left the apartment in a sprint.
About an hour later, she sat in an exam room, her feet dangling off the edge as she nervously drummed her fingers on her lap, Cristina stood beside her, thumbing through her file.
"I just--have this thing that won't go away. The--barfing and the--dizziness--it's the flu still, right?"
Cristina sighed, exasperated, and turned around to face her, "Well, you DO have a cold."
Callie sighed and clutched her chest, "Oh, thank god."
"But you're also pregnant." Cristina added, closing the chart.
"Shit." She squealed and leaned over, bracing herself on her knees as her head hung forward, "SHIT." She looked up at Cristina, "Shit!" She said, as if demanding further explanation.
"Dude! I didn't do it!"
"Oh--shit." She said again and lied back on the gurney.
"I'm sorry--but, like, a year and half ago, weren't you DYING for a mini-human?"
"Oh--SHIT." Callie said again.
Cristina took a step closer and hovered over Callie, "Are you okay?" No answer. "Are to having a breakdown?" No answer. "SHIT." Cristina cursed, "I'll go get Meredith."
About two minutes later, the door opened and in came Meredith, being dragged by Cristina, "Cristina, stop!" Meredith complained both stopped as she was met with a wide eyed Callie sitting on the gurney, her hands gripping the edge of it tightly, "Callie?" Meredith took a cautious step forward, "You okay?"
Callie opened her mouth a few times, but no sound came out and she simply shook her head.
"What's wrong with her?" Meredith asked Cristina.
"She seems to be pregnant." Cristina said bluntly.
"Shit." Meredith said, in a bit more enthusiastic tone. She then moved towards Callie and touched her forehead, then turned to look at Cristina, "She seems fine. Is this not a good thing?"
"Meredith--she's lapsed into catatonic schizophrenia. What do YOU think? Your medical opinion."
"Callie--" Meredith said, snapping her fingers in front of Callie's face, to which she received a rather annoyed look.
Cristina leaned in, "She can hear you. She can see you. She's freaking out. She forgot how to talk, I think."
"I know that." Meredith hissed, "Callie, it's okay."
The door swung open and they all looked to see Izzie step in. Callie sighed heavily into her hands.
"Meredith--oh, sorry. What's going on?" Izzie asked, looking from Cristina to Meredith.
Cristina pointed at Callie, "Pregnant. Not happy." Then pointed at Meredith, "Completely useless." And pointed at herself, "Never know what to do with people and feelings."
"Oh--"Izzie nodded uncomfortably, "Callie?" She stepped back as Callie lifted her head and held her index finger up, insinuating that she did not want to hear it, not from her anyway.
"You can't just stay all quiet and weird, Callie--" Cristina said, "--I order you to talk. NOW." After a few seconds of no response, Cristina threw her hands up, "I'm never having kids."
"Why exactly are you freaking out?" Meredith asked, "What's the worse that can happen? You love Mark and he loves you. And it's not like you're exactly lacking the financial part--you'll work it out."
Still nothing.
"Callie--" Izzie said, placing a hand on her hip, "--speak or I will call McSteamy myself right now."
"I will kick your ass from here to Sunday, Stevens, I swear." Callie growled and they all took a frightful step back and she took a deep breath, "One year was good for semi-happy moments. Relationships get bad eventually. That's my track-record. SHIT."
"What are you talking about?" Cristina asked, clearly confused, "Sloan, while he's not sleeping around anymore, still has the man whore spirit. You think he won't be advertising that he knocked you up? He's going to be selling tee-shirts."
"He doesn't want kids." Callie said, biting her lips for a second, "We talked about it at the wedding--GOD, the wedding--" Her palm flew to her forehead and she closed her eyes, "It was that night. Oh, shit. We talked about it and--he wasn't ready for kids and I said it was okay and now--this is all your fault!" She pointed at Meredith.
"What did I do?!" Meredith complained.
"You and your alcoholic tendencies. Does anyone really need to drink that much, Meredith?"
"It's called a CONDOM."
"We were REALLY DRUNK." She explained.
"Does--he know you're here?" Izzie asked.
"Yeah. I told him I came to get his refill." Her eyes filled with tears and she shook her head, "If he breaks up with me over THIS, I will break his knees with a bat."
