Invading colonial Australia
Disclaimer: Percy Jackson belongs to Rick Riordain.
You know, once more my life take a full on RPG turn. But then again, what do you expect. Gods, acquirable magical items. The only thing I can't do is level up. Or record things in a journal. Anyway, we have a treasure drove of magical items to find, and all of them are protected by various protections. Or something like that anyway. Except for Ares' sword. That's just protected by a lone moron. Not me, Ares. Anyway, Back to my life!
"What do you think Alex means?" asked Annabeth. Probably about the whole, everyone is going to die thing.
"It's obvious isn't it?" asked Thalia. "Zeus needs to keep me and Percy alive. So we stand a much smaller chance of dying than the rest." But that begs an important question. How safe is Annabeth then? I didn't say anything though. I didn't want to worry her.
"So watch your backs tonight." I said, walking off to my cabin. "You never know what might sneak into your room for dubious reasons." Annabeth and Thalia stared at me. "I mean monsters." Honest! My intentions are always good and, uh, otherstuff of that kind of nature.
"Oh right." said Annabeth and yawned, She walked towards her own cabin. Thalia also left. A hand grabbed my shoulder.
"We need to talk." said Alex. "It's about me." Okay. This was almost as bad as hearing him say, "it's about us." Which he once did. And our teacher took it the wrong way.
"Percy, I really don't know how to explain this, so I'm just going to. I'm changing."
"Changing? Oh no! You haven't converted to R en B have you? Please, you were our last hope!" I yelled, my voice almost cracking. I've lost too many friends to R en B over the past year. Their was Even, who innocently started listening to Britney Spears. Soon, he changed. And Steven, who was forced to listen to Christina Aguilera by his evil brother. Now, their gone, All gone.
"Percy, it's not that!" yelled Alex, and for the first time since I knew him, he was really angry. "I'm not able to retain myself! I'm a titan in the age of the gods. It's not meant to be."
"What do you mean?" I asked. I mean, if he really wanted to retain himself he should just buy a retainer. Ha Ha! First bad pun of the sequel!
"Percy, the gods were originally also titans. But then I did something really, really stupid." said Alex, looking down. "I wanted people to be able to live and learn and prosper and all that shit. So I flew to the sun. I brought fire down to men. And with it, they started advancing, and getting civilized. However I was chained to a rock while this was going on and a fucking eagle ate my liver every day. So I was looked over as it was." He looked bitter. Well, he had every right to be. But he managed to liver through the horrible situation. Fine. I'll stop the puns.
"I was always something of a loner so it didn't bother me. But the gods, it bothered them alright. When the humans changed the gods changed with them. They become focused in a way, and worshipped. Ares went from the god of problems, or problems with other people to the god of wars. People had invented ways of killing each other on an even greater scale. Aphrodite went from the goddesses of lust, or horniness to the goddesses of love. So I wondered if I was managing to create as much good as evil. But I failed to notice what was really happening." said Alex, sounding as bitter as pure coffee. Yay! Another analogy.
"Humans were changing. And the gods were changing with them. All seemed to match whatever humans expected them to match. And when I was freed, I thought that it wouldn't happen to me. I mean, the humans didn't really bother with the gods anymore. When I was freed, I just, I just wandered around searching for something. I didn't know what. Then I saw a statue of me in Rockefeller Centre. It was pretty accurate but it couldn't completely catch my dashingly good looks. There was even a game called Will Rock based on me. And then. And then, I realized. Humans do not realize it, they do not believe in me, but they remember me. Percy." said Alex, fixing me with a weird stare. "I'm changing to fit the part of modern civilization. Soon, I will be completely different." I realized he had his arms around himself, and he was almost shaking.
"I don't get it. What's so bad about changing?" I asked.
"Percy, this is not a willing change. It's not an exterior change. It's my very personality. Hades matches the human idea of dead, cold and impersonal. Poseidon matched the human idea of the sea, carefree, yet always completely focused on his goal. And Zeus, let's just say Zeus got polluted. And me. Me. I may loose myself." he said. "I'll need you to find me again if I do." He suddenly left before I could say anything else. I have an idea that it was a really personal thing to him. I had no idea what to do next. I went to sleep.
The next morning I went to breakfast, expecting that I would find the damn place in my half awake state. As always, I was right. Oh no. The quest. Their about to be announced. Dammit "Hello, fellow campers!" said Mr. D. looking over at us. " I see most of you are barely awake. This seems to be an excellent opportunity to gives you information vital to your survival. Now, Lord H, shall announce the lucky people who are out to save this slice of paradise! Here's H!"
"Hello mortals." said Hades, smiling brightly. "The following campers are going on a mission to save the camp! You will all see the oracle. But he won't see you, because he doesn't have any eyes. Anyway, representing the Ares cabin, we have Clarrise! Choose two companions and go find Ares's sword. Yay! Stab your own father in the back. And now, representing the Hermes cabin Gregory Smith! And a whoop whoop for him to. Same drill. Choose two people and go get us some golden apples. Representing the Apollo Cabin, we have Lennord finefellow! Same drill. Only you have to steal Athena's staff. Representing the Athena cabin, Annabeth Chase! Don't make me repeat myself, because I will kill you. Go get Troy's gate hinge! Now good luck!" Hades sat. We all waited. "You can go to the Oracle first Annabeth." Annabeth left. Thalia sat down next to me.
"Are you ready for this, Sea weed brain?" asked Thalia.
"I'm always ready, uh head lost in the clouds girl." I answered. Man, I gotta work on my snappy retorts.
"Nice one." said Thalia. "Do you know where the gate hinge is?" Ha! This calls for a lie that'll make me look intelligent despite the fact that it makes no sense what so ever.
"Next to the other half of the gate hinge." I said. Now, wait for it. Oh, there's Annabeth. She walked over to us.
"Guys, we have to go to the Caribbean." she said, and she looked really worried. Has the oracle told her dastardly tales of doom which is to follow? Or does the humidity in the Caribbean fizz up her hair? I need answers dammit!
"The Caribbean?" asked Thalia. "How is that part of America?"
"Wait." I said. "Does this mean there's a modern day version of Troy in the Caribbean? We could have a road trip!"
"To the Caribbean?" asked Annabeth. Man, she sure had hearing difficulties.
"We can just fly." said Thalia. "I'm sure my father wouldn't blast us out of the air." Good point. But at what cost? Airline ticket are expensive and I'm not made of money. I'm made up out bones, flesh, skin and nitrous oxide. Don't ask. It's part of being half a god.
"Where are we going to get the money?" I asked.
"By stealing it." said Thalia. Me and Annabeth stared at her. "Fine. We'll find another way. Wanna go sell camp half blood cookies?" It's amazing the sheer number of things I'm not informed about. Now camp half blood is also selling strawberry flavored cookies. Also choc chip Cyclopes, Mega munches Minnie Minotaurs (Chocolate flavored) and Super sweet Scylla's. (Basically a cookie with a lot of sugar worms sticking out of it.)
"Good idea, but no." said Annabeth. "The camp store will probably be handing out stuff for us." She set off, Thalia not far behind. I pulled Annabeth back slightly.
"Annabeth what did the Oracle tell you?" I asked. "He didn't make a comment about your looks did he? Besides he's blind and you look- Damn. I hate it when she gives me one of those looks and I feel unable to continue.
"Don't worry Percy. We will succeed. It said that much at least." she said and walked farther away. She's hiding something from me. Well, that a question with a duh answer but still. I don't like it.
Hades told us to go get the hinge, and quickly. According to Hades the hinge is going to be used to secure a gate. Well, that is what hinges are for. The sword and staff's power will fortify the gate, while Hades and Alex will use the apples to great and orchard. The power it supplies will then throw up a border, exactly like the one we used to have except this one is half blood friendly.
"Hello, what do you have for us?" asked Annabeth. Argus turned his many eyes on her. I've always wondered how anyone would blindside him. He didn't have to worry about dropping the soap if you know what I mean. Though it's probably better if you didn't.
"Three hundred cheetos courtesy of Lord Prommy." said Argus. Damn. Things were so screwed that even Prometheus changed his name to Alex so we have something we can casually call him. Besides, Mr. P just sounds, I don't know like some sort of toilet cleaner. "Also, Lord H has requested that Thalia takes this sword." He handed Thalia a long blade, with a tightly encrusted hilt. It was meant to be wielded with a shield, like a broadsword, but had far longer reach. How do I think of these things? "The gate hinge is rumored to be guarded by a servant of the sun god. It would be wise to try and beat the shit out of him with caution."
"This is going to be ridiculous." said Thalia.
"We are actually flying?" I asked. "I hate this."
"Come on guys. We have no time to waste." said Annabeth. Or did she?
"If we go on another Pegasus I will kill us all." I said grimly. I meant it. I had a sword and a simple way of using it. Slash at thing you think should cease to exist.
Annabeth and Thalia didn't hear me however. They just walked off towards the road. I followed, loosely carrying a small bag that contained some stuff we had to use. Actually it was just the traditional junk food we lived on during these quests, but what the hell.
