Whispers of What We Were
Chapter 7
Seven Years Ago...
"You be good for Grandma ok Em?" Tara asked her two year old daughter, "I'll be back next week baby."
"No momma! You stay!"
At her two year old pleading words, tears started to form in Tara's eyes. Abel, at nine months, didn't understand what was really happening and was quite content with his bottle Gemma was giving him. Emily on the other hand, was beginning to realize that when Tara had luggage, she would be gone for a long time, and was getting really good at throwing tantrums.
Jax put a hand on Tara back, reassuring her. He bent down to pick up Emily. "Little one; Mommy has to go to school so she can become a famous doctor. Don't you want Mommy to be a doctor?"
"No!" Emily shouted, burying her face in the crook of her father's neck.
"You go babe. She'll be fine." Jax said to Tara.
"Yeah... ok." Tara was really beginning to re-think the whole leaving her family behind while finishing school in San Diego thing. She gave Jax a kiss then placed one on the top of Emily's head. "I love you guys." Then she went to Gemma, "thanks again Gemma." She said, giving Abel a kiss on his chubby cheek.
"No problem baby. You better come back with perfect scores on those exams." Gemma said.
"I will." She had better get the best possible grades. Something good had to come out of all the heart ache she felt when she left her kids and Jax behind.
SOASOASOASOA
Tara shut the trunk and was not surprised by Jax's cool gaze. These were the looks he would give when Tara was a teenager and came to him with bruises on her arms from her father's not so gentle hand. She walked up to Jax, her kids climbing all over him like a jungle gym. "Let's not do this now Jackson." She whispered to him.
"I'm not going to let you leave until we talk later." He whispered back, his angry face vanishing as he scooped up his kids and ran them around the compound.
Tara began walking towards the clubhouse. "You're forehead is going to need stitches later!" She called after him.
Tara knew she had only barely dodged a bullet, but like a boomerang it was going to come back and kick her ass, but with Jax occupied outside with Emily and Abel, she could at least come up with a plan; only if her kids didn't rat her out again.
Of course she had come back to Charming for the safety aspect of it all after her run-ins with Josh, but she knew if she told Jax or the club about any of it, they would make a bigger deal about it than was necessary. Neither of her kids had been home when Josh had come after her that third time, but she guessed when she had been on the phone with the police, Emily had been listening in the other room. She had told Abel however that her black eye was due to walking into a door. She hoped that would be the story Abel told Jax.
Tara didn't have much time to think about Jax because as soon as she stepped inside the clubhouse she was picked up and swung around by Juice.
"Welcome back Doc!" He said, hugging her tight.
"Thanks Juice. My car missed you too; it's looking a little dirty you know?" She teased him.
"Haven't you heard Doc? I'm full SAMCRO now!"
"Yes I did. Congratulations Juice."
"Thanks, but I'm sure Half Sack; our latest prospect would be happy to wash your care."
"Half Sack?"
"You don't want to know."
"Tara, it's good to have you back."
"Thanks Bobby."
"Where are those kids of yours?"
"They are outside with Jax." Both Bobby and Juice went outside quickly. They were really just big kids themselves.
"Little girl! You come over here and give this Old Man some love."
Tara laughed, walking over to Piney. She leaned in and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. "I've missed you Dirty Old Man."
"Since you've been gone, he's only gotten dirtier and older."" Opie responded.
"Hey! Can we do this reunion shit when I don't have a fucking bullet stuck in my shoulder!" Tara heard Tig's voice from the other room. Tara rounded the corner and saw Chib's putting pressure on Tigs latest gunshot wound. "Thank Christ... The prodigal doctor returns. I've missed you baby. Nice to have a real doctor back." Tig turned to Chibs, "no offense."
"Fine by me. I've missed the good Doctor around here too. This one is kind of out of my scope. There's no exit wound and I cannot get that bullet out."
Tara took it all in; bloody towels on the floor and one bullet wound on Tigs left shoulder that seemed to be bleeding profusely. "Has he passed out at all? From the blood loss or anything?" Tara asked Chibs.
"Not yet... Unfortunately. He's plenty drunk though."
"That might be a good thing. The bullet is probably lodged in his scapula." Tara shook her head. Someone could have died. She put her medical bag on a nearby table.
"This gonna hurt Doc?" Tig asked.
"I can numb it up with a bit of lidocaine but I don't have anything stronger for you." She answered truthfully, pulling on a pair of latex gloves. "Just like riding a bike." She murmured to herself. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and tried to forget about the last bullet would she had seen. The one her son had gotten.
SOASOASOASOA
Outside the clubhouse, Jax was keeping Emily and Abel entertained by challenging them to a game of tag.
