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Chapter Eleven

Breaking Point

When Amy came into the house after putting Autumn away in her stall, she could smell the delicious aroma of dinner, along with the sounds of the twins playing somewhere in the house. Ty was at the counter mashing potatoes, completely oblivious to her presence. She smiled as she watched him work, his shirt sleeves were rolled up, showing the muscles at work. Amy couldn't help herself; she crept slowly behind Ty and slipped her arms around his waist. She felt him jump a little under her touch.

"Something smells good in here," Amy said, resting her cheek against his back.

"Well, it was coming along great," Ty replied. A clatter on the counter-top told her he put the potato-masher down. "But now, I'm not so sure."

"What do you mean?" Amy asked, lifting her head up to look at him, her eyebrows furrowed.

"I mean," Ty started, and turned in her arms. His hands settled lightly on her hips. "Now, that you're in here distracting me, I can't promise how well dinner will turn out."

"Oh, so I'm distracting, am I?" Amy teased, leaning in to press her lips softly to his. Ty didn't hesitate, he returned the kiss and wrapped his arms around her. The kiss intensified as their lips got reacquainted with each other. At the heat of their passion, however, Ty pulled back, smiling a little.

"As much as we wouldn't mind skipping dinner, I don't think the twins would be too happy about that," Ty said.

"I guess you're right," Amy agreed, pouting a little. She stepped backward, putting more distance between them, so that she wasn't tempted to reach out for him again. "So, what can I do to help?"

"You can get out of here, so I can finish dinner," Ty told her, turning back to the dinner. He risked a glance behind him and saw her still standing there. "Go on, get."

"Alright, alright," Amy relented, walking out of the kitchen. "I know Jack and Lily will want the pleasure of my company." She heard Ty laugh as she headed down the hallway to the back room, which they just converted into the twins' play room. That's where she'd heard their playful voices coming from.

When Amy stepped through the doorway, neither twin noticed her right away. Jackson was in the middle of his 'construction pit', surrounded by all his tractors and workers. Lily was having a tea party with her large, stuffed unicorn. The thing was twice her size, it was fun to watch her drag it all over. Amy was too busy watching Lily take a sip of imaginary tea and then hold the plastic tea cup to the unicorn, that she didn't see Jackson walking up to her until he was right in front of her.

"Mommy," Jackson said, his voice a bit whiny. Amy looked down and saw him holding one of his tractors. "Tractor boke." He held up the toy and Amy saw that the front wheels had come apart from the tractor.

"Oh, no," Amy said, kneeling down in front of him and taking the tractor from him. "Let's see if we can fix this." Just as she thought, the wheels snapped right back on and the little boy's face lit up with joy. He took the now-fixed tractor from her and started to hurry back to his game when Amy stopped him. "Hey, what do I get for fixing your toy for you?"

"Oh," Jackson came back to her and wrapped his little arms around her. He mumbled a thank you and then ran back to his game.

"Mommy, tea paree!" Lily exclaimed, finally noticing her mother's presence in the room.

Amy walked over to her and sat down next to the stuffed unicorn. "A tea party?" she asked the toddler, just as Lily handed her a purple, plastic tea cup. Lily picked up her light blue tea pot and pretended to pour tea into Amy's cup. Amy put the cup to her lips and took a pretend sip. "Mmm," The little girl smiled big, excited that her mommy liked something she made.

"Dinner's ready!" Ty announced, peeking his head inside the play room.

"Did you hear that? Let's go eat," Amy said to her daughter, setting the toy cup down and standing up. Lily took one last pretend sip, and ran to the door, dropping the cup behind her. "C'mon, Jack, let's eat." Amy repeated, when she saw the little boy still in the midst of his construction game. He crashed an orange tractor into a small tower of blocks before looking up at Amy. She made a let's go gesture at him. Jackson stood up and followed her out of the room.

Dinner was a project by itself. It all started with Lily saying she didn't want to get buckled into her booster seat and Jackson wanted his blue cup, not the yellow one. By the time Amy and Ty sat down, both twins were eating quietly, or as quiet as they can be. Though, halfway through the meal, they noticed Lily hadn't touched her meat yet. While Jackson was spooning the last of his mashed potatoes into his mouth.

"More, pwease!" Jackson asked, pushing his plate forward for more potatoes.

While Ty spooned a some more potatoes onto Jackson's plate, Amy turned to her daughter. "Lily, don't you want eat some meat to help you grow big and strong?" she asked her.

Lily shook her head, and put her fork down on the table. "All done," she said.

"No, you're not," Amy shook her head. Then, she took away all but five pieces of meat from Lily's plate. "If you eat those pieces, you can be done."

