Mara woke about fifteen minutes later, feeling a hand on her face. She opened her eyes and smiled to see Duke looking back a her, his hand still against her face. "I didn't mean to wake you. I'm sorry."
"Don't be silly," she murmured, trying to shake off the drowsiness, "I was just waiting for you to wake up. You look good and your scans are clean. How do you feel?"
"Tired. All that time on a beach, I thought I'd be all rested up. But I'm exhausted. I feel okay otherwise. My chest feels bruised."
She pushed herself up, checking his temperature. "That's because when we stepped out of the Void we fell, and I landed on you. The size of me, you're lucky I didn't squash you."
He grinned at her. "You look beautiful. I had no idea how sexy a pregnant woman could look. Will you tell me everything now? Please, Mara? I need to know."
"Fine, but if you start getting worked up, I'm giving you a shot to keep you calm. You've been through a lot today, you need to let yourself heal and acclimate."
"I promise I'll be a good patient. Now tell me what happened to you, since I'm assuming that's first."
Her arms were already showing and he didn't look repulsed. She took his hand, lacing her fingers with his. "Momma wasn't trying to join us. She used a teleportation that's not meant to be used on living creatures. It sent me to one of her labs, in Mexico. I was a mess. I found enough Aether in her lab to make myself look presentable and to speed healing to the rest of my body, but the Aether stopped working about a month ago. I stopped healing. This is what I look like now. I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry? You're beautiful. I'm sorry I didn't realize, that I wasn't there to help you."
"No, please don't say that. I'm glad you weren't there, that you didn't have to be there for that."
"Are you in pain?"
"My skin is very sensitive. It seems more manageable with you here. Gloria gave me better pain medication and I've learned a lot of coping skills. I'm okay." She desperately wanted to see if Duke's touch would hurt her, but she was afraid of the answer.
"Can you show me? Show me what happened to you?"
"Duke, you don't need that picture in your head. I'm here in front of you, you can see me just fine."
His eyes looked sad and old. "I need to know, Mara. I need to know what was happening to you when I ran off."
She chewed her lip, staring at him. Finally, she rolled onto her back, reaching for her medical kit and getting the syringe with the Valium. "Do you want the medication first or do you want to see how you do? I'm telling you, it wasn't pretty, but there was nothing you could have done. Not a damn thing."
"If I need the shot after, fine. Just show me."
Sighing, she raised her hand to show Duke the same image she's shared with Audrey- her distorted, black and red body jerking across the floor of the lab, trying to reach the box of Aether. She heard Duke's harsh inhalation, but he didn't gag. She'd take what she could get.
"After I could walk, I started trying to get home. I hitchhiked all the way here."
"You- you hitched across the country? You're tiny! You're probably a serial killer's dream come true! Did anyone hurt you? You tell me who and I'll hunt them down, I swear."
"Ah, death threats. And I thought the age of chivalry had passed. I'm smaller than you're used to, not weaker. Nobody hurt me. A couple clumsy propositions and one guy got a broken nose. It was the families and the religious nuts who were bad. I almost tucked and rolled when one family started singing hymns. Instead I started screaming that it burned my skin and pretended I was possessed." She smiled at the memory. "That was the best one. They tried to exorcise me in the van, and I played along, said all kinds of crazy shit. I figure at least they have a good story. Once they chased the 'demon' away they took me all the way through Utah. They might have driven me all the way to Maine, but I had to get out of there."
"What about the guy with the broken nose?"
"He touched my leg. I don't let other people touch me."
"Because of the pain?"
"Not entirely. Because they aren't you."
"Can I touch you?"
Her heart was pounding like a freight train. "I really wish you would."
Duke reached for her, gathering Mara to his bare chest. As her skin registered his touch, she couldn't help the sob that came from her mouth.
"Am I hurting you?"
