DISCLAIMER: Many of the characters and situations described in the following fic are owned entirely by Takahashi Rumiko, a woman I have the greatest respect and admiration for. (In fact if she were willing, I would have her love child. A neat trick since I am a male kinda guy and not built to bear children.) Her creativity has even inspired the creation of a whole new branch of the Trek Universe. Therefore, any mentions of historical moment from Trek, Trek-Tech and characters and ships, which I shall endeavor to keep at a minimum, is entirely intentional. Within this story are characters who are from the Trek Universe, but not of Trek. These are my creations. All other characters that are integral to this story are her property, apart from the characters from AMG. This is a work intended to share a concept, and perhaps my story telling abilities. There is no money to be earned by me or by anyone else from this work. I might also add, Paladin, Team Paladin, the Starship Percheron and her crew, and Miss Kitty as she is here, ARE my property, and not to be used with out express consent from myself. I have worked hard to develop these characters and hope to use them in published works eventually. I choose to share them and their attitudes with you here. The character from OH! My Goddess belong to who ever owns them… sorry but my copies of this series (as well as Ranma ½) mysteriously disappeared during a move

I would also like to add the following. NO the character of Jerrod Randolph Macon, A.K.A. Paladin is in no way related to T.N.G.'s Silver Paladin. That character was little more than a pirate, my character is intended to embody the true spirit of the word paladin.

Also, for the Trek nitpickers out there. I'm sorry to rain on your parade, but. There is no such thing as a society that doesn't use some form of currency. Roddenberry's vision of the future is a wonderful vision, but impractical as far as money is concerned. It is a socialist utopia, and it cannot work. Any historian or economist can tell you that. Even the most primitive cultures on the planet barter with each other for goods and services, and that is the earliest form of currency. Let's face it, even the People's Republics around the world, (Read as oppressive communist governments, where if you speak out against anything, you wind up run over by a tank.) Even they have currencies that the civilian public uses for internal trade. It has been postulated that the Federation has solved the issues of limited resources thereby removing the need for any form of currency. I disagree with this. Not that the resource problem has been addressed, but that currency will be done away with.

In the Federation future, most of the actual trade where currency is used to make a purchase will be of the 'intellectual properties exchange' forum. The reason why currency will always exist is because of the inherent need of humans for an incentive to improve. It wouldn't be worth your time to be a clothing designer or civilian engineer if you weren't given concrete evidence of your value. Payment of some form of currency will be much easier to keep track of fifteen hundred credits than twenty goats and fifteen sheep and three chickens from the buyer in China who really loved the new spaghetti strap, plunging to the ankles neckline evening gown.

Capitalism may not be perfect, but it's better than anything else around is right now.

Most likely the currency used in the world of Trek is closely related to various forms used in much of Sci-Fi, a credit system, there may be no hard currency, but there is a form of monetary exchange.

Internally to this story, there are some glaring examples, (to some) of extreme OOC, as well as outright character revision. As this is intended to be an original telling with some new characters with a minor twist here and there to aid in making the whole thing insensible… inchoate? …to the world of Rumiko's vision. There has been some comment that her characters aren't the way I have them here. And why would Ranma have a crush on Nabiki?

Okay, think about this. You live in a house with three very pretty girls. One of them you can't bring yourself to look at in any way other than as a big sister/mother figure. Then there are the other two, the youngest that you happen to be engaged to is violent, quick tempered, never lets you answer any question be fore she belts you and you are forcing yourself to love her.

And there is the third one, she isn't very nice to you, but you think you know why. She was also the only one that seemed excited when you arrived, and she doesn't hit you, ever.

I'd have a minor crush on her myself if I were Ranma.

Let's face it, Nabs, if she were a real person, would be a major babe.

The timeline for this story is just about there. Meaning there aren't going to be any of the big events that occurred in the manga and anime. The story makes an assumption that events alter somewhat with each restart by the Norn. So Herb and Saffron may exist but won't be part of the story.

