Chapter 23

An Act

Disclaimer- Not Mine.

Previous Chapter...

Sirius took a step in the door and sighed. She was asleep. He looked over her sleeping form, deciding whether or not to wake her. But he chose the latter, figuring if she had gotten as much sleep as he did last night, that she might need an undisturbed nap.

He turned to leave but stopped again. Picking up a quill and some parchment he found on a bureau, he jotted down a few words. Silently, he left the letter on Julia's night stand on top of the uneaten box of chocolates. Then he left.

Julia opened her eyes just in time to see a figure with black hair leave her room. Sirius. She thought. What was he doing here? You'd think he'd leave me alone already...Julia looked on the nightstand to find the letter he left. She brought it closer to herself and gave a sour laugh after reading it.

Can we stay friends?

Sirius

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Sirius laughed at them and turned to Julia, "Hey Juls, I bet you ten galleons that I can apparate before y-." Sirius stopped immediately. He had forgotten. After six years of friendship, he was having trouble remembering it was over. He quickly faced forward again. Stupid, stupid...Sirius repeated over in his head. "Uh never mind." He whispered as he tried to get his mind off what he had just said by listening to Sir...what's-his-face.

Julia's eyes darted to him and though she didn't turn her head, she examined him carefully.

And that's when it seemed to his both of them, right in the pit of their stomachs. There would be no more joking around between them. No more of their petty bets or playing exploding snap. There would be no more trips to the kitchen, no more days spent in Hogsmeade in each others company and no more nights spent talking in the common room. There would be no more sneaking into a broom closet to avoid Tom or skipping classes to be with each other. But what seemed to hurt them the most was there would never be another time when all of the Gryffindor sixth years would hang out together again; with Sirius and Julia broken up, not to mention the fact that Lily hated Sirius and even the fact Sirius was only being honest with one of the Marauders, or at least honest to only one until he got the courage to tell Peter and Remus. As of that point, the group was a mess.

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"What is it?" She asked, unfolding the cream colored parchment.

James smiled as he watched her blush deeper at the contents of the letter. She mumbled a shocked exclamation and James explained, "The day you and Julia left my house, I guess you had been in such a rush to pack your things, you left this on the dresser."

Lily couldn't believe it as she stared down at the O+ written on last years report card. He had known. All along. "I don't know what to say..." She whispered. She could feel her heart thudding against her rib cage. All along...

"You don't have to say anything." James replied, pulling her closer to himself. "It speaks for itself."

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Julia stepped into the greenhouse and frowned when she noticed Lily wasn't in class yet. Neither was James for that matter. You see, the problem with being in such a tight group of friends was when something happened, you didn't know that many other people to turn to besides them. Julia sighed at her lack of choices of people to sit with. Seeing as the class was made up of mostly Slytherins and a few Hufflepuffs she didn't know that well, she didn't have much of a choice but to sit with Remus, Peter, Kara and him. Groaning quietly, she sat down between Kara and Peter.

"Settle down class!" Professor Sprout called out over the crowd of chattering sixth years. "Today, we will be collecting the sap of a Hillplant." She went over what a Hillplant was, what it looked like, what it ate...

Sirius starred at his hands as Sprout talked. He was wondering what was taking Lily and James so long to get there. He knew Lily rarely skipped classes because she wanted to make Head Girl. Boredly, he looked around the room until his eyes landed on Julia.

Julia saw him out of the corner of her eyes and dropped her head so she couldn't see him anymore. Frowning, Sirius took a quill and quickly wrote her a short note. When Sprout wasn't looking, he inconspicuously slid it to her.

Julia knew his note was in front of her she was debating reading it or not. She didn't want it to say anything that made her more angry at Sirius. But her curiosity got the best of her:

Did you get my note?

Julia took a slow, deep breath. She picked up her quill and tapped it on the table. If she answered no, she would only be prolonging the time in which she would have to answer the question that he left on her nightstand. No, I don't want to be your friend anymore. And for some reason, even though she hated Sirius, she still felt bad about never wanting anything to do with Sirius for the rest of her life.

