Chapter 18
Allen walked into his sons' room and turned on the light. They moaned and turned over, hiding their heads under their pillows.
Allen sighed and pulled their sheets off them.
The two moaned.
Alice ran in and jumped on Aaron's bed giggling. She was such a morning person.
Allen folded the sheets and set them in a box, "Come on, you can sleep on the train."
"Train?" The two asked in unison, completely awake now. "We are riding a train?" They asked excited.
Allen laughed." Yep."
The two dressed quickly and ran to the door. "Hurry up Dad!"
Allen shook his head and smiled.
Lenalee let some finders in to help carry some of the Walker family's luggage.
Everyone grabbed a bag, besides the kids and walked to the train station.
Allen constantly made sure that all his children were accounted for, making sure that they held hands.
They boarded the train and sat down in a private cabin.
Aaron, Rin, and Alice ran to the window, claiming the window seats.
Allen smiled and sat next to Alice and gently brushed her long black hair and braided it as they waited.
The train stopped at their station and they exited, leaving the finders to grab everything.
Allen picked up Alice and held Rin's hand as they walked.
Rin marveled at how big the Order was. "We are going to live here?"
Allen chuckled. "Yes, this was my home before you three were born."
"Wow." Rin whispered.
They walked inside and were greeted by Komui.
"Hello! Well you have grown up Allen." Komui said shaking Allen's hand.
Allen let go of Rin to shake hands. "Thanks."
"Your children are beautiful." Komui said smiling at Alice, a little curious about her eye patch. "What is your name sweetie?"
Alice buried her face into her dad's shirt.
"Alice, this is my big brother." Lenalee said. "He won't hurt you. He is nice, like Rin and Aaron."
Alice looked at Komui.
"What's your name?" Komui repeated.
"Alice Walker." She whispered.
"Alice is a pretty name. Alice, I am a friend of your father's, my name is Komui Lee. Lenalee is my little sister."
Alice smiled softly.
Aaron looked up at Komui with an uninterested look on his face.
"Hello. What is your name?" Komui asked and smiled.
"Aaron, Aaron Walker." Aaron answered and crossed his arms.
"Are you the man of the house?"
Aaron nodded.
Komui chuckled and looked at Rin. "And your name?"
"Rin Walker. You have a funny hat mister." Rin grinned a toothy grin.
"Rin!" Allen scolded.
"It's alright. He's just a child. No harm done."
"But still." Allen gave Rin a look that said 'we will talk later'. "It's nice to be back after so long."
Komui handed Allen a key. "Go check out your family's room."
"I will." Allen smiled.
"One more thing, tomorrow, after breakfast I want to see you and your kids in my office for a simple check-up."
Allen nodded. "Alright, good night." Allen walked with his family to the room and unlocked it.
The room was like an apartment. It had a living room area and a mini kitchen area.
Aaron ran with Rin to explore their room. "Dad! There are 4 rooms! Do we get to choose which is ours?" Aaron asked.
"I call the big one!" Rin claimed.
"No! Daddy gets the big room!" Alice argued and squirmed in Allen's arms.
Allen set her down and she ran off after the boys.
Allen looked around and gently touched the white counters, this was not what he was expecting.
"Do you think this is big enough?"
Allen turned to Lenalee. "This is perfect." He whispered, touching a banister.
Lenalee smiled. "You didn't think we would put you back in your old room, did you?"
"I actually did." Allen smiled sadly.
"Allen, sit down." Lenalee ordered.
"Am I in trouble?" Allen smiled.
"Actually, you are."
"What's wrong?" Allen asked as he sat down on the white couch.
"Stop beating yourself up."
"I'm not."
"Don't lie to me."
Allen looked away; he didn't want to talk about this.
"What is bothering you?"
"Nothing."
Lenalee raised an eyebrow. "You are feeling sorry for yourself. Just talk to me. You need to vent Allen, you shouldn't just hold it all in. You've been holding things in your whole life. Are you ashamed of what happened almost 6 years ago?"
"No, I could never be upset about them. They are the best thing that ever happened to me." Tears crept into Allen's eyes.
"Then what Allen?" Lenalee pried.
"I was never going to do it. I swear, but it was on my thoughts all the time."
"What Allen?"
"I was depressed; Johnny had me on antidepressants when I was pregnant with the triplets. But the pills did nothing for me. I felt so betrayed, violated, and hurt knowing that my 'Best Friends' had down this to me." Allen paused; he didn't want to finish his story.
"Allen, what did you do?"
"I wanted to die." He whispered, tears flowing down his cheeks.
Lenalee's eyes widened. "You didn't try to... kill yourself, right?"
Allen nodded. "I wanted to die, to be put off my misery sounded much better to me than living with all those thoughts and memories. I never told anyone about anything. I want all of my suicidal thoughts to forever remain a secret."
"I will take your secret to the grave with me." Lenalee promised.
Alice walked in. "Daddy? Why are you crying? Do you have an ouchie?"
"Come here Sweetheart." Allen said and wiped his eyes.
She jumped into his lap and hugged him.
Allen hugged her back and stroked her black hair.
"I'm guessing that you are happy that you never did it?" Lenalee smiled.
Allen nodded.
"Did what Daddy?"
"Nothing." Allen gently kissed his daughter's forehead before turning to Lenalee. "I thank God every day for stopping me." Allen admitted and hugged his daughter.
