Author's Business
Sorry that I'm bound to disappoint all of you who expected another chapter, but this has been weighing heavily on my mind for quite a while now, and I think now I finally should speak up on my own behalf and on the behalf of all the other authors who, like me, put a lot of time and effort in their works.
Honestly I don't know what's wrong with the Coldfire fandom. Admittedly it's a small one, but evidently there ARE some readers around, a fact that's proven every now and then when I get another chiding review. Unfortunately I'm rarely graced with positive ones at all with the exception of fellow author Silvereyedbitch and one of Herdcat (thanks a lot), and it's starting to get at me. Seriously. What's the point in doing something which gets next to no positive feedback at all but just serves to raise other people's hackles? It doesn't make sense at all, does it?
First of all I'd like to refer to the accusation that I 'stole' the idea of Damien becoming Head Physician from Shadowy Star. Dear fellow author, I deeply admire your work, and if I offended you I apologize. Deeply. Notwithstanding I think that this insinuation is bordering on the ridiculous. I mean, come on, Damien always treasured his healing skills. It's in his nature to care for others, and the thought of him staying in the healing business after the loss of the fae and rising up to a high position isn't that far fetched as far as I'm concerned. The idea just suggests itself, and if my powers of imagination were that underdeveloped that I had to steal it from another author maybe I should quit writing altogether. I didn't even remember that Shadowy Star had the same idea before, by the way. Fortunately there are over two hundred Coldfire fanfics floating around the web by now, and although I'm not daft I can't memorize everything (longs for Gerald's brilliant brains...).
That said I'm a bit bewildered concerning the second part of the review. 'You overdo the flashbacks. They're very nice and give a great insight in what's to happen in the end but the whole thing just doesn't flow well.' Excuse me? Dear Dragoness Anna, I somehow accept that it's meant to be constructive criticism, but it's not exactly what I would call helpful or even logical. Sorry for being so outspoken, but for me it just doesn't make sense. Of course there are several flashbacks; after all I wanted to highlight a time span of about twenty years. Maybe the 'flow' could indeed have been more proficiently executed, but everybody should keep in mind that when I landed in the Coldfire fandom I had never written anything fictional before (okay, except the miserable heartache poems one tends to produce at the age of fourteen, lol). I'm really trying to do my best, but apparently it's never enough. Sigh!
What really annoyed me was the reviewer not long ago who pointed out that she 'even' liked some of my stories but didn't bother to review one single time before she felt obliged to criticize me. Not to mention that I found the use of the word 'even' very condescending I think that kind of behaviour is quite strange. Why not making an author happy with a few kind words but finding the time for however well-deserved criticism? I just don't get it.
Well, having said that I have to admit that for the time being I've had had it. Over the last months I had to digest that I bore the shit out of everybody with my author's notes, my grammar sucks, I'm a thief, all the good writers have sadly disappeared from the Coldfire fandom (a true effrontery with regard to those fellow-authors still trying to keep the fandom going) and so on and so forth. It's not very encouraging, mildly put, and meanwhile dreading to read my reviews I'm seriously considering giving up for good once again. Somehow it's a pity because I enjoy writing very much and I still harbour the hope that there's one or the other reader out there who likes reading about Damien and Gerald however measly my writing skills are. I truly don't know yet.
A fellow author once warned me not to post something while still foaming at the mouth, but I just had to get this off my chest. It's not going to make me popular here, I know that very well, but sometimes you just have to 'face it all, stand tall and do it your way' (stolen from the famous song 'My Way'). Ah well, got me here, Frankie Boy. 'Doing it my way' would mean going on however adverse the circumstances, wouldn't it?
Whoever had the patience to read my ramblings: I hope you forgive me being frank, but some things just have to be said. Yours sincerely,
Hobgoblin