Lily stared up at her, and then, reluctantly, put a piece of meat in her mouth. The rest of the meal went by smoothly, and, afterwards, the twins went off to play some more while Amy and Ty cleaned up the kitchen. Ty loaded the dishwasher, while Amy wiped the table clean, both working in companionable silence. Amy heard the dishwasher click shut and then a hum as it started up, therefore, she wasn't surprised when Ty's arms slipped around her waist. She leaned back into him and closed her eyes, letting her body melt into his. As she stood there enveloped in Ty's arms, Amy didn't realize how tired she actually was until now, the bone-tingling weariness tugging at her. But the night wasn't over yet, and Ty didn't seem as tired.

Ty placed several kisses in the curve of her neck and shoulder, awakening her. "Now, where were we?" he whispered, huskily, his lips never leaving her skin. Amy reached up and hooked her arm around his neck, not wanting him to stop.

"NO! Go 'way!"

"AHHHHH!"

Ty stopped his ministrations and Amy groaned inwardly. "Maybe if we're very quiet, they'll stop on their own," Ty whispered in her ear, his hot breath sending tingles down her spine. Amy knew he was only half-serious, but a part of her hoped they'd work it out themselves. But, of course, the twins were only two, so they didn't. Another scream later and Ty was pulling himself away.

When Amy and Ty entered the play room, it was full-blown chaos. There were toys all over the floor, and Jackson had just thrown a block at his sister. They both quickly diffused the situation, each going to a twin. It took awhile, but they were finally able to piece together what had happened. Apparently, Lily had took some of Jackson's blocks to build a castle, and, of course, Jackson didn't like that. He had knocked over the castle, which caused Lily to throw a toy at him. Leading, Jackson to throw a block at Lily. After the twins were both calmed down, Amy and Ty agreed that it was bath time.

"You can handle bath time, right?" Amy whispered to Ty, catching him by the arm when they both reached the door. "I was thinking of doing a quick, night check on the horses. I won't be long."

"Amy, you know they're going to want to go with you," Ty whispered back, shaking his head. "Can't you wait til they're in bed?"

"It'll be too late by then," Amy protested. "Please, Ty, I'll be five, ten minutes tops."

"Amy, be realistic, they're going to notice the second you walk out that door," Ty tried to explain to her. "Let's just get them to bed, and then you can go check on the horses, I'll even go with you."

"Fine," Amy reluctantly agreed, sighing a little. She walked ahead, picked up Lily and headed up the stairs.

Bath time was a joyous event. The twins seemed to forget their earlier disagreement, now they were happily playing with each other. Jackson had a toy shark, and Lily a sea horse. They were making the toy jump off the edge of the bathtub into the water. When a few droplets of water landed on Ty and after he brought it to their attention, the two of them turned the game into seeing who could get daddy more wet. Amy stood a little back, not wanting to get wet, laughing.

Hearing her, Ty turned toward her. "Can you hand me a towel?" he asked her, reaching his hand out. When Amy stepped forward to hand him a towel to dry off with, Ty grabbed her wrist instead. His other arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her down with him. Amy screamed as she landed almost on top of him.

"Quick, I got mommy!" Ty told the twins. "Get her!"

Lily and Jackson didn't need any more encouragement, they immediately started kicking and splashing. A couple minutes later, Amy's sides hurt from laughing so much and she was all wet. The twins pretty much wore themselves out doing all the splashing, so now they stood quietly as Amy and Ty dried them off and wrapped them in their hooded towels. Lily's was fairy princess towel and Jackson's was a shark. Lily laid her head on Amy's shoulder as she carried her to the twins' room to put her pajamas on.

After the twins were dressed in their pajamas, Lily in her purple My Little Pony jammies and Jackson in his blue Mickey Mouse jammies, they both lay down easily in their beds. They wore pull-ups when they slept, so there was no worries over any accidents. As Amy put on a movie, Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, first Lily, then Jackson asked for a cup of milk. Ty went downstairs to get the milk as Amy finished up with the movie. When she hit play, Lily clapped her hands together and Amy walked over to tuck her in.

"Me too!" Jackson exclaimed, after Amy was done with Lily. She smiled and went over to do the same to him. It was then, Ty came back with the sippy cups full of milk and handed them out. They said, good-night to the twins, gave them each a kiss, and closed the door behind them as they left the room.

"So, you want to go do a night-check on the horses now?" Ty asked her, putting his arm around her as they walked down the hallway. Lobo walked past them, on his way to lay in front of the twins' door.

"You know what? It's late, let's just stay in," Amy declined, surprising Ty a little.

"What? Since when do you say no to night-check?" Ty questioned her.

"I'm tired," Amy shrugged. "Let's just go to bed." She turned and started heading toward their bedroom. But Ty grabbed a hold of her arm before she could get that far.

"Amy, hold up," Ty said. Amy turned and looked at him. "Is there something bothering you? I've noticed you've been distracted lately, with the kids and everything."

"No," Amy shook her head. "If I seem distracted, it's probably because of the new horses. Especially, Ahmed's horse, he's being a little stubborn about making a decision."