Ya.

She scribbled under his question before sliding it back to him. Just as Sirius was about to ask Julia what her reply to the note was, Sprout said, "Now I want you to partner up." Julia's eyes widened as and darted around the room in a desperate search for a partner other than Sirius. She quickly turned to Remus and Peter but Remus shrugged and gave her an apologetic look as he nodded towards Peter.

"Kara?" Julia said, turning to her other side. Kara slowly blew up a bubble with her gum before popping it in Julia's face. "Sorry. Kevin and me are together." With that, she drooped her arm around the Hufflepuff and buried her face into his chest. Julia rolled her eyes and searched the room again.

"Julia?" Sirius asked. Julia bit her bottom lip and climbed under the high table to the other side of the room. She emerged near a group of Hufflepuff guys.

"Anyone here need a partner?" She almost pleaded.

All of the boys smiled in unison, almost a sly smile, and turned to another one of their Hufflepuff friends; Amos Diggory. Amos smiled kindly at her, "I'm sorry I was going to work with Kyle but-"

"But," One of his friends, Julia figured was Kyle, interrupted. "I've decided I don't want to be his partner. So you can." He gave Amos a manly pat on the back and whispered "Good luck, mate."

But Julia didn't hear him whisper anything because she turned back around to look at Sirius. Their eyes locked and Sirius frowned. Julia gave him a guilty look before turning back to Amos.

Amos noticed Julia looking over at her ex and said, "I heard what happened with you and Sirius. And, I'm sorry." He said, kindly.

Julia broke her eye contact with Sirius and turned to Amos. "Oh, it's um...fine." Julia forced a smile. "Really it is."

Amos smiled back at her before turning to the Hillplant in front of them. "So, uh, any chance you were listening to what Sprout was saying?" He asked her.

She shook her head. "All I heard was we are suppose to get the sap out of it..." She said.

Julia bravery took the stem of the Hillplant in her hand and squeezed it gently amusing the sap would come out through the big pores on it's leaves. But the sap wasn't like gooey maple but more like watery black ink. The sap went shooting out of the leaves, spraying Amos's face.

Julia's mouth formed an 'O' as she apologized. "I'm so sorry Amos." She said, walking over to a shelf where Sprout kept cleaning supplies. She grabbed a rag off of it and turned back to him.

Amos laughed and shook her head. "Don't worry about it."

Julia smiled in return and said, "Well the sap does suit you..." She joked.

Amos jokingly narrowed her eyes at her. He rubbed some of the sap onto his hand before smearing it on her face. "Suits you too."

Julia grinned and reached for a handful of sap...

A few seats down, one of the Hufflepuffs said to Kyle. "Look at that." He nodded towards Julia and Amos who were smearing sap on each other. "Looks like they're having a right good time eh?"

Kyle grinned, "He better thank us for that. If he had told her that he was already my partner he would have never gotten a chance to talk to her."

His friend added, "She's all he has talked about for months..."

"And now that Sirius and her aren't together..."

Their conversation was cut short as their plant started smoking a greenish blue color. "What does that mean?" One of them asked.

"No idea..."

On the other side of the greenhouse, Remus was working diligently to extract the correct amount of sap from the plant while Peter was a fair three feet away from the plant, just watching. Sirius, however, didn't even bother to appear like he was working. Instead, his eyes were glued onto Julia and Amos. He watched their every move and could feel jealousy and rage bubbling in his blood. "What a bloody prat..."

Behind him, a lower panel of glass on the greenhouse removed itself magically. "Shh...Come on before Sprout gets over here." Slowly, James and Lily slipped in through the hole in the greenhouse, through the garden that was thickly inhabited by various plants and out into the class room.

"I'm so much better than him...I deserve her..." Sirius mumbled as he watched Julia, in agony.

"If you deserve her so much then why don't you still have her." Lily said sourly as she sat down a seat away from Sirius.

