This was a tough one to write. We know that they didn't end up actually talking on the dinner. So this is what I think might have happened. Both Jackson & April POVs.

Also to all the people who reviewed, fav'd or followed, thank you!

Characters are not mine.

"Hi". April smiled.

As soon as Jackson locked eyes with April, he hated himself. Hated that the last thing he thought of before knocking was sex, hated that before he could even muster up a greeting, his eyes involuntarily raked over April's body and he had to swallow roughly to focus. "I need to have sex with my wife". He shook his head and met her eyes again.

"Hey. Umm.. I brought wine."

"Huh?.. Oh. Thanks. Come on in." April didn't really know how else to respond as she was having difficulty focusing on anything except how Jackson was looking at her. She was familiar with that look and what it usually led to but given everything that was going on, it just confused her. It also didn't help that he looked the way he did and as he took off his jacket, she saw that he was wearing a button down shirt with the sleeves folded up that made her insides twist.

Jackson handed her the bottle and stepped inside. He needed to clear his head, he was here with a goal and shouldn't really be surprised by how good she looked because come on, when didn't she? He let out a breath and followed her inside, willing himself to not let his eyes wander and failing. It had been a while since he had been here. Leaving was a rash decision but he was glad he made it, he couldn't shut her out of their home but he needed space. Looking back, he probably should have stuck with a hotel but he had booked one from tonight so better late than never. He watched her walk towards the kitchen to get glasses and he immediately followed to open the bottle, falling into old patterns easily.

"It smells great! Lasagna?" Small talk is good, Safe.

"Yeah. It was a tossup between turkey casserole and that, actually. But I decided to go with lasagna coz I found a new recipe and wanted to try it. Although I'm just realizing that we had pasta last night as well so I really hope you don't mind. I guess I could whip up something else in the meantime.." She wasn't sure why she rambling but there was a pit in her stomach, a nervousness that she hadn't felt around him in a while. She looked up and saw Jackson smirking, the infuriating smirk that made her want to kiss it right off. No. "What?" She asked defensively.

"You're rambling. That's what. April," A chill ran down her spine at the way her name rolled off his tongue and how his voice lowered, "Do you really think I mind having anything that you've made? Come on."

"Well, I thought I'd ask. I was being a nice host." April replied, shrugging.

"In my house?" Jackson said as a joke but immediately regretted it as he saw April freeze. Nice going, Idiot. "Hey.. I didn't mean.. "

"No, I know. It's fine." April was immediately taken back to that night. "It's my name on the lease, it's my place". But she shook it off, they didn't need to go down that path right now. She walked up to him, smiling slightly and started pouring the drink in their glasses. Jackson looked down at her, mentally kicking himself for his slip up. He needed this to be civil and he hoped that he hadn't messed it up already. He heard her sigh and suddenly realized how close she was. He could smell her perfume and his mind started going fuzzy. He looked away before she could look up at him and catch him staring.

"Dinner will take a few minutes. I hope you don't mind" She said, starting towards the couch. "Not at all." He followed her, mentally berating himself again for how he was acting. What are you, 16? Focus. He didn't know what had come over him tonight, this was April. Yeah, he loved her and yeah, he did want her but that was always the case except tonight it was hitting him hard. The last time they both were alone in this, their, apartment, he had been so fixated on his anger, the betrayal he felt that all of his base desires had taken a comfortable backseat.

Things were different now, they were in good, well, good enough, place and those desires seemed to be getting restless in that backseat. That, combined with all their memories associated with this house, suddenly made Jackson realize what he had gotten himself into. No. He was, in fact, not 16. He can have a dinner and a civil conversation without ripping off.. Stop! He audibly groaned while sitting down on the couch and April looked at him with curious eyes. He just smiled and shook his head, taking a sip. This was a good time, he decided. Dinner will take some time and all these confusing thoughts were not helping but once he brought up divorce, that would certainly be off the table. Yeah. This was it. He looked towards her and saw her lick wine off her lips and he swallowed hard.

Concentrating, he started, "So.. Uhh.. We should talk.". She looked up, taking a deep breath and putting her wine glass down, "Yeah. We should. Tell me." She looked at him with all her conviction, bracing herself. He took a beat and said, "Umm.. How.. How was work today?" Chicken. She narrowed her eyes at that.. "Jackson.." She always did see right through him. "What? I genuinely want to know.." CHICKEN!

April felt the fear settle in her stomach and now she was pretty sure that this was not heading anywhere good but if he needed time to get to it, she'll give it to him, it's not like she wants to hear those words anyway. "Umm.. Ok.." She actually had a pretty interesting day at work so she started telling him all about it but her mind was in a world of its own. He was confusing her tonight, she noticed the way he had been avoiding eye contact or how many times she caught him staring at, well, not-her-face and how his gaze darkened when they happened to lock eyes. Jackson knew what his proximity did to her but he was still making no efforts to hid his obvious attraction all the while trying to "talk", it was all too much for her head to handle.

