Ok so this is a ZafJo kinda moment in the grid and at home
Zaf hardly stopped working all day, too much work to do, too many memories to forget. He was frustrated, thinking he was slowly getting over it, letting go of his fear and anger. Ok so had a few nightmares but during the day, he did forget. During the day he was feeling more normal. More like Zaf.
But since seeing the pictures today had changed his thoughts. He couldn't get the reaction of fear he had, how could that be normal?? He was beginning to feel the familiar ache in his head again. Great he thought with a roll of his eyes.
Jo was watching him from her desk. It was nearly 10pm and she had finally finished writing up the details from his last under cover operation and had scoped the surveillance tape Adam had told her to watch. She looked over to see Zaf head on hands staring into space. It broke her heart to see him like this, the guy she loved; No liked she told herself. Whatever went on in the meeting with Harry had seriously affected him. Yes at night his memories haunted him, but on the grid he seemed more normal, if not just quieter than before.
Not being able to stand it anymore, she walked quietly to his desk. Standing behind him she placed her hand softly on his back and put her mouth to his ear
"Zaf are you ready to go home now?" Jo whispered.
"Hmm? Em, yeah just give me a second." Replied Zaf.
A few minutes later they were sitting in Zaf's car finally going home after a long day. Nothing was really going on at the grid, just finishing reports and closing old cases, tying up loose ends. In this job you could go through weeks of tons of work and then have the old slow week, like this one. Thought Jo as they sat silently Jo gazing out of the window, Zaf concentrating on the road. His brown eyes focussing on the road, full of concentration.
Jo for one was happy for the quiet week, hoping it would leave her feeling fresh and rejuvenated. Zaf however wasn't so happy. He liked having lots of work to do, it gave him something to think about at night.
The complete drive was silent, once they had parked Jo decided to try and get Zaf to open up. Whatever he was thinking, it obviously wasn't a nice thing.
"Zaf, do you wan to talk about what happened in his office today." She asked quietly.
Zaf kept his eyes focused on the steering wheel, not wanting Jo to see the tears that he could feel sting the back of his eyes. Taking a deep shaky breath he decided to tell her about it.
Waiting for his answer Jo waited patiently, knowing she had almost broke the protective shell he had encased himself in since his return.
"Harry, he wants me to finish my report on ... what happened," not wanting to use the word kidnapping, "he.. he showed me pictures of who they think took me and it brought everything back to me."
He paused to wipe a single tear that ran down his cheek, inside he cursed himself for crumbling and actually showing the emotions he had been bottling up. Jo however was glad he was finally telling her how he felt, she felt it made him a strong person for doing so. She took his hand reassuringly and gave it a squeeze letting him know she was there for him.
"Everything just hit me at once, the beatings, abuse, torture for information. I spent the whole time thinking of how I would never see my friends, family...you. The tied me to a chair and left me like that for days, sometimes one or two men would come in and just attack me and I couldn't defend myself or stop it."His voice had finally cracked on the last word, remembeing other more hoffic tortures he was subjected to but couldn't face telling Jo, so Jo pulled him into a tight hug and rubbed his back soothingly.
"Everything is going to be ok. It's alright to feel like this, I will help you through this, we all will. You are not alone Zaf."She spoke softly and comfortingly. "Come on let's go inside, it's too cold here." She added as she pulled away and opened the door.
Zaf had to smile at that as he nodded, taking a deep breath and wiping away his tears, he got out of the car and locked it.
What did you think? let me know i want a few reviews before I add more to make sure it's ok
So please R and R!!
