As I promised, another chapter! Not really much to say, so happy reading :D
CHAPTER TEN
The next day, Blaine kept his promise of catching up with Kurt. They met up for coffee at a Starbucks near the class building, deciding that they had plenty of time to practise afterwards.
"Sorry about last night," Blaine sighed after they had been talking for around an hour about everything and anything, "I know we talk about our pasts, but I thought it might be overstepping if I stayed."
Kurt let out an exasperated sigh. "Blaine, if Sebastian didn't want you knowing about Adrian, he wouldn't have brought him up in front of you."
"I guess you're right, but I don't want either of you to feel like you have to tell me things just because I'm there. Especially Sebastian, I can tell he doesn't have the best past, I can see it in his eyes when we talk about ours."
Blaine thought that he was saying all the right things this time, but apparently not because Kurt's expression changed and he looked very similar to how he did last night, which worried Blaine, the last thing he wanted to do was upset him.
"Anyway, enough talk of pasts and stuff, want to go practise?"
Kurt nodded eagerly, his grin returning. Blaine was satisfied that he hadn't completely ruined their day and walked with a happy step to their building where the theatre was.
The day of performances arrived and Sebastian was more than nervous. He and Puck had been practising every day since he had finally agreed to the song, much to Puck's surprise. He admitted that the song was perfect, not only did the lyrics fit with his own story, but he and Puck really did sound great singing it together – not that he told Puck that, he told him that he just couldn't be bothered putting in any effort finding another song.
Sebastian knew he had to overcome the fear that he held for his brother, it wasn't healthy to live every day thinking that history could repeat itself. It was just so hard for him though, he didn't believe he would ever be able to get over that fear.
He approached the stage from the back where he had been giving himself a pep talk for the past ten minutes and tried not to think too much about what he was about to do. Puck was already on stage setting up his guitar, stool and microphone when Sebastian stepped up to the other microphone.
Sebastian tried to imagine nobody sitting in the seats of the theatre. He tried to picture himself alone without the watching eyes on him, but it only proved to make him more nervous than he was before. Without giving him the chance to reconsider what he was doing, Puck began to strum on his guitar, indicating Sebastian's intro.
Pushing his previous thoughts from his mind, Sebastian started the performance off with the higher notes that his partner was unable to reach, while Puck took the first verse.
Ooh ooh ooh oh oh...
Sleep now under my skin
Make sure you'll try to
Conjure the wind
And ease my mind
Ooh ooh ooh oh oh...
Somebody call out to your brother
He's calling out your name
Ooh ooh ooh
Sebastian tried to stop them, he really did, but he couldn't stop the flow of memories from penetrating his mind while he sung his next part. His thoughts drifted back to the hardest time of his life. The memories were painful, but he knew he had to relive them throughout the duration of the song for him to finally come to terms with his fear and hopefully to erase some of it.
Sebastian looked to Kurt, who was seated in the middle of the group, for encouragement; his nerves dissolved slightly when he saw the nod and smile that Kurt sent his way. That was all he needed to continue through the song, alternating parts with Puck.
You cower in the corner
Confide in your father
Sebastian was consumed by the memories that flashed across his vision which only made it easier for him to communicate his emotions through his voice. Puck's lines triggered the worst moment Sebastian had ever experienced, a moment he would do everything possible to prevent from happening ever again.
The sound crying filled his ears, causing him to force his own tears back. The sobs he could hear were accompanied with desperate pleas for help, the boy was calling out "Sebastian" with so much terror that it shook the boy on stage to the core.
He tried to fight for his brother, but he couldn't do it. The screams became more panicked, while the volume decreased as he moved further and further out of Sebastian's reach. He sang through his words as he let his past take over him, surging through him and his voice.
Hiding under the covers
With no one else to blame
Ooh ooh ooh
Sebastian remembered the time when he was fourteen years old and he sat alone in his once shared room. It was still set up for him and his brother after four years – which probably wasn't healthy for him – but he hadn't been able to bring himself to getting rid of belongings that weren't his. He had felt that taking those things away would mean the end of his fight, the fight he refused to back down from for his brother.