She looked up at him and suddenly lost her (multiple) trains of thought, her stomach twisting in a mixture of fear and want and she involuntarily bit her lower lip. Jackson, who had been listening to her animated description of the Pit with a mild interest and a slight smile, noticed this and stiffened. The smile disappeared and his eyes caught hers with a primal look. She saw him lick his lips and his eyes falling to her lips and back. He made a slight movement towards her when the oven timer rang breaking them out of the spell.

April looked away first, flustered. "The uhh.. lasagna is probably done. I'll go check on it". She hurried away.

Jackson made sure that his eyes didn't follow April as she went towards the kitchen because he wasn't sure if would be able to keep himself from following her and giving in to the desire that had flooded him since he had come. He closed his eyes, trying to concentrate. He wasn't thinking straight. Not anymore. And was fairly certain that he wasn't in the right frame of mind to talk. New Plan. Eat dinner, smile politely, make an excuse, thank her and leave. He had lost faith in his will power and prolonging the stay here was just going to confuse him further. They weren't going anywhere, he can talk to her tomorrow, in a public place where he could control himself.

April grasped the kitchen counter and tried to get her breathing to regulate and heartbeat to slow down. What is going on?! This was her fault. Why did she have to do that? She couldn't seem to stop her head from going in that direction but this was not the time. Stop acting like a freaking schoolgirl!. She bent down to open the oven and remove the lasagna but was too distracted to put on the oven mitts and ended up touching the hot dish directly, "Owww! Crap." She pulled back immediately, running towards the freezer for some ice.

"What happened?" Jackson was pulled out his thoughts with April's voice. "Did you try to take out the lasagna from the oven without mitts? Isn't that like baking 101?" He asked, walking towards her, in a half concerned, half amused tone. "I uhh.. I was just... " She trailed off, not wanting to make eye contact. "Let me see." Jackson asked reaching for her hand. April was reluctant, he was too close and there was only so long she could stare at her hands before she had to look up at him and damn if his eyes didn't make her weak even after all this time.

"I hope you don't do this often" Jackson said taking her hand. "It happens from time to time, comes with the territory". April replied, still not looking at him. "Not a good territory then. Maybe you should stay away from oven-related cooking" He murmured, examining her hand. "It's fine. I love baking and if you love something, you should be prepared to get hurt sometimes." She meant it as a joke, to lighten things but didn't quiet assess how heavy that sounded in that moment. She felt him freeze and finally looked up to see him staring down at her hand. Jackson stopped his inspection and cleared his throat. "Uhh.. Well. It doesn't look too bad" "Yeah. It's not hurting or anything. Should be fine". She replied, stepping away.

She served them both and they sat at the table quietly. For a while, there were only sounds of them eating, neither knowing what to say and having a million things on their minds. Jackson decided to stick with his new plan. They were both clearly distracted tonight and not in the right frame of mind to discuss anything, he just needed to leave before things got more complicated. "This is delicious!" Back to small talk. "I love it!" April looked up, "Oh! Thank you!" She said, with a genuine smile, "Arizona suggested it. Said that it would and I quote 'Change my life'." She continued, laughing slightly. "I actually looked up the recipe for pumpkin ravioli. I knew I had to know how to make it. Thinking of trying it next week" She trailed off, needing to fill the silence. "Can't wait to try it!" Jackson replied, smiling, finishing off his lasagna. "Would you like some more?" April asked noticing him clean up but he shook his head, "Nah, I'm good. But it was amazing. Thanks."

They both walked out of the kitchen after cleaning up, Jackson's eyes betraying him yet again as they skimmed over April. She really did look amazing, the dress fitting her perfectly and not a hair out of place. He sighed, bringing himself back. Leave. "So, listen. I hate to dine and dash and I know we had to talk.. But I totally spaced and forgot that I have a really early surgery tomorrow that I have to get in and prep for so raincheck? If you're free tomorrow at lunch, maybe we can.." April knew he was lying and he knew that she knew it. But it was probably for the best that he left. The atmosphere was too charged to have a rational discussion and she was this close to jumping him as it is. She looked at him and smiled, "Yeah. I understand. I have a pretty free day tomorrow so we can get lunch."

Jackson picked up his jacket, wearing it as they started walking towards the door, not saying anything. He opened the door and looked back, "Thanks for dinner. It was perfect, as usual". She smiled at that, "Of course! Thanks for coming.". They stood awkwardly for a minute. What was the goodnight protocol for spouses-on-a-break? She looked up and saw him staring down earnestly. She knew she shouldn't do it, she should say Goodnight and let him go but she couldn't. It's not too bad, right? They hugged a few weeks ago and it was fine. She stepped towards him, arms opening up a bit.

He saw her stepping in for a hug and pulled her in immediately, just like always. He just wanted to be close to her for a minute. He could handle it. He shifted his head slightly while also taking in a deep breath and her smell filled his senses, overwhelming him. It hit him all at once. The shooting, the friendship, the first kiss, the first night, the want, the wedding, Samuel, April, April.

Fuck it.

Ok. I hope that the awkwardness and sexual tension came through. Also, I haven't decided how smutty (if at all) the next chapter will be. I've never written smut so I don't know if I'd be any good at it. Review :)