"Well, have you tried talking to him?" Ty asked.

"Not yet, but I will," Amy answered. Then, she thought of just telling Ty what she's been feeling lately. "Actually, maybe I have been feeling a little...torn."

"Torn? What do you mean?" Ty asked again, a little confused.

"I don't know," Amy began. "I guess, I feel like I'm not doing enough. When I'm with the twins, I'm thinking of the horses and I what I could be doing, but when I'm actually with the horses, the twins are always right there."

"But that's why we hired Jessica, so you could get back into working with horses and still be near the kids," Ty reminded her. "I thought it was going great."

"It's not," Amy said simply. She turned and walked into their bedroom, before Ty could say anything. When he, too, walked into the room, Amy was standing at the bureau, staring at a picture of herself and Spartan. Ty walked over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. He could feel how wired and tense she felt, like she's been holding something back from him for awhile.

"Amy?"

Amy turned around slowly, and Ty saw tears streaking her face. "I know I'm going to sound like a bad mother when I say this, but," Amy whispered, her voice cracking. "Sometimes I wish, it was just the two of us and we didn't the twins to worry about. It's wrong, I know, and I do love them so so much. It's just...I can't get through one session with a horse without them interrupting, even when Jessica is here. I love being a mother, Ty, I really do, but horses were, are still a big part of my life and I've not ready to give that up yet."

Ty, who had been silent the whole time she'd been speaking, pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. "Why didn't you tell me how you were feeling earlier?" he asked her.

"Because I didn't want to believe that I could be this selfish," Amy said, surprising even herself. She never admitted the reason to herself until now, but she found it to be true. "I thought that maybe, if I gave it time, that things would get easier, better, but it's only gotten harder."

Ty pulled back a little to look at her. "I wish you'd told me sooner," he said, pushing some hair back behind her ear. "Tomorrow, maybe, we can sit down and talk with Jessica on how we can make it easier for you. Right now, though, how about we get some sleep?"

To his surprise, Amy shook her head as she wiped a tissue across her eyes. "No," Amy replied. "I'm sorry, but I can't be here right now. I need to clear my head and figure out exactly what I want and I can't do it here." She went over to the closet, pulled out a small duffel bag and started throwing some clothes in it.

"Amy, come on," Ty said, getting over the shock he'd been in when Amy first mentioned leaving. "Running away isn't the answer, we're a family now, we have to figure this out together." He watched her go over to the bureau to get some more clothes.

"Yeah, well, I didn't know having a family meant giving up something that I love," Amy replied, turning around to face him. "And I'm not running away, I'll be at Heartland."

"So, what am I supposed to tell Lily and Jack when they wake up tomorrow morning, mommy's going away for a little while, but I don't know when she's going to be back?" Ty questioned, feeling suddenly angry at Amy. "Amy, they're not going to know what's going on. All they will know is that their mother is gone. C'mon, Amy, just stay. We'll work this out."

Amy shook her head again, harder this time. "I can't," she managed to get out, her eyes filling with tears again. "You don't understand."

That was it, Ty couldn't believe how selfish Amy was being, so he snapped. "I don't understand?!" he asked her, incredulously. "I don't understand that whenever I'm out on a call, I have to force myself to focus on my work instead of if the twins are alright and getting along with some person who's only been in their life for a few weeks?! That when an emergency comes up, a part of me wishes I didn't have to leave my kids?! Tell me, Amy, what part of that don't I understand?!"

Choking back a sob, Amy ran her hands over her eyes to stop the tears from falling. "Because I'm afraid if I don't get out of here right now, I might end up resenting my own children!" Amy cried. "What part of that is fair?!"

Picking up her now-packed duffel bag, Amy brushed past Ty, out of the room and down the stairs. Ty didn't move until he heard the front door bang close. He let out a shuddering sigh and covered his face with his hands. In that moment, Ty realized he hadn't recognized the Amy that had just left. The Amy he knew and loved wouldn't have deserted her family on a whim like that. She would have stayed and they would've tried to figure this out together. Now, Ty didn't know what he was going to do because he had two sleeping toddlers in the next room, who was on the verge of losing everything they'd ever know, well, until he heard it.

"Daddy?"

Ty turned and saw his daughter standing in the doorway to his room. Her green eyes were wide and a little glassy, and her thumb hovered by her mouth. He didn't know what she had heard, but he automatically felt guilty for yelling. Standing there, Lily looked too young and too innocent. Ty held out his arms and she immediately ran into them.

"Mommy 'eave?" Lily asked, after she was settled in her daddy's arms.

Ty's heart squeezed tight as he held her close to him, her cheek resting against his shoulder. He closed his eyes and breathed in her sweet, young scent. "It's okay," Ty told his daughter, his hand sliding from the top of her head down the length of her hair. "Daddy's here."

A/N: I know everybody is going to have a lot to say about this chapter, but, trust me, I know what I'm doing. Please review! :)