BPOV-
Silence can be loud. I've heard that said before, but I never fully knew what it meant.
Not until I found myself sitting in the char in my family's kitchen, eyes trained on the hands folded neatly in my lap as my dad paces back and forth, and as my mom stares at me from across the room.
''How could you do this to this family, Sarah Blair,'' my dad huffs, running a hand through thinning, grey hair, ''You got kicked out of one of the best schools in all of Ohio. And for what? Smoking.''
He only calls me by my first and middle name when he's very, very angry. There have only been a handful of times, too:When I had to go to summer school for English, when I scratched his car on a mailbox while learning how to drive, and now.
At least, that's all I can think of as I await whatever comes next.
''I didn't even know you smoke. Where the hell did a sixteen-year-old girl manage to buy cigarettes?! You had the nerve to smoke them at school, too?!''
Technically, that's only half the story; Something tells me that if he knew about the bottle of Vodka and the cigarettes they found hidden under my bed, there would be more yelling.
Gratefully, mom agreed to keep that part of the conversation with my principal between the three of us.
''Dad, I'm so, so sorry.''
''Sure you are,'' he laughs bitterly ,''Do you realize we have to find another school for you to go to, right? That's your second transfer in less than two years, Sarah Blair. I had to leave work for this shit!''
I flinch as his ice cold words hit me, breaking through my skin and effectively hurting me.
Something he's never really had trouble doing.
''Just go up to your room, Sarah,'' he snaps, pointing towards the stares ,''I can't even look at you right now.''
I look towards my mother, silently begging her to defend me. In the past, she has always sat quietly as my dad hurled insult after insult after me. Especially when I came out of the closet. My dad was more concerned with what having a daughter who is a lesbian would do to his reputation among his more conservative friends.
But his daughter's opinion of him doesn't matter as much. Not at all, actually.
As soon as the front door slams shut and both of my parents' cars are pulling out of our driveway, I call the one person who is always there for me. Considering the fact that my older sister is all the way in California, and my parents are here but not really…. here… There isn't much to wonder about why I cling to someone who actually gives a shit about me.
''Hello,'' Sabrina answers the phone after the first ring.
''S-Sabrina,'' I wipe at my eyes, struggling to speak through my sobs ,''Can you come- can you come over?''
''B? Everybody heard about you getting called to the office. You okay?''
''I just…,'' I sniffle, wiping at my eyes with the back of my hand, effectively smearing my makeup even more.
I must look like a mess right now, but she won't care.
''Do you need me to bring anything? Is there anything you want to do?''
''I just… I want to forget this whole day,'' I whisper, leaning back onto my pillows and squeezing my eyes shut as if that could make me go back in time prevent my day from happening.
''I think I can make sure of that,'' she giggles, somehow seductively ,''I told the main office I had to leave early to help a friend. That it was an emergency. I'll see you in a about fifteen minutes, babe.''
With that, she hangs up, and I patiently wait for her to arrive. Right now, I just need a friend. Someone to be there for me.
And Sabrina's the only person in my life I can always count on.
DanicaPOV-
My locker slams shut, pulling me out of my thoughts.
''What the hell do you want,'' I pull my shirt on, ignoring the glare Mercedes Jones is giving me.
''Leave Kate alone,'' she states simply, folding her arms across her chest.
''We're serious. This is a warning,'' Tina Cohen-Chang speaks
''From now on,'' Rachel berry comes on my other side, ''You're going to leave her alone.''
''Look: if she wants to be gay, that's her issue,'' I roll my eyes, grabbing my bag, ''But she doesn't need to rub it in everyone's face.''
''We're not asking you, Karofsky,'' Quinn Fabray stalks towards me, eyebrow raised as if she dares me to defy her, ''Just back off, alright.''
''Don't tell me what to do,'' I push her, knocking her into Tina, who slams into the row of lockers behind her.
'Hell no!''
Santana's grabbed me by my ponytail, dragging me towards her while Quinn and Tina attempt to pull her off, and Brittany Pierce is screaming for us to ''Stop the violence!''
