Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, or any of its characters.
Summary: Sometimes the choices we make lead us down a path we don't expect. She chose to leave his side, and he closed off his heart to the world. Now she is back, and he is the only one that can save her. Can he move past his pain to help her? Or will the consequences of their choices prove to be too much to bear?
Rating: T for language and alcoholism.
*Note, in response to a review: This story was previously posted on Dokuga under the same penname.
For three weeks, he avoided her. Before her discharge, he would only check on her when he knew she was either sleeping, or when Mina was with him. It just further proved he was a coward, but he couldn't bring himself to get close to her. He truly was pathetic.
Her Chemo therapy treatments began before she left the hospital, and would continue for the next six months. The surgery was not as successful as he would have liked, but with this level of advancement, complete removal is difficult. Still, she seemed to be responding to the Chemo. He held out hope. The shrill sound of his cell phone drew an annoyed grunt from Sesshomaru. It would seem everyday he grew to detest the invention of cell phones just a little more.
"Hello?" He asked irritably.
"Sesshomaru?" Panic seized him. Her voice was faint, weak, and he could tell by the elevated pitch that she was crying.
"Kagome? What is wrong?" His pulse quickened, and he felt sick to his stomach. The sound of heavy retching in the background nearly made him lose his breakfast. After a few moments, he heard her quiet sobs before her voice carried through a small distance.
"I don't… I don't know. Please help me…"
"Where are you?"
"At home."
"I will be right there. Stay with me okay?" He was out of his office, shouting a quick word to cancel his appointments to his confused assistant before he was hurrying out of the hospital. "Did you fall? Are you laying down?" He asked, trying to keep her talking as he tore out of the parking lot.
"Didn't fall, I'm laying on the bathroom floor though."
"I need you to sit up, can you do that?"
"My stomach hurts so bad. I need you."
"I know, I'm coming." He listened to her cry, listened to her vomit, listened to her beg for him, and each second that passed felt like an eternity. He needed to get to her. He fought down the pain in his heart, and blinked away the tears lining his eyes. He needed to be calm when he saw her, needed to be strong. Why the hell was there so much traffic? He took a calming breath. He forced the fury and fear from his mind and focused instead of listening to her breathing. It was erratic, but not alarmingly so.
"I'm so sorry." She murmured repeatedly. Sesshomaru merely shushed her, reaffirming that everything would be okay, that he was almost there. She continued to apologize and he wondered if she even registered his words. It was likely that she was feeling feint after losing so much of her stomach contents.
When he finally pulled up to her condo, he pulled into the first place he saw, not caring that it was labeled restricted. Let his car be towed, he did not care.
"I am here Kagome, can you let me in?" He asked gently. She murmured something that sounded like "can't get up" so Sesshomaru grabbed the gentleman at the security station. She lived in quite the building.
"I need access to Kagome Higurashi's unit, 603. I am her doctor."
"Sir, I can't just give you…" He covered the receiver, glaring at the officer. After a few choice words, the young man escorted Sesshomaru up to the unit with two others. When they opened the door the scent of vomit hung heavily on the air, and Kagome was propped against the wall, pale and sweaty. Dark circles hung beneath her eyes, and sweat clung to her body. Sesshomaru dropped his phone and knelt by her side, immediately checking over her. She felt warm to the touch.
"You came." She whispered weakly. Noticing the guards, she gave them a small smile. "Thank you for letting him in." Sesshomaru lifted her small frame, ignoring the security guards as they stuttered in confusion before leaving.
"When did you start vomiting?" She was so light in his arms, he tried not to think on it.
"About an hour, no a little more, before I called you." She was completely drenched in sweat, and the scent of vomit clung to her. He deposited her on the couch.
"Stay here, I will be right back." She nodded weakly. He went into the kitchen area and looked around for the items he needed. After securing a large pot, he filled it with lukewarm water. Browsing through the condo, he found a few towels and made his way back to her. He set the items down before lifting her up and sitting behind her. He situated her between his legs, her back pressed against his chest.
"You have a fever." He explained as he began to rinse her down. He placed a wet cloth on her head, then used a separate one to clean her face and neck, lingering in places to help cool the flesh. Though normally the nurses were the ones charged with giving sponge baths, it had been something he had been forced to learn while attending university.
"Tell me about the Olympics." He said, hoping to keep her conscious. If she grew any worse, he would be forced to take her to the hospital.
"Mama would have been so happy." Her throat was raw, but he could hear a bit of strength returning. "She would have loved it. They had food from every country. You know how much Mama loved trying new foods when she could." He could hear the smile in her tone.
"Especially Italian." He felt a smile come to his own face, despite the situation. Her mother had always told him that the only person she would allow her daughter to marry would be him, or an Italian who could cook.
"They had cannoli's. I ate so many." He snorted at that, well aware of just how much she could pack away.
"Now that, I do not doubt." He heard her breathing pick up slightly, and he readied a bowl beside her. As her body tensed, he leaned her forward as she regurgitated again. With his free hand he brushed her hair from her face. The lack of substance in the bowl alerted him to the fact that she had exhausted her stomach contents, and only bile remained.
"Kagome, we need to get you…"
"No!" She whispered fiercely, leaning her head back against his chest. "I'm sorry, just please let me stay like this? Just for a little while?" He could feel her heart beating wildly, but he knew how stubborn she was.
"Where is your phone?" She motioned to her pocket and he pulled it out. "I will call for an ambul…"
"But…"
"We can stay like this until they get here." He promised, his arms coming about her. He heard her sigh and felt her body relax.
The atmosphere grew quiet and somewhat relaxed, and Sesshomaru was left with his thoughts. Seeing her so sick, so fragile drove home the reality of her situation. It was likely her body was rejecting the chemo, and a different regimen would need to be worked. The fear in his heart grew. What if they didn't work? What if she did not make it? His arms tightened around her, and he felt her head nuzzle into his chest.
"I'm okay." She soothed. An influx of emotion swept through him. She always thought of others, never of herself. She always tried to protect everyone else. She was comforting him when she was the one sick, the one fighting a deadly disease. He wanted to scoff, wanted to scold her, wanted to do so many things to express the war within him. But he couldn't. He lowered his head to rest upon hers and hugged her tighter. He couldn't do anything.
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Love, Caleesci