Mara wrapped her arms around his back, pressing against his skin. "No, no. Duke, your touch doesn't hurt!" The tears fell like rain, and he was kissing her, every ounce of stress and fear pouring between them until it was cleaned- safe and sparking and full of hope.
"I don't understand," she breathed. "Everything and everyone else but James has hurt me. I don't-"
"Did you say James?"
Oh hell. She hadn't meant to say that.
"Yeah. I did. I guess it's time to tell you the rest. I'm giving you the shot now. It won't knock you out, but it will make everything easier to process. Because I know- I know how hard this is, and I felt the same way you will. Just remember it's over and fixed. You're home, Everyone is together." She injected the syringe into the port of his IV, scooting back into his arms and waiting til his face relaxed.
"Okay, Mara. Hit me with your best shot."
"When I crossed the border into Maine, I called the PD. I was trying to get Audrey. Laverne didn't know who I was, obviously, but she told me that Vince and Dave were dead. That you were dead. That Audrey was dead. I was so- I threw up. I was too late and I'd lost everyone because I got stupid.
"After you died, Vince and my father went into the Barn. But the Troubles didn't stop, Duke. So Audrey went too. Nathan was alone for a month before Paige drove into town with her baby son James in the car. They sent her back as someone else, giving Nathan his son but stealing his partner, and they... they rewrote James's DNA. Took me out of him and replaced me with Audrey. I fixed her though, Duke. I fixed her as soon as I possibly could. She's okay."
"You- are you shitting me right now? They took Audrey? What was the point, Mara? What was my sacrifice for? Oh Jesus, I asked Nate to kill me and it solved nothing." She was glad she'd given him the shot. His body was trying to get worked up, but the Valium was doing it's job.
"Duke, I don't think that's ever what it was supposed to be. I think they wanted you out of the way so you didn't screw up their plans. You were the only real line of defense this town and all the Troubled citizens had. You had powers they didn't understand and couldn't make work for them. They wouldn't have been able to use you, no more than the Rev was able to use you. So they tricked you into removing yourself from the equation.
"I worry about Nathan too. It's why I convinced him to let me bury the memory, the vision of killing you. I told you that Gloria gave me the boat and your car. The first night I slept here, when Nathan didn't know I was here yet, he showed up. He was sleeping here. Duke, when he realized who I was, he hugged me. He was happy to see me even before I told him I could bring Audrey back."
Duke held her closer, winding his fingers in her hair. He whined in his throat as he got caught in her braid and she laughed, pulling it over her shoulder to pull the elastic out and pull the strands loose.
"Better." He ran his fingers through her hair, relaxing a little. "He was sleeping here? Why?"
"Same reason I was. To feel close to you. He was having nightmares every night. He tried to scrub the tattoo off when he couldn't get a laser removal place fast enough. The first night I was here, I told him to stay. We slept in your bed, and he held my hand. Can you imagine how hurt he would have to be to be so desperate he would sleep holding my hand?"
Voice hoarse with tears, Duke whispered, "Do you really think so? You don't think he blames me?"
"Oh baby, of course not. He blames himself. To be honest, I understand. You guys were gone, and everything that was left, it all felt like punishment. For me and for Nathan both. They took you, they took Audrey, we lost the Teagues brothers. Momma hurt me enough to keep me out of the way until she could get rid of you because she knew that I wouldn't allow all of this to happen. She took my father from me and made it look like I was dead so he would attack this place. She took me out of James to destroy the only tie between me and Nathan. Giving him to Paige, sending her back like that, it was offensive. He couldn't admit that he was James's father, she could never be his partner and she worked so hard to make herself real. Nathan couldn't just hold her and cry, he was trying to make her comfortable. He had no room to grieve."
"You sound like you understand. You've said a lot about Nathan, but what about you?"
