Chapter Seventeen:

Robin woke up and stretched before the pain shot through her body and she remembered her leg injury. She blinked and looked around, not seeing Patrick. She thought he was here, at least when she fell asleep.

He had been so sweet to her, taking care of her and helping her. It was rare for her to allow anyone to help her and she found herself really enjoying his company.

She stood up and promptly fell to the floor, crying out in pain. Her chest hurt and she could feel the blood pounding in her ears.

"Robin?" Patrick rushed into the room and saw her on the floor. "What happened?"

She didn't say anything for a minute, as she was trying to breathe through the immense pain.

"Hey," he knelt down next to her and she sat back and closed her eyes.

"Robin? You're scaring me," he said softly. "I need to know if I should call an ambulance."

"No, I'm just in some pain," she said haltingly. "I need a minute."

He saw her leg was twisted and he knew that needed to be fixed.

"Let me pick you up because your leg is twisted."

She didn't say anything and her tears spilled over her cheeks.

He gently gathered her in his arms and she cried out as he picked her up and placed her on the bed. He held her face in his hands and stroked her cheeks.

"Hey, look at me and breathe slowly. It's okay," he said soothingly. She was pale and he was worried.

"I'm okay," she said brokenly. "I don't know what happened. That hurt like a bitch."

He smiled and she wiped her eyes.

"I'm sorry I left you alone. I was looking to make something for dinner, but then I heard you. I shouldn't have left the room."

"No, it's okay," she said and sniffed. "You don't need to be with me all the time."

"I know, but still," he said. "How did you fall?"

"I went to get up and go to the bathroom and I just collapsed. I thought I could walk slowly, but I went down like a ton of bricks. It really scared me."

"Well, the artery was cut, Robin. You lost a large amount of blood and had a transfusion. Your leg has to take time and recover and the strength will come back with time."

She felt her chin quiver and she nodded.

He tilted her chin up to him and he smiled at her.

"I wouldn't lie to you. You were really lucky. That guy could have killed you."

"I know," she said quietly.

He was quiet and then he looked at his hands.

"I would have been really upset if that happened."

"You would?"

"I would. I've grown quite fond of you," he smiled.

"You have?"

"I have."

"Why?"

He was startled by the question.

"What do you mean? Because we're friends and I don't really have any of those."

"Oh, well I guess then it's good I didn't die."

He stood up and paced.

"This conversation is weird."

She nodded and felt funny. He seemed far away and her limbs felt heavy.

"Patrick?" she said softly.

He saw she was suddenly really pale.

"I'm here, what is it?"

"Something is wrong. I can't breathe," she said and passed out.

"Shit!" he dialed 911 and relayed information before he tried to assess what he could. He worried she had a blood clot and if that was the case, every second counted.

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Maxie ran into the waiting room and up to Patrick. She was frantic and got right in his face.

"Where is she? What happened? I thought you were taking care of her? Aren't you a doctor? What's going on?"

Patrick glared at her and stepped back.

"She's having a cardiac catheterization to remove a blood clot that's close to her heart."

"What?" Maxie's voice reached a decibel Patrick thought only dogs could hear. "She was shot in the leg and she said she would be okay. What happened to her heart?"

"It was a complication from the surgery. It happens."

"It happens? That's what you have to say?"

Patrick had enough of this woman.

"Can you back off me? I don't need to hear your screeching."

He wondered if her head was going to pop off.

"You don't need to hear me? Well it's good to know this is all about you. Robin is my family and I may not be so smart and calm but she's everything to me and now she is having something put into her heart and you care that I'm upset? Well screw you."

Patrick sighed and put his hands up.

"Okay, I'm sorry. They aren't putting anything in her heart. They are threading a catheter through her femoral artery and inserting a stent into the area by the clot to open it up."

Maxie blinked and Patrick smiled.

"They are going to fix her."

"Okay," Maxie said and turned when Dante and Lulu came in. She raced over to them and Patrick sat back down.

He was going out of his mind with worry. He did this. He missed it and he should have known. He went into the fucking kitchen to make dinner when she was struggling. She was in so much pain when she fell and that wasn't normal.

What if she died? What if that was the last moment he would get to spend with her? What if he never told her how he felt about her?

He went over his ridiculous answer to her question about why he cared. Because he didn't have any friends? What the hell kind of answer was that? He had friends, sort of. What he felt for her wasn't friendship. He felt so much more.

He felt his eyes fill with tears as the reality came crushing down on him.

Her HIV didn't matter. His HIV didn't matter. What mattered was her. What mattered was how she made him feel. What mattered was making her happy and seeing her smile. She was the most amazing woman and he had been an idiot. He needed another chance. He had to let her know that she mattered. It wasn't because she was his friend. It was because he cared about her, deeply.

It was because she was Robin.