And finally, for convenience sake. ( ) author's commentary.

Sound effect

Chinese

Japanese usually spoken planetside

English generally spoken aboard ship

And now for sumpin' gnu.

On with the tale

PALADIN ½ - SHE'S THE ONE

Chapter 6- Of fish and Broccoli

Kasumi was still having a difficult time catching her breath, Mr. Macon had shaken her hand and it still tingled from his touch. The electricity of it still ran along her arm, raising goose bumps and the blush she knew she had to have blaring it to the world. Ranma, in his sweet and clueless manner asked, "Sumpin' wrong Kasumi? Looks like ya might have a fever."

"I'm fine Ranma. Please, Mr. Macon, come in. Lunch is ready, have a seat while I go get it." Kasumi said softly, her eyes looking to the floor. She hoped she could clear up the blush before she returned from the kitchen. She felt it would embarrass their guests to have her blushing like a schoolgirl over him. There were times, like this one, that Kasumi wished she were a schoolgirl and could get away with displays of silly girlish behavior.

While Kasumi was retrieving the large serving platter with the lunch of steamed fish, stir-fried vegetables with sausage and rice, along with tea, she heard the man speaking to his daughter again. "Kitty, take the seiza I showed at home and kneel at the table, that's a good girl, just like that! Now let me show you how to hold your chopsticks."

When she stepped from the kitchen she saw the very kind man doing what her own father had done for her when she was small, teaching his daughter the proper way to hold chopsticks. Kasumi had found herself after Nabiki had shown her the pictures of this man on the internet from news reports and interviews, and celebrity gatherings, hoping he was indeed a kind man that was as wonderful inside as he looked from the outside. His interaction with his daughter proved beyond any doubt, in her mind, that her hopes were more than met. At least about his kindness.

Kasumi was secretly glad the two idiots were out at the moment. She imagined they were drinking themselves into a stupor making more foolish plans to marry Ranma and Akane. Kasumi watched Ranma as he watched Mr. Macon with his daughter. Looking up to them the man noticed something sad in Ranma's eyes. Something sad and a little jealousy as well. Taking a guess that it might help the young man out, Jerrod asked quietly. "Would you like to show her how Ranma?"

Kasumi was amazed at the way the man saw the hurt in Ranma's eyes and wondered if he suspected that it was something Ranma's own father never did, being gentle while teaching him something so simple as how to use chopsticks. She watched with sisterly pride as Ranma slowly nodded his head and happily drew closer to the small feline looking girl and very gently took her little hand in his to show her how to hold the sticks.

For his part Ranma had been a little surprised for his new friend to offer to let him teach Kitty how to use the traditional utensils. 'Pops never was like this guy! Paladin is gentle with his kid, pops is always takin' advantage. Paladin is friendly an' soft spoken, but that grip he's got, I bet he could crush rock with a little practice!' Ranma thought, while he laughed at how Kitty was clumsily getting the hang of the bamboo tools. She giggled too, as if it were a great game.

The meal went very well, Ranma even ate at the pace normal people did. Kasumi noticed how he was very careful not to go as fast as he normally would. Mr. Macon ate and watched how his daughter and Ranma got along, with a smile of fatherly pride as Kitty gave her friend a piece of her fish when she finally figured out to hold the chopsticks and still get food out of the dish.

"Mr. Macon, how long did you plan on staying in Nerima?" Kasumi asked, trying to strike up light conversation with the very interesting man.

"I really have no idea Miss Kasumi. From the looks of things, if I try to leave too soon, I won't hear the end of it from Kitty!" He smiled at her brightly.

"She is a darling little girl." Kasumi replied, noticing that both Ranma and Kitty were ignoring the conversation between the older people at the table. She also noticed that Kitty wasn't eating her broccoli. This didn't bother her; after all, it hadn't been her favorite vegetable at that age either.

