Justin

Last night I had a dream. In the dream, Brian approached me just as he had the first night he brought me back to his loft. I stood under the streetlight near Babylon trying to look like I belonged on Liberty Avenue. Wearing a white t-shirt under a blue plaid shirt and baggy blue jeans, I look hopelessly out of place. Brian walks up stunningly gorgeous as always and asked me "How's it going, had a busy night?" I give him some bull shit about checking out the bars.

"Where you headed?" he asks.

I respond "No place special"

Then he says "I can change that"

Only in the dream I don't go with him. I leave and go home.

I awoke with Brian's arm around me; he was snuggling up close so I could feel his breath on my neck. I made no attempt to move but Brian, sensing my wakefulness, pulls me closer to him, squeezing me tighter. I recall his words that night: I can change that.

Brian shifts his legs, rubbing his feet against mine. "Good Morning Sunshine" he whispers into my ear.

Stretching, I roll on my back so I could look at him. "Mm, Good Morning yourself"

Brian runs his hand over my cheek, gazing at me adoringly. His stare used to be my poison, like one of Rage's super-powers; he could completely control me with those eyes. Now I see nothing but my future when I look into them. He kisses me slowly and gently; shock-waves of emotions run through me. His hands travel down my body, expertly navigating every sensitive area. His exploration leaves me trembling with anticipation. "Justin" he mummers softly while snuggling his face into the crook of my neck. "Thank you" he whispers.

Confused, I ask "For what?"

"For not giving up on me; on us…" he's on the verge of tears. "…for loving me so much, even when I couldn't…" his voice trailed off.

"Hey, it's okay" I sit up so I can wrap my arms around him "It's okay, Brian, we made it" I stroke his hair and kiss the top of his head, and hold him tight against my chest. I held him like that as long as I could "Baby" I finally whispered "If you're still planning to marry me today; we should probably get out of bed"


Brian

I descend the stairs into what should be my family room and am met with utter chaos. Emmett stands at the center of the room conducting an orchestra of workers. I plan my route through the chairs, flowers, lights, musical instruments and people to my kitchen for a badly needed cup of coffee. I was absolutely lesbianic this morning; I don't mind if Justin sees that but I would have to hold it together during the ceremony or I would never live it down. I figure it will be easier to go out the front door and around the house to the sliding glass doors; I take one step off the landing towards the door and Emmett stops me.

"Where, pray tell, are you going Mr. Kinney?" he asks

"To my kitchen" I snarled back "Do you mind?"

"You can't go in the kitchen the caterers are setting up" Emmett informs me.

"Well, then, I am going to Starbucks. I need coffee." I explain

"Honey, I already took care of you. My assistant will be here in less than five minutes with breakfast for you and Justin as well as your soy latte" he guides me back to the stairs "Now go back upstairs and relax with Justin"

"Well I will go pick up Gus then" I turn back to the door.

"Lindsay and Mel are bringing him" his arm redirecting me to the stairs. "Now you have about two hours before you need to be getting dressed"

Reluctantly, I head back up the stairs and join Justin in his studio. "Emmett thinks I am trying to escape and he won't let me leave the house" I laugh

"Yeah I know" Justin offers looking up from his sketch pad, "I'm the one who gave the order. Are you having cold feet?"

"Never" I insist wrapping my arms around him from behind "Just feeling a little stir crazy. I might get a workout in and burn off some of this energy."

"Good thing we have a home gym" he laughs "I finished packing us for the honeymoon. You might take a second look in case I forgot something you wanted to bring"

"What's to pack, all we need is a few dildo's and plenty of lube?" I joked.

"Well I threw in a couple of suits, jeans, a speedo, a toothbrush…you know just in case we need to leave the room"

"Ah, I see" I kissed the top of his head "thanks for taking care of the packing. You take such good care of me"

I reached down unbuttoning his jeans sliding my hand into his pants. "Hey, isn't there something in the wedding vows about to have and to hold…?" I grabbed his cock and started stroking it.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not what it's referring to" he laughed pulling me in for a kiss.

"I think I found a better way to burn off my nervous energy" pulling him up and spinning him around.


Justin

I managed to stay calm all morning but as I left the bathroom and headed to pull my suit out of the closet, the nerves set in. I stood there staring at it. Brian walked up behind me, running his hand over my upper arm. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" he asked.

"Are you kidding?" I joked "I should be asking you that? "

"I bought you something" he said pulling a small bag hidden in the back of our closet.

I opened the Tiffany box containing gorgeous cufflinks, JTK, the engraving read.

"JTK?" I raised my eyebrow

"We didn't discuss it…" he said taking the box from me and inspecting them closely "…and I don't expect you to change your professional name but I would like it if you would use my name socially"

"Justin Taylor-Kinney?" I smiled "I love the sound of that"


Brian

I had just finished dressing when there was a knock at our door. "Come in" I called out.

The door opened and Molly entered, wearing a stunning red dress her blond hair swept up. "Wow Molly, you look gorgeous" I exclaimed.

"Thanks Brian" she lit up giving me a kiss "You look great. Where's Justin?"

"He's in the bathroom, still primping" I offered, "Justin" I called out to get his attention

Justin joined us in the bedroom. "Holy Shit Mollusk, you look so grown up!"

"Thanks" she smiled looking serious; she pulled two small envelopes from her purse. "I don't want to interrupt you but I have something for you and I wanted to give it to you before anyone else showed up"

"What is it?" Justin asked concerned.

"They're letters…" Molly held out the envelopes "….from mom"

"What?" Justin asked grabbing the letters from his sister, "When?"

"She gave them to me before she died, she made me promise to give them to you on your wedding day" she explained "she always knew you two would make it."

"I'm just so happy for you both and I am so happy that you forgave me for all the stupid shit I did when I was living with dad. I love you both so much." She turned to leave.

"Wait Molly" Justin called out. He embraced his sister. "I have something for you too" he said pulling a box from the top drawer of his dresser.

He handed the box to Molly, "Mom gave this to me before she died; she asked me to give it to you. She said I would know when the time was right. I was saving it for your college graduation but I think the time is right now"

Molly opened the box, tears falling down her cheek, "its great-grandma's ring" she gasped staring at the one carat ruby and diamond ring that had been passed down to four generations of her family. She placed the ring on her finger. "Thank you" she said hugging us both before leaving us alone with Jennifer's words.

The envelopes were addressed to each of us; Justin handed me the letter with my name on it.

I took a deep breath and opened the letter sitting down on the bed with him

My Dearest Brian;

If you're reading this, you've finally come to your senses. When I brought you Justin's things that day in your office after he first left home; I was terrified I was losing my son. I saw a man, clinging desperately to his adolescence, who had no heart. Then after we really almost lost him, I brought him to you. I asked you to take him, to save him and you did. It was then I realized what Justin had seen all along. That you have the biggest heart; it was just protected behind a fortress you've spent thirty years building up. But Justin knew it was there and never stopped trying to reach it.

I was so blessed to finally meet the real you, the man you were meant to be, the man who loves fearlessly. It was then I stopped being afraid of losing Justin and realized what a wonderful son I had gained. You should never be afraid to let others see that man as well. I know you will always take care of my son and protect him. I wish I could be there to witness you state publicly what has been obvious to those around you for so long; how very much you love each other. But since I cannot be there, I want you to remember these things as you start your married life together: First, even though I'm gone know you had a mother who loves you exactly for the man you are. Second, never be too proud to let him take care of you when you need him to. Lastly, accept his love because no matter what anyone told you, you deserve it.

All my love,

Jennifer


Justin

Brian placed the letter on the bed and grabbed my hand. I looked down at it staring at my own envelope. "I don't think I'm ready to read it" I said quietly.

"It's all right" he placed his arm around me "Do you want me to read it to you?" he offered

I shook my head no. I took a deep breath and opened the letter.

My Dearest Justin,

The day you were born was one of the happiest days of my life. Even on my darkest days, your smile was contagious. You spent so much of your childhood being the perfect son; you did well in school, you were such a talented artist, and you made me so proud. I took for granted that because you were smiling you were happy. When you left home, I was so confused, not because you were gay but because it was obvious how unhappy, how frustrated you had been. I didn't understand how I could have missed the pain my own son was going through; how you would think you had to pretend to be someone other than who you were so that I would be proud of you. It's one of the great regrets of my life.

The truth is you made me so proud everyday; you are so brave, so generous, and so caring. You fight for what you want and those that you love. You value the truly important things in life. You never let anyone or anything stand between you and your dreams. I admire all these things about you my sweet boy.

You have reached this day because you never stopped fighting for each other, and you never should. The love you two share is truly rare, it's amazing that you overcame the obstacles others put in your way, but a miracle you overcame the ones you built yourselves. My hope for you and Brian is that you will always face obstacles together and never stop fighting for each other.

I hope today is the beginning of another dream come true for you. I life filled with love and joy. Be good to each other and whatever you do, don't stop following your dreams.

All my love,

Mom


Brian

Justin and I spent a few quiet moments holding each other before Emmett came knocking on the door. "Boys, we're ready for you"

I stood up and took Justin's hand. "You ready beautiful?" I asked

He stood up and followed me down the stairs. We were greeted by our family: Molly, Daphne, Debbie, Carl, Michael, Ben, Hunter, J.R., Lindsay, Melanie, Gus, Ted, Blake and Emmett. The house had been transformed, it was ridiculously romantic. The trio of musicians started playing; I smiled at Justin when I noticed there was a conspicuously absent violinist. He nodded at me, acknowledging the significance.

Most of the guests were already seated. Emmett escorted Molly to her seat. Followed by Ben, Hunter and J.R.; Carl with Debbie; Ted and Blake; finally by Lindsay and Melanie.

"It's time" Emmett said.

I took Gus's hand and Justin and I walked to the front of the room with Michael and Daphne, our witnesses, to join the minister.

