Chapter 5

No One's POV

That night, the Jackson children slept in Cabin Three with Percy, the Grace kids crashed in Cabin One with Jason, the Valdez kids snored away in Cabin Nine, and Jaz slept in the Hades Cabin, not wanting to bunk with the blood thirsty Ares kids.

Amber woke up first. She got dressed in her dark blue Converses, jean shorts, and her camp tee shirt. She pulled her wavy blonde hair into a ponytail and brushed her teeth.

Noah and Theo woke up soon after. Noah wore his camp shirt, cargo shorts, and sea green Converse. Theo got dressed in his camp shirt too, jeans, and black Converse.

Percy woke up to find his kids (sounds weird) already dressed and ready for breakfast.

"So the zombie lives." Aelia muttered sarcastically.

"Ha-ha. Good morning to you too Amber, Theo." He nodded to the girl and his carbon copy.

"I guess I'm invisible, then." Noah sniffed, clearly miffed that his father hadn't acknowledged his presence.

Theo, Percy, and Amber rolled their eyes. Percy pulled on a camp tank top, cream colored cargo shorts, and his red Converses.

Then the four walked to breakfast.

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Cabin One was in chaos.

In the stone cold mausoleum, Skye Silena Grace was deep frying her older brother with lightning bolts.

Jason didn't even know how that was possible, as they were indoors.

"Hey! Skye! Baby girl, don't do that." He tried. His mouth tasted weird.

He just called a girl that was a year younger than him baby girl, for the love of Juno.

Skye didn't listen, naturally. She continued to charbroil Alex. His clothes were burnt to a crisp, only his boxers had been spared (thank the gods). He just giggled as if the bolts tickled.

"Give it back, you fucking douchedick!" Sky screamed.

"Make me, Skylie Whylie!" Alex taunted. Over his head dangled her necklace from Aphrodite and Hephaestus.

"Alex if you don't hand me my necklace I'll rip your eyes out of their sockets and stuff them down your throat so you can watch as I spill out your intestines." Skye growled.

Alex laughed harder as lightning crackled and thunder boomed. Jason's ears popped as the temperature dropped twenty degrees. Winds howled as Alex flew up out of Skye's reach. She roared in frustration and commanded lightning to strike him where the sun doesn't shine.

"Ow!" Alex screeched, clutching his…ahem…area. He dropped like a sand bag. Alex groaned and rolled around in pain.

Skye smirked, gave him one last shock, and plucked the necklace out of his hands.

She clasped the piece of jewelry around her neck.

Jason rubbed his throbbing temples and went to breakfast, leaving his deranged lunatics for children behind.

Behind him, he heard Skye order her older brother in charmspeak, "Now go fuck yourself."

Jason shuddered in sympathy for Alex and continued.

"AND USE CONDOMS!" Skye screamed. Jason stopped dead in his tracks.

Oh gods of Olympus….

Skye rushed past Jason, cackling, her chocolate brown hair flying behind her.

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Percy's POV

We all decided to sit as Zeus's table today. Everyone was digging in, and then Jason appeared, rubbing his temples.

"Remind me to never get Skye angry." He told me, sitting down.

I raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

Jason recounted for all of us what happened in Cabin One this morning. Noah, Theo, and Amber cracked up.

"She-she told him to-to use condoms?" Amber wheezed.

Jason nodded.

They erupted with laughter again, cackling like psychopaths. Theo choked on his blue pancake (I swear, the kid is like a smarter and younger version of me), Noah spewed chocolate milk everywhere, and Amber dropped her fork, and nearly stabbed me in the process.

Meanwhile, the rest of us were wondering why our kids (still sounds weird) were so strange.

Lucas, Caly, and Jaz appeared then. Noah explained to Lucas what Skye did. He chuckled, and then turned pink.

Caly and Jaz just stared at them for a long time, shook their heads, and walked away, muttering about being surrounded by lunatics… or was that idiots?

Skye came out of nowhere and plopped down next to Amber. Amber gave her a high five, still snickering.

Soon after, Alex walked up, sweaty and pale and looking physically drained.

I tried to push the disturbing image of what Alex was just doing to himself in there.

He gave his younger sister the finger. She laughed in response.

"Dad…er…Jason…" Can I ask you a question?" Alex asked him.

Jason turned pale but nodded.

"Why in the name of Hades do you have a box of condoms in your closet?"

The table hushed and turned to look at Piper and Jason.

"Uhm…er…well…" Jason turned red.

Skye gasped. "You haven't been making Jasper babies in the motherfucking CLOSET have you?!"

Their silence was her answer.

Skye turned a sickly shade of yellow. "Oh gods." She clamped her mouth shut. "'Scuse me." She mumbled. Then she rushed away and upchucked into a brazier.

Amber choked on her waffle, Theo had to give her the Heimlich, and Noah brought his knees to his chest and rocked back and forth on his butt, tears running down his face, and Lucas hid his face in his hands.

"Gods of Olympus, save us all." Annabeth groaned.

"Why, Jason? Why?" Amber wheezed.

"Piper, you thunder fucker! How could you?!" Noah wailed.

By now, campers had begun to watch the scene.

Piper turned red at the 'thunder fucker' comment.

Skye returned from throwing up, her face still yellow.

"I'm not keeping my clothes in there." She whimpered.

Amber had a coughing fit. Theo continued to squeeze her stomach in. She choked one last time, and mucus covered waffles came flying out and landed in Lucas's hair.

Lucas screamed and stuck his head in a brazier, hoping to burn it off.

"Lucas! No!" Skye screeched.

Lucas shrieked again and yanked his heads out. Pieces of ashes, wood, old food, mucus, and the remainders of Skye's vomit stuck in his thick curls.

He ran for the hills (or in this case, the lake). I watched as he jumped in, clothes and all.

Amber rubbed her sore throat and gave Theo a pat on the back to show her thanks, as her voice wasn't working.

Noah had his face in his hands, still in tears.

Hazel had long since fainted, Frank was fanning her (where did they even come from), Annabeth was consoling Noah, Amber was drinking water to soothe her throat, Theo was nowhere to be seen, Piper was crimson red and refused to meet anyone's eyes, Jason was banging his head on the table (I don't even know), Skye was still yellow, Alex was still pale and shuddering (probably thinking about what he did to himself earlier), and me? I was the only sane one.

I gazed at the rest of the mess hall. Faces stared back at me, etched with amusement and interest.

Lucas came screaming back into the mess hall like a banshee. His hair clung to his forehead and scalp with muck.

"Get it off! Get it off!" His nose was on fire as he screeched.

He continued to scream around arms flailing. Soon, Amber got so sick of it she started cussing him out in horse (Arion would've been so proud).

"Neigh! You mother-neigh! Whinny! Snort! Go suck a- whinny! Snort! Neigh! Whinny! Whinny! Neigh!" She screamed despite her sore throat.

Noah began bawling again. Frank decided that fanning Hazel wouldn't work, so he turned into a horse (coincidence? I think not) and galloped away with her on his back. Annabeth rubbed Noah's arm. Alex began ripping his clothes and putting ashes over his head in anguish, as if just registering what he did to himself.

"The condoms! Oh my gods, the condoms!" he wailed.

Skye threw up again, but this time it spewed all over Theo. He spat at her angrily and cursed her in… was that whale sounds?

He stormed away, trying to get the puke out of his hair.

Now Alex began to bawl, screaming about doves and condoms.

Skye wheezed and doubled over. "Zeus! Save us!" She cried,

Lucas ran into a tree and got knocked out cold. Amber, somewhat satisfied, dragged him away, muttering curses in Ancient Greek.

These kids curse a lot…

Noah continued to wail, "I don't wanna take the suppository!" He cried.

Annabeth's eyes widened. I don't know why… What the Hades was a suppository?

She rubbed circled on his back, her expression torn between amusement and horror. "I-It's okay, Noah. The-the constipa-pation will pass." She reassured him.

Ah, that makes a lot more sense.

Alex started flying around eyes closed, tears dropping like flies as he cried and screamed for mercy.

Piper and Jason were off to the side, consoling Skye as she threw up over and over.

I checked my watch. 8:45 AM. Only 15 minutes into breakfast.

Today was going to be a long day.