A/N: I wrote this for months, like, one para every week. Yes. I'm crazy. Sorry if this lacks continuity bcoz, I seriously wrote them at different times orz. One of the reason is becoz I've been writing this in the middle of my work orz. I would be damn if I delay updating more so I settle with this. I'm sorry for the bad and late update. Life sucks.

Chapter 10

The tense atmosphere surrounding them felt like eternity. For a few seconds, Erza thought no one else existed in that small world of theirs. She could feel something fluttering inside her chest. She never thought Gray would ever give her this effect—not even close to it. She almost forgot to breathe.

Memories of a certain mage struggled to be noticed through the thick fog of emotion. Navy hair. Deep eyes. Strong arms. Unique tattoo. A comforting gentle and warm gaze he casted upon her during the velvety red of the beautiful sunset. Red—Scarlet.

Jellal.

Instinctively Erza reached back, pushing Gray's naked chest away from her to get herself some personal space. Her eyes unexpectedly widened, breathing steadily as if trying to regain herself.

Gray stumbled backwards at the force, balancing himself a few feet away from her as he looked up again.

"Get out of here," her voice was low—and demanding. But Gray could sense a tinge of uncertainty in her wavering voice.

"Erza—"

"Get out!" she mustered a firmer voice.

Gray wasn't affected by the intensity of her voice though. She was trying her best to look fierce, but she looked frail in Gray's eyes nonetheless.

"Fine, I'll go," Gray nodded slightly, straightening himself up. "But you're not going on any mission with that condition." He said with such finality that Erza was left speechless, and he stepped out of the library.

Unconsciously Erza placed a palm on the lower part of her tummy. A soft sigh escaped her lips when she finally was left alone. She felt her eyes stinging with unshed tears, and her heart drumming on her rib cage.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" she whispered, almost regretting what she felt a few moments ago. She almost gave in to him.

Almost.

Jellal placed some firewood at the side of the campfire, trying to keep the flame alive for the night. He eyes flickered to the angry burning red, dancing to the night breeze—as angry as the flames in his heart.

He hated this feeling. Years ago, this was exactly what he felt when the darkness enveloped him in a life of destruction. He ruined a lot of things—irreversibly. He never blamed Ultear about it. It wasn't her fault. He was driven by a childish ego stemmed by sheer hatred to the injustice of this transient world. He wasn't strong enough—emotionally.

He wondered if Erza understood when he told her that. He wasn't strong enough. It wasn't all about physical strength. It was about his inner strength. He had envied Fairy Tail wizards about this. They might not come from a strong background—Jellal knew most of them did not walk on a red carpet of life—but they were strong; much stronger than he could ever be. The strength that accumulated through the bond they shared together with comrades somehow shone so bright; maybe too bright for his bare eyes. They looked so beautiful.

Comrades. Jellal's eyes instinctively shifted towards the sleeping Meredy in the sleeping bag near the campfire.

He knew he had developed a strong bond with Ultear and Meredy. And he missed Ultear so much. But this was their fate—the price they had to pay for their sins. And he knew he had no right to defy it. But how could life blame him for this? After all, he is just a human—with emotions. He wasn't a doll who wouldn't mind being played with. He couldn't lie how broken he was when they lost Ultear—and when he lost Erza. He couldn't.

And he felt a fresh tear running down his cheek. He blinked, wiping it away with his sleeve.

"What the—" he muttered, chuckling slightly. Meredy was still sleeping, the bundle raising and falling steadily with her breath. It was probably one of the most beautiful sight for him now—the sight of his important person breathing to live.

He never thought losing an important person would hurt this much. And suddenly he felt as if he couldn't imagine what Erza had been through—the whole scheme he had put her through in the past. Jellal had never curse since he regained his memory. But for now, he'd make an exception.

It fucking hurts.

And he wouldn't want to put her through those ever again.

"Natsu, Happy and I are going later on the evening," Lucy slid on the stool next to Erza.

Erza tilted her head, meeting the eyes of her blonde teammate.

"Would you be okay by your own?" she could see the concern in Lucy's eyes.

"Why wouldn't I be?" she asked back, chuckling a bit, not wanting to sound intimidating.

"Well, it's okay if you would, then," Lucy fidgeted a bit in her seat then carefully slid off the stool, watching Erza tentatively before shifting towards Natsu. Her worried look did not go unnoticed by the scarlet haired mage.

Erza sighed. Truthfully, she still felt exhausted. She wondered how the hell Bisca could go through the whole pregnancy. She was still in the first trimester and it felt horrible already. She felt like drinking herself out.

"Mira, get me some—" she called out to the barmaid, but paused as she contemplated her choice before letting it out in a heave. "Just get me some juice."

Mirajane gave her a soft smile as she pull out a bottle of orange juice from the watched as the barmaid returned with a glass of orange juice, trying to decipher the supposed to be a smile on her lips.

