(Companion piece for Chapter 4 – cont'd)
"Come in, come in, the show is about to start," urged Cagalli. "Seize a seat fast, or pick a lap you'll be."
Pick a lap. A term they had used if there are no empty seats left, not to mention it would mean sprawling across each other's laps, with looping arms about each other's shoulders. She stood in dismay looking at the doorway. She was still disappointed and mad at him for declining her offer. She turned her head, realizing there are no available seats left, and only one lap left unoccupied.
And it's none other than Kira. He raised a jovial gaze to her, held up his hand to her in a welcoming gesture.
She swallowed hard against a suddenly dry throat. She looked around frantically. Surely there had to be another chair? Or a stool. Or whatever things that can be sit on as long as it is not HIS lap! But she found nothing, not even a floor space.
"Maybe I should invite Alex again." she suggested. "I brought him here with me, so I don't think it's a good idea if I left him alone outside."
Cagalli scoffed, "Relax Lacus. He won't get kidnapped or anything. Besides, there are plenty of people out there partying. I'm pretty sure he'll survive a few minutes without you. Most of us here don't even know the guy, so basically he's like…an outsider."
She narrowed her eyes with a look of disapproval which Cagalli didn't notice. She sighed and reluctantly turned to Kira, whose gaze lingered on her face. His gaze penetrated hers, as if he knew of her reluctance to sit on his lap.
"Here," he finally said, rising slowly without breaking eye contact. "Take the seat. I'll just sta—"
"No, no, don't be silly!" What am I doing? Take the chair! Let him stand. She caught his shoulders and pressed him back down, smiling at him. "That's okay. I don't mind...sitting on your lap." I can get through this, she swore to herself.
The light was turned off, and Cagalli's ballad rock music blared from the speakers as colors flashed across the screen.
Kira instinctively shifted his body in the chair, allowing her into a more comfortable position against his chest. She instantly resisted. She didn't want to be comfortable. She remained rigid and tense, not allowing her back to rest against him. 'Just calm down, Lacus'
The show, she realized, had already begun. She'd somehow missed the opening but smiled as the others gave teasing comments and shared hilarious remarks about every photo displayed.
And then an unexpected photo came, it made her smile wobble and her heart lurch deeply. It was a close-up photo of Kira and her, embracing each other, deeply involved in a kiss. His hand was placed at her back, while the other entangled in her hair. Their eyes closed, their faces flushed with passion, lust…love.
"Whew! Is it me, or is it getting hot in here? Someone get me a bucket of ice!"
Chuckles and groans rose around her, but she sat still in silence, struggling to breath past her thundering heart. The screen had long changed but she could no longer focus. The photo of Kira and her kissing reminded her too vividly of what had gone on between them.
Then she began to feel of Kira's soft breath against her neck. She didn't dare look at him. She couldn't bear it. How could she? She couldn't even sit through anymore photos of them together.
A muffled rose from her throat, and she shifted forward to rise from his lap.
But quickly Kira caught her. He gripped her hip and thigh, her gaze swung to him with surprised wide eyes. The light in the room may be dimmed but she was very aware of his movement, realizing that his attention was directed to her mouth.
"Let me go," she said in a tremulous whisper. She felt very relief when he did immediately.
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She furiously headed out of the room; she needed to get out of there, she needs to find a place where she could be alone. She veered through the first escape she saw—the glass doors that led to the outside the house.
She breathed in deeply the cold night air. It would take her awhile to bring her temperature back into line. She was flushed with heat from embarrassment, and mostly from anger.
It was very humiliating to see how she was so obviously infatuated with a man who never even really cared about her. He had simply taken what she'd been so happy and stupid to give. But still…
What made him think he even had the right to touch her in any way, let alone to hold her against her will? Why in heaven's name had he even wanted to? Was it to prove to her that he still could? Or to show that he still had the power to corrupt her common sense?
She heard the quiet opening of the glass door behind her, and bit her lip in dismay. She really did need a few more moments alone to calm herself. She swiftly turned around to reluctantly greet whoever had joined her, immediately her dismay deepened ten times fold.
"Lacus, I'm sorry," he expressed his regret. "I was out of line when I tried to stop you from leaving. I don't know what I was thinking."
"Forget it, Kira" She lifted a negligent shoulder. "It's no big deal." She gave him a meaningful stare, "Just don't let it happen again."
He held her stare, looking rather surprised. "Don't let what happen again?"
"Don't…" She swallowed hard. Don't touch me, or hold me, or make my heart pound. "…manhandle me."
He narrowed his eyes and gave her a small grin, "You've changed a lot, Lacus."
"I'm glad you've noticed."
Kira turned away and sighed, then looked back at her, "I guess I just wanted to have the chance to talk to you before you… you know, rushed off somewhere."
She raised an eyebrow. He'd changed too. "What did you want to talk to me about?"
"I assume you must be very embarrassed by the photos," his tone business-like.
She stiffened, unsure of how to respond. "Embarrassed? Why should I be embarrassed?"
"Let's see, maybe because we made damn fools of ourselves every chance we got?" he casually replied her.
"Oh. That."
"Yes, that." He sighed again, "I suppose I pretty much behaved like a sex-crazed idiot back then, didn't I?"
For some unknown reason, she was beginning to feel vindicated, "You suppose correctly."
"And I…took full advantage of your…innocence."
His words especially his voice caused her chest to throb painfully. "If you hadn't someone else would have, I'm sure."
Kira's scrutinizing eyes shifted to search her face. A frown filled his face as he nodded, "Then I owe you another apology. I shouldn't have said those things to you when I left. You didn't deserve any of it. I'm sorry."
She gaped at him. She had never expected this, not in this lifetime. An actual apology from the infamous Kira Yamato. She struggled to find her voice. "No, don't be sorry. You only told me the truth. If it was harsh, well…" she shrugged, realizing as she spoke that she believed what she was saying "…at least you forced me to face the facts."
Which had also been the hardest thing she had ever done. Memories from that fateful incident rose in her mind…
"Love?" he'd scoffed as he'd packed his bags. "I don't love you, Lacus. I never did. I just want you. There's a big difference. And this is the only 'real' thing we've ever had between us." And he placed her hand forcefully on his crotch.
Grappling to hide the pain that memory still inflicted, she went on in a soft, soothing tone, "In fact, I believe I owe you my thanks. You had taught me a very valuable lesson."
"I was a son of a bitch and you know it, Lacus. I wouldn't blame you if you never—"
"No," she shook her head. "I mean it, Kira. You really did teach me a lesson, an important too. Do you remember how dead set I was on telling my dad to go to hell when he insisted that I break up with you?"
Kira fell silent and slowly nodded.
"I was ready to give up all his financial support and pay my own way, even if it meant dropping out of college. How could I have been so crazy? I was willing to throw my future away, and for what? A silly thing called love!"
She mimicked the exact tone he'd used with her, all those years ago. "I know better now, of course. Thank you for your honesty. You could have told me some pretty lie but instead, make me face reality, and I learned from my mistakes."
He remained silent, his amethyst eyes never leaving her.
She gazed deeply into his eyes. "So I do thank you. You didn't hurt me in any lasting way. You actually helped me." Although she meant every word, these last few stuck in her throat, but she knew she had to force them out. "And time did prove you right. There wasn't anything between us except…sex."
Something flashed within his eyes, but quickly faded away. His lips thinned. His jaw squared. His voice was dangerously soft when he spoke, "So…does that mean that you forgive me?"
"Yes, I forgive you," she said firmly.
They stared at each other for what seem like an eternity.
Then he placed his arms around her and pulled her slowly into a hug. "Thank you, Lacus Clyne," Kira breathed into her hair, "for your forgiveness."
"And thank you, Kira Yamato, for your apology," she replied in a breathless whisper against his shoulder.
"You're shivering."
"We should go inside."
He drew back just far enough to peer down at her. "I think I have a better way to stay warm." Slowly he lowered his head, closed his eyes and took her mouth in a deep, moving kiss.
Her eyes went wide in a dazed astonishment that he would do such a thing. That she would even let him. Desire immediately flared in her. She eventually gave herself over to it, wanting the kiss to last forever.
Out of nowhere, a sound of crashing glass came. And quickly her sanity came back with dizzying speed.
What am I doing? What am I thinking kissing him back? Have I completely lost my mind? Yes, I have!
With a moan of dismay, she pulled free of his kiss. "Why did you do that?" she whispered frantically between breaths.
His breathing pattern matches hers. "For the same reason you didn't stop me." His voice was low and hoarse in lust.
He narrowed his eyes at her, "Tell me, Lacus, why didn't you stop me?"
She backed away from him, "Curiosity. Just…curiosity." As soon as she was sure she was at a safe distance away from him, she stood straight and stared at him, "And I assure you, it's been satisfied," she quickly move to pass him.
But he quickly caught her wrist and spun her around facing him; he smirked and began lowering his lips towards hers again. "I don't believe curiosity had much to do with it. And don't even tell me you're satisfied. I know you, Lacus. And I think you know you want more too. I can feel it when I kiss you."
She gulped and held her breath; her eyes unable to focus on anything except his lips. Forcing her vision back onto his face, she noticed that he seemed to be staring at something behind her. She followed his gaze and saw that the glass door is broken. And blood was dripping from the shattered glass.
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~ I may forget what you said, but I'll never forget how you made me feel.
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(Whew, finally, the awaited chapter! I present to you some little insight on Lacus and Kira's history together. My head can't stop re-playing the song White Flag by Dido, I think it fits perfectly for Kira in this. Do check the poll on my profile, and place your votes. I 'might' continue it, once I get the green light from the author and after I complete this fic. There's a lot I want to say, but I guess I better keep it to myself. So for now, enjoy reading this.)
