Hoi!

I've been gone for so long, but I'm back with another chapter. Feedback is seriously appreciated! Thanks for reading

xxx

How long had it been? One, two, three, four….yeah, four weeks and five days. Four weeks and five days since I had seem Izaya. And apparently I had been the last person to see him too.

My phone had rung earlier this morning. I had ignored it, deeming it too early to deal with any bullshit but after my phone continued to ring and ring and ring I finally picked up.

"What?" I barked down the phone.

"Shizuo, have you seen Izaya?"

"Why would I have seen him?" I sighed, rubbing my eyes and sitting up in bed.

"Well, you're always saying how you would kill him one day, I was just wondering if you had done it yet. He's been missing for weeks, see? And I've been calling him but he won't pick up. At first I thought he was just ignoring me but Celty did some snooting around and no one's seen him in ages. Namie says that he text her several weeks ago telling her that she wouldn't be needed for a while and that's the last we've heard. That kid Kida said-"

"Shinra, slow down would you. You always talk so much."

"Hey! That's so super mean! How can you say that? I'm worried about him" Shinra whined.

"Well I haven't seen him in over a month. I doubt he would leave Tokyo. He's probably on holiday" I shrugged "and if he is dead, good riddance."

"How can you-"

I hung up and chucked my phone onto my bedside table. Pumpkin hopped up onto the bed and curled up on my chest. I scratched the tiny cat's ears and tried to ignore the uneasy feeling that was forming in the pit of my stomach.

Izaya had been through a pretty traumatising ordeal and it was clear that something had been horribly wrong when he had left, which was understandable of course. However, I couldn't imagine Izaya would really know how to cope with such a thing. In his mind he was the all-knowing God of chaos. He had thought he was above normal human emotion and yet, that night had honestly terrified him. Someone had gotten to the great and mighty Izaya Orihara and had not only violated his body but had clearly fucked with his mind and soul. How would he handle learning he could be as vulnerable as the rest of us?

I look down at Pumpkin, his dark hair and rust coloured eyes reminding me of Izaya and for some reason I needed to know if he was okay.

I gently knocked him off of my chest and smiled fondly when he batted his tiny paws at my giant hand. I gave his tummy a quick scratch before getting up to get dressed. I decided not to wear my usual bartender get up, pulling on a pair of light blue jeans and a comfy baseball shirt with teal sleeves. I then went to brush my teeth, frowning when my eyes landed on my reflection. I ran my fingers through my hair, lifting my bangs to glare at the chocolate coloured roots. I was in serious need of a touch up.

I rolled up the ends of my jeans and slipped on white canvas shoes before leaving my apartment. I knew Izaya's apartment was a twenty minute walk from Shinjuku station so I figured I would be there in less than an hour. Normally I would have asked Celty for a ride but I figured it would lead to several questions that I didn't really know how to answer yet. Questions like "why do you care?"

The walk was uneventful. Less people recognised me when I wasn't dressed as a bartender. Although that isn't to say less people noticed me. I tried and failed to ignore the giggles of what seemed like half the girls I passed. I didn't like people whispering about me.

On the train I sat opposite a small group of young girls who couldn't be long out of high school. Two dark haired girls appeared to be sisters and the blonde was obviously in charge. They also whispered and giggled amongst themselves for a while before one of them got up the courage to talk "My friend thinks you're cute" the blonde pointed to another girl.

"Midori!" the smallest brunette squeaked, turning red. She was cute but was obviously way too young. She could barely pass for fifteen. "Hanako, tell her" she looked to her sister for help.

"Oh Cho, don't be so sensitive" Midori laughed before turning back to me "so? Can she give you her number?"

"I'm not into girls" I growled. Teenage girls were so annoying.

"Oh…you were right, Hanako. He's way too cute to be straight" Midori said.

Hanako just shrugged.