Mara traced shapes over Duke's heart with one finger as they talked. "I do understand, but in a different way. Nathan blamed himself for killing you and for letting Audrey go. I blame myself for being so weak and shallow and vain that I got here late. Six weeks, Duke. I was in that lab for six weeks, teaching myself to walk and fixing my face. I should have gotten a wheelchair and left immediately. I hate that Nathan had to suffer like that. Whatever they wanted to do to me, I could bear it, but not the rest of you. When you were gone and I realized James was the only one whose touch didn't hurt me, it was just more obvious. If I have to lose him to give him a chance at life, fine- but not to a fake personality. It's hard enough just having him be Audrey's. I couldn't tolerate calling her Paige, seeing her hair, listening to her parrot the story of when I gave birth to him."
She bit her tongue. "I'm sorry. I'm supposed to be nursing you, not whining at you. How are you feeling?"
Duke rolled on his side to face her, one hand in her hair, the other on her belly. The baby was moving as usual, and a sweet smile was on his face. "Right now? I'm feeling really, really lucky. I hate that I missed out of the rest of the pregnancy, I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you when you got hurt. But you came for me. You loved me enough to bring me back. You helped Audrey and Nathan. After everything that happened, you're so focused on helping us. It makes me feel... loved."
"I do love you. If all the pain of the last few months teaches you just that, all by itself, then it was worth it."
Their lips met, both hesitant and afraid of hurting the other, but soon emotion and need took over, and Duke was pulling away from her neck to pull her shirt off, returning immediately to kiss her damaged skin like she was the most beautiful creature in the world. She was unbuttoning his cutoff shorts as he pulled her leggings and panties off.
It was like magic. As she stretched out against him, the planes of their bodies pressed tightly together, and wherever his skin met hers, there was no pain, only the joy of reunion. She straddled him, admiring the tone of his skin and his long hair against the blankets as she rubbed herself against him, feeling him harden under her, his hushed groans giving her goosebumps. She pressed her hands to his chest, her nails digging slightly into his skin. Duke groaned loudly, and Mara giggled as she shushed him, whispering, "Shh! If they don't think you're sleeping, they'll come looking."
His answering grin was wicked and his teeth shone brilliant white in his tanned face. "Well, we better give them a good show, huh?" Gripping her hips, he lifted her her so that she could sink down around him, and her head fell back with a long moan. When she started moving, his hands stroked up her sides, his long, graceful fingers trailing over the curve of her belly to her breasts, swollen and sensitive from the hormones. When he squeezed, Mara ground down on him, her nails pressing harder into his chest as she rocked against him.
"Duke, I can't- it's been so long and I missed you so much. I don't think I can go slow."
His hands trailed back down to her hips, gripping her as he whispered, "Then don't. I want to see you. You're so fucking beautiful."
His words made her shiver and she responded, rocking and squeezing him as her movement grew more desperate and frenzied. Her hair fell around them and Duke was staring at her, stroking her hair and her body like she was the only woman on the planet, like she was a work of art. It made her want to cry, but her breath was coming faster, the light around them fading as she fought to breathe, leaning forward and biting his chest to muffle her hushed, breathless cry.
Duke growled, wrapping his arms around her and rolling them over, wrestling his IV tubing out of her hair. Mara giggled quietly and Duke focused on her face, thrusting deep and cutting off her laugh. He grinned down at her, his hair hanging into his face, kissing her as he pushed into her again and again, making up for all the nights apart, all the times she should have just said 'I love you' and every foolish missed opportunity.
Mara met every thrust and every kiss with more enthusiasm, adjusting happily to his own desperate, punishing rhythm. His hair brushed her face as he kissed her, smiling triumphantly as she wailed and clenched around him again, leaving long scratches on his shoulders.
Duke changed the rhythm, pushing into her exquisitely slowly, staring intently into her eyes. "I missed you. I missed you every second of every day. I wanted you back and now I'm not letting go. I'm glad you're pregnant. I'm- I'm beyond glad, I'm fucking thrilled. I'm going to make everything up to you."
She brought both hands to his face, squeezing her legs around him. "Nothing to make up. I just want a future with you."