The memories from that fateful day resurfaced as Sebastian powered through, the image of his ten year old self sobbing in the corner of his room, cowering away from what he believed to be approaching demons. No one could help the young boy, not even his father. Sebastian's heart clenched as he felt the pain he had felt back then, the day he lost the most important person in his life.
He felt the anguish and the guilt that had filled him all those years ago. He remembered how he had blamed himself for so long that it wasn't until he finally crashed that he was able to get on with his life.
You were fucked up by the blame
Sebastian finished the song, holding out the last note. He stared out into the eyes of each person in the group who were all watching the two boys on stage with teary eyes. The memories had finally caught up to Sebastian and he ran, he ran into the arms of the only person who could comfort him in this moment, the only person who knew him well enough to know the story of his past; Kurt.
Kurt met Sebastian in the isle between the stage and first row of seats, engulfing the terror stricken boy in a tight embrace. The two stood in each other's grip for a few moments while Sebastian fought the urge to completely break down, but a few tears did escape his eyes. It had been eleven years, but it was still painful to think about and caused Sebastian more mental exhaustion than he cared to admit.
After receiving a small kiss on his forehead and being held tightly for about five minutes, Sebastian was able to recover from reliving the scariest day of his life.
Once the performances were over for the day – Finn and Rachel and Sam and Mercedes had also performed – Mr Shue excused Kurt and Sebastian for the remainder of the lesson. Kurt had apologised to Blaine for not being able to stay to practise, but Blaine had insisted that he be with Sebastian.
"Kurt honestly, we don't even need any more practise." Blaine assured an apologetic Kurt. "But Sebastian needs you."
There was no way he would allow Kurt to neglect Sebastian at a time like this. He and Kurt could hang out any other time they wanted, but right now Sebastian comes first.
"Thanks Blaine." Kurt smiled down at Blaine and then proceeded to back his way out of the theatre. "We'll catch up afterwards, just the two of us."
Blaine couldn't help the large grin that stretched across his face at Kurt's words. He knew not to get his hopes up, and he wouldn't, but that didn't mean he could control his ever persistent feelings. He tried, he really did try to stop feeling the way he was for Kurt, but there was no denying that he was falling for his friend, already.
Blaine was scared that after only knowing Kurt for this short amount of time he had already developed these feelings for him, but he was more scared of the fact that he knew he couldn't feel this way. It was wrong. What would happen if Kurt found out? What would happen if Sebastian knew? Blaine didn't want it to get to that.
He agreed to meeting up with Kurt later on and forced the countertenor out of the door before he went to find Jeff and Nick; Blaine wanted details.
"So…how's it going guys?" Blaine asked as he sat down on the desk chair in Nick's dorm room, giving two guilty looking boys a knowing smirk.
Nick hadn't seen Blaine since the awkward incident and hadn't had the chance to explain anything to him, so Blaine had taken it into his own hands and decided to pay the boys a visit – texting ahead of course.
They all sat in silence as Nick and Jeff exchanged nervous glances because of the looks Blaine was giving them – much to his own amusement. The two boys were just about ready to cave when Blaine jumped up from the chair and tackled the two of them into a very clumsy, yet friendly hug.
"I'm so happy for you both!"
After grumbles of pain and flailing arms, the three boys straightened up, Blaine ending up sitting wedged between the couple. "How did it happen? Who asked who? Are you actually boyfriends? Are you going public? Wait, Jeff are you out? Oh Nick, are you ready to come out? Or, what are you-"
"BLAINE!"
The boy in question silenced himself when Nick and Jeff yelled at him, forcing him to finally shut up so they could answer his questions. They both told the story of how it happened, earning 'awwws' and 'that's adorable' from Blaine when the moment seemed cute enough. Once the main question was out of the way, the two boys began answering the smaller ones.
"As you can guess, Jeff initiated it."
"Yes, Nick is my boyfriend."
"We are going public, we want everyone to know."
"Yes and no, I am out to some people, but not a lot."
"I'm more than okay with coming out."
Blaine stared at the two boys in astonishment. They really were perfect for each other, he was so glad that things had worked out between them. For about an hour, the three of them dropped all talk of boyfriend's and spent their time in serious discussion, because what's more serious than Harry Potter?
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If anyone has any theories of what is going on, please tell me what you're thinking! I love hearing what people think might be happening or might happen later on!
