Hello wider world, *edges away from shell and over to desk.

Once again thanks for the lovely reviews, they mean a lot to me! Once again, my mail is failing…ugh, I will try later… Anyway, I have a few more chapters, probably 3 more because ideas keep popping into my head (usually when I should be concentrating in geography!) Anyways, for now…enjoy xxx

Chapter 4

John pulled up into the hospital car park and jumped out of the car, opening the passenger door and gently shaking his son awake.

"Rise and shine sleeping beauty." Dean's emerald green eyes blinked up at his father and he gave a small nod, accepting his John's hand out of the car and leaning against him heavily. His leg was beginning to hurt again despite the painkillers and he still felt shaky. However, Sam was his number one priority right now and Dean was determined to be the best older brother ever in an attempt to make things up to Sam, this was his fault after all, no matter what his dad said. He should have found a way out of that wardrobe. He should have held his brother's hand when he was in pain, no, scratch that. He should have taken his brother's pain away, no matter the cost.

John, finally convinced that Dean could support himself, led the boy into the hospital, waving at one of the nurses he saw earlier to get her attention. She gave him a cold smile as if to say, I still can't believe you left your son when he was in the operating theatre, but as soon as she saw Dean her face relaxed a little. At least that explained why the man had rushed off; he had gone to collect his other son, who frankly looked to be in a pretty awful state as well.

"Is he out of the operating theatre yet?" John got straight down to business, he had spent long enough away from his second born.

"They just wheeled him down to recovery, I am heading that way now, you can follow me. Are you feeling alright sweetie?" She addressed Dean in a sickly sweet voice, giving him a reassuring smile and a squeeze on his shoulder, making the boy flinch. She then turned and strutted down the corridor, her heels making an obscene amount of noise before he had a chance to answer. Then again, he would have lied, so it didn't really matter. Dean glared after her contemptuously before following. How he would love to add her to his hit list!

The corridors seemed to go on forever, looping together like a yard of string. Unwinding them would be like trying to unravel the mysteries of the universe! However, the length of the corridors was not Dean's problem, no, his problem was the fact that the further they travelled, the narrower they seemed to become. When they were just three corridors away from the recovery room Dean stopped dead in his tracks, making John turn around when he could no longer hear his son's footsteps.

"Dean? What's wrong buddy?" The colour had completely drained from Dean's face, he was leaning heavily against a wall and struggling to stay upright, tears pooling out of the corners of his squeezed-shut eyes.

"C-can't breathe." Dean seemed to suddenly go rigid, tensing up and gasping for air. John shot the nurse a look of panic before attempting to help Dean, whose legs had just buckled.

"Dean, c'mon Dean. You're fine Ace, you can breathe. It's just your mind playing tricks on you. Just think of Sam, he needs you buddy."

"C-cant." Dean stumbled to his feet, pulling away from his father's assuring hands and sprinting as fast as he could back the way he came and out of a fire exit door, ignoring the beeps of protest the alarm gave and the nurse's calls.

"DEAN!" John hurried after his son, who being young and fit had long lost the older hunter. Dammit.

John realised from a distant beeping that his eldest son had probably busted out of the hospital through a fire exit and headed off in the same direction, soon finding Dean in the middle of some tennis courts behind the hospital. His son was hunched over retching violently, shudders rippling through his body as the world spun around him.

Dean looked terrible, he was pale, shaking and crying; a sight John never thought he would see. He had gone from not seeing Dean cry for years to seeing him sobbing more than once in a single day. It was safe to say that John didn't care much for the change. He had never been one for emotions and had no idea about how to comfort his son. And all the while, there was a nagging presence in the back of his mind telling him to go and check on Sam. But he couldn't leave Dean again, he just couldn't.

"Hey Ace, can you hear me. You're alright champ." John approached his son cautiously, kneeling down on the too-green fake grass and rubbing soothing circles on Dean's back. Or at least what he had thought would be soothing circles. It turned out that Dean did not find them reassuring, in fact, he went berserk. Something was holding him down, placing pressure on his back, preventing him from moving. He couldn't move, he couldn't get out, he couldn't breathe.

"NO! LET ME GO, LET ME OUT!" John removed his hands at record speed as if Dean's body had scorched him, not his terrified voice and pleas.

"Dean, you have to calm down. I need you to breathe for me."

But Dean couldn't calm down and he couldn't breathe, he was choking on carbon dioxide. It was diffusing into his lungs, he wasn't getting enough oxygen. He was going to die. Dean sobbed brokenly, tears streaming down his cheeks, which had taken on a flushed, pink hue. He felt as if he was having a heart attack, his heart was beating so fast, and the pain in his chest only worsened Dean's shaking.

