Cinderjuice

A Beetlejuice fanfic by Lady Norbert

Author's Notes: Of all the Cinderella quotes I've pilfered to use (or abuse) as chapter titles, this one is by far the most apt.

I hope it's clear that all my references to Tumblr where Prince Vince is concerned are meant to be affectionate. I love the site. I decided to let His Highness expound a bit in this chapter, since I thought you might enjoy his over-descriptions.

Chapter Sixteen: He Won't Rest Until He Finds Her

Prince Vince had known both Beetlejuice and Lydia for several years. His own early attraction to the young lady had never entirely diminished; however, in light of her gentle refusal of his offer of marriage, any hope of more than friendship with her had flickered and waned, like the light of a candle caught in an apologetic breeze. He remained nevertheless attached to both of them, particularly following their kind attempts to help him achieve rock stardom.

As Lydia had grown, the prince had watched the way her interactions with her spectral guardian had evolved. It was a matter of great curiosity to him, and in truth, he was quietly on the so-called shipping deck right alongside Donny and - if Mr. Monitor was to be believed - the rest of the Neitherworld. He'd seen enough of them together to know just how the story was supposed to go. Some of his poems on the subject (with their names carefully omitted of course) had received more than a thousand notes on Tumblr; this amused him, since it seemed to suggest that residents of the Outerworld were "shipping" it too.

Now, however, the story had taken a very dark and alarming turn. With Beetlejuice still trapped in human form, and Lydia very possibly in mortal peril, it was difficult to say how the happy ending could ever come to pass. Prince Vince didn't often believe in happy endings, really, just in endings; but he was too fond of his friends not to wish for a brighter resolution than the one which was currently in view.

Beetlejuice - or BJ, as he understood the human version was called - was in a state such as Prince Vince had never seen. This was perhaps only to be expected; after all, what had ever been more precious to him than that which was currently endangered? But his anger was so white-hot as to be almost imperceptible, simmering below the surface; he radiated a strange sort of calm, like the dearth of wind which precipitates a storm. The prince wondered if it was a side effect of his being human. The ghostly Beetlejuice, when angered, was a whirlwind of color and destruction, but this... this was entirely different.

"Okay, Doomeroo," BJ told his car, "we've gotta go find Lydia."

"Meep meep!"

"I don't know what's about to happen," he added grimly. "I might not survive this. But all I want you to focus on is getting Lyds as far away from the Fairy Godfather's castle as you possibly can. That's the most important thing. Got it?"

By way of reply, there came a series of distressed rumbles and grinding sounds. BJ rolled his eyes. "Fair enough, I'll ask. Prince Vince, he wants to know what they did to Pinky."

"The car Jacques was driving?"

"Yeah. She's Doomie's, uh... I dunno what you'd call it. Girlfriend? Wife?"

"Ah, I see. I had someone tow her to the local mechanic. It seems that our nemeses removed her spark plugs to keep her immobile, but she's otherwise unharmed."

"Meep meep meep!" was the grateful response. With this concern out of the way, Doomie revved his engine, ready to do his part to rescue his 'mother.' BJ hopped into the driver's seat, and Prince Vince joined Donny in the back.

"Have you got a plan, brother?" Donny inquired.

"Well, first we gotta get past the goons at the front gate," BJ mused. "Once we're inside, it becomes a question of where she is and what's being done to her." His hands gripped the steering wheel tightly.

"I think I can get us past the gate," Prince Vince mused. "Once we're inside, we should split up. I'll go speak with the Godfather; surely he must be able to see that what's being done here is wrong."

"I'll go with you, Beetlejuice," said Donny. "My magic's really nothing quite like yours, but I can at least offer you some protection."

"Guess I'll be needing that," he admitted.

To their surprise, however, the first obstacle - getting past Sonny and Fredo - proved to be no obstacle at all. The castle gate was open and abandoned. "Right, that's not at all suspicious," BJ muttered.

"It's a trap," Prince Vince agreed. "I'd guess they're waiting for you."

"Well, let's not disappoint them."

They left Doomie near the entrance and BJ stalked straight into the building, pushing up his sleeves and clenching his jaw. The other two followed, occasionally exchanging uneasy glances. The entrance hall was as abandoned as the exterior, and as BJ looked around, the prince thought he could almost see his mind working.

"Donny, never mind covering me - you figure out where they've stashed Jacques and Ginger. Prince Vince, you talk to the Godfather. I'll find Lyds." He smiled unpleasantly. "They want a show, do they? We'll give 'em a three-ring circus."

Before any argument could be offered against his going alone, the air was punctuated by a strange, shrill, cackling sort of laugh. "Speaking of the circus," BJ muttered, "we've got company."

Prince Vince had seen Scuzzo the Clown on previous occasions, knew vaguely who he was, and was mostly aware that he and Beetlejuice were rivals. This would certainly explain his involvement. "Ha! Beetlejerk!" he crowed, emerging from the shadows. "I can't believe you took the bait!"

"Where is she, Scuzzo?"

"Oh, this is gonna be great! You'll get up there right about the time they're doing the lobotomy!" Scuzzo did a sort of bizarre pirouette in clown shoes, twirling just out of BJ's reach. "And without your powers, there's nothing you can do to stop anyone! She'll be mincemeat by the time they're through!"

"I can still do one thing."

"Oh yeah? What's that?" The laughter was like the bleating of a deranged lamb.

"This." And with greater speed than Prince Vince would have thought possible, BJ closed the distance between himself and Scuzzo, drew back his right arm, and slammed his fist into the clown's face. No longer laughing, Scuzzo sailed across the room and hit the opposite wall, then fell to the ground.

"Hey! N-no fair, that's - that's mortal fighting!"

"Ow," BJ mumbled, shaking out his hand. But then he was running across the room, grabbing the bewildered pile of obnoxious dirtbag and hurling him into a corner. The quiet rage Prince Vince had observed earlier was gone; BJ's face was now a mask of unbridled fury, flushed and wild-eyed. He picked Scuzzo up and punched him again.

"Stop that!" howled the clown, kicking futilely. "This - this isn't - right! You don't - fight - like this!"

"Wanna bet?" BJ hissed. He threw one more punch, then glowered at the heap of clown which cowered at his feet.

Prince Vince glanced at Donny, who was staring in abject horror at his elder sibling. The prince couldn't blame him, really. Beetlejuice as a ghost could be, if he chose, genuinely terrifying - but he could rarely be bothered. The human form, however, with his oddly soft fleshy face and peculiarly pretty eyes, should never have looked as he did now. He pulsated with his anger, his eyes blazing, the mingled frenzy and fear radiating off of him.

Dimly, the prince recalled something one of his advisors had once told him about Beetlejuice. The Ghost With the Most possessed magic so powerful that, if he ever took it into his head to do so, he could conquer everything in his path without breaking a sweat. And even in his current depowered state, Prince Vince was pretty convinced that he could still pull it off. If they didn't find Lydia soon, BJ might just burn the entire Neitherworld to the ground with the fire of his unchecked emotions. Until he could see with his own eyes that she was safe... no one was.

"I'm not gonna ask again, Scuzzo. Tell me where she is!"