Sooo I thought I'd go ahead and post this since it's already done. I'm currently working on the next chapter which will be in Demi's pov, since we only know what Selena's been thinking.

You guys remember Voldemort? The codename given to Selena's crush? Well yeah that niggah is in here(:

I really like this chapter, but not really. I hope you guys enjoy it(:


Selena's Pov

"Selena, I love you." I sat up once she said it.

She caught my attention, it wasn't just the words, it was the tone and the lack of words. I made sure to get my point across that she's my best friend, I didn't want to hint that I love her more than that. But she doesn't, she flat out says I love you, and she seems surprised at the words that just left her mouth.

"I'm sorry Selena, for everything." I take her hand in mine and start playing with her fingers, but I don't take my eyes off of hers, I'm really interested in what she's saying.

"I was stupid, immature, and all that other stuff, but most importantly I let things get in the way of our friendship. I wanna start over, and I know this isn't the first time I've said this, but there's a lot more to it. I just wanna tell you everything, I wanna get it over with. I know this is from the past, but I never really let go, with you I don't wanna let go of the past, I wanna remember all the little things we did together.

We drifted apart, and you could say that was a mutual thing because both of us gave up at some point, but we wouldn't have drifted off as much if it weren't for me.

It's obvious I wasn't in a good place back then, and everyone knows I wasn't making the best choices, but there's a reason I made them, it was because of you. I'm not blaming you for anything, well kinda. The only thing you're to blame for is the reason I'm still here.

I was out partying and hooking up with people because I was trying to find in them what I had found with you, and it didn't work. It only helped me stay in the darkness of depression. Those were very hard times because I didn't have you there, I didn't have my best friend there.

I never meant to push you away, I basically pushed you into Taylor's arms, and whenever I'd think about that it would kill me. I was so jealous at that time, I didn't wanna share you with anyone, I wanted you all to myself, I still do.

You've done so much for me, you've changed me for the better. I just wanna thank you, for being there for me, for tolerating all my bullshit over the years. And I love you." I just stared at her in awe.

I didn't once look away, I just sat next to her and tried to process everything she had just said to me. It's a lot to take in, and I don't get where all of this is coming from. I'm happy she's being so open with me, even though I didn't ask her to be. I'm just curious as to where all of this came from.

"Demi are you okay?"

"I don't really know anymore. I just wanted you to know that. But there's still one more thing I want you to get clear. I don't even know if this is the right time for it, but for us nothing has ever worked the way we wanted it to. I feel like I've waited way too long for this, but I want you to know, you deserve to know.

I didn't think I'd tell you today, so um I'm sorry if it's stupid but I thought I'd just wing it." She chuckles a bit which causes me to smile.

All my attention is focused on her, all that matters in this moment is her and what's she gonna tell me. She intertwines our fingers together and that's when I finally break the eye contact.

I had already grabbed her hand the moment she said she loved me, but I didn't pay much attention to it. But once our fingers locked together, I felt something cold press into my finger, and I just felt everything stop in that moment.

I looked down at her fingers and then looked back up, I was hoping she would notice, and silently realize what I'm trying to say, but she doesn't. She takes in a deep breath and smiles at me, she's completely oblivious to everything that's going on in my head.

"I'm in love with y-"

"Are you engaged?" I interrupted her. I had to.

"W-what?"

"Don't play stupid. What is this? How long have you had it? Why didn't you say anything to me? Gosh I'm an idiot." I get up and start walking around the room.

What the hell just happened? She's fucking engaged, the love of my life is fucking engaged. And for some reason I thought I could have a chance with her, but no. Nothing works out the way I want it to be. Why? This isn't fair, this isn't fair.

I stop walking and let my back hit the wall. I start sobbing as I slid down the wall and hug my knees, I can't hold it in, I don't even care that she's still here, I just let the tears roll down my face and the small screams escape my lips. I'm a total mess, and I just don't even care right now.

How did this even happen? Nothing makes sense when it comes to us. I mean she kissed my like two months ago, and then like a week later she tells me that it meant nothing to her, only to apologize a couple weeks after that. And now she's here, and she pretty much told me she's in love with me, but she's engaged? What the hell? She can't do that to me.

She can't just come back to me like this and tell me she's in love while wearing a fucking ring on her ring finger. She can't do this to me. This isn't fair.

"Selena?"

"W-what?" I can barely talk, my breathing is uneven and all I wanna do is scream.

"I-I don't know. I just I don't know. I don't wanna see you like this." It's your fucking fault I'm like this right now.

No, I can't blame it on her, it's my fault. If I would have told her how I felt things would have been different, I wouldn't be in this position right now.