"Excuse me?!" I choked on air. I had meant it when I said I wasn't into girls but I definitely wasn't into guys either. I just wasn't into people like that. I wouldn't even allow myself to think about things in that kind of way. The conversation had come up with Tom once and I had explained that I wasn't attracted to anyone. Everyone annoyed me, almost to the point of repulsion and there was no way I could stomach getting intimate with them. And if I did find someone that I actually liked I wouldn't risk hurting them by having sex with them. So after a quick google search we decided I was demisexual.

I was relieved to escape, as it was becoming harder and harder not to kill that Midori girl. I quickly got off the train and almost ran from the station, heading for Izaya's apartment complex. It was a little weird that I knew his address but it really had been by accident. Shinra had been going on about it to Celty and it just kind of sunk in. It was proving useful but still.

"Hey, do you know what floor Izaya Orihara lives at?" I asked the doorman.

"Are you a friend of Mr Orihara?"

"…Sure."

He narrowed his eyes "Sir, you will need to sign in at the front desk."

"You still haven't answered my question" I used my most dangerous voice. This guy had no idea who he was dealing with.

He took a small step back "Top floor."

I stepped around him without saying thanks. He had kept me waiting after all. I also ignored the front desk, heading straight for the elevator and slamming my finger repeatedly on the 'up' button. As I waited for the lift I glanced around the lobby. This place was definitely fancier than his last residence. I wondered how much he was paying…

The lift arrived and I was not happy to see one of those suited men than stood in the lift. I had no idea what the official name was and what they were actually there to do, all I knew was that they were annoying and awkward and that I hated them. I shot the chubby man a dirty look as I entered.

"What floor, sir?"

I ignored him and jabbed the button myself. Is that all they did? How lazy were people these days?

"A friend of Mr Orihara?"

I started grinding my teeth "Yes."

"Wow you're tall! I've never seen hair like yours before!"

'Don't hit him. Don't hit him. Don't hit him. Don't- …Dammit Shizuo, you hit him' I thought. We reached my floor and I stepped over the lump of a man who now lay in a bundle on the floor.

Apartment 32A. I knocked. No answer. I knocked again. Still no answer. I kicked down the door.

Izaya stood of the far side of the room; his eyes wide, knife in his trembling hands. He looked a total mess with puffy, sleep deprived eyes and wild hair. His knees were shaking and he had definitely lost a little weight. He was a mess. A total contrast to the well-kept, arrogant flea who had been fearlessly harassing me only a month and a few weeks ago. Something was very wrong.

"Shizuo" he squeaked, remaining in the corner but lowering his blade.

"Izaya?"

"You…I wasn't expecting…" he trailed off, glancing nervously to the broken door.

"I'll fix it, hang on" I went back and pushed the door back into place. I also kicked of my shoes while I was there. "Where the hell have you been? Shinra has been freaking out. I told him you were fine, but obviously you're not. Izaya, have you spoken to anyone about what happened? You were almost-"

"I'm fine. What do you care?" he snapped.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead "I really don't know, but after seeing you like that I'm finding it hard to hate you right now. I think we should tell Shinra, he'll know how to help."

Izaya looked away "Shizuo, you don't seem to understand how humiliating this all is. I'm embarrassed, I'm scared, I'm confused and the water isn't hot enough to wash away this shame. I'm dirty." I watched as he tossed the knife and plopped down on the couch, pulling his knees to his chest. He rubbed his eyes "I can't sleep. I've never been so on edge."

I took a deep breath, not believing what I was about to say "Look, how about I stay for a while?"

Izaya looked blank.

"You can sleep for a bit. I'll…I'll protect you" I blushed.

There was a long and semi-awkward pause before he spoke "Why would you do that?"

"Like I said," I mumbled, shuffling my feet "I can't hate you right now."

Izaya groaned and covered his face with his hands "This is so fucking insane! I can tell you aren't lying either."

…

"Fine," he threw his hands up in defeat "you can stay. Make yourself comfy I guess."

"Thanks" I sat next to him.