"Hey!" Cristina exclaimed, "If he dumps you because of this, I will make sure he loses the ability to reproduce."
Callie smiled, then looked at her watch, "I've been gone for two hours. I should go."
The door opened and Alex stepped in, "There you guys are. Sloan is running around claiming you three have his girlfriend." He noticed Callie and he nodded politely, "What's up, Torres?"
"Hey, Alex." She greeted and smiled.
"So--" He continued, shoving his hands in his coat pockets, "What's with the girl meeting? Who's knocked up?" He started to laugh, but noticing the silence in the room, his eyes widened and he looked at Callie again, "Torres, you're knocked up?! Damn." Cristina smacked his shoulder and he hissed, "You're a man, Yang. Don't hit people. I was just making an observation. Is this why Sloan is beating people up for information?" He laughed, "You need to go out there. He's freaking out."
Callie seemed confused, "Why is he freaking--oh, crap, I left my cell phone at home."
Alex sighed and shook his head, "Tsk-tsk. I'm staying out of this." He turned on his heel and opened the door, just as Mark was about to come in and he almost bumped into him, "She's in here." Alex informed before scurrying away.
Mark pushed the door open and stepped quietly inside. His jaw was set and he seemed angry as he stared at Callie, who sat on the gurney, with her face still hidden in her hands. He then turned towards the three other women in the room, who quickly glanced away.
"We're going to--give you some privacy." Meredith offered, pulling Izzie behind her by the arm. As Cristina followed, she stopped and glared at Mark, "Be NICE."
The door closed behind them and Callie looked up to meet Mark's eyes, "I forgot my phone. I'm sorry."
He sighed and scratched his stubble, "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." She said before he walked towards her and wrapped his arms around her.
"What's going on?" He asked, pulling away to look down at her, "And if I hear the word 'refill' again, I'm going to be pissed. I'm not even taking that crap anymore."
"Remember the night of the wedding?"
"Yeah."
"Remember what we DID at the wedding?"
"Yeah." he said, a slight smile on his lips.
"And what we did later that night at home? Twice."
"Yeah." He said, recalling the events of that night.
"And then later in the shower--Mark are you not getting this?! I'm pregnant!"
His hands fell from where he held her and so did his face.
She hopped off the gurney and paced around the room.
"You're sure?" He asked.
"Yeah." She answered, leaning against the window sill.
He let out a long breath and looked at her, "Wow."
"Yeah."
"WOW."
Her heart was beating a mile a minute and her palms were sweating, "Are you going to say anything that requires more than a syllable? I'm freaking out here."
"I'm sorry. I'm just--processing." he remained silent for a while before he looked at her again, "It's good. It's going to be good--right? I mean--it's a baby. They're--small. It's good."
"Really?" She asked, not really believing him.
"Yeah." he nodded, "Come here."
She walked into his arms, but she felt the apprehension in his embrace, but he reassured her, so she had to accept it.
"You know what? I need to get some water. I'll be right back." he said, kissing her head, then her cheek.
"Okay." She smiled before he kissed her lips and left the room without another glance her way.
Mark passed the vending machines and didn't even pass the cafeteria. He wondered straight into the lobby, and soon he found himself driving.
Ten minutes after Mark walked out, Callie grabbed her purse and walked out of the exam room, her stone faced as she ran into Meredith and Cristina.
"What happened?" Meredith asked, concerned.
"Nothing." She answered, "He's gone. I don't know where he went, but he's gone." She nodded, then laughed bitterly, "I'm not even surprised. That's what kills me."
"Maybe he's not--"
"He is. I'm going home…"
Cristina leaned forward, "Callie, maybe he's just--freaking out…"
"No. He's not allowed to say that he's okay with this and then runaway like a fourteen year old girl and HIDE. That's not how it works." She sighed, "I'm just--going home--I--I don't know. I need to go home."
"Okay." Meredith said, touching her arm briefly, "I'll call you later."
There was a time lapse from Callie's drive from the hospital to the apartment. She never bothered to remove her jacket or drop her purse on the kitchen table as she usually did. She turned on a light in the living room and sat on the couch. When the tears started streaming down her face, she simply let them.