I flip her the bird, I don't feel like talking to her, I can barely talk as it is, I feel a huge lump in my throat. She's not making it any better by getting closer to me, but again I don't say anything I just watch her. My eyes watch her hands, I can't stop staring at her ring. I'm so broken right now.

"Sel, you're gonna be okay." She places her hands and my knee and gently squeezes it causing me to look up.

Her eyes meet mine, she looks like she's about to cry any minute, but I know she's trying to stay strong. Typical us, even after years it's still the same thing. It was odd for us to cry together, usually one of us was vulnerable while the other held it together. I guess this time she's my rock.

"Girls? What happened?" My mom comes in and looks at us, I can tell she's worried, but I can't speak up, so Demi does it for me.

"I'm sure Selena will tell you later. We're fine, I think."

"Um, alright. Well I made lunch, just thought I should let you know." I looked up at my mom as she spoke. I know she was worried, but she shouldn't be. It's just a broken heart, it'll heal. Right?


Demi had been cracking jokes and having small talk with my mom, just like always, I on the other hand was lost in my own world.

I still haven't said anything yet, there's really nothing to say. I've decided to just let my thoughts consume me until Demi and I are left alone to speak again. I'm gonna try to be mature about it when the time comes. I'm gonna tell her that I'm happy for her. Because I am, I'm happy she's found love, even if it isn't with me.

"So Demi, any new love interests?" I glare at my mom from the other side of the table, but she doesn't take notice since she's biting into her sandwich.

Demi looks at me and gives me a small smile and a wink. I try to not roll my eyes, but I end up blushing instead.

"Actually, there's someone that's caught m-."

"Why don't you tell her that you're engaged huh?" In interrupt her again, and she's completely shocked by my outburst.

"Demi you're engaged? That's wonderful." My mom speaks up and smiles at Demi. Demi smiles back but then shakes her head.

"No, Mandy I'm not engaged. And Selena would know that if she let me finish instead of drawing up her own conclusions." She turns to face me and I can see the sadness in her eyes, they're glassy, she's most likely close to tears. She speaks up again, but directs it at me.

"So no Selena, I'm not engaged. But of course you didn't let me finish, you came to your own conclusion that hurt both of us."

"Excuse me Mandy." Demi smiles at my mom, and she nods in return. I watch as Demi leaves the kitchen and walks back up stairs. I was expecting her to leave, but I'm glad she didn't.

"I'll get the plates for you." I scoot the chair back so I can get up. I start walking around the table and start picking up the plates. My mom continues eating, I'm surprised she hasn't said anything yet, but I'm sure I'll get an earful later on.

I walk back to the sink and turn on the water. Usually I'd just use the dishwasher, but I need some time with my thoughts before I go up there and face Demi. I'm not sure what I'm thinking right now.

She's not engaged? I didn't give her a chance to respond, but she never denied it, she didn't even bring it up again. But that ring means something, she's not wearing it just to wear it. I guess I could have let her explain herself, maybe I just overreacted and we can be together and ha ha no. This isn't some fairytale, there is no happy ending.


"You're something else Gomez." I close the door behind me and sit down next to her.

"I don't know if you're gonna talk to me or not, but I'm still gonna talk either way.

I read some of your stuff, and I'm really surprised at everything that's in here. Out of all the songs, I Promise You is probably my favorite. I've written some songs about you as well, Heart Attack is actually about you."

Great she read my things from my songbook. I wanna be mad, but I can't. I was lucky enough to get I Promise You released, I went through hell to try to get the record company to approve.

I hoped Heart Attack would be about me, but I thought it wouldn't be. I'd assume it'd be about Wilmer, but I'm happy it's about me.

"I was scared of everything that had been happening. Things were changing way too fast and I felt like I had no control over it, and that only caused me to panic.

I've known for years what I feel for you, but even then I couldn't exactly admit it. And when I finally did, I decided to ignore it, which is why we became so distant.

I thought you would never feel that way about me, I was terrified of ruining what we already had so I kept to myself. But I was wrong, because you like me back, and it makes me wish I would have taken a chance with you when we were younger. Like I said before, things never work out the way we want them to when it comes to us. Ever since we became friends our relationship has been full of surprises, and I guess that's what makes it so special and unique because in the end we always come back to each other." I let my hand fall on her thigh and I gently rub it to comfort her.

She reaches for my hand and locks our fingers together. I don't smile, as much as I want to I can't because I can still feel that ring on her finger. She tugs my hand to get my attention, my eyes meet hers and then she sighs. There's obviously more to tell.

"I just, I don't even know if this is making any sense, gosh I'm stupid. This sounded a lot better in my head, but I just wanted to be completely honest with you, there's no holding back anymore.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you Selena. I'm in love with you, and I'm so very very sorry about everything that I've done to you."

