Author note: This story will probably not be updated very frequently, we'll see. I'll try my best. I'm away for a month from Saturday so I'll make it harder! I hope you enjoy it anyway.
"Happy New Year, Rizzoli," Nina said, rolling closer to Jane. She trailed a finger from her belly button up to her breast and around the nipple. Jane scrunched her weary eyes together and opened them.
"Already?" she asked, stifling a yawn. "I closed my eyes five minutes ago."
"Two hours and sixteen minutes ago." Nina raised an eyebrow. Last New Year's Eve, Jane spent with Maura. They went to a swanky bar in the city for which Maura had been given two VIP tickets. The venue fell short on atmosphere but made up for it with expensive beer that she didn't have to pay for.
Lying in Nina's bed in a tiny, rundown apartment failed in comparison. Anything would have failed in comparison. Except for lying in Maura's bed in a tiny, rundown apartment. Something that would never happen, even if Maura did return.
"I'm sorry you're spending a crappy new year with me," Jane said, rolling onto her front. She crossed her arms in front of her and turned her head to the side. "Not exactly the life and soul of the party."
"The last time I wished someone other than family and colleagues a Happy New Year was two days before my fiancé died. It's hardly my favourite holiday."
"Then I'm even more sorry that you chose me as the first other person."
"Hardly," Nina laughed. "You're just a colleague."
"A colleague who's seen you naked." Jane sat up and ran a hand along Nina's arms. "Who's kissed every inch of your body." Her lips touched her shoulder blade, her breast, her abdomen. "Who's made you scream so loud your neighbours had to bang on the wall. Definitely just a colleague."
"What would you call yourself?" Nina asked.
"What is it the cool kids say?" Jane shrugged. "Friends with benefits?"
"How about, an experiment?"
"You want to be known as my experiment?" Jane raised an eyebrow, her eyes trained on Nina's. The concept of experimentation didn't sit well with her. What they were doing had very few names, none of which was very flattering. What Jane did know was that she didn't experiment with other people's feelings.
"No. But that's what this is, isn't it? You're trying it on for size before you do it properly, if she comes back."
Jane gritted her teeth. Neither of them had to say her name. They both knew who Nina was referring to. Jane sat up and dropped her long legs down the side of the bed.
Nina shifted her position. "Maura's probably never coming home."
"I didn't say anything about Maura," Jane said, clenching her hands.
"You don't have to." Jane pulled the bed sheets up around her body as she processed Nina's words. For the first time since their first time she felt self-conscious. Nina cleared her throat and continued to speak. "She's here. She's always here."
"So is your fiancé," she said, realising her mistake before it had fully slipped out of her mouth. She lowered her head and ignored Nina's movement behind her.
"You're going to compare my six year relationship that ended prematurely because of his death with your, whatever it is, with Maura."
When Jane turned around, Nina stood in her underwear, pulling a sweater over her head and down around her body.
Jane's shoulders sunk. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to sound that way."
"You're right, though." Nina's tone was heavy, laced with a bitter sadness. Jane stared up at her, watching the emotions dance across her face. "He's always with me."
"Always?" Jane dropped the sheet and crawled across the bed to the other side. She slipped her legs over the edge and took one of Nina's hands. She tugged it away again.
"Always." She placed one leg into her jeans, then the other.
"What about Debbie? I heard she got demoted to traffic cop."
"Meh, went off her." Jane stood beside her, her nakedness the last thing on her mind. She slipped an arm around Nina's back and pulled her close. "She's not exactly what you'd call intelligent. I like smart girls."
"What are you doing with me then?" Jane asked, slipping each hand into the back pockets of Nina's jeans and closing the gap.
Nina's eyes softened. "I heard you got into BCU but couldn't afford to go."
Jane froze. She slipped her hands out of Nina's pockets. An uncomfortable feeling settled over her. "Where did you hear that?"
"Err, Maura."
"I need to go," Jane said, reaching down to pick her panties up off the floor and slide them up her legs. She pulled her pants around her hips and slipped a t-shirt down over her chest. She grabbed the door handle when Nina called her back.
"You forgot your bra," Nina said, handing it over. Jane stuffed it into her pocket and opened the door.
Out on the street, Jane marched away from Nina's apartment. She silently wished her cell phone would ring. If someone had been murdered then she would have something to keep her mind occupied. But if her cell phone rang than Nina's probably would too. She couldn't blame her for accumulating knowledge before Maura left. The act wasn't malicious. Maura probably said more than she anticipated whilst distracted. What bothered her was that regardless of how hard she tried, Maura would not go away. She no longer lived in the country, yet she remained permanently attached to everything Jane did.
"Jane, I need to tell you something." Maura's eyes creased at the corners, her brow furrowed.
Jane's heart thrummed against her chest, fighting for freedom. "Is everything alright?"
"Everything's fine. It's not like that. I hope this can be a good thing, but, I really don't know. I've tried to make sense of it. To understand how you might feel. This connection, I just don't know if you feel it too. I thought we were friends."
"We are friends," Jane said, cutting Maura short.
"I'm in love with you," Maura said, her gaze lingering on the bottle of beer in Jane's hands.
"What did you just say?"
Maura lifted her head and refocused her eyes until Jane couldn't help but stare into them. "I have fallen in love with you."
"You ruined everything," she muttered, walking straight into BPD headquarters. If there were no murders then she would relieve the detective on duty. Anything to distract her from her own mind.
By three in the morning a call came in. Jane phoned Korsak and jumped in her car. The nightclub was still full of people when they arrived. Partygoers looked on, petrified by the woman's body lay in the middle of the dance floor, the balcony above taped off by a uniformed officer.
"What have we got?" Jane asked another uniformed colleague stood beside the body.
"She's called Larissa Paris," the woman said. "Age twenty-nine, from Portland, Oregon. She was here with a couple of girlfriends. Neither of them saw what happened. She was last seen outside the ladies restroom arguing with a man. Nobody's seen him since."
Jane rubbed her temples. The early hour and lack of sleep finally caught up with her. "You called us out here when it was probably an accident?"
"We called you out because it's a suspicious death."
"Rein it in, Rizzoli," Korsak said, standing behind her. "She's just doing her job, now go and do yours."