"Thank you, I'm almost always amazed at how well she behaves myself." Paladin admitted. Knowing that at home she would be more interested in her stuffed toys or pestering 'Uncle' Bill for piggy-back, he also didn't want to admit it, but he was equally amazed at how easily Kitty managed to get along with everyone. Total strangers were likely to stop doing what they were doing to interact with his little girl.

To say that Jerrod was proud and very loving of his daughter would be just barely an understatement.

"Now Kitty-chan, ya gotta eat yer broccli too! Ya wanna grow up and be strong like yer dad doncha?" the adults heard that from Ranma and both looked more closely at the by-play between child and teen. Kasumi noticed Paladin cocking one eyebrow at the reply he knew was coming and wondered what it would be.

"But I don' wanna be strong like my daddy. I'm a girl!" Kitty said it like it was the most earth-shaking piece of news to hit the Tendo household. "'Sides, I make stinky noises when I eats brocococolili."

At that declaration Kasumi was slightly dismayed for an appropriately polite reaction, the statement was so cute and silly. But at the same time the reference was so improper she didn't know what to do. Ranma on the other hand had no such drawback. Even though he was still blushing from the words of the little girl, he laughed. This allowed Kasumi to do the same, although she laughed from behind her hand.

With a tolerant smile, Paladin opened his mouth to correct Kitty, when the front door opened and the rest of the household arrived. Akane was the last through the door and had a face of severe distaste, which she had directed at the two men that came in before her and Nabiki.

She and Nabiki had caught up with the idiots and kept from greeting the fathers and just listened as the two men formulated another plan to get her and Ranma married, post haste! Of course this plan required cooperation from more than just the two unenthused participants, as well as a bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, a mood ring, a lava lamp an egg beater and a pair of mink slippers.

In case you are wondering, no, the plan only seemed to make sense to the two drunken too early in the day, only three active neurons in their entire heads between them, and normally less than lucid patriarchs of the two families. Why Akane was so disgusted with them is the idea she had conjured that a bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, and a mood ring, a lava lamp an eggbeater and a pair of mink slippers could be used for. Her own thoughts on this would have made even the most hardened and jaded of perverts blush. (Don't ask what those thoughts were, I am not one of those hardened and jaded perverts, I'm a normal run of the mill slightly crazy writer.)

(Besides, it took me days and days to be able to get back to this point after my mind encountered the completely unwholesome ideas emanating from the uncute thick thighed gorilla butt tomboy that can't cook. I had to go in for a good brainwashing and sanforizing.)

On the Heaven plane in Asgard, Urd was occupied in her shift of monitoring the progress of the new Champion of Wishes. She'd been waiting for an opportunity to see the fabulous man naked. Not that she was really all that interested in a mortal. Oh no (We all know how Urd is about anyone of the masculine persuasion. No mans pants are safe from her grabby grip.), but the idea that the man could even make Bell second think her relationship with Keichi was something not to over look. Her monitoring was getting dull when she picked up the thoughts from the Tendo and Saotome patriarchs. She found herself wondering what the two inebriated idiots could possibly do with a bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, a mood ring, a lava lamp an eggbeater and a pair of mink slippers. Digging into their minds a bit deeper she found the uses to be very mundane and not very imaginative.

She then tuned in on the thoughts of Akane Tendo and found out her thoughts when Akane heard of the plans using a bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, a mood ring, a lava lamp an eggbeater and a pair of mink slippers. The thoughts that Urd then received were enough to make even her blush. Grabbing a pad and pen she began making notes. Promising to keep a closer eye on Akane for her next shift. The girl had some very interesting ideas.

Upon their entry the two men and two teen girls stopped talking and stared into the dining area. Lunch had been going on for some time, and Kasumi hadn't waited for them to get home! Genma was sure his ingrate son had already swallowed the best and largest pieces of fish! Nabiki was slightly caught off guard, she'd intended to be home before Mr. Macon called so that she could go meet him and prepare him for her just a bit more than slightly crazy family. Akane was angry because that PERVERT was sitting with a thing in his lap and treating it like it was some kind of kid. AND there was a … a…. (gulp) a real man in the house too, and he looked like he was getting along with Ranma, and had even been talking to Kasumi.