Derek stared at the man sitting on his trailer porch, his hands in his gray robe, his nose red from sneezing. He leaned against the door to the trailer, waiting for Mark to do anything other than sit there, staring at the ground.
"You LEFT her." Derek said, incredulously.
"Shut up." mark warned, still burning holes into the ground with his eyes.
"Yeah, but you LEFT her. Right after you LIED and told her you were okay with having a kid. You're an idiot."
"I know that!" Mark yelled, turning to glare at Derek, "I think I'm allowed to have a minor freak out!"
"Mm-no." Derek said, shaking his head, "Not when you've said it's okay. Plus, she's freaking out too. You--fucked up."
"Why are you in the trailer? You're married." Mark asked, suddenly perplexed.
"I've been isolated because I'm sick. Don't change the subject. What are you going to do?"
"I don't know."
"Well, why did you say you were okay with it in the first place? And weren't you dying for her to marry you anyway? What do you think happens after you get married, Mark?"
"I don't know! I was thinking maybe we'd get a dog or something--have anniversaries and threaten to divorce each other--it's just--a lot."
"You going to break up with her?"
"NO." He said almost instantly, "I love her. She's everything now, you know?"
"Then what's the problem?"
There was a pause as Mark stared at Derek, "What if I mess up? What if we have this kid and I mess up?"
"You won't if you don't want to. All you can do is love your family--and whatever YOUR parents did, Mark? You're not them. She knows that. Otherwise, do you think she'd even bother with you?"
He groaned and ran his hand through his hair, "Shit, I LEFT HER! She probably thinks I LEFT her. I'm an asshole."
"Go buy some flowers and sports cup and apologize until you lose your voice." Derek offered as Mark climbed in his car and drove off.
The door opened and Callie looked up from where she sat on the couch, surprise written all over her tear stained face, "Mark?"
"Hey, baby." he said, closing the door cautiously before walking slowly toward the crying woman looking at him like he was a ghost.
She stood up as he set a white shopping bag down on the coffee table and handed her a bouquet of white daisies.
"Yeah, it's me. What happened?"
She snatched the flowers from his grasp and threw them on the floor, "What happened?! Where the hell did you go?!"
"I--" He flinched as she smacked his shoulder, "--I went to get you flowers!"
"For four hours?! You left me at the hospital alone, you asshole!"
"I know. I know--" He tried to reach for her but she only took a step back, "--you thought I was going to leave you? Callie, I wasn't going to leave you--" She slapped him before he could finish a thought, "--Okay. Owe."
"Where the HELL did you go, Mark!"
"Okay, I freaked out. But only for a minute!"
"Oh, that is so much better! THANK GOD it was just a minor freak out, you fucking asshole!" She yelled, turning her back to him.
"Callie--calm down…"
She whipped her body around to face him, fresh tears wetting her face, "I'm pregnant and wondering if you're really okay with this, and there you are, lying through you're fucking teeth! What's wrong with you?!"
"I know! I'm sorry!" He said, finally grabbing her fighting arms and pulling her into a tight embrace until she finally stopped fighting him, "I'm sorry." He repeated, then kissed the top of her head, "I'm not leaving. I'm sorry."
"You have to tell me when you're freaking out about something, you can't just say you'll be right back and not come back." She mumbled into his shirt, before looking up at him, "Dumb ass."
He smiled after she chuckled and wiped her cheek dry, "I love you." He said and leaned down slightly to kiss her lips.
"What's that?" She sniffled and pointed at the bag on the table.
"Presents." He informed her, holding her hand as he reached down for it and holding it up for her.
"Groveling props." She corrected, then peaked inside the bag before taking it from his grasp and letting go of his hand to get a better look, "Chocolate, apple juice--" She stopped and giggled as she fished out a blue pacifier, "Is this for you or the baby?"
He watched her smile at him, her eyes still red from crying and the overwhelming desire to kiss her overtook him. He held her face in both hands and leaned forward, kissing her gently, savoring the moment--the salty taste of her tears on her lips. When they pulled apart, she melted against his chest and she let out a heavy breath, "Next time you feel like leaving me, tell me so I can hate you openly. I don't do well with surprises."
"I'm not leaving you. I can't sleep alone anymore, I'm fucked."
She pinched his side, and laughed along with him.
XXX