"Dean, Dean, look at me." Green eyes blinked up at John, but it was clear that Dean was not with him.

"D-" Dean's mouth had gone so dry that he could barely get the sound out. He felt as if he had cried out all of the moisture in his body.

"Shh, son. It's ok, it will all be over in a minute. Nothing is going to hurt you, you aren't trapped, you are in the middle of a field. There is plenty of oxygen, see?" John took a deep breath to illustrate, he had never seen his son in such a state and to be frank, it scared him.

Dean didn't bother responding; choosing instead to close his eyes and wait for the dizziness, nausea and churning sensation in his stomach to disappear.

John kept up a litany of it's okays and it's not reals, being careful not to put any pressure on Dean's body. He kept his distance until Dean's breathing seemed to have evened out of its own accord, fifteen minutes later. By the time it was all over Dean looked exhausted, his face drawn and pale as he huddled over his stomach, a few straggling tears trickling down his cheeks.

"Dean, do you feel ok now son?"

"Yeah, I-I'm fine. C-can we go and find Sammy now?" Dean put up his walls again, trying to hide his fear and embarrassment. He couldn't believe he had thrown up in front of his Dad, or run out of hospital, or cried. He had actually cried. God he was never going to hear the end of this, he was such a girl.

"You sure buddy?"

"Yes, sorry."

"You don't have to apologise son, I've got you."

"I was weak. Sam needed me and I…"

"You were not weak Dean, you were scared, and you are perfectly entitled to be. Everyone gets scared at times."

"You don't."

"Of course I get scared Dean, I am only human."

"Yeah, well what are you scared of then?" What killed Mary. Something coming after you and Sammy and hurting you. Having to bury my sons.

"Jellyfish." John lied easily. It was second nature to him.

"Jellyfish?" John gave a fake shudder.

"Hell yeah, slippery sons of bitches. They just kinda float around and then bam, you're the one that's jell-o." Dean found himself actually laughing. His dad, the man he looked up to, was afraid of a fish.

"Hey, don't laugh at me."

"Sorry Dad." Dean got to his feet a little shakily and allowed his father to wrap an arm around his waist, supporting him until they got back to the main entrance of the hospital. Dean hadn't realised quite how far he had managed to run, his mind had been all over the place!

When they got back to the hospital a rather concerned and flustered looking nurse ran over to them and Dean recognised her as the woman who had helped them earlier. Great, as if things couldn't get any more embarrassing!

"Are you two alright, you look a little pale honey." Honey, who the hell is this bitch?!

"He's fine, just doesn't like small spaces much, do ya kiddo?"

"No." Dean kept his head down and mumbled an answer, beginning to walk down the same corridors as before, once again following the nurse. But this time, John was right behind him, chatting pointlessly to try and keep his son calm. They passed the point where Dean had freaked out and Dean, although visibly paling, did not have another panic attack. Instead, his face set in determination as he made it down the last three corridors and burst into the room housing Sammy, who was sitting up a little blinking blearily up at his older brother.

"Dean?"

"Hey Sammy, you ok?"

"Y-yeah I'm fine. Ice cream, can I have ice cream?" Sam began to grin at Dean, his eyes a little vacant and focussed a few inches away from Dean's face.

"Sam?"

"Your brother is on some strong pain medication for his leg, he may be a little confused and out of character for a bit." The nurse quickly filled Dean and John in before taking her leave.

"Deeean!" This time Sam's voice had taken on a whiny tone and he reached a hand out to his brother, who looked confused but walked over anyway.

"Hey Sammy."

"Sit with me." Dean did, perching on Sam's bed and running a hand through Sam's hair, which was far too long in his opinion.

"You look white, like milk, but milk looks better than you right now. Partly cos I'm thirsty and partly cos you look like crap. Are you ok? Are you spoilt, like spoilt milk." Sam burst out laughing and Dean could barely make out the words "sour" and "manky" before Sam fell fast asleep.

"Well that was freaky." Dean shot his dad a small smile before settling down next to Sam. Although his little brother was tall, they were both skinny and could just about lie down side by side.

"That's one word for it, I was thinking hilarious. Anyway, no teasing him later, that's gonna be my job. You should get some sleep to champ. I'll be right here waiting for you in the morning and we can head out of here if the docs say Sammy's up for it."

"Awesome." Dean closed his eyes and waited for sleep to come. It was a very long wait.

*Crawls back into shell.

Seya in a couple of days, and once again, thanks for reading and please review. A few little words are enough to make my day!