This wasn't to be accepted, there was no way there could be anyone that would be interested in Kasumi over her. (Kasumi being twice as pretty, three times as sweet and a truly accomplished cook never entered Akane's mind.) Well, there was doctor Tofu, but that was a long time issue. This new man needed to just turn and see Akane and she'd be his deepest interest in no time. Akane just knew it! The girl did what she normally did when confronted by a new situation that she can't fully grasp. She thought long and hard.

Unfortunately these thoughts had to do with the man in the dining area and what she would do with a bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, a mood ring, a lava lamp an eggbeater and a pair of mink slippers and him. Outwardly she had the appearance of mental lockdown, total system failure and in desperate need of a reboot.

Nabiki stepped around the three other people that lived in the house and approached Paladin her hand extended in greeting. Jerrod stood and took her proffered hand and shook it in greeting. "Mr. Macon? It's nice to meet you! I'm sorry I wasn't home earlier to meet you at the train, but I did have school and I was unable to break away. I see you found the house easily enough. I'm Nabiki by the way."

Paladin grinned in a way that showed he was teasing all of them lightly and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you as well Miss Nabiki. We ran into a native guide in the park. He had decided that he could take time from his flight and help out some people that were trying to find their way. My daughter seemed to want to learn how to fly from the young man too!"

At the last sentence everyone in the family looked to Akane, who still stood entranced at the sight of the gaijin man that spoke Japanese almost flawlessly. Normally her response to the others looking at her like this would have been "What?" That is normally, her response at this time was just to stare with a very blank look on her face a slight blush creeping up her cheeks.

Nabiki turned back to him, her hand feeling something of a tingle that went all the way to her toes. 'This guy has almost as much sheer power as Ranma, but a very gentle way about himself. I wonder if he's as unaware of how good he looks as Ranma is?' she was thinking as she said, "Well, Ranma almost always seems to know where he needs to be! His ground crew also seems to know where to aim him as well." She said the last looking at her little sister with a knowing smirk.

Paladins smile grew a bit bigger, "Do you think I could get his auto-graph? I've always wanted to meet a super-man."

Nabiki's jaw dropped slightly, she'd never known anyone to take a good-humored jab at Ranma and have Ranma actually laugh with comfortable embarrassment. She felt a slight regret as he released her hand and turned back to the table to return to his meal. At the motion the two drunken martial arts fathers finally broke away from the shock they had of a strange man in the Tendo home, easily talking to Nabiki as if she weren't the cold calculating businesswoman who should be feared that she was. And approached their normal places for their share of the lunch.

"Let me introduce everyone then Mr. Macon." Nabiki said as she took her place at the table. This would have been easier to do if Ranma hadn't been sitting there, with Kitty to his left. Jerrod had been sitting at the place normally used by Ranma. So Nabiki found herself sitting beside Ranma

This would normally have caused some sort of violent reaction from Akane, but she remembered what Nabiki had told her the day before. Even so, Akane should have reacted in some way. That she hadn't yet caused Nabiki to glance back to the entryway of the house. Her little sister was still glued to the place she had been standing when Paladin had stood up and greeted Nabiki and she was staring.

Into space.

Vacantly, with a small dribble of drool escaping the corner of her mouth.

Shrugging, Nabiki pointed to Soun and said, "This is our father, Soun Tendou. Beside him is Ranma's father Genma. Kasumi and Ranma you've met. The zombie that came in with us is our little sister, and Ranma's fiancée, Akane."

Jerrod nodded and shook hands with everyone as they were introduced. Not wanting to get up again, as it was becoming tedious, he remained seated at the introduction of Akane. The word fiancée brought a small smile to his face. 'I think I see a potential problem there. These cultural differences where kids can be engaged should be abolished. Most of the time they're too young to even know what they want to be when they grow up!' He thought to himself. Forgetting that he too had been a teen not long before. 'I wonder if that girl Akane has some kind of deficiency. She's been standing there for a long time already, and it looks like she's having some kind of seizure. It does explain who Miss Kasumi meant when she said Akane isn't very careful with Ranma.'