I don't say anything to her, I just stare at her as I try to process everything she just said. She loves me, she's in love with me, and she's sorry for everything. The love of my life just confessed her love for me, why am I not happy?

I mean I already knew since she said it before, but I cut her off, even though I didn't let her finish I knew what she was getting at. I was too focused on the ring at that moment, but she's not engaged, but either way she's in a relationship. I guess that's why I'm not happy about it, I know she can't be mine.

I'm in too much shock to say anything. What do I say? Should I tell her I love her as well, or do I continue to keep everything to myself? She already knows I like her, she read my old songbook, but there's a difference in actually saying it and reading it.

She said so herself, when it comes to us things never work out the way we want them to. She took the risk, so why can't I? I'm already used to feeling pain when it comes to our relationship.

"Demi." I whisper her name and gently tug her hand. I lift my head up and our eyes meet, here goes nothing.

"I-I love you too Voldemort." She looked at me confused and then burst out laughing. I couldn't help but blush at how stupid I could be, but that's all I am when I'm with her.

She turned her body around so it was facing me, but I stared at the ground. I'm still blushing and trying to get over how stupid that just sounded.

"So I'm your forbidden love? I'm that person you were falling so hard for? I'm your Voldemort?" Her smile has never been so contagious until right now.

"Yeah. That's you." I started leaning in, once I was close enough I cupped the side of her face. I watched as my hand gently trembled against her cheek. This is the first time I'm actually kissing her.

My lips gently brushed up against hers, I felt her smile and she pushed our lips together. I wanted to laugh but I decided against it.

The moment our lips actually locked, I lost it. People say they feel sparks, like fireworks when they kiss, but that is nowhere near as close as to what I'm feeling right now. I'm not feeling anything, but I feel everything all at once.

I've never had such an amazing kiss, everything about this is perfect. The way our lips fit together, the way the slowly move against each others, it's perfect. I can feel my stomach doing flips, a field of butterflies are in my stomach, my heart is beating a mile a minute, and my mind is racing.

I pull back, but only because I was curious to her reaction. Her eyes slowly fluttered open and I felt like I was staring at an angel.

"I can't believe I ever denied how I felt for you, I can't believe I kept it hidden for so long.

You're such an amazing person, and I love you so so much. I'm sorry I feel like I'm babbling, but I don't wanna stop telling you how much I love. I'm just happy that I can finally say it, and you feel the same way, and I haven't been this happy in a while Can you kiss me again? Or can I kiss you? I'm a mess ri-."

"Demi shut up, just kiss me." She pulled me into her and kissed me, just like I told her to. Both of us were smiling into the kiss, this made it even better, as if that were possible. With just one kiss she has me so hypnotized.

I pulled away again and pecked her nose. I hate having to pull away, but we can't be doing this and that kills me, there's still so much we need to figure out.

"W-what's wrong?" She looked at me with sad eyes and I immediately felt guilty.

"Nothing. I just, what's next? I love you Demi, and we can't even be together." I didn't want to be a buzz kill, but we don't even know what's gonna happen next. We just got ourselves into something without thinking about the outcome.

"Are you with Justin?" I could hear how disgusted she was by having to say his name, I shook my head and laughed.

"No, but you're with Wilmer right?" I knew they were together, but I still asked.

"Y-yeah."

"He gave you that ring, right?" She nodded and sighed.

"We can't do this to him, you can't do this to him. You guys love each other, and I'm not getting in the way of that."

"I'll break up with him."

"I can't ask you to do that for me. There's a reason you went back to him instead of coming to me, maybe you guys are meant to be."

"What?! Are you serious Selena? You can't say that after watch just happened, we're obviously meant to be." She raised her voice at me and caused me to jump a bit.

"But maybe now isn't our time."

"Selena, no. I can't, please?" I saw how her eyes were beginning to tear up, I took in a shaky breath and blinked. I hated seeing her like this, but I have to stay strong.

"I'm just telling you the truth Demi. Have you ever thought why you went back to Wilmer?"

"Yeah, but I don't know. I never really got over him, but you're always the one I wanted, you will always be the one I want, the one I need."

"I've waited years for this, for us, but I'll continue to wait." I pecked her cheek and wiped a tear that was rolling down her face.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was barely audible, it sounded like she wasn't even talking because of how bad she started crying, but I still heard her, and it broke my heart.

Of course I always find a way to fuck things up between us. Why can't we just be happy together? Why can't I just call her mine and be with her everyday? Why can't things ever be simple? Maybe I could just pretend, at least for now.


I'll answe reviews in the next chapter(: