Title: Blue-eyed Angel, 16/?
Author: Goddess Evie
Date: June 11, 2015
Category: JJHR, Angst
Summary: Race and Estella would have been one hell of a power couple if they hadn't got divorced. Jessie needs a moment to herself, but that may be her downfall.
Disclaimer: I do not own JQ. I make no money off this story. I am only using the characters for my own unique story. I also do not own "How to Save a Life" by The Fray. I merely use the lyrics to enhance my humble writing.
Author's Note: What is it about another fic writer posting a new chapter that makes you want to go write a new one for your own fic? Anyways, I really had fun writing Estella and Race in this chapter. And this is the start of another plot point I've been waiting to get to FOREVER. Of course, it doesn't land until the very end. Um, sorry? Not really. I know you all love it.
Thanks to those who faithfully review! Here's another chapter for you all, especially!
Chapter 16 Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitterness. And I would have stayed up with you all night had I known how to save a life.
When Race entered the school three hours after he'd left it, a dozen parents stood in a group talking to Principal Walker—living in town, they could get to the school faster. And Rockport High's football coach, Mr. Lamar. But Race had eyes only for his daughter, hunched over by herself in a chair, hugging her backpack like a shield or a security blanket, being guarded by a security officer and the school's SRO. The scowl Race already wore deepened. Next to him, Estella actually growled.
These people didn't know what was about to hit them.
Principal Walker and the parents turned to face Race and Estella as they entered the office. Race wanted to plow right through them and go to his daughter. He almost did, but Estella put a calming hand on his arm.
"What's going on?" Race asked, his voice low. Dangerous. He zeroed his gaze on Principal Walker.
The phone call they'd received had been vague. An incident had happened. Jessie'd been involved. They needed to come to the school right away.
"Your daughter started a fight today after second period," Principal Walker said, the earlier helpfulness gone from his demeanor. Now he looked down on Race and Estella with contempt. "And she defaced school property."
"Why?" Race asked, not budging, not looking away from the Principal's gaze.
"Why doesn't matter-" Principal Walker began.
Race cut the man off. "It sure as hell does matter. I want the whole story."
"We've got a no tolerance policy when it comes to fighting. And vandalism," Principal Walker stated. "I don't care who the student is."
"She took out half my football team," Coach Lamar added.
"Seems to me that says more about your football team than my daughter," Race fired back.
Coach Lamar stuttered in his surprise while the group of parents audibly gasped.
"Would it be alright if we didn't have this discussion here in public?" Estella cut in. "Isn't there a more private place we could talk?"
Principal Walker nodded, finally showing a little humility. "Of course. I think we'll all fit in the conference room."
He turned and led the way. Race and Estella followed Coach Lamar and the parents in. Halfway there, Race stopped and glanced at Jessie. He shared a look with Estella. She nodded at him, then turned to follow the group into the conference room.
Race approached his daughter and crouched in front of her. How many times had they been in this position now? "Jessie?"
She looked up and gasped a little. And reached out to take his hand. All on her own. Race stared shocked for a moment while Jessie composed yourself.
"Are you alright?" he asked her softly.
"Yes. I- Yes." She was breathing a little quickly.
"It's okay, Jess. Calm down."
She shook her head. "I didn't mean to. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt anybody. I just…got overwhelmed. I'm so sorry, daddy. I'm so sorry."
Jessie leaned her forehead on Race's shoulder. Between that simple gesture and the "daddy", he was fighting back tears as he gently stroked her hair.
"Shh, Ponchita. I'm not mad. Please just tell me what happened."
He still didn't like the way her breathing was quick and short, or the way she was trembling. But he also recognized the progress she demonstrating in allowing this physical contact, as simple as it was. And whatever anger she'd held for him, it seemed to be all gone.
After some long moments, Jessie lifted her head again and looked into Race's eyes. He noticed the bruise forming on her cheek but hid the anger that burst inside him. It wasn't what Jessie needed right now.
"I was walking to Anatomy. On one of the walls there were pictures. His pictures. It was a memorial for him. And it reminded me of that room. And I just couldn't take it. But I really didn't mean to hurt anybody."
Race couldn't say anything. His anger was too fiery and he wasn't going to release it in front of Jessie. So he silently stayed where he was, holding onto her hands, waiting for her trembling to stop.
"I'm going to go speak with Principal Walker," Race said when he finally could control himself. "Are you going to be okay out here?"
Jessie pressed her mouth into a tight line, but she nodded. Race gave her hands a squeeze then stood. He took a step back and looked back and forth between the security officer and the SRO.
"Stop treating her like a damn criminal," he growled, surprising both men.
The pair shared an uneasy glance.
Race added, "You make sure no one comes near her."
Maybe it was the authoritative tone in his voice, maybe it was these two were just used to following orders, but both men nodded. And their demeanor changed. Now instead of being Jessie's jailors, they were her guardians.
Satisfied, Race walked toward the conference room. Right in the middle of Estella's tirade. She'd easily taken control of the conversation in the short time Race had spoken with Jessie. He stood just inside the door watching her go, and smiling in admiration of her.
"After all the contributions my husband and Dr. Quest have made to this school, the accolades my daughter has brought through academics and athletics, she makes one mistake and you condemn her?"
"It's a pretty big mistake…" Principal Walker tried to reason. He didn't sound very reasonable to Race.
"You cannot tell me that you are unaware of what my daughter is going through?" Estella asked. The anger in her voice would have been enough to scare away a jaguar in the South American jungles she was used to living in.
Principal Walker paled. "Well, the details have been very vague."
"You have to be nothing short of a complete idiot not to put two and two together," Estella said with the calm before a storm.
"Ms. Velasquez, insults are uncalled for," Principal Walker said.
"You assured me that Jessie would be taken care of this morning. And then you betrayed that trust," Estella shot at him. "I'd say you fit the criteria for complete idiot perfectly."
As much as Race would love to stand there and watch Estella cut Principal Walker down to nothing, he knew it was time to step in. She was getting so angry her Columbian accent was getting more pronounced. Race knew that meant she was on the verge of switching to her native Spanish. A language in which she could lob crueler insults, the fact the recipients would have no idea what she was saying be damned.
"Ladies and gentlemen," he addressed the gathered parents who stood staring in awe at Estella. "I'd like to apologize on behalf of my daughter. She is truly upset by her actions. I hope you will all be understanding toward what she's going through right now. It has not been easy for us as a family and we're doing our best to cope and heal. If any of your children require medical attention, please contact me about the expenses and I will personally cover them."
The parents looked around at each other, nodding. Not one brought up any objections.
"Now, if you'll all excuse us, my wife and I need to speak privately with Principal Walker."
Quietly the parents filed out of the conference room. Race watched them through the floor to ceiling windows as they exited the office. Other than a few glances, not a one interacted with Jessie, partially helped by the protective glares of the security guard and police officer still standing watch over her.
Once the group had cleared the office, Race turned his attention back to Principal Walker.
But before he could say anything, Coach Lamar spoke up. "What are you going to do about my football team, Mr. Bannon?"
"You should be asking Principal Walker here that question," Race responded, the danger back in his voice. "Fighting is not tolerated, and Jessie didn't fight herself. So where's the half of the football team that she took out?"
"Well, if wasn't half the team," Coach Lamar said. "More like a half dozen players. They're in the nurse's office getting checked over."
"Did Jessie receive the same treatment?" Race asked. His steely gaze hadn't moved from Principal Walker. "And if you plan on punishing my daughter, are you planning on punishing them?"
"They were trying to stop your daughter from vandalizing school property," Coach Lamar complained.
"Two wrongs don't make a right," Estella said curtly.
"And fighting is fighting," Race added immediately. "It's not their job to enforce the rules. What's the punishment for fighting?"
Principal Walker swallowed. "Five days suspension. Including from participating in sporting events."
"Our first game is Friday. You can't take away my players. They're all first string!"
"Your first string players ganged up against my daughter. It was six of them against her by herself," Race said. He could feel his anger simmering just below the surface, but he had it well in check. Being used to taking on mad men and hardened criminals, he knew he wouldn't need his full intimidation factor against a school principal and football coach.
Coach Lamar seemed to realize he was on the losing end of this argument. His deep frown said he wasn't too fond of it, but he had no defense against Race's logic. With a scowl at Principal Walker, he threw out one last, "Don't take my players away," before he too left the office.
As with the parents, Race watched him until he was out of the office. The security guard and police officer stood staunch sentinels.
Race turned back once more to Principal Walker. By his side, Estella stood tall and solid. Principal Walker was doing his best to hold Race' gaze, to not look away first, to hold his ground.
"The policy is clear, Mr. Bannon. Ms. Velasquez. Even in your daughter's case. Her condition does not excuse her behavior," he said.
"I would like an explanation as to why you've allowed this memorial in the first place," Race calmly demanded.
"Zachary Ellis was a well-loved student in this school. His death has affected many of our students. It's in their rights to express grief and mourning in such a situation," Principal Walker explained.
"So you're just going to ignore what he did to my daughter?" Race asked, that simmering anger beginning to boil.
"Those are only allegations," Principal Walker excused.
"Look at my daughter," Estella said, her voice tight. "Does she look like someone who is suffering from 'allegations'?"
Principal Walker glanced past the pair to Jessie, then lowered his gaze to the conference table.
Estella continued, "I know you know my daughter. That she's strong. And respectful. And not the type of person to go around starting fights. I know she has had a spotless record in this school until today. So will you please stop demonizing and start showing a little compassion?"
Principal Walker continued to stare at the conference table. "That memorial meant a lot to the students at this school."
"Fine. The students want to memorialize a criminal," Race said, needing to get to the root of the problem. "But you, Mr. Walker, neglected to warn us about it. If you had warned Jessie that it was there, she could have known to avoid it. Or she could have decided she wasn't ready to come back to school at this moment. But you didn't say a damn thing about it. You knew the delicacy of the situation. You listened to us tell you how fragile our daughter was, and you failed to mention this thing that could set her off. And that, Mr. Walker, is on you. This entire situation could have been avoided if you had done your job."
With nothing more to say, and certainly not wanting to hear any more of whatever excuses Principal Walker had to say, Race turned and walked out of the conference room. Estella was by his side.
Race paused in front of Jessie. "Hey, Ponchita, let's go home."
Jessie looked up, that lost look still on her face. She nodded and rose mechanically, her backpack dangling from her hand. Race gently took it from her. Estella stepped to Jessie's other side as they walked from the office, as if she and Race could shield her from the world.
Oh if only they could.
Amanda Stone stood outside the office, and she half jumped when she say Race, Jessie and Estella appear.
"Mr. Bannon. Jessie. I'm so sorry. I tried to stop it," she rushed out. "I tried to warn Jessie."
Amanda tried to catch Jessie's eye, but Jessie only looked at the floor.
"Hey, it's not your fault," Race assured.
Amanda swallowed. "Dad and I have been so worried. We've tried to call. And if I'd know you were coming back to school I would have told you about that dumb memorial. I hate it so much. I've wanted to tear it down myself so many times…"
"We've had the phones blocked," Race explained. "We've had to keep the media at bay. Tell your father we're doing okay."
"You know if you need anything you can call us right?" Amanda was still trying to catch Jessie's eye, but Jessie was looking anywhere but at the girl.
"We know," Race assured.
Amanda nodded. "Well, I gotta get to class. I shouldn't even be here. But I was worried. I just wanted to make sure Jessie was okay."
"She will be. Thanks, Amanda," Race said.
Amanda lingered for a moment longer, hoping to get something from Jessie. When Jessie still didn't look at her, Amanda gave a small wave and walked off.
"Let's go home," Race said, and led the way out of the school.
Jessie sat in the backseat of her father's car listening to her mother mutter to herself in Spanish. Mostly about Principal Walker and his idiocy. If she weren't still trying to keep herself from shaking, she'd find it funny.
But she was still fighting the flashbacks that one incident had begun. Mostly she kept going back to that dingy little room. She was stuck there. Without Jonny or Dougan to pull her away. Imprisoned forever in a prison of pictures of herself taken by him.
But there was also the morning she found the envelope taped to the front gate. The feeling of his arms tightly around her as she struggled before the scent of chloroform knocked her out. Waking up in that empty, dingy bedroom. The feel of ropes wound tightly around her wrists.
Jessie kept pushing the images from her mind. She hugged herself tightly, and tried not to let her parents see how distressed she was still. They were worried about her enough. And she was going to cope with this. She needed to learn how. She couldn't let him continue to affect her this way. She just couldn't.
Jessie was surprised when her father slowed the car in front of the compound. Jessie didn't hesitate to open her door and step out of the car. But then she paused, staring at the bay window that looked out from the rec room. She could only see the blue sky and fluffy white clouds reflected in it, but she knew Jonny stood on the other side. Watching her, waiting for her.
And she couldn't face him in this condition.
"Dad," Jessie said.
Race was still standing by the driver's side door, watching her.
"I need some time," she said.
"What do you mean?" Race asked.
Jessie tried to control the nervous energy running through her. Behind the still open car door, her fingers alternated between splayed and balled up. She was glad her dad couldn't see. "I just need…to be alone for a little bit. I don't feel ready to face Jonny. Not like this."
"What do you want to do?"
Estella had come around the front of the car, and she stood by Race. That permanent look of concern she wore had deepened.
"I just need some space. Just for a little while I promise. I just need to be alone for a little bit." Even as she said it, she was taking steps backward.
Race rocked as if he would follow her, but he stayed where he was. Estella grabbed Race's arm.
"I promise I'm not going to do anything. I promise. Just let me have some time."
Jessie'd passed the end of the car, still backing away. She could still see the conflict on her father's face.
"Please just trust me," Jessie said.
Race scowled, but he said, "Fifteen minutes, then I'm coming to get you."
"Okay," she agreed. "I'll be down at the beach. Tell Jonny I'm okay. And I'll be back soon."
Then she turned and ran.
She didn't stop until she was down on the beach halfway between the cliffs and the water. She dropped to a crouched position, hugging herself. But not crying. A few sobs. But no tears. She was here to get herself back under control, not break down.
Breathe, Bannon.
She did just that, pulling air in through her nose and exhaling through her mouth. Matching her breathing to the waves washing upon the sand and then sliding back into the ocean.
You're stronger than this. Don't let him beat you.
Jessie focused on the sand grinding beneath her shoes. The caw of seagulls winging through the sky. The distant sound of traffic moving along the coast road. The things in the here and now. She looked up across the water. The breeze from the ocean felt good on her skin and blowing through her hair.
The images of the past faded away. Her heart steadied. Her shaking calmed.
How long had she been sitting out here already? She didn't know. But she was feeling better. Feeling ready. Jonny needed her. And she'd feel better, she admitted to herself, when she was near him again.
Plus, it would be better to go back on her own then have her father come for her.
Jessie stood up. She took in one last deep breath then turned to start the walk through the sand back to the cliff and the stairs carved into them.
A man in black stood at the bottom of the steps. He wore a helmet and body armor. And he aimed a rifle right at her.