"Taxi!" yelled Annabeth. Pity the road was deserted and we were miles from a city.
"Yes." said Alex. "Your plan for getting you there is exactly better than mine. That should tell you how bad my plan is." Oh crap.
"What was your plan?" I asked. "Throw us in the direction of the airport and hope we hit something soft?"
"No." said Alex. "We plan to let you ride this murderous griffin who loves the taste of half blood flesh. Have fun." he said and led a monstrous griffin in front of us. This was not going to end well. Unless we were stopping at a McDonalds.
"I'm so flying this." said Thalia, awe transparent in her voice. Well, I guess a Griffin did fit into the whole, heavy metal thing.
"One problem." I said. "We want to get there alive. I'm flying." I'm not repeating that Pegasus episode.
"Whatever Sea Weed brain." said Thalia. "You're still not flying the griffin." Now marvel before my brilliant debating skills.
"Not if I get on it first!" I yelled, and jumped on the griffin. Annabeth laughed and jumped on after me. "Hold on unnecessarily tightly." I said. Damn. She saw through my brilliant plan, once again. Or is that a Beatles song? Thalia grumbled and climbed on as well. "Now, let's see if I can- That's what you call a cut off. Meaning the griffin started flying towards what I hope was the Caribbean. He was slimly better than Thalia. At least he didn't seem depressed. Unfortunately he was hungry. Lets just say a golfer got an actual hole in one. In his chest. We flew over the Pacific. Or Atlantic. Or some other ocean.
"Percy are you okay?" asked Annabeth, who's hair did seem to be frizzing. Oh damn.
"I'm fine." I said. "How far are we from the Caribbean?" She didn't answer. She just shook her head and pointed at her ears. Damn wind. Before I knew it, we were in the Caribbean. See, I thought we were still in Continental Mexico. We got off shakily.
"Well, that was... fun." said Thalia. Damn. This girl has weird ways of enjoying her self.
"Right." said Annabeth, who seemed to be nauseated. Man, I didn't think the griffin was that gross.
"Be seeing you guys." said the griffin and flew away.
"He can talk?" I asked. No one answered. I hate no one. He keeps making comments about my hair.
"Do you have any idea what we're supposed to do?" asked Thalia.
"The oracle said something about a friend." said Annabeth, slowly revealing a piece of the information I've been searching for, for oh so long. "That's kinda confused me. I don't know anyone in the Caribbean. Do you?" she asked.
Thalia shook her head. I was about to shake mine when I noticed someone. "This is not colonial Australia." I said. Thalia and Annabeth stared at me. I pointed at a fishmonger. Standing next to him was Josh, in a heated debate. "I suppose he counts as a friend." I said. The afore mentioned debate was heating up.
"I will now use my amazing mental vocabulary to, to, to where the fuck am I?" asked Josh.
"For the forty seventh time!" yelled the fishmonger. "You are in Jamaica! You've been standing at that spot yelling at me for the past three hours!" yelled the fish monger. Man, he has issues.
"I demand that you give me fresh fruit, foul fruit monger!" said Josh, pointing with the finger of rudeness.
"This is a fish stall! It's the forty second time I told you that! If I see a fruit vendor now I'll beat the living shit out of them! Just leave me alone!" yelled the fish vendor.
"Look, we all have issues. But we have to work with them. So give me the fruit and I'll leave you alone." said Josh. Good to see I'm not the only one, who notices issues. Suddenly he turned to me. Our eyes met across an empty street. I hate to think of the romantic consequences.
"Ha! Ha! Tremble all ye mortals!" Yelled Josh. "My friend Percy has come to invade colonial Australia with me!"
"There goes the neighborhood." said the fish vendor irritably.
Rewiev Responses! Yay!
Hellriasers. R. Unlimited: Great ascot! Where do you get these silly notions old boy?
A great and terrible beauty: Technically that was a bridge chapter but I never say that a bridge chapter is one unless someone notices the lack of usual writing skill and I say, Oh, that was a bridge chapter.
Physco Girl: That was well ordered. Two snaps.
Firemasterytjy: I have in fact, done it again. Oops.
Rugbyking0418: Thank you. On a lighter note, the WORLD CUP STARTS THIS YEAR! Whoo! Uh, don't read that.
Author Notes: While sipping Diet Coke a strange notion has occurred to me. It concerns the matter of E-Mail. I live, well screw where I live, Lets just say I use a close to unique e-mail system. I just don't get any e-mail from The last note I got was confirmation that Fall of the Sea god was posted. So If you replied to my story idea through an e-mail, I didn't get it. Until next time. Yep. Just can't think off a good closing line.