(Yes, it's instant puppy love. But you know the problem with puppies? They grow up to be dogs and shed all over the place, and smell bad. And puppies are a terror to house train.)

Nabiki was pleased; the remainder of the meal was going very well. At least as far as her family was concerned. Genma had a large bead of sweat forming on his head from pain, he had tried the age old 'intimidate the newcomer by showing how strong your grip is,' this is also known as the 'Saotome School of Anything Goes "do something really stupid" technique.'

He'd tried to crush Jerrods hand in his when Jerrod just looked at him with an embarrassed smile of some sort. As Nabiki's guest, he should have been exempt from Genma's idiocy, she should have known better. The panda wasn't very smart after all. Ranma only smirked at his father when Jerrod returned the squeeze, and kept squeezing. That Jerrod could have broken his hand and ground it into a jelly became evident as Genma let out a yip and started trying to pull away. The moment that happened, Jerrod released his hand. The panda fell back and nearly whimpered like a baby. "I'm sorry Mr. Saotome! I didn't realize I was gripping so hard." Paladin said apologetically.

Then Nabiki recognized the look that her guest had given. It was the same one Ranma usually had when he had to put down Kuno. That was when Nabiki realized that Ranma didn't really like punishing the moron at school. Ranma would have a sad embarrassed smile most of the time in his dealings with Tatewaki, the same kind of smile that Jerrod had just displayed.

Akane still hadn't moved.

One good thing from the exhibition of stupidity by Genma was that his 'speed training' wasn't used at all during this particular meal. He just couldn't operate the hand well enough to hold onto his chopsticks until he changed to his left hand.

Soun had been balked during the entire meal from the time he had walked in the door with his friend. Every time either he or Genma would try to get Ranma involved in a discussion about the engagement. Either Nabiki would glare at them, this Macon person would ask a question of Ranma or the girls, or that amazingly cute little girl would do or say something that would get everyone at the table smiling, sometimes laughing out loud.

Soun found himself liking the younger man, he wasn't boisterous and loud like the Saotome's, but he did have a confidence that made one feel as if they were no longer as high on the social ladder as they had been. This Macon person wasn't threatening, or demanding. He just exuded confidence and authority. Soun decided he was a man that gave orders and they were followed, and more than that. If Macon said he would do something, it would be done.

Soun didn't recognize something else that he felt about the man, but he knew it made him slightly uncomfortable. Not that he had any fear that Macon would do anything dishonorable to his daughters, far from it. Soun actually felt that Macon would use everything at his disposal to protect the girls in this home. No, what Soun was feeling was that his own authority had shifted in importance when he had shaken the hand of the man at his table. The demonstration by his friend Genma had proven something there as well.

Soun hadn't realized it at the time, but his authority had slipped back when the Saotome's had arrived. That the protection of the home had actually fallen to Ranma, instead of the older of the two wasn't wasted on Soun. Where Ranma had to remind everyone how good he was at the Art, this man Macon felt he had nothing to prove, and wouldn't be intimidated. Genma's bruised hand showed that.

For the first time in his life, Soun found himself fearing for the Master, hoping the old pervert would stay away while this man was staying here.

Genma, to his credit was honestly testing the man. He had felt the air of authority of the Macon person and wanted to see if he could be cowed. Genma hadn't expected the man to be stronger than Ranma in that grip; the bones in his hand would be bruised for a week at least! This didn't alter that Genma's own opinion of Mr. Macon was still quite low.

This stranger moving in like he had, with his odd looking daughter and making everyone around them feel comfortable and at ease, put Genma on edge. He couldn't put his sometimes panda claw on it, but there was change in the air. Something was going to happen and Genma was fairly certain he wouldn't like it.