"Why are you smirking?" Erza pulled the glass closer to her.

"I'm not," Mirajane denied defensively.

Erza contemplated for a while before sipping her glass.

"When is your due?" Mirajane asked in a sudden, and Erza choked on her drink. A warm blush immediately crept on her cheeks. It felt so different to have someone ask her something like that.

"I..." she stuttered. "I don't know."

"You don't?" Mirajane blinked. "You haven't properly check your pregnancy haven't you?"

Erza tentatively shook her head.

"Explains why Lucy worries about you," Mirajane's face dropped slightly, frowning in concern.

"None of it matters. This little shit of drama will end soon," Erza muttered under her breath.

"It will once you get over your denial," Mirajane nodded slightly.

At that very instant, Erza shot the barmaid a sharp glare. One which always made their guildmates flinch in horror. Mirajane didn't though. She could act like she was scared anytime before, but she knew she wasn't. And right here, right now, she wasn't kidding. Her eyes bore firmly into the knight's, letting Erza know that she was damn serious about this.

Knowing that their resident demon take-over mage wasn't going to back down this time, Erza let out a strong huff, pushing away her half drank glass as she pivoted her heels to leave.

"I have never gone against your decision before, Erza," Mirajane said before Erza could step further. "But this time, you're clearly not in tune with yourself."

Erza left anyway.

The tresses of scarlet hair of the infamous Fairy Tail Titania seemed to sway gracefully as she landed her feet onto the cold ground. Panting, she unquipped her Heaven Wheel Armor back into her usual Heart Kreuz one. Some trees around her were seen slashed into half, some were just with minor scratches. She had wanted to let it out for quite some time now. And the forest at the outskirt of Magnolia seemed to be the only place to—now since she wasn't allowed to go on a badass mission anyway. She grunted. If only she wasn't all the type who would abide to the rules, she could have gone by herself. But it would give a bad example to her guildmates. She's an S-class mage. She can't just jump into a mission without permission.

"That was a pretty hard hit."

Erza whipped at the sudden greeting, eyes glaring intensely. She wasn't exactly up for a guest. Not in her current mood. But just as her eyes caught the glimpse of the azure haired man, her eyes softened in seconds.

"Jellal, what are you doing here?" Erza's voice wavered.

"Just passing by," Jellal wondered if Erza could hear through his lies. She always could after all. A pang of guilt surged into his heart. How many times he had lied to this woman? The tradition never stopped. Even after he gained his senses, he just had to lie about his non-existant fiancé, and up until now too.

There was an uncomfortable silence breaking between them, and Erza shifted ever so slightly as her eyes ran across the contour of the ground.

"You don't look like yourself," it was Jellal who broke the awkward silence.

"Wha—"

"There is no need to lash your anger on these innocent trees, Erza. No one blamed you on this."

"I'm not angry!" Erza protested. But her expression died at the reproachful look from the wanted criminal.

"I..." she stuttered. "It was an accident."

Jellal stared at her, attempting to explain herself. And Erza shifted again, feeling the burden of his eyes weighting on her shoulders.

"I never wanted it to happen. All these years, it had always been you. I..."

"Your soul is in chaos," Jellal interrupted. She was going everywhere, and she didn't make any sense at all to him anymore. It seemed as if the Erza who had slapped him awake had far gone. "Don't you think you need a little rest? You need to clear your mind about this sudden event."

Erza swallowed the lump in her throat, her mind processing Jellal's suggestion as she nodded slightly. "Maybe you're right." After all, Jellal was probably still the only person who managed to calm her down and put her back to senses.

Pulling up his hoodie, Jellal gestured her forward. "I'll walk you home."

Gray slumped himself on the bar stool, grunting as he cradled his chin in his palm. He wouldn't want to admit he was sulking, so he attempted to smile and comment occasionally at the quarrelling Jet and Droy besides him. He wouldn't sulk. No, he wouldn't. Even if he saw Erza with Jellal at the forest together—no, he wouldn't. He was too busy fighting his inner pride. He didn't notice how his chest rumbled in a low growl, catching the attention of their barmaid.

"You should go on a mission for a while," Mirajane suggested.

"Maybe later," he nodded, taking a swig of his beer. He stared down to foamy substances in his mug before a curiosity struck over him. "Mira, does all pregnant woman easily feel fatigue?"

Mirajane paused her work at the sudden question, pondering a bit about her experience taking care of some elder guild mates who had been pregnant before. "I'm not sure, but they're all different from each other. When Macao's wife was pregnant of Romeo, she didn't feel sick at all. She was perfectly healthy. But Bisca said when she was pregnant, she was throwing up almost the whole day. It wasn't morning sickness for her anymore. It was full day sickness already."

