Ok so I have the next chapters planned but im also drafting a story for thr bill as inspiration has struck so apoligies for lack of updates!!

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN SPOOKS (otherwise Zaf wouldn't be supposedly dead)


The next morning Adam, Jo and Zaf all looked like they had about 7 hours of sleep between them. Adam was kept awake by his worry for Zaf, afterall he knew what it was like to go through a traumatic experience on the job.When Fiona died he found out the hard way that keeping emotions and feelings inside was not healthy. He was awake for most of the night trying to think of ways to help him.

Zaf had also had a rough night, the nightmares were back and worse than ever. He spent most of the night re-living some of the worst memories of his life. It was not fun. The time that wasn't spent dreaming was spent either talking to Jo or trying to stay awake so he could escape from his dreams. He felt terrible, looked terrible and he knew it. He had thought of calling in sick ( it was Jo's suggestion as he wouldn't really be much use today seeing as he only had about two or three hours asleep.) But decided that spending a whole day in the house would drive him crazy. Plus he didn't want a day of doing nothing, he needed to keep busy right now.

Jo hadn't had much sleep either, she was talking to Zaf until the early hours of the morning. They chatted about what had happened on the grid when he was gone. It was just small talk but in a way it helped. Zaf cut the conversation short when he saw her yawn and noticed how tired she was. Trouble was that when she did go to bed she couldn't sleep, she kept thinking about Zaf and what he must have gone through both physically and emotionally. It kept her awake for hours until exhaustion finally overwhelmed her. She in such a deep sleep that she never heard Zaf battling his demons in the next room, but she could tell by his dishevelled appearance this morning that he had obviously had a troubled night.

Harry and Malcolm watched the three tired members of their team quietly sat at their desks. Adam was the first member in the office, surprisingly beating Ros in today, which shows how early he was. He had small shadows under his eyes, which wouldn't usually be noticed by people but these people were spooks and they noticed things that others wouldn't.

Ros entered the office 20 minutes later, surprised to see Adam already at his desk typing furiously with an untouched cup of coffee sat at the corner of the desk. He looked up when he heard the sounds of her shoes clicking on the floor.

"Hey," he said with a nod.

"Hi," she replied with a tight smile, she started to walk to her desk but changed her mind and turned on her heel to face Adam.

"Do you know if Zaf's ok? It's just he hasn't seemed his self lately," Ros asked, she didn't really want to show her concern but she was worried and couldn't hide it anymore.

"To be honest Ros I'm not sure, and I'm worried about him too. I hope Jo managed to talk to him last night."

"I didn't say she I was worried. I just have a slight concern about a college that's all." Ros replied.

Adam had to smile, he knew fine well underneath her hard exterior Ros did care about her fellow team members and she was just as worried about Zaf as Jo and the rest of the team were, including himself.

Zaf and Jo entered 15 minutes after Ros. Jo came in first looking tired but happier than she had in a while. She said her hello's and sat down at her desk, rubbing her eyes as she did so. Adam walked over from the coffee machine with two mugs and placed one on her desk.

"You look like you need it." He said with a warm smile.

"Thanks, for the coffee, not the remark about how I need it." She smiled back,"Zaf's parking the car before you even ask, he'll be up in a minute."

Adam grinned, how did she know he was going to ask that? He asked himself.

Sure enough Zaf wandered in a few minutes later. He looked exhausted, more tired than Jo and Adam put together Harry thought. It's about time to talk to Mr Younis Harry decided, he seemed to be self- destructing in front of his very eyes. Seeing Adam walking over to the desk Harry realised it would have to be later.

"Zaf, can I talk to you, outside."Adam whispered as he walked over to his desk. Zaf nodded tiredly and made his weary bones support him as he stood up and followed Adam outside the office, leaving Harry, Malcolm, Jo and Ros looking at each other bewildered.

"Mate you look awful, I'm guessing you had a bad night." Adam said, trying to lift the mood yet make his point at the same time. Zaf could only nod, too tired to pretend otherwise and tell Adam he was fine.

"You need to talk to someone about this Zaf, what you are doing isn't healthy, believe me I found out the hard way." Adam continued, hoping he was getting through to not only his team mate but what he considered to be a close friend.

Zaf looked at the floor, too busy fighting his emotions to speak, he felt hot tears prick his eyes. He fought them back furiously, he really didn't want to cry in front of Adam.

"Zaf we had this same conversation last year only the roles were reversed. You went through a hell of a lot out there, it's perfectly normal to feel like how you feel." Adam was in full flow now and Zaf knew he was right.

Taking a deep breath Adam said, "Wh...when Fiona died it was the worst moment of my life and I was in a really dark place for a long time but I didn't accept help at first from anyone but you never gave up on me. You made sure I got the help I needed and I will always be forever grateful as will my son. Now it is you turn. Let help me you, let us all help you." Adam finished.

Zaf couldn't hold back the tears any longer, the barrier keeping himself in check had dissolved. He was too tired to pretend anymore, hearing Adam talk about his wife like that and everything he went through made him realise he did need help to overcome his demons.

Seeing his friend start to cry Adam pulled him to a tight hug, letting know he was going to support him through all of this they all were.


Not many chapters left now!!