'As long as this man doesn't interfere with the joining of the Schools, it should be fine.' Genma thought to himself. 'The boy can handle him if he is a danger to the Dojo. I wonder if he's here with some sort of plan to kidnap Akane again?' This last was thought with some level of hope. Genma was under the impression that one more kidnapping of Akane would cinch the deal between the families and the foolish boy would concede to the marriage with no more argument.

The lunchtime meal ended with Kasumi gathering the dishes and taking them back to the kitchen. Kitty was enthralled by the young woman, she acted the way Kitty felt a mommy should act! Except when she looked or spoke to daddy. Then she'd act like Jane sometimes does, blushing and stuttering. Not wanting to spend very much time without the young woman, Kitty got up and followed her into the kitchen, and crouched down at the end of the island preparation table and watched her.

Kitty's ear's flicked forward as she heard Kasumi begun to hum a little song while she washed dishes. Kitty liked the sound of it, so much that she found herself kneeling on the floor and leaning against the island. The voice was so pretty and the song so nice, Kitty couldn't help it. It reminded her of mama purring when she and her siblings were nursing. Since she was already full, she did the next thing that happens when a child is near a motherly figure and they feel warm and safe. She fell asleep.

With the meal finished, Paladin went to sit on the veranda/porch. The afternoon had turned pleasantly warm, the sounds of the rest of the house had settled into what must be fairly routine for them, and he was able to relax for a bit. He had noticed a level of tension in the home that would be problematical if it deteriorated. Jerrod had noticed that both men attempted to engage Ranma in a discussion about an upcoming 'wedding'. While this was probably none of his business, he could see the boy wasn't at all comfortable with the topic and the older men were pushing. So Paladin did what Star Ship captains do, he rose to battle. If one were to consider it tactically, the best way to upset the battle plans of these opponents was to interrupt with questions of the young man, ask the older men about being masters of their art or to encourage Kitties cuteness. The skirmish seemed to be an easy one, along with his unknowing allies of Nabiki and Kasumi.

Akane remained rooted to the floor of the entryway, the drool still flowing, a glazed look in her eyes.

He closed his eyes at the thought of the beautiful young woman and sighed to himself. Hoping that it went unnoticed. He wasn't here for that. He was supposed to become Ranma's friend, and probably help out a few other people with the problems that they had. The girl Kasumi seemed happy enough already. He couldn't imagine what she could need. That she was sweet and kind showed in the 'wish' he'd been told of concerning Ranma. Jerrod assumed correctly where that wish had come from, just his own impression of the girl.

And from what Jerrod had already seen the kid really needed a friend.

He felt the approach of Nabiki and she knelt a few feet from him and began to ask him if he'd like to discuss the financial agreement.

"Miss Nabiki, while I know it is a very important issue, the best thing to do after a good meal and pleasant conversation is to relax in the afternoon sun. I have a few papers in my pack for you, they are already signed and the amount to be paid is stipulated there." For some reason Paladin felt this wouldn't insult the girl, but he did get the impression she was being denied something that might be her favorite topic. "I'll get them out for you in a moment. For now just relax and close your eyes and let the sun warm you."

Nabiki had been slightly disappointed by this. She really hated not being in control of a situation, particularly when money was involved. She did feel that she could trust Mr. Macon. He'd sent an amazingly large amount of money for just a deposit for his stay. The amount told her he was used to spending far larger amounts on much better accommodations, and fancier food. But he did seem relaxed around the family, even with the arrangement the Saotome's and Tendo's were already in. He was right though, it did feel good to sit in the warm sun after a good meal and relax. While Nabiki relaxed she found herself wondering if the man had known what he was doing when he interrupted the old idiots when they tried to implement their plan she'd overheard earlier.

She still couldn't figure out what bottle of cod liver oil, a bicycle inner tube, a mood ring, a lava lamp an eggbeater and a pair of mink slippers could be used for. Nabiki also found that she did not really want to know.