"You can watch TV or whatever…you'll wake me up before you go, right? I don't want to wake up alone" he confessed, blushing.

I sighed and pulled him down so his head was resting on my lap "I'm not going anywhere." I stared into those rust coloured eyes, trying to convey how serious I was. They gazed back up at me…had they always been so big and sparkly? He looked totally confused…It was a kind of cute actually…wait. What?!

I turned away but began to rake my fingers through his dark hair. I felt him relax a little more with each stroke. It was a tad surprising to find that the flea liked to be petted but I said nothing and continued the motion even when he had fallen asleep.

I woke up with a slight pang of panic. It took me a while to remember where I was and who I was with. Falling asleep in my enemy's presence didn't seem like the brightest of ideas but a quick glance down confirmed my safety. The white light from the static on the TV lit up Izaya's sleeping face. He looked really peaceful. His eyes moved under his eyelids as he dreamt, but the small upturn in the corners of his mouth told me it wasn't a nightmare.

I found my hand, gently caressing the side of his face with more grace than I thought I could manage. I don't know what was different by he looked incredibly beautiful tonight, with long lashes fluttering against his porcelain cheeks. My gaze landed on pretty pink lips, which were slightly parted. I found myself staring and for some alien reason, I wanted to know what they tasted like. I bet it tasted sweet.

Izaya made a soft moaning noise and shifted his weight a bit. His eyes slowly fluttered open and he looked up at me with sleepy eyes. He softly giggled "You stayed."

"I said I would" I said, leaning back a bit, realising my face was closer to his than it should have been.

"I'm glad. It's weird but I feel safe with you…maybe there are monsters out there that are worse than you" he sighed, nuzzling into me and closing his eyes.

He was clearly still half asleep so I didn't take it too personally and judging by the gentle way he had said it, he had meant it as a compliment "Thanks."

"Can you brush my hair again, Shizu-chan?" he yawned.

I chuckled. That had been kind of sweet. "Sure" I tangled my fingers into his hair and began the soothing motion again "are you going back to sleep?"

"Nuh uh. This feels nice, I want to enjoy it" he reopened his copper eyes, to meet my chocolate ones. He grinned.

I stuck my finger in his ear causing him to squeal and squirm "don't be a brat."

He giggled again "but you think this feels nice too, don't you?"

I coughed "Well I suppose it does, yeah."

He smiled contently, glad I had confessed "Just for tonight."

"Just for tonight" I repeated.

"I like your outfit by the way" Izaya changed the subject, tugging at my teal and white baseball tee.

"Thanks. I wish I could say that to you too but those sweatpants are really not your thing."

Izaya laughed and lifted his hips, and wriggling out of them. He was left in nothing but dark boxers that hung from his slender hips and a grey shirt that was several sizes too big. I looked back and forth between the shorts and the shirt and realised both belonged to me.

He laughed even harder "Don't look so scandalised, they're comfy."

I hated to admit it but there was something incredibly sexy about how he looked in my clothing. The shorts rode up and revealed his milky thighs and the t-shirt had slipped down his arm, shoving off a pale shoulder. It was pretty hot.

I shifted my weight, feeling a blush spreading over my cheeks. I don't know where all these thoughts were coming from. To come here to check up on him was one thing but to want to kiss him…that crossed some line. Hadn't I just decided I was demisexual? That meant sexual feelings only developed after strong, romantic bonds were formed and there was definitely none of that between me and him. But I suppose saving someone from rape would probably have an effect on any relationship.

"Shizuo?"

"Huh?"

"You sort of spaced out for a second there. Are you okay?" he sounded genuinely concerned.

"I'm good. Although, I kind of need to pee and stretch my legs a bit. Do you mind?"

He sat up "Bathroom's through there" he pointed.

"Thanks."

I fought the urge to take a peek in Izaya's bathroom cupboards even though I was kind of curious to know, even if the knowledge wouldn't serve much of a purpose. It was just fun. Me and Shinra started doing it as teenagers and always got a laugh out of it.

