During what was either his second or third novel one of his characters had been rendered unconscious. The prose that had been written around their awakening described a floating sensation and an experience like the gentle coaxing away from a dream. When their eyes had opened they were surrounded by warmth and light, and the arms of a lover who only wished for them to be okay. Unlike his own interpretation of how the events should have occurred, Karkat's eventual awakening was nothing like he had imagined.

When the blackness had decided to loosen its hold on his mind the day's events crashed back into him. The sensation of falling and sucking air into his lungs, sinking, choking, it all returned to him with a clarity that shot him straight into a sitting position, movement far too quick causing his stomach to lurch and the contents to be emptied on the grass beside him.

Grass. The input didn't make sense, and he looked around feverishly. His back was sore from the cold cement he had been lying on, cloths damp but not dripping. A glance upwards confirmed that his railing had collapsed, parts of it scattered along the patio and a chunk resting partially in the pool. There was no sign of anyone else around and he shuffled unsteadily to his knees. The pavement where he had been was off color, wet to the touch.

When he moved to his feet pain erupted inside his head, a pounding so intense it induced another round of vomiting. Giving up on the standing thing he plopped back onto the ground, cursing when he landed on his tailbone. The breeze picked up and he shivered, a glance at the sky letting him know it was almost evening. He briefly wondered how he would get up to the house.

"Forget that," he muttered to himself, "How the fuck did I get out of the pool."

He eyed the once beloved body of water with a newly found sense of distrust and suspicion. The small waves lapped calmly at the sides, beckoning for him to come and enjoy its coolness and to stretch his muscles. He scowled and flicked it off.

"Like hell I'm using you again. Ever." With a groan he attempted to get back to his feet again, slower than the first time and when the headache threatened to resurface he stopped to breath. When everything steadied he shuffled to the broken section of railing. It was partially submerged, as if it had bounced off the pavement and into the pool. There was nothing obvious keeping in place, and when he gave a cautious tug it slid free of the water with little issue. He tossed it towards the rest of the garbage he had cleaned earlier but the movement left him leaning on the house legs for support. He massaged his eyes to ease the pressure behind them, the rubbing help ease the tension.

"Just you fucking wait. As soon as this is all done I am filling you in and replacing you with an above ground pool. At least when that abomination starts inviting sea life into it I can just puncture the damn thing instead of almost getting eaten."

A splash caused him to cease his ministrations and another had him lowering his hand altogether. A dark shape moved just below the murky surface, circling around the far side of the pool. It moved slowly back and forth, almost cautiously as it advanced in his direction before retreating once again. Karkat ignored his instincts screaming for self preservation as he leaned over the edge to try and get a clearer view.

"I'm on land." He told himself as he inched as close as possible without releasing his lifeline, "No shark can get me up here. It would have to be like, a shark with tentacles. A tenta-shark, sharkto-squid, fucking arms instead of fins and there is nothing to be afraid of Karkat Vantas I swear to fuck if you don't pull your shit together –"

"You talk to yourself a lot you know. If you happen to be lookin for a conversational partner I'd be pretty willin to help you out."

Karkat was back against the support beam, spine pressed ramrod straight and clutching it as if he could pass right on through. There was a torso in his pool, but it was leaning up on the edge with crossed arms and a smiling face but the skin was grey and there were gills on its neck. The creatures' smile grew larger, lips pulling back to reveal a row of sharp looking teeth and it pushed itself up to lean closer.

"First you wouldn't stop talkin and now you won't say a word. I don't bite or anyfin."

"What the fuck are you and is that a tail?" Karkat asked; voice completely steady and manly and not border lining hysterical at all. The question caused the smile to drop from the creatures face and it lowered itself until just its shoulders were out of the water.

"Here I go outta my way to make some conversation with a freakin land dweller and you have to be rude piece a shit right off." It actually sounded offended and Karkat almost laughed at the indignation. "Not to mention you kinda owe me since I've saved your life twice today and you haven't even thanked me yet. Make that three times, but with you lookin like that I don't really mind it."

The creature stopped speaking and purple-on-gold eyes trailed up and down his torso and the smile returned, this time with a satisfied air. Karkat felt a blush rise in his face and he looked down in sudden shyness to notice a portion of his shirt was torn, revealing the curve of his stomach and hip. He pulled the ends of what remained of his shirt down over the exposed skin and glared at his new enemy.

"Was this you? Do perverts also have fins and gills because I thought they were just a land thing. I swear to god if you did this so I would owe you something; don't think that making me think my life was in danger to give you favors-"

"What do you take me for? That's more a thin my brother would try an pull. I was the one who pulled you out when you fell and resuscitated you for fuck's sake. And if you really wanna know what did that to you," it disappeared for barely a second before it was back, heaving something out of the pool before him. "It was this."

Karkat let out a very manly shriek as a three foot hammerhead thrashed wildly before his feet. Any remaining nausea he had was forgotten as he flew to his stairs, reaching the deck landing and throwing himself into his kitchen. He paused only long enough to hear the sounds of the animal being dragged back into his pool before booking it up the stairs and into his room, slamming the door behind him.