He looked up as the doctor came out and Patrick felt his heart drop. He knew that look. He went to go to him when the doctor took Maxie and Dante and Lulu into a room and closed the door, effectively shutting him out.

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Chapter Eighteen:

Patrick knocked on the door to the conference room and waited. Lulu opened it and stared at him.

"We are having a private meeting," she said, not knowing who Patrick was.

"I am a friend of Robin's and I want to know how she is," he said.

Dante looked over and smiled at him.

"Hi Patrick, come in."

Lulu smiled at him and moved for him to enter.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to know if Robin was okay and if I could see her."

The doctor looked at Maxie and stood up.

"I'll leave that up to you," he looked at Dante and nodded before he walked out.

"Is she okay?"

"They had some trouble regulating her pressure during the cath, but it was a success. There was a large clot that was very close to her heart. If you hadn't got her hear when you did, she would have died. She needs to lie flat for a few more hours and then will be moved into a room for the night. She is sedated, but awake," Dante said.

"Can I see her?"

Maxie stood up and looked at Dante.

"Is this going to make her develop AIDS? Is this the beginning of her getting worse? What am I going to do?"

Lulu walked to Maxie and put her arm around her.

"No, Maxie. Robin will get better. I know her values haven't been great, but we just need to find a better cocktail. This shouldn't have anything to do with that. Please try not to worry."

Patrick felt sick. This could absolutely cause her body to turn on itself. He had been so blind to everything but his own pain.

"Please. Can I see her?"

Dante looked at Maxie and then nodded.

"She's in the cath lab recovery. She has to remain there for a few hours. You can sit with her."

Patrick nodded.

"Thank you."

He walked out and headed to the room.

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She was scared. There was no denying it. Lying there, alone in the room with machines beeping and nurses walking in and out was making her feel infinitely small.

The blood clot was inches away from ending her life. It wasn't HIV or AIDS or anything she could have foreseen. Some scared father came into her office shooting and it had almost been over.

She was beginning to panic. She couldn't move and there was something heavy on her groin. She hated being alone. She hated this.

"Help! Please help me," she cried out and realized her voice was weak and raspy.

"Robin?" Patrick walked in and heard something. He went to the bed and she looked up at him, her tears spilling over her cheeks. "Hey, what is it? Are you in pain?"

"Patrick? She said softly. "I'm so glad you're here."

He smiled and reached for a tissue to wipe her tears.

"You are?" he said as he sat down.

"I really am," she said and her chin quivered.

"What's making you cry? What's wrong?"

She took a deep breath and tried to move, but couldn't.

"You have to lie still for a few hours. Your femoral artery needs to heal."

Understanding washed over her face at his words and she nodded.

"Okay."

He stroked her cheek and her tears came again. It broke his heart to see her so upset.

"Robin, please tell me why you're crying."

"I'm okay. I think I'm just having a little panic attack. I woke up and was all alone and my mind was racing," she blinked and looked at him. "I really don't like to be alone."

He took her hand in his and kissed her fingers.

"Then you won't be."

"I didn't mean it like that. I can imagine you have other things to do."

"Actually, when I looked at my calendar, it said that I was meant to sit with a beautiful woman who didn't like to be alone."

She rolled her eyes and he grinned.

"Too much?"

"Maybe just a little," she said and laughed a little.

He was quiet for a minute and she sniffed.

"Patrick, I need to thank you."

He was surprised.

"For what?"

"If you hadn't been there, I would have died. I don't think I can ever repay you for that."

He was choked up when he reached to smooth her hair back.

"I should have noticed the signs sooner. You were in such pain and I should have known. I'm sorry."

"No, it happened so fast. You were amazing. Thank you."

He shrugged.

"Let's just agree to disagree."

"It's okay to admit you're wrong," she said with a teasing look.

"Is that right?"

"Yes. I can see you have a lot to learn."

He laughed and she started to fight back her tears again.

"Hey, it's okay," he said again. There was something about seeing her cry that gutted him.

"You should go. I'm so embarrassed to be carrying on like this. I just hate being here. I hate that I'm sick and I'm scared. I don't mean for you to have to baby sit me."

"Robin, listen to me for a minute. I want to be here. I want to be with you. I want to help you and I want you to want me here, too."

She looked into his eyes and saw his vulnerability.

"I guess I don't understand why."

He exhaled and wiped his own eyes.

"Because I feel something powerful for you. I don't know when it happened or how it happened, but I don't want to walk away. I need you because I simply like myself a lot more when I'm with you."

Her hand moved to his cheek and she cupped his face in her hand.

"I need you, too," she said and he leaned in to brush his lips over hers. He pressed his mouth to hers and kissed her softly.

"Will you stay for a little while?"

He rubbed her hand and nodded.

"I'm not going anywhere."

She closed her eyes and he watched her. He wondered why her viral load was unstable and how much she was truly going through. He realized he wanted to know it all and he couldn't wait.

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