"Hey Abel?" Jax asked his son, dodging his advances.
"Yeah Daddy?"
"When did Mom have a black eye?" Jax immediately noticed Emily quiet, and put her head down, facing her shoes.
"Umm, before school ended in the summer."
"What happened?" Jax took note that his daughter was becoming increasingly fascinated with her shoelaces.
"She ran into a door." Abel answered, finally catching his Dad and tagging him. "You're it!" He yelled, running in the opposite direction.
Something was up, but interrogating his children was not something he was planning on doing, "I'm going to get you little man!"
Emily realized that they had stopped talking about her mother's black eye and got back into the game.
SOASOASOASOA
A couple of hours later, Tara finally emerged from the back room. That bullet had been a bitch to get out of Tig's bone, and her incision had taken a while to sew up. Luckily, Tig has fallen asleep about an hour ago so it had been easier for her to work on him.
The only person left in the clubhouse was Jax, sitting at the bar, obviously waiting for her to finish up.
"How's Tig?" He asked her.
Tara made her way around the back of the bar and poured herself a shot. "He'll live, but his shoulder is going to kick his ass for a while." She said, downing her shot. Jax loved that his wife could still take a shot like a champ. It was sexy. "Where are the kids?"
"Well, after Gemma gave them ice cream and they ran around the compound with Juice, I put them to sleep in my room. Asleep before they hit the pillow."
"They've had a long day. Let me take a look at that cut."
"Ok... It will give us time to talk." Tara froze. "You think I forgot the little bomb our son dropped?"
'Here it comes' Tara thought. "Fine, we'll talk." Tara walked back around the bar and stood close to Jax to examine a cut he had sustained above his black eye. Jax could barely stand the proximity. She smelled so good. He had missed her so much. "This guy wearing a ring?" Tara asked, inspecting the cut.
"I guess."
"You're definitely going to need stitches Jax."
"As if I'm going to let some drunk stitch me up." Jax teased.
"I am hardly drunk Teller. Don't you worry, I won't mess up that pretty face of yours." She teased back, something that came so naturally to the two of them, as if nothing had ever changed. "You want some local anesthetic?"
"Nah, I'll be fine. You think I have a pretty face."
Instead of answering him, Tara started her first stitch, causing Jax to grimace. "Should have opted for the local tough guy." She said as she started to sew up his laceration. Tara's work was impeccable but halfway through she was starting to feel a little bit woozy. She hadn't eaten anything for dinner and that shot of Tequila had gone straight to her head. "I'm sure your dirty skanks won't even notice your little scar." She blurted out.
"Excuse me?" Jax asked with amusement.
"Nothing. Sorry. Keep still." She said, focusing on the cut. "I'm almost done."
"You've been talking to Gemma haven't you?"
"She may have mentioned something like that." Tara said, cutting off her sutures and taking off her gloves. "All done."
"Of course Gemma would say some shit like that."
"Don't worry about it Jax. I don't even know why I said it." That was a lie; she knew exactly why she had said it. The thought of Jax with another woman made her skin crawl.
"We'll come back around to that later. I want to know about this black eye Abel was talking about."
"It was nothing Jax. I ran into a door at work. Hurt like hell."
"Then why when Abel and I were talking about it, did Emily shut down?" Tara didn't answer. Jax took his hands and ran them up and down her arms, "What really happened Tara? Did someone hurt you?"
"God Jax... No. It was an accident ok? End of discussion."
"No. Not the end of discussion. Tara, you are my wife and if someone hurt you-"
Tara backed away from him, "I would use the word Wife very loosely Jax. You know the only reason we're still married is just in case you get your ass thrown in jail and I won't have to testify against you."
Tara knew those words would hurt Jax as soon as they left his mouth. "You're right Tara. Wife in name only." Jax spat out angrily.
"I'm taking Emily and Abel and we're going home now. Check on Tig in a couple hours. Make sure he's still breathing. Get him to come to the hospital tomorrow so I can change his dressings properly." Tara knew she had won this round, albeit a little dirty but hopefully this would steer Jax away for a while.
She got up and took the familiar hallway route to Jax's old dorm room. Tara was overwhelmed with memories of her time back here with Jax. She didn't want to hurt him; she still loved Jax with everything in her but telling him about Joshua Kohn, was more dangerous for Jax and his club than it was to her and if pushing Jax away was the best way to do this, then so be it.
END CHAPTER
A/N: Thanks so much for all the great reviews for chapter 6! They made me get this chapter out as fast as I could.
This chapter was a bit of a beast and had a life of its own. Jax and Tara just can't work it out yet can they? But I still hope I threw in enough cuteness to tide you over. We still have a ways to go until they can finally figure their shit out.