I did look at the bathroom products he was using and found that they were all girly brands, many of them coconut scented.

I splashed some water in my face before leaving hoping that it would somehow clear me of these strange, fluffy thoughts. Just for tonight. After that we would hate each other again.

I found Izaya exactly where I had left him "It's getting late. Do you want me to-"

"Stay."

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. So I just nodded.

He crawled onto my lap and wrapped his arms around my neck "Shizu-chan is surprisingly comfy."

I hooked my arm around his waist and held him close "I'll saty, but I should call Shinra and tell him you're okay."

Izaya snorted "I don't get him, we're not even that close."

I shrugged "he's annoying but I kind of love him."

Izaya cocked his head but said nothing. He watched as I pulled out my mobile and called the underground surgeon.

"Shizuo! What's up?"

I rolled my eyes at his oh so perky tone "I just thought I'd let you know that the flea is fine." Izaya pinched my cheek as a warning. I silently chuckled and gave him a light jab in the ribs. He gasped.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"…how do you know he's fine?" Shinra asked.

"I bumped into him in Shinjuku. He got away pretty quickly and said he didn't have the time to fight or something. I chased him for a bit but I had other stuff going on."

"What were you doing in Shinjuku?"

"Meeting someone. I have other friends, you know" I snapped.

"Oh? Is it a girl? I bet it is! Who is she?" Shinra practically squealed down the phone.

"No it's not a girl."

"Aw Baby, come back to bed. Who you talking to? Not another girl I hope" Izaya said in an unbelievably realistic female voice. I glared.

"Argh!" Shinra gasped "I knew it! Hey Celty, Shizuo has a girlfriend. I told you he wasn't gay…Huh? Yes you did! You totally said so the other day…"

"Why does everyone think I'm gay?!" I groaned.

"I didn't think so…Celty says I was the only one. After Erika mentioned you and Izaya being an item it just got everyone thinking. Everyone agrees that you with Izaya was absurd but as for you being a homosexual? Well people seemed to think that was feasible. It wasn't just you, Izaya too."

"Well thanks for that guys" I snorted "I can't imagine Izaya's gay…" I drifted off, noticing the look Izaya was giving me. "Anyway, I've got to go. Talk to you later."

"Wait! I have questions about-"

I hung up on him.

"I heard that you weren't attracted to anyone. That you were above it" I said, finding this way more interesting than I should have.

"I'm above mindlessly fucking" he exhaled impatiently "Is it so terrible that I want something more than that?"

"What do you mean?"

Izaya pouted "Everyone seems to think I'm some mega slut who's whoring myself out for information. Well, I'm not. I know I'm not exactly easy and decided a long time ago that if someone did somehow fall in love with me I would want to give them everything."

"You're a virgin?"

"Yes, so what?"

"I, well, nothing. Me too."

…

"Shut up are you!" he poked me. Hard.

I smacked his hand away "I am. People annoy the crap out of me for the most part and I don't really want to hurt the ones that don't."

"But you're so…" he shook his head "I doubt you'd hurt someone."

"Bullshit. I don't exactly do gentle, do I?" I spat bitterly.

He shrugged "I hear some people like it rough. Look for a really kinky girl."

I laughed and repositioned myself so I was able to fall back, Izaya still on my chest. He looked at me with big shiny eyes and reminded me of Pumpkin from earlier this morning.

Izaya tilted his head "you're good looking when you smile. You should do it more."

"You're half the reason I don't smile."

"Ouch, Shizuo! And here we were having a moment and you go and ruin it by saying something as cruel as that" he whined.

"Ah, so we were having a moment, were we?" I teased.

He placed a small butterfly kiss on my nose "I don't know. Maybe."

Soooo Yeah! Again, thanks so so much for reading! Urgh, I haven't watched Durarara in forever! Is it true they're doing a second season? That would be amazing! xxx

Until next time, my fine friends of fury!