At first there had been yelling from the pool below, all indignant squawks and curses. After those died down there came the pleading which had been rather pathetic. When it had become obvious to the creature that his efforts wouldn't elicit a response, Karkat thought he could relax some. Then there was a bang on the side of his house, and then another and he feared that it could somehow climb his siding.

A daring glance out the window had erased that worry, the noises being caused by bits and pieces of debris being hurled at his house. While the aim was horrid – it was going for his open window – the strength behind it was leaving small dents in the siding. When hours had passed and the sun had set with no elicited response the noises stopped and Karkat had finally allowed himself a chance to relax.

The room was dark, and with no power he fumbled around until his hands groped his laptop and he yanked it onto his lap. The lid was flipped open, the accompanying glow of start-up causing him to wince. As soon as his eyes adjusted he opened his Trollian account and selected Sollux's handle.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

CG: HOLY SHIT SOLLUX PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE ONLINE.

TA: what the hell kk iit'2 liike fuck o'clock iin the morning.

CG: IS IT? MY POWER HAS BEEN OUT SINCE YOU DROPPED ME OFF. MY BATTERY IS LOW SO I NEED TO MAKE THIS QUICK. COME OVER.

TA: liike riight now? you're fuckiing kiidiing. go fuck your2elf on 2omethiing unplea2ant for me untiil you regaiin your 2en2e2.

CG: NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. THERE IS SOMETHING IN MY POOL. TWO SOMETHINGS ACTUALLY, ONE OF THEM TRIED TO KILL ME. MAYBE THEY BOTH DID WHO KNOWS. LOOK IT EVEN FITS YOUR WEIRD TWO FIXATION JUST PLEASE COME OVER AT YOUR EARLIEST CONVENIENCE, WHICH BY THE WAY MEANS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.

TA: why ii2 later not good enough. can ii just vote for later? ii wa2 already planniing on 2howiing up early wiith real food why does that not plea2e your royalne22?

CG: IF YOU MUST KNOW ONE OF THEM SPOKE TO ME.

The icon indicated Sollux was typing a response, and as Karkat waited for the reply the screen blackened and the mechanical noises ceased.

"No!" Karkat hissed at the machine, slamming his finger on the power button. "Don't you dare be dead. I need to convince that fuckwit to get over here before my ass get eaten by that thing down there and like hell I am facing it alone!"

When no response or sign of life came from it Karkat slammed the cover shut and pushed it away from him. It slid several inches from the force and bumped a small rectangular shape into the moonlight. He found his mood lift when he grabbed it, even a sense of glee as he flipped the screen to find it still had life yet. He contemplated calling his friend, but without some form of proof the asshole would never believe him.

Decision made and plan half baked, Karkat extracted himself from his blanket cocoon and carefully made his way downstairs. When he reached the kitchen he tiptoed to the counter and picked up the previously discarded camera. He switched it on and moved to the floor, laying flat on his stomach before inching his way onto the deck. He stopped just shy of the missing rail, carefully peeking over the edge at the water below.

He saw no movement, no signs of the uninvited freeloader and he figured the fatal flaw in his plan. If it didn't surface he couldn't get a picture, and no picture meant Sollux would not believe him. He didn't want to call out to attract the creatures' attention, and he wasn't brave enough to stick any extremities over the edge to signal for it. There was still no real guarantee it wasn't going to eat him and he did not want to find out how high it could jump.

He set the camera off to the side and crawled back into the kitchen, opening the freezer and pulling out a slightly chilled box of fish fingers. Waste of money or not, these would still find some use in revealing the existence of the garden-pool monster. Back on the deck he popped the box open and fished the first piece from inside. Camera at the ready he gave the food item a short toss and it plopped into the water.

He heard a slosh at some point but there was no other sign of the thing, and feeling frustrated he threw another. When several minutes had passed with still no result he felt his tempter growing. A third of the box later and he was fuming, and at half he just dumped the rest of it over the side. The box was chucked too for good measure.

"Enough!" the roar caught Karkat off guard and he jumped, dropping the camera in shock. "Fuckin incredible that you think you can just dump this shit in here like your expectin' me to eat it. This place is only so big and I'm not lettin' it rot while I'm stuck in it."

Karkat ventured to look over the side and ducked just in time for breaded fish projectiles to fly past his head. The thing was down there, glaring up at him with every set of fins it had flared and teeth flashing.

"I know you're up there homo-moronous I can see your fuckin shadow!"

Karkat, feeling pinned between a rock and a hard place, and way too tired to give a damn anymore finally stuck his head over and met the others' gaze.

"My name is Karkat Vantas," he said, narrowing his eyes at it. "Before you tell me anything else I need to know, what the hell are you?"

The thing rolled its violet eyes at him but the fins flattened, and Karkat was reminded of a ballon with all the air let out.

"I'm a fucking merman, haven't you ever read a book before?"

"Of fucking course I have!" he snarled in return. They stared each other down before he spoke again. "Second thing I want to know, what the hell am I supposed to call you while you're floating in my pool; and thirdly, are you going to eat me?"

"Of all the retarded." The thing, merman, actually flicked him off with webbed fingers. Karkat couldn't help but be impressed. "Look my name's Eridan, Eridan Ampora and of course I'm not goin' to eat you. That'd be fuckin unconscionable."