He thrust harder, making her back arch. "You mean that?"
"Of course I do." She caught her breath, nails piercing his skin as he thrust again, eyes on her lips.
"Prove it. Marry me."
Her own question answered. No, he would never stop surprising her. He hit a particularly sweet spot and her back arched again while she gasped his name. "Are you serious?"
He tilted his hips, changing the angle as he pushed forward. "Completely serious. Prove you want me. Make it official."
"Yes, yes, anything you want, Duke. As long as you're with me, I'm yours."
His grin was breathtaking and he nuzzled his face against her throat, nibbling her neck as he made love to her, her entire body shaking with his thrusts. She bit his lips when he kissed her and his deep, throaty moans picked up, making her tighten harder around him. She wrapped a hand around the back of his neck, pulling his face close so she could kiss him harder, legs tightening and hips raising as she keened into his arm at the sound of him gasping and moaning her name.
Her eyes slipped closed and her muscles relaxed as the warmth of him seeped through her. He kissed her languorously as he pulled out and lay next to her, gathering her into his arms as he wrestled with his IV line again. They just lay sprawled together for several minutes, catching their breath.
"I feel like I'm dreaming," Duke whispered, staring at the ceiling.
"Hmm. You're not that creative."
"You're not kidding. I can't believe we're going to have a kid."
"Do you have any idea how many people are rolling in their graves right now?"
"What do you mean?"
"The last Crocker breeding with the 'Creator of the Troubles'. Imagine what the Rev and Simon would say."
He tilted his head and a wide smile crossed his face as he though about it. "Double bonus."
Mara laughed. "Audrey and Nathan want to see you. I'm surprised they've waited this long. I had to chase Nathan away from the bedside. And I swore I would tell Gloria as soon as you were safe. Oh, and I have food for you. Made you dinner."
"Alright, alright. Do we get more naked time later?"
"As much as you want." She kissed Duke's chest and stood, pulling on her pirate boxers and satin chemise before turning to brush her hair. "How are you feeling? You want to keep the IV for awhile?"
"I feel great. Unhook me, doc."
She smiled as she untaped and removed the needle from his arm. "Settling the natives and then shower?"
He perked up at that. "A shower sounds amazing. I feel all sandy."
Mara grinned. "That's because you are all sandy. I'll brush off the bed and vacuum, make sure it didn't get in the sheets. You want to see them first? Then you can shower and your dinner should be ready."
"Damn, woman. You're spoiling me."
She threw him the satin robe she'd been wearing and he just stared at her, dumbfounded. "Get dressed, Duke."
"I am not wearing your robe."
She rolled her eyes at him. "It's not my robe, I stole it from your closet."
He held it up to look at it and blushed. "Oh. Right. I picked this up in Asia."
"And I'm sure you look very, very pretty in it. Get dressed."
"Wait, you want me to wear this to see Audrey and Nate?"
"No need to get a whole new outfit dirty when you're just going to shower before dinner."
Duke glared at her and Mara smiled innocently. He finally raised his chin. "You just think I won't do it. Fine." He stood up, head high as he slipped the black robe on, the gold flowers standing out proudly.
She grinned again. "You do look pretty."
"Yes, yes I do."
"Now lay down. You get to visit, but you need to rest."
"That's not what you were saying ten minutes ago."
"You were horizontal the entire time."
"You're really, really hard to argue with."
She leaned down to kiss him. "Then don't try. I'll get you a drink and let the others know they can come in."
Mara was still smiling brightly when she came into the living room. "He's awake, up to speed and ready for visitors. I'm just going to grab him a drink." She got Duke a bottle of maple water, finally noticing that Audrey was staring at her. "What? What's that look for?"
"He doesn't hurt you, does he?"
"How did you know?"
"I can just tell. I'm happy for you."
"I'm happy too. Come, bring the baby. He's excited to see you, Audrey."