Sirius scowled at her but kept his mouth shut. He clenched his fists under the table to let out some of his rage. "Well she doesn't waste any time." James said as his eyes caught Amos holding Julia close to him, attempting to write something with the sap across her forehead.

Lily smiled at the two. Julia and her eyes caught for a brief second at which time, Lily gave her the thumbs up. "They shouldn't be together..." Sirius muttered again.

"Well actually," Lily began. "Amos is nice, funny and handsome. And I think they make a great couple." She hissed.

James could feel the tension growing between the two and he was stuck in the middle. In an attempt to distract Lily from lashing at Sirius again, he said, "More handsome than me?" He asked with a grin.

Lily shook her head, "No one's as handsome as you." She replied.

Sirius groaned, "Could you save that talk for a broom closet."

Lily's eyes darted towards him, "Don't be sour because you're lonely. I hear Snape's single and I know how much you fancy him." She spat.

Sirius scowled and Lily continued, "Some might think that when you're making fun of him it's because you hate him. But I'm not as daft as those people. I know you're really trying to flirt with him."

Sirius slammed his hands on the table and stood up. A couple of Slytherins listening to their conversation snickered at Lily's comment. "Shut your mouth Evans."

Lily stood up too and looked up directly into his eyes. "No."

"Uh, Mr. Black, Miss Evans please take your seats." Sprout said. Lily and Sirius were known for their tempers and she wasn't about to have any fights start in her class.

Sirius sat down soon followed by Lily who glared at any Slytherins daring enough to look at her.

"You think you know everything Evans..." Sirius whispered when Sprout's back was turned. "But you have no clue what really happened."

"I know damn well-!" Lily began, her voice raising.

"No you don't." Sirius said, his voice staying at a whisper. "You just think you know."

James hung his head as Lily and Sirius talked over him. He just wished Lily could know why Sirius really did what he did. Same thing with Julia. If it was out in the open, he knew all this tension would be gone. He wanted to tell them but he had promised Sirius he wouldn't even mention it. Besides, he was afraid if what really happened slipped out, there could be even more trouble. Trouble that was way over their heads.

"Why do you act like you're still attached to her? It was you who cheated on her..." Lily whispered back.

Sirius turned to her and leaned towards the table to look around James, "Like I said Evans, you don't know everything."

"What? Did you kiss Jacky then later on that night you-?" She began.

"Shut up!" Sirius said, finding himself standing again. He looked down at Lily, his voice now raised. "I didn't want any of this to happen! I didn't do what I did because I wanted to break her heart! I want us to still be together more than anything." He shouted, the eyes of his fellow classmates finding him. "I love her and I would give anything to have her back. I'd die to spend one more day with her."

Lily opened her mouth to say something but shut it again. She was speechless. "That's right Evans. You have nothing clever to say to that because you know it's true." His voice quivered but he quickly found it again. "I've never felt the way I feel with her with any other girl in my life. It was the first time I loved anyone. The first time that I would give anything to spend my life with someone. Yes, I was willing to devote my entire life to her...I love her Lily." He looked away noticing everyone was looking at him. He shook his head and said, in a lower voice, "Now why would I throw that all away?"

Sirius looked down in embarrassment and in anger. And without even acknowledging anyone in the room, he turned to leave the greenhouse. Sprout didn't even bother telling him to stay because he looked that upset. Besides, even if she had asked him to stay, she knew he wouldn't.

"B-back to your work class." Sprout shakily said in the 'you-could-drop-a-pin-and-hear-it' quiet room.

Julia looked down at the table in front of her, her mind reeling so fast she almost didn't hear Amos say, "You alright?" He caringly draped and arm around Julia.

No...She thought but didn't reply to his question. Instead, she stood up and whispered, "I have to go."

"Ah, Miss Carr?" Julia heard Sprout say behind her as she reached the greenhouse door.

"Yes Professor?" Julia asked, facing her.

Sprout thought about asking her to stay but changed her mind at the last minute and said, "You know you'll have to make up the class..."

"Er, yes ma'am." Julia replied and Sprout gave a nod in response.

Once out of the greenhouse, Julia immediately saw Sirius heading for the castle. "Sirius!" She called to him.

Sirius heard Julia call him but didn't stop, his legs wouldn't let him. "Sirius!" She called again, louder this time. Sirius stopped walking and turned to face her. Julia started running through the damp muddy grass. Wet slosh kicked up as she did. "Sirius." She breathed once she reached him.

Sirius looked at her and let out a slow breath that both of them could see in the frigid air.

"It's getting cold out huh?" Julia lamely said as she crossed her arms over her chest for warmth.

Sirius resisted the urge to put an arm around her as she shivered. She's not yours anymore...Sirius reminded himself.

Instead of answering her, Sirius studied the writing on her forehead from the sap. "I love A.D." He read out loud.

Julia's lips curled into a small smile which disappeared completely when she realized that Sirius would not find that as amusing as she did. So, she ran a hand over her forehead smearing most of it off. "Did you really love me like that Sirius?" She blurted out.

Sirius was quiet. Slowly, his mouth formed an answer, "I still do."

Julia looked taken aback by his reply. She sat down on the stone steps, unable to hold her weight any longer. Sirius joined her on them shortly but chose to look out across the lawn instead of at Julia.

"Then-Then why did you do it Sirius? If you love me enough to...die for me?"

"But that's why I did it Juls. That's why I cheated on you; because I love you." He said truthfully.

Julia frowned in confusion, "So you cheated on me because you love me? That doesn't make any sense."

"There's more to it." He said, locking his eyes with hers.

Julia searched his gray eyes for the truth but wasn't sure where to look, "So tell me."

"I-I can't." Sirius said frustrated. He stood up and started walking towards the lake. Julia let out a sigh and followed him.

"Then how do you expect me to believe you?" She asked, putting her hand on his arm to stop his from walking any farther.

"Trust me." He said, a hint of anger showing in his voice. "Why can't you just do that?"

"Because you cheated on me! You broke all the trust I had in you when I saw you do that." She said, trying her best to remain calm. "And let me tell you something, I had a hell of a lot of trust in you."

Just tell her...Sirius told himself. But he knew he couldn't.

When Sirius remained silent, Julia sighed before saying, "About the letter you left me..." Sirius looked up at her hopefully, his big gray eyes searching her face. "To be honest with you, I don't want anything to do with you. Ever."

Even though Sirius had thought through how she might respond and knew that she was probably going to say something similar to what she just said, he was still shocked at how harsh she sounded. "But," Julia continued. "We're tearing James and Lily apart. Lily hates you and James sticks up for you." She sighed. "Even Remus doesn't act like himself anymore. It's like they're all walking pins and needles."

"If Lily wasn't such a bloody-"

"Sirius." Julia interrupted. "You have the same temper as her and I know if you ever saw Lily cheating on James you would be just as mad."

Sirius frowned, knowing she was right. "And that's why I think we should at least act like we don't hate each other." Said Julia.

"I don't hate you." Sirius said, looking her deep in the eyes.

Julia didn't feel like arguing with him so she concluded, "I just wanted you to know why I will be acting like we're still on speaking terms. Because, even though I'm going to act like I enjoy your company, I'm not going to change my opinion about you."

Sirius hung his head. She didn't want anything to do with him. She just wanted to keep their friends together. "Okay." He said quietly.

Julia frowned at the sad expression on his face. "Come on let's get back to class." She said, holding her hand out to him.

Sirius looked at the hand she was holding out to her. It's not real....He reminded himself. It's just an act. The temptation got to him and he took her hand. Her skin against his felt so different from the last time he held her hand. It was like that innocence of being in love for the first time; like he was holding it for the first time.

A/N- Sorry this took so long to get out. I've been pretty lazy lately.

Aw poor Sirius! She should tell him right?

Next chapter will have more comic relief (because this is starting to be a depressing story and fast) so long as I get reviews...

Review please...

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