KatePOV-
''You guys shouldn't have done that,'' I whisper holding my binder closer to my chest as I back of the choir room, surveying the damage done to the other glee girls.
''Kate, she's bullying you,'' Quinn rolls her eyes, ''You can't handle that by yourself.''
''It's not your fight, guys,'' I groan, despite Mercedes' and Tina's protests, ''You guys shouldn't be getting hurt over something that doesn't concern you.''
Danica bullying me is one thing. She actually has an issue with me, no matter how stupid I find said issue to be. By association, she hates my friends. Now they're hurt, and it's all of my fault.
Why do I always have to mess everything up?
''Kate, you're our friend,'' Rachel pipes up, ''We're not going to sit back and let something happen to you.''
''I get it, but, please, don't ever do anything like that again. Thank you, though. I'm very appreciative of all of you. Especially you, Santana,'' I look towards the dark haired girl, who received the most injuries.
I've seen Santana fight, so it's safe to assume that she got in a few good hits as well. However, there are still scratches on her arms, and a bruise forming just below her eye.
''Oh, don't you dare get all sentimental on me, Hummel. That Danica Karosky's been begging me to kick her ass since day one,'' she turns to face me.
Despite what she wants everyone to think, Santana's not a cold, heartless person. She really cares. There's an unspoken communication between us, but there's one thing that's clear: she has my back.
Right now, I need all of the help that I can get.
''Well, well, well, if it isn't Kate Hummel. You'd better be happy you're stupid ass friends didn't get me in more trouble than they did.''
''Well, Danica,'' i begin bravely, internally cursing Azalea Adams for throwing a slushie at me and forcing me to shower at school, ''If you'd just left me alone, it wouldn't come to that.''
''Oh,'' she laughs humorlessly ,''Hummel needs her friends to stand up for her? Not so tough without them, are you?''
''Look. I know the reason you are such a bitch to me is because I'm a lesbian, and you've somehow got it into your thick skull that this automatically means I'm into you. Well guess what? You're not my type.''
''Oh, really,'' she puts a hand on her hip.
''I don't dig sweaty, egotistical girls who are never going to get out of this stupid town.''
''Don't you dare push me,'' she hisses, eyes narrowing.
''You're a sad, sad girl who can't hand the realization of just how plain she really is. You're mad because you are never going to be anything but a Lima loser, and-''
You know that feeling when you're world just stops spinning before rapidly picking up speed and then proceeding to come crashing down around you?
Yeah. That's the feeling I get when Danica Karofsky's lips are suddenly pressed to mine.
She pulls away suddenly, soft hands still cradling my face before leaning in to reconnect our lips.
I push her shoulder, and she drops her hands as if I've burned her. For a moment, we just stare at each other, neither one of us willing to make the first move.
Danica's the first to make a move, angrily slamming her hand into the locker and picking up her bag, exiting the locker room in a huff.
After regaining my balance and willing my shaking legs to move, I leave the locker room, warily searching for any signs of Danica.
''Kate?''
Embarrassingly, I let out a scream, startling both Brittany and Artie.
''Kate, are you okay,'' Brittany pouts sadly.
''I'm fine. I just… I have an upset stp,acj.''
Well, it's not a complete lie.
''Tell Mr. Schuester I won't be in for glee today. I'm going home.''
Before either one of them has a chance to reply, I turn to leave.
Am I being rude? Possibly. But I don't particularly feel like dealing with everyone asking me what's wrong. I'll already have enough on my plate hiding it from dad, Carole and Finn at dinner tonight- no pun intended.
I've gotten use to pretend it's okay. It's not that hard to put on a smile, and it's amazing what you can hide behind one. No one needs to know how bad the bullying has gotten. No one needs to know that I feel like my world is crumbling down around me.
And they definitely don't need to know the swirl of negative, extraordinarily self-deprecating thoughts that have been suffocating me lately. I'll just have to hope that things get better soon.
Even if it's getting harder and harder everyday.
Disclaimer- glee belongs to Fox and Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, and Brad Falchuk.