Nathan beat them in, rushing toward the bed where Duke was sitting up and wrapping his arms around Duke, squeezing too hard even with his feeling back. He was breathing hard, hands shaking and tears rolled down Duke's neck from Nathan's eyes. Nathan just held Duke for several minutes, not moving or speaking, just holding each other while Nathan cried.
"Hey, Nate, it's okay. Everything is okay."
"But it wasn't. Oh god, I was sure it would never be okay again. I'm sorry, Duke. I'm so sorry. I messed up so bad, and you were just gone. Everyone was gone." Nathan sounded so heartbroken, Duke gazed up at Mara in shock as he returned Nathan's hug.
"You did what I asked you to do. I begged you, Nate. I'm sorry you're hurting and I'm sorry it didn't change anything. I wanted things to be better for you. I had no idea Audrey would still..."
"None of us did, Duke. Nothing happened the way it was supposed to. All I could do was watch her walk away and I thought it would kill me. The days passed without you and then this car breaks down, Duke, and it was her. But It wasn't her. She didn't know me. Didn't know you. She was a teacher and it was so... she acted like her and she talked like her, said the same things even, and it was so wrong. But there was nobody to talk to about it. I worked so hard to chase you away and then you were gone and all I wanted was to have you back."
"Nate, stop. I'm not mad, I'm the one who asked you for help. You helped me, you saved me."
Nathan took a rattling breath, sitting back but keeping one hand around the back of Duke's neck, the other on his shoulder. "You say I saved you, but Duke, I've seen it both ways, and I just... I don't want to live in a world without you. I'm sorry I never told you how much I appreciate you. I was wrong and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry about everything. I should have listened to you before, too. You were right. She would have helped Audrey. I could have saved us all so much." He looked stunned and sick as a thought hit him. "If I had asked you to heal Audrey, you never would have tried the whole 'joining'. She couldn't have dispersed you, Mara. I'm the reason you're hurt."
Mara moved closer as Audrey squeezed in to hug Duke. "No, Nathan. Stop that. The only one who's to blame for hurting me is my mother. I know you didn't like me, but you would never have hurt me like that and I know it. I knew it then! I knew it was safe to needle you and irritate you, that you wouldn't hurt me. I knew that even when I was tormenting you. Don't even try taking the blame for what happened to me.
"Nathan, you and I keep finding ourselves in these different roles. Lovers as Sarah, adversaries when I first came forward. We've worked together a little, but we usually seem to work against each other. I know that personally, I would like to try being your friend. Maybe even your sister if you want to go that far. Let's learn how to work together in a healthy way. We already know we're great at tearing each other down. Let's see how we do at boosting each other up."
His jaw was tight, fighting tears, and his nose was red but he said, "Do you mean that?"
She huffed a laugh. "I can't really lie to you, can I?"
Nathan chuckled too, wiping his eyes. "We haven't really tested that. Maybe it's me that can't lie to you."
"A girl can dream. How would you test that, though? Tell one true secret and one lie and see if we can tell?"
Duke looked at Audrey curiously, but she grinned and held up a finger, one arm still around Duke. Nathan and Mara quietly sized each other up, forgetting their audience. Nathan said, "I use women's shampoo and I secretly like the BeeGee's."
Mara scoffed. "I already know you use Audrey's shampoo and you like Elton John. Not the BeeGee's. Do something I don't know."
Nathan furrowed his brow, thinking. "I have never lost at cards to Duke and I know it was your choice not to kill me after you shot me, not Audrey's."
She froze, staring at him with narrowed eyes. "I know you've lost at cards to Duke. Everyone has, because he cheats. When did you realize it was me?"
Duke cleared his throat. "Mara, he's never lost to me. The few times he's agreed to play, I've always agreed to play fair."
Oh hell. She's gotten the answer wrong and now they knew a secret.
"It really was your choice?" Nathan's voice was stunned.