Gray almost couldn't imagine that. Will he see Erza being all tired for the rest of her pregnancy? "How long did the sickness last?"

Mirajane pursed her lips a bit, trying to dig the memory of what Bisca had told her. "Bisca told me it lasted for about five months, and then it gradually lessened but she still feels a little nauseous."

Gray cringed visibly. Does that means her hormones won't be normal for five freaking months? "Isn't there any cure?"

"Give some medicine to prevent vomiting?" it was a mere guess from Mirajane, but Gray's face contorted in disbelief.

"But Erza doesn't vomit!" he groaned.

"Then, vitamins?"

Erza opened her eyes slowly. The twilight rays fanned across her face as the gentle breeze waved her curtains softly. She sighed, still feeling a little tired. She had been sleeping since Jellal sent her home, and she still felt a little sore over the back of her shoulders. She probably should really start giving some real rest to her body. She had been forcing and restraining herself too much due to the constant stress. Erza lazily picked herself up, washing her face just to freshen up when she heard a soft knock on the door of her room. She went to open the door just to be greeted by the familiar silver haired barmaid.

"What were you up to?" Mirajane asked politely.

"Nothing," Erza walked back into her room, leaving the door open. She really didn't have the mood to be nice.

"Gray gave you this."

Erza paused, turning back to her longtime friend who had put out a small paper bag towards her. "What's that?"

"It's some kind of pregnancy pills. It would help giving you more energy," Mirajane added, pushing the bag slightly into Erza's hand when she was sure the Titania wasn't going to take it herself.

"I'm not weak."

"No one says you are," Mirajane cut her off. "But all pregnant ladies have to take this, and you are definitely one."

Scrunching her face rebelliously, Erza huffed harshly but took in the bag anyway. Mirajane chuckled at her.

"Make sure to take it once a day."

Erza groaned. Something in Mirajane's tone sounded full with certainty. As if the barmaid knew she'll take it anyway. Erza places a hand on thelower part of her abdomen. She hadn't felt sick. But she felt extremely uncomfortable.

The following morning, Erza knocked on Wendy's door early in the morning. Wendy was probably just finished her shower, judging by the dampness of her hair. Erza gave the younger a soft smile.

"Erza-san?"

"I was wondering if you could check my—" she paused, voice lowering a few octaves. "Pregnancy."

Wendy blinked, looking at the scarlet haired lady in anticipation. Her eyes glittered in partly veiled relief. "Of course! But I'm not an expert in this. It's much better if you get Porlyusica-san to examine you."

Erza really didn't want to get that old lady involved. Right now, she's not yet comfortable about letting the public know regarding this matter. She had to consult the master first eventually—but not now. She needed more time. Just a little bit more. After all, she wasn't sure about herself anymore—let alone the baby.

"No, maybe you can just check me up," she insisted.

Wendy's smile hadn't died. She opened her door wide, motioning Erza to get in. She didn't know all that much, but she can do some basic checkups at least.

Erza groaned, tossing herself around her bed with a deep frown on her face. It had been three days since Wendy checked her, and she had been fucking obedient in taking Gray's supplement every day. But she still felt so fucking awful. In fact, she probably felt worse. She would have to go to the toilet often whenever she eats, even though strangely she didn't vomit. But she felt tired still. She hugged a pillow, clutching the soft fabric to her chest.

"Are you sure you're not going to Porlyusica-san?" Wendy asked, concern etched deeply on her face.

"You said I'm okay."

"I know, but like I said, I'm not an expert in stuff like this," Wendy reiterated. "I can't seem to get what's the problem but I still think it's not normal for you to suffer like this, Erza-san."

"I'll be fine," Erza reached the supplement bottle on her bedside table, taking out one pill. She'll be fine eventually. She had been resting for the whole three days. She'll be fine.

A/N: I always believe that when a writer is done writing, the writer's thought died, and the reader's thought starts to live. That's why I usually dislike explaining the scenes I wrote. I know some of you are wary with the abortion issue, but I already have plans for the baby and I cannot change the whole plot now, so I'm sorry if it's not to your liking. I still, however, would not explain it to you, or any hidden messages. Because I believe people's thoughts are driven by how they think/view things—that is why writing, reading and reviewing are fun. I don't want you to think like I do—I want you to think as who you are, and tell me what you see; show me your world. I'd happily accept all criticisms from you, and I wouldn't mind if you don't like it, and really, you can tell me about it. I'm not the close minded writer who would get mad because people dislike my writing. I just want to know how people view this, and I can improve myself by understanding your thinking too. Thanks for those who reviewed and let me know your thinking in the previous chapter too; TheDelta724, VK, TheShipWeirdo, Careenz, scarletmage, Raikiri80, amnaK96, starymoon, sassywriterchick, matsuky1407, Shiranai Atsune and the unnamed Guest.