I took Justin's hands in front a room full of family and friends while staring in his eyes. My hands were sweating, my heart beating fast.

Before I knew it the minister was prompting me for my vows….

My Dearest Justin

Trying to write words to describe how much I love you is like trying to describe what water taste like.

When I look at you, I see my future

Your beauty, heart and mind inspire me to be the best version of myself.

I promise to love you for eternity, and to let you love me;

I promise to comfort you when you need it, and to let you comfort me

I promise to remain faithful, and to protect your heart as I would my own

I love you. You're all I want. You're all I need.


Justin

I looked down at my left hand to the ring Brian had placed there not an hour ago. Holding the champagne glass and listening to Michael's and Daphne's toasts. Of course there was gentle ribbing about our promiscuous past, our age difference, and plenty of disbelief they would see the day when Brian settled down but the speeches were touching and affirming. I don't think I have ever been so blissfully happy.

The band was great; we danced our asses off. Everything was incredibly beautiful. Brian looked so handsome. Gus was adorable. The food was delicious. The entire ceremony and reception passed in a blur.

The guest had all left, except Molly of course, and Emmett who stayed behind to oversee the cleaning crew.

Brian called out to Emmett, "Is the limo here?"

He nodded giving me a smile.

"Brian, why is there a limo, our flight doesn't leave until tomorrow afternoon." I asked.

"You'll see" he said taking my hand and leading me out to the limo. The driver was packing our suitcases in the trunk.

"Not that one" Brian told the driver pointing to a small duffel bag "I brought us a change of clothes" he explained "Please put that one in the back with us." He instructed the driver.

I climbed in the back of the limo with Brian. "Where are we going?"

"First things first, let's get you changed" he said rolling up the partition in the limo.

Brian undressed me quickly. After giving my naked body plenty of attention he stopped "We can't have our first time as husband and husband rushed in the back of a limo" he explained. "We have a lifetime for that".

We both changed into more comfortable clothes before stopping. The limo driver opened the door. I climbed out and much to my dismay; we were at Brian's old loft. He led me into the elevator.

"Brian, what's going on?" I asked again


Brian

"I couldn't sell it" I admitted as we entered the familiar space. "This is the place we made love for the first time"

"That wasn't love, you just gave me a rim job and fucked my brains out remember" he laughed using my words against me.

"Not that time" I explained "After Gus's first birthday party; when you let me touch you again after the bashing. You said you wanted me inside you. You asked me to take it easy like the first time. Being with you then, that was my first time. That was my first time making love to you or anyone for that matter; it was a year exactly after we met."

"You've had the loft this whole time and you never told me", he asked in disbelief.

"I was renting it out but when the last lease was up, I left it empty" I said. "I actually own the whole building now" I confessed.

"The whole building?" He still looked puzzled "Why?"

"Well this part of Tremont isn't as much residential anymore" I explained "commercial values were really rising so it was a good investment and I wanted to control what happened to the building. I couldn't let it become a Gap Kids"

He walked around taking the space in. It looked much bigger with most of the furniture gone.

"I found a tenant for the first floor" I said smiling "He's already started renovating. Come see"

I led Justin into the ground floor space. "What is this?" he asked seeing the large open space, with white walls, and beautiful hard wood floors.

I led him to the front of the space, a large reception desk marking the entrance from the street.


Justin

Justin Taylor Gallery was written in large black letters above the reception desk. Just under the letters was my painting Fatherhood.

"Brian" I said "I'm just an artist. I can't run a gallery."

"True, you can't but Lindsay can" he offered kissing me "I already convinced her to take the job. She secured this painting for you. I didn't think you were ready to let it go quite yet. You just have to show your work or find other artist to show. She will help you. You will help others."

I was speechless as we returned to the loft on the third floor. I heard the sound of the lock close and memories of our time together in this space flooded back. Brian walked me to our old bed and made love to me for the first time as my husband. We collapsed in exhaustion together and lay there, my head on his chest, his arms around me, just enjoying the new level of intimacy our marriage had brought to sex.

"Brian" I finally said "Do you miss this place?"

He looked at me and nodded "Of course"

"I have an idea…." I paused

He stared at me silently waiting for me to elaborate.

"I love Britin" I started "I know you bought it because you wanted me to have the house of my dreams but sometimes it doesn't feel like us exactly."

"Do you want to redecorate?" He offered.

"No" he was missing my point "What if we remodeled this place and lived here again?"

"Justin" he smiled at me "this place isn't big enough for a family. Gus needs a room, where would you put a nursery…."

"You're right, the loft isn't big enough, but if we combined the second and third floors…."

"Are you serious?" he asked "I thought you hated living here"

"I didn't hate it and you loved it" I clarified. "You'd be close to work and Gus. I'd see more of you since your commute would be next to nothing. Plus I will be able to stay involved with the gallery after the baby comes"

Brian looked ecstatic. "Really?" he asked again "You would do that? That is a fucking unbelievable idea Sunshine"