"Yeah, it was." She looked at her fingernails like they were fascinating. "Audrey was still asleep for that. But you're no good at this. How about... I love your Bronco and I think your eyes are your best feature?"
His head tilted. "What's my best feature, then?"
Mara sighed, shaking her head. "I knew I wasn't going to be lucky enough to magically tell when Nathan was lying."
"You haven't answered me." Nathan pointed out.
Rolling her eyes, Mara pouted and shifted uncomfortably. "Your smile. Sometimes your eyes are very sad, but your smile is contagious. So! We've answered that question, so I reiterate that I want to be working with you, not against you, and you'd know if I was lying."
A smile continued to grow on Nathan's face when Duke said, "Wait a minute, why can Mara suddenly not lie to Nathan?"
"Right. You missed that part. It's my own fault. I told you, I lost it when I found everything out, I was furious and sad and scared. You dead and Audrey replaced, and then I found out about James... I was hurting, I was angry and heartbroken that they'd even taken my son, the one thing that connected me to Nathan. I was grieving and I was lonely. Somehow, the feelings that had connected me to Nathan and my son, once that child didn't really exist anymore they rewired themselves. It created a one-sided bond between me and Nathan. You hit him, you hit me. You shoot him, you shoot me."
Duke was pale. "Oh man. I'm really glad you told me before I actually hit Nate for something! Don't look so embarrassed, Mara. It doesn't bother me. I mean, I wish Nathan wasn't such a danger magnet, but I'm not mad or anything. Why is the bond one-sided?"
"Because it was my own, unrequited feelings that forged the bond in the first place. Nathan didn't have those feelings for me so there was nothing to forge a bond, no reason to." Nathan reached out to stroke Mara's hair and she smiled back at him. "At least now we'll know when Nathan is in trouble. We'll shut up so you can talk to Audrey."
Duke tucked Audrey's hair behind her ears. "You went into the Barn."
She was gazing at Duke. "You died. The Troubles didn't stop. So to me, the only way to make your sacrifice worthwhile was to finish what we started. Stop the Troubles."
"I get it, I do. Doesn't mean I like it." He wrapped his arms around her again, and Audrey hugged him around the neck.
"I have something for you, Duke." She reached under her shirt, pulling the necklace out. "I gave this to Nathan before I went into the Barn. He gave it back to me, and now I'm putting it back where it belongs." She slid the chain over Duke's head, the whistle resting in it's spot against his chest.
"Thank you, Audrey. No more running. No giving up or sacrificing. Obviously it doesn't work. So let's not do it anymore."
Audrey laughed through her tears, hugging Duke tightly again. "You got it."
Mara snuck back out to the kitchen, grabbing her phone to call Gloria.
"Mara! Did you go? I've been so anxious all day, but I didn't want to interrupt. What happened?"
Mara removed the foil from the tray in the oven so the top could brown. "He's home, Gloria. He's healthy and well, just very tired. He's talking to Nathan and Audrey, but then he needs to shower and eat a real dinner. I promised I'd bring him home. Promises are serious."
Gloria stopped the tears long enough to hiccup, "Thank you so much. Every day felt like a year. Outliving my sons, it's the worst thing I've ever... you're sure he's okay? Did you need to use the kit?"
"I ran an IV, gave him the antibiotics and I did force the Valium on him. It was a good choice, he was very, very worked up. But he looks wonderful. Healthy and tan and his hair is all grown out. He's perfect."
"When will he be ready for company?"
Gloria's desperation was palpable and Mara didn't have the heart to make her wait. "I'm sure we would all like it if you joined us for dinner. Come by in about an hour? That'll give him time to shower."
"Is there anything I can bring? Does Duke need any other medications? Do you? Do you have enough of the pain medication?"
"The bottle you gave me is huge. I have enough for at least a couple of weeks, but thank you. Duke seems to be well controlled with the things we already have, so just you, I think."
"Thank you, angel. Thank you for everything."
"We'll see you